maoxianxiaoshuo《daizaixiangqin，faxianpinqiongqianrenbianshoufule》，yiluanrantanxuweizhujiaodegushi。zuozhelanxiaohujingxingousileyixiliejingxiancijideqingjie，rangduzhechongfentiyandaolemaoxiandelequhejinzhangciji。zheibenshujueduishimaoxianmimendebuerzhixuan。wunianbujian，tanxufengcaibujiandangnian，yijiujunlangshuaiqi，meiyujianhaiduolejifenshangweizhecaiyoudechenwenganlian。……
nianniandianzhejiao，zhanzailubianlanlehenjiu，zhongyuyouyiliangchuzuchetinglexialai。
chemendakai，tashoujiaobingyongdipashangche，zaisijilvedaizhenjingdemuguangzhong，naishengnaiqidao：“sijishushu，woyaoqutl.gongsi，xiexienin！”
“xiaopengyou，nijiadarenni？”
“womamishangbanqule，woyaoquzhaowodexinbaba！”nianniansihaobupasheng，congbaolinachuyizhangbaiyuandachao，jiaoaodiyangqixiaonaodai：“woyouqianfuchefei，ninfangxin！”
jianzhuang，sijibuzaiyouyu，yijiaoyoumenqidongchezi。
……
tl.gongsi，yilouxiuxishi。
yiqunnvyuangongjiangyigechuanzhehaimianbaobaoliantikudexiaopengyoutuantuanweizhu，shoulinazhelingshi，shibushizaitaguanghuadexiaoliandanshangnieyiba。
“aiyou，zheihaizizhenkeai，zheishisheijiadexiaopengyoupaolaigongsile？”
“xiaopengyou，nijiaoshenmemingzi，nibabamamashishei？ayizheiliyoudangao，niyaobuyaochi？”
nianniankanzhenvyuangongshoulidedangao，yibenzhengjingdihuida：
“xiexieayi，tiandianchiduolehuizhuyade，niannianbuchi！”
女员工被萌到了：
“zheihaizizhendongshi，wojiawayaoshiyezheimetinghuajiuhaole。”
“xiaopengyou，nilaigongsishixiangzhaoshei？”
niannianminleminchun，jiabianluchuyigeqianqiandeliwo：“woyaojiannimengongsidezongcai，tanxu！”
“……”
zhongrenxianshichenmo，suihourenbuzhuqieqiesiyu。
“zheihaizishitanzongjiadeqinqi？ganjuetahetanzongzhangdehenxianga！”
“gaibuhuishisishengziba？”
“shenme，zongcaiyouerzile？！”
zhongrenzhenjingdikanxiangniannian，yuekanyuejuedehetanzongzhangdehenxiang，jianzhijiushisuoxiaobandetanzong！
shijingle，yuanlaishixiaoshaoye！
“xiaoshao……ke，xiaopengyou，tanzongzhengzaikaihui，nixianzaizheilidengyihuier，dengtanzongkaiwanlehui，womenhuidainiqujiantade。”
“haode，xiexieayi。”
念念乖乖道。
……
tanxukaileyishangwudehui，gangjieshuhuiyihuidaobangongshi，jiukanjianzijidehaoyoujianhezuohuobanfuchenzhouyilianbiexiaodizhanzaitamianqian。
“你抽什么风？”
tanxumianwubiaoqingdao，fuchenzhourenzhexiao，qingleqingsangzi：
“shizheiyangde，jintianshangwugongsililaileyigexiaohai，zhimingdaoxingshuoshiyaojianni；zheihaizizhangdegenniyoudianxiang，suoyidajiafenfencaicetakenengshinidesishengzi。”
“muqiangongsililiuchuanzheguanyunihezheigehaiziguanxideduogebanben，wogangcailaigongsishi，tingdaodezuixinbanbenshi，zheihaizishiniliuluozaiwaidesishengzi，duonianqiannifengliuchengxingyouleta，paoqiqizichuguochuangye，liutamenguerguamugukulingding。”
fuchenzhouyaotouhuangnao，zezeliangsheng：“zha，zhenshigouzha！”
谈栩：“？”
“有病吃药。”
tataijiaomaichubangongshi，tadaoyaokankan，shisheizheimewuliaoganzaotadeyao。
tanxuzoujinyilouxiuxishi，yuanbenhaiyouxiejijizhazhadexiuxishi，likeanjingdeluozhenkewen。
jiantanxulaile，zhongrenlikeshixiangdituichuqu，quehaishirenbuzhuduozaimenkoutouting，beisuihouganlaidetezhulinnanyigeyanshenhetuile。
nianniantiaoxiashafa，laidaotanxumianqian，yangtoukanta；tanxuchuimou，yishunjianyouxiehuanghu，zheihaiziguozhenzhangdehetayouxiexiang，danneishuanglingdongdedayanjing，quehemougerengengxiang。
tajihuyiyanqueding，tashiluanrandehaizi。
“nijiushitanxu，womamadejiehunduixiang？”
nianniankaikou，sihaobujudishenshizhegaodadenanren。
“wojiaolunian，jinniansisui，niyinggaizhidaowoba？”
“嗯。”
tanxudunxiashen，ruobushinianlingduibushang，tachadianyaoyiweiniannianshitadehaizi。
“找我有什么事？”
xiaojiahuodanzihenda，jingranganbeizheluanranyigerenlaigongsizhaota，zheibanwusuoguji，hengchongzhizhuangdemoyang，hedangniandemourenhenxiang。
xiangdaozhei，tanxushengyinbujuefangroulejifen。
“我要挑战你！”
niannianshuangshouchayao，zhongqishizudihoudao：“womamishitiandixiazuihaodemami，nengpeideshangwomamidenanren，bixuyaobiwozhangdehaokan，biwocongming，biwogengyoudandang！fouzewoshibuhuibamamijiaojinide！”
“zhangxiangma，wojinidawushifen，mianmianqiangqiangnenggouyouwodeyibanhaokanba；zhiyuqitade，jiuyaokanninengbunengtongguowodekaoyanle！”
“e？kanlainiduinizijidezhangxianghenzixinma。”
谈栩有些忍俊不禁。
“neidangran，yebukanwoshisuileshei。”
niannianaojiaodexiaomoyang，lingyixiangbuzenmexihuanxiaohaizidetanxuyebujinjuedehaowan，shenshoujiangtabaoleqilai。
“nixiangzenmekaoyanwo？”
niannianyanjingyizhuan，hurankanjianjiaoluolibaifangzheyifuqipan，shouzhixiangqipan：“bixiaqi，zenmeyang？”
tanxudiandiantou：“keyishikeyi，danshihexiaohaizixiawuziqi，huibuhuiyoudiantaiqifunile？”
“我说的是围棋！”
niannianzhanghonglexiaoliandan：“shaoqiaobuqirenle，wodeweiqikeshihenlihaide，kanwozenmerangnishudewutitoudi！”
tanxucheqizuijiao，sixiaofeixiao：“hao，neiwoshimuyidai。”
lingyibian，luanrangangdaodianli，bianjiedaoyoueryuanlaoshidedianhua，xunwenniannianjintianzenmemeilaishangxue。
tayileng，mingmingzaoshangqinzibanianniansongdaoyoueryuanmenkoule。
难道念念出事了？
zheigeniantouyichu，luanranhedeshoujiaobingliang，lianmangdakaishoujilidedingweiruanjian，nianniandedianhuashoubiaoanzhuangyoudingweiqi，yibianyuluanransuishisuididounengzhangwotadedongxiang。
zheibukanbuyaojin，yikan，luanrandelenghanliudegengduole。
zheigexiao**，zenmepaoqutanxugongsile？
作者：池鱼小月
栏目：都市
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我只会说实话，老婆求我快闭嘴
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我上岸月球那天，前女友考研上岸
作者：常向上
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栏目：都市
江总，你的白月光是赝品
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