《honghuangcuorenyunxiaobiaomei，shenhuabiaogezhaoni》shiyibuchuanyuezhongshengxiaoshuo，youdouhaihaoadazao。gushizhongdetongtianyunxiaofangmingshenshishenmi，yuqitajiaosezhijianjiugecuozong，yinfaleyixilielingrenpingxidechongtuyutiaozhan。zheibenxiaoshuoqingjiequzhe，jinzhangciji，daijiduzhewujindejingxiyulequ。henxianran，zijizheicishibaifenzhibaibeirenjizaizangxianhaile！yebuzhidaoshinagequededaimaoyande**zhitu，bazheikoutiandadeheiguo，yansihefengdigaidaolezijide……。
gengzhongyaodeshi，zheihaishiyunxiaozijizhudongtichulaide，jianglaiyewurennengshuozijishiyidaqixiao，shiqianglingruo。
lunjixiuwei，tayoujueduidezixin。duifangbuguogangzhanershi，erzijiyijiejinzhansanshidemenjian，shilichajuxianeryijian，shengfujihumeiyouxuannian。
“shimei，ni……dangzhenyaoruci？”
duobaolianshangguzuopingjingdifanwenleyiju，danneixinzaoyilekailehua，fangfoyijingkandaozijizhizhangjiejiaodaquan，haolingqunxiandechangjing。
tabenjiuduitongtianjiangzhengdunjiaowujiaojiyunxiaoxincunbuman。mingmingzijicaishimingzhengyanshundedashixiong，zheidengzhongren，liyingyouzijichengdan，weihepianpianluodaoyunxiaotoushang？zheifenmingshishifupianxin！
rujinyunxiaozhudongtichubidoudingduo，xiangbishitazizhinenglibuzu，nanyifuzhong，caixiangchuzheimegetaijiexiadebanfa，dasuanjiangquanlirangdujiziji。
ng，zheigebanfadaoshibucuo，jibaoquanletadeyanmian，youshunlichengzhangdirangzijishangwei，yijuliangde。
yishijian，duobaoxinzhongduiyunxiaoshenzhihaishengchulejifen“tiliang”he“haogan”。
“ziranshiqianzhenwanque。”
yunxiaolianshangqinzheyimoruoyouruowudedanxiao。duobaoxinzhongneidianxiaojiujiu，taqihuibuzhi？zhenyiweizijishudingleme？
真是天真得可笑！
“jiranruci，neishixiongwobianpeishimeiqiecuojizhao，diandaojizhi。”
“buguo，weixiongbuxiangluogeyidaqixiaodemingsheng，haishishimeinixianchushouba。”
dangzhezheimeduotongmendemian，ruoshizijixiandongshou，nanmianrihoubeirenfeiyi，shuozijishengzhibuwu。
suoyi，tasuoxingdadudirangyunxiaoxiangong，zheiyangjixianfengdu，yenengduzhuyouyouzhongkou。
yunxiaoqueweiweiyaotou，shuodao：“jishiqiecuo，hefenxianhou？shixiongbubirucikeqi。haishishixiongxianqingba？”
kaiwanxiao，zijishenhuaibiaogezengyudexiantianzhibao，lianchanjiaofujiaozhurandengdaorendouyinhendangchang，ququyigeshangweizhansanshideduobao，younengqiangdaonaliqu？takeburenweiduobaodeshilinengchaoyuerandeng。
daihuierxiantianzhibaoyichu，guannishishenmedashixiong，zhaoyangdadenimandizhaoya。
“shimei，wuxuqianrang。shixiongrangnijizhao，yeshiyingdang。nijinguanchushoubianshi。”
duobaomuguangdanrandisaoleyunxiaoyiyan，xinzhonganzipansuan，jiudengzheduifangxianchushou，ranhouzijizaileitingyiji，jiangqijibai，shunlichengzhangdijieguanjiejiaodaquan。
“xing，neishimeiwojiuquezhibugongle。”
huayinluoxia，yunxiaobuzaituici，zhijiequchulefangmingzengyutadeneijianxiaguangwandaodexiantianzhibao——linglongxuanzhu，zhunbeidongshou。
jiranduifangfeiyao“qianrang”，yunxiaoyelandezaiyutakoushejiuchan。
chaneijian，yijianliuguangyicai、shenweineiliandexiantianzhibaochuxianzaiyunxiaoshouzhong，qishangsanfachudekongbuweiyarangzhouweikongjiandouweiweiniuqu。
kandaozheiyimu，zhouweiweiguandejiejiaodizimenshunjianzhakaileguo，yanzhuzidoukuaidengchulaile。
sheiyemeixiangdao，yunxiaojingrannengnachuyijianxiantianzhibao！zheijianbaowushicongheerlai？zhei……zheiwanquanbuhechanglia！
yishijian，jinge、xianmu、yihuodeyilunshengciqibifu。
“wodetian！shenmeqingkuang？yunxiaoshijieta……tanalaidexiantianzhibao？！”
“buzhidaoa！hesiwole！yichushoujiushixiantianzhibao，zheiyetai……taihairenleba！”
“buduia，zheixiantianzhibaoshihelaili？nanbuchengshishifusixiaciyude？”
“si……xiantianzhibaoa！nanguaiyunxiaoshijieruciyoushiwukong，youcidengwushangbaowuzaishou，zheihaizenmeshu？”
raner，budengzhongrencongzhenjingzhongxiaohuazheigexinxi，yunxiaoyijinghanranchushoule。
tashouzhongdelinglongxuanzhubaofachucuicandewucaixiaguang，rutongyikehuapotianjideliuxing，guoxiezhehuimiexingdeliliang，jingzhichaozheduobaodaorenhongjierqu！
xiantianzhibaozhiwei，heqikongbu？lianzhunshengzhongqiderandengdaorendouwufadidangqiyijizhiwei，dangchangbeidadexingshenjumie，genghekuangxiuweishangbururandengdeduobaodaoren？
“娘嘞！”
ganshoudaolinglongxuanzhushangchuanlaideneigulingrenzhixidekongbuqixi，duobaodaorenlianseshunjianbiandecanbai，renbuzhubaolejucukou。tawanghunjiemao，lianmangyejichuzijizuiqiangdefangyufabao——yijianshangpinxiantianlingbao，shitudidang。
zhouweizheimeduoshidishimeikanzheni，zongbunengbuzhanerjiangba？neiyetaidiurenle！
suoyi，jishimingzhizijikenengwanquanbushiduishou，duobaoyijiuxuanzeleyingkang，zuozuihoudezhengzha。
jiusuanshishu，yeyaoshudeyouguqi！genghekuang，taxinzhongchongmanlebiequhebugan。
zheijianzhishizuobi！taikeele！qishawoye！
轰隆！
yishengjingtiandongdidejuxiangchuanlai，liangjianqiangdadefabaozaikongzhongmengliepengzhuang，kongbudenengliangyuborutongkuangtaohailangbanxiangsizhoufengkuangkuosan。
jinjinshidiyicijiaofeng，duobaodaorenbianmingxianganjuedaolejudadeyali，shenxingbeizhendelianlianhoutui，qixuefanteng。
jigehuihezhihou，gaoxialipan，duobaodaorenyiwanquanluoruxiafeng，zhiyouzhaojiazhigong，haowuhaishouzhili。
youguoleshuzhao，yunxiaokanzhunshiji，linglongxuanzhuguangmangdasheng，zaicihenhenzaxia，zhiting“putong”yisheng，duobaodaorenbianrutongduanxiandefengzhengbanbeijifeichuqu，langbeidishuailuozaidi。
yaozhidao，zheilinglongxuanzhunaishineiweibianyibiaogezengyudehushenzhibao，suifeizhugongfa，danyonglaiduifushangweizhansanshideduobao，queshichuochuoyouyu。
genghekuang，guniantongmenqingyi，yunxiaobingweixiasishou，zhishijiangqijibai，bingweishangjiqigenben。
bijingshitongmenqiecuo，diandaoweizhijike，meibiyaozhendepingenisiwohuo。
jiangduobaodafanzaidihou，yunxiaoshouqilinglongxuanzhu，jugaolinxia，yuqipingjingdiwendao：“duobaoshixiong，nikefuqi？”
zairucizhongmukuikuizhixia，yanmianjinshi，xiangzijihaodaiyeshijiejiaoshoutu，duobaozenkenengruciqingyiditourenshu？
kuangqie，tashixiangenbenbuzhidaoduifangjingranyongyourucinitiandexiantianzhibao，zheirangtaruhefuqi？tabiequdechadianyikoulaoxuepenchulai。
“我不服！”
duobaoyinchenzhelian，yaoyaqiechidicongdishangpaqilai，xinzhongyumendekuaiyaobaozha。zheitaniangdeyetaibugongpingle！
ninazhexiantianzhibaolaiqifuwo，dawanlehaiwenwofubufuqi？younizheimeqifurendema？
wuwuwu……zheiweiqusheishoudelea！
“行！”
yunxiaogancuililuodiyidiantou，meiyousihaofeihua。
suihou，zaisuoyouweiguandizichengmujieshedezhushixia，tashenyingyihuang，zaiciqishenershang，duizheganggangpaqilaideduobao，youshiyidunhaobuliuqingde“wulishuofu”。
quanjiaoxiangjia，suiranmeiyoudongyongfabao，danzhunshengdeliliangyefeitongxiaoke，dadeduobaocanjiaolianlian，haowuhaishouzhili。
“zheixiazi，nikefuqile？”
yunxiaoshuaileshuaiyouxiefamadeshouwan，sihudadeyeyouxieleile。
tatingxiashou，kanzhedishangyijingbiqinglianzhong、yishanlanlvdeduobao，zaiciwendao。
“wo……wobufu！wojiushibufu！pingshenme？！”
duobaoyilianyuandudidengzheyunxiao，shuohuashiqiandonglelianshangdeshangkou，tengdetaziyaliezui。raoshiyitazhunshengderoushen，yeganjuehunshenjutong。
实在是太疼了！
zheijiahuo，jianzhibushiren！
yongxiantianzhibaoqifurenyejiubale，dawanzhihouhaizhuizhewennifubufu！
靠！
不带这么羞辱人的！
zheishanghaixinghuoxubusuanzhiming，danzheiwuruxingjianzhishilamanle！
dangxia，duobaoweiqudeyanleidoukuaidiaoxialaile。
“haibufuqi？neihaoban！”
yunxiaozaicidiantou，bufu？neijiujixuda，dadaonifuweizhi。
zheikeshibiaogeqinchuandemiaofa，jueduiguanyong。
dangxia，yunxiaohaobuyouyu，zaicichongleshangqu，duizhedishangdeduobaoyoushiyidunkuangfengbaoyubanderoulin，xiashouneijiaoyigeganjingliluo。
“啊——！”
yishengqilizhijidecanjiaoxiangcheyunxiao，duobaozhongyushikangbuzhuzheibanzhemo，fachuletongkudesihao。
zheinima，jianzhishicanwurendaoa！haiyoumeiyoutianli？haiyoumeiyouwangfale？
kanzheyanqianzheilingrentoupifamadeyimu，zhouweiweiguandejiejiaodizimenhedexiabadoukuaidiaodishangle，xuduorenxiayishidibaojinleziji，shengpaxiayigejiushiziji。
taixiongcanle！jianzhishitaixiongcanle！
“nianglei！zhei…zheihaishiwoyiqianrenshideneigewenwanxianjingdeyunxiaoshijiema？zheiyetai…taikuangbaoleba？”
“haokepaa！hedewotuidouruanle！turanyoudianxintengduobaoshixiongle……”
“haojiahuo！wozhijiejiushiyigehaojiahuo！yunxiaoshijieshenmeshihoubiandezheimeshafaguoduanle？yiyanbuhezhijiekaigan？”
“baqi！yunxiaoshijieshizaishitaibaqile！xingkuiwogangcaimeiyoubiaoxianchubufuqi，buranxiachangkendingbiduobaoshixionghaican！”
“ai，keliandeduobaoshixionga！zaojiugentashuoguo，nvren，youqishipiaoliangdenvren，shibuhaorede，tapianbuxin，zheixiahaoleba……”
……
suoyoudejiejiaodizidouyongyizhonghunhezhekongjuhetongqingdemuguangkanzhedishangyanyanyixideduobao。zhiqianneixiexinzhonghaicunyoujifenbufuqidedizi，cikezaoyibeihedejinruohanchan，liandaqidoubuganchuanyixia。
zheinimasheihaiganshuoge“bu”zi？
meiguanxi，dayidunjiuhaole。yidunbuxing？neijiuliangdun、sandun……yizhidadaonichedishiqufankangdeyongqi，ziranjiufuqile。
“zhei……ermeita……taheshibianderuci……ng，guojuele？zheidangzhenshiwomenrenshideneigeermeima？”
zhaogongminglianshangyeluchulenanyizhixindebiaoqing，kanzheneibianrutongnvzhanshenyibanweifenglinlindeyunxiao，shizaiwufajiangyanqianzhirenyuguoquneigetiandanwenhedemeimeilianxiqilai。
zheidaodishizenmehuishi？zijiaermeiweihehuituranzhijianxingqingdabian？
dangranle，zheijueduishiyijian……dakuairenxindehaoshi！
“buzhidaoa！zongganjuezheihuafengtubian，butaixiangdajieyiguandexingshifengge。buguo……kandajiechushou，zoudeduobaoneijiahuoaoaojiao，zhenshikandewotaishuangle！jieqi！shizaishitaijieqile！”
qiongxiaorenbuzhutiaoletiaoxiumei，zuijiaoqinzhexiaoyishuodao。tayizhijuedezijiadajiexinggetaiguoyushiwuzheng，fanerrongyishourenqifu。
zhengshiyinweiyunxiaopiqihao，neigeduobaocaiganyierzai、zaiersanditiaoxin，guyiweinantamen。rujinyunxiaozheibanqiangying，jueduishirangrenpaishouchengkuai。
“hahaha！dajieweiwu！zaojiugaizheiyangle！yaoshizaodianzheimegan，taduobaoqiganrucixiaozhangbahu？”
bixiaoyelianliandiantou，duiyunxiaoxianzaidezuofabiaoshiyibaigezancheng。tamendangchuzhuzhangfangqizhengdunjiaowu，bushipashi，ershiyinweitamenqueshidabuguoduobao。
xianzaiyunxiaoshouwoxiantianzhibaozheidengdashaqi，neihaipashenme？dajiuwanshile！
nandaobudongshou，jiuyizhiyaobeiduifangyazheqifuma？
jiuzaizhongrenxinsigeyi，yilunfenfenzhiji，yunxiaopailepaishouzhang，ranhouyizhiyuzuqingqingdicaizaileduobaodexiongkoushang。
cikededuobao，yijingrutongsigouyibantanruanzaidi，hunshenqingyikuaiziyikuai，lianshanggengshizhongdexiangzhutou，bumanleyuqing，zuijiaohaiguazhexuesi，lianshangshiciyaliezuidetongkubiaoqing。xiangzheiyangdeshangshi，tashenshangzhishaohaiyoushijichu。
“xianzai，nikefuqile？”
yunxiaozaicikaikou，yuqipingdan，danyanshenzhongquedaizheburongzhiyideweiyan，bingqieyijingananzuohaolezaicidongshoudezhunbei。
zhiyaocongduobaozuilitingdaobange“bu”zi，tajiuhuilikejixu“jiangdaoli”，nengdongshoujiejuedeshiqing，juebuduobibi，zhidaoduifangchedixinfukoufuweizhi。
“fu！wofu！wozhendefule！gunainairaominga！”
kanzheyunxiaoneizaicitaiqide、fangfoyunhanzhewuqiongliliangdequantou，duobaohedehunfeiposan，yanleibitidouliuchulaile，neifumoyang，jianzhishiwenzheshangxin，jianzheluolei，bietiyouduomeqicankelianle。
younizheimewenhuadema？yiyanbuhejiukaida，dawanlehaicaizherenwenfubufu？zanmenjiubunengzuoxialaihaohaotantanma？
taicanbaole！guoran，nvrenshibunengyongchanglilaichuaidude，gentamenjiangdaoli，xiachangyidinghuifeichangbeican！
“xing，jiranfuqile，neiwojiubudale。”
yunxiaomanyididiandiantou，zheicaishouhuileyuzu，haozhengyixiadizhandaoleyipang。
jiejueleduobaozheigezuidadecitouzhihou，yunxiaozhuanguoshen，muguangsaoguoshenhoujinruohanchandeyizhongjiejiaomenren，yuqiyijiudanran，quedaizheyiguburongkangjudeweishi：“haiyousheixinlibufuqide，xianzaikeyizhanchulai。jintianwoyibingshoushile，yeshengderihoumafan，woaigedongshou。”
娘嘞！
xianzaisheihaiganshuobangebuzi？zhaosiyebushizheimezhaode！
dangxia，jiejiaodezhongrenrutongxiaojizhuomiban，zhengxiankonghou、zhanzhanjingjingdikaikoubiaotai。
“fu！yunxiaoshijie，womenshizhendefule！xinfukoufu！”
“duiduidui！womenkoufuxinfu，wutitoudidoufuqi！”
“fufufu！womenjueduifuqi！yihouyunxiaoshijieninshuoshajiushisha，ninzhidongwomenjuebuwangxi！”
“shuodetaiduile！wokezhenshitaifuqile！womenquanjiashangxiadoufuqidebuxing！”
……
kanzhezhongrenquandouyifufushoutieer、bigongbijingdeshuncongmoyang，yunxiaodezuijiaogouqiyimomanyidehudu，xinzhonganzishuchang。
kanlai，biaogejiaodefangfaguoranshijiandancubaodanxiaoguobaqun！zhenshitaihaoyongle！guoranzhiyaodashangyidun，jiuquandoulaoshitinghuale。
suhuashuo，qinzeixianqinwang。yizhiyilaidoushiduobaozheijiahuozaianzhongshanfengdianhuo，tiaobolijian。rujindangzhezheimeduorendemian，zijijiangtahenhendishoushileyidun，shajijinghou，xiangbizheijiahuoyihouyebuganzaiqingyizhacile。
yucitongshi，yuanzaibiyougongshenchu。
tongtianjiaozhuyijingshimantouheixian，zuijiaoweiweichouchu。zhei……zheihaishizijineigepingshiguaiqiaodongshi、wenwankerendetudiyunxiaoma？
dangran，tayongjiaozhitouxiangyezhidao，ruofeibeihouyourenzhidiansongyong，zijineigeyixiangxunguidaojudetuer，juebukenengturanbianderuci……biaohan。
henxianran，zheijianshiqing，jueduiyoushiyunxiaoneigeshenmimocedebianyibiaogechude“haozhuyi”。
buguo，jibianshifangmingjiaode，younengruheni？tatongtianganquduozuima？ganquchashouma？daanshi——kendingbugana！
wanyizijizhendepaoquganyu，zhibudingdaoshihourenjianeiwei“biaoge”yaoqinzishangmenlai，bazijianzaidishangmoca。
zheiyaoshidangzhejiejiaozheimeduodizidemianfasheng，zijizheizhangshengrenlaolian，haiyaobuyaole？
xiangxiangneigehuamian，tongtianjiujuedebuhanerli！
suanlesuanle，youtamenquba。zheiyangyehao，fanergengyouliyuyunxiaokuaidaozhanluanma，xunsuzhengdunhaojiejiaodezhixu。
dangran，zuizuizhongyaodeyidianshi，tongtiangenbenjiubuganduiciyourenheyiyi。
yichanghanchanglinlide“wulishuofu”zhihou，jiejiaoneibuzuizhuyaodemaodunsuanshizanshidedaolejiejue。
bijing，zheicifengbodeshizuoyongzhejiushiduobaodaoren。zhiyaojiangtazheigedaitoudagejichedidafule，qitadedizimenziranyejiubuganzaiyouerhuale。
kaishenmewanxiao？lianshilizuiqiangdedashixiongduobaodoubeiyunxiaoshijiedadehaowuhaishouzhili，gensigouyiyang，genghekuangshitamenzheixiexiuweigengdidedizini？
jibianxinlizhendehaiyouneimeyisisibufuqi，neiyezhiganbiezaixinli，sheihaiganshahuhudizhanchulaizhaozou？
budebuchengren，biaogejiaodezheigefangfa，suiranjiandancubao，danjianzhishitaiguanyongle！
zhenshilvshibushuang，xiaoguoxianzhua！
海贼：都成路飞了我还当什么海贼王，女帝不香吗？
作者：八旬老贼
栏目：古代
作者：东方恶狼
栏目：古代
zuozhe：aichixiangbolvchadeniudingtian
栏目：古代
出马仙妻：这回，你的命我不救
作者：鑫淇
栏目：古代
穿成恶毒女配后，我靠咸鱼躺赢成团宠！
作者：泡芙和可乐
栏目：古代
作者：十里俊后生
栏目：古代
