假死归来，我直播亲爹妈的葬礼顾小妖精-著

小说简介

zuozhe“guxiaoyaojing”chuangzuodeduanpianyanqingwen《jiasiguilai，wozhiboqindiemadezangli》，shuzhongdezhuyaojiaosefenbieshishenzhenbangsuqingguyanzhi，xiangxineirongjieshao：】【shenzongdoudianmingpipingnile，haibuganjindaoqian？】womeiyoulihuizheixie。wozhishijingjingdikanzhejingtou，kanzhepingmushanggundongdemeiyigezi。ranhou，wohuanhuankaikou……

精彩章节

shoufubamabawoedaotouchidejiankong，jiancheng“fujianvtouqie”quanwangzhibo。yiyejian，

wochenglerenrenhandadehaomenchiru。woxiaozhetunxiazhengpingweishengsu，

zaijiuhucheshangjizijiyuyuelezuihaodehuozangsiyi。tamenduizhewodeshitizhibokusang，kusunverbuxiao，

yanjikanbiyingdiyinghou。erwo，zhengyongxinshenfenzuozaiwangba，kanzhezhibojianbaozhangdedashang，

yiziyijuqiaoxiawodefuchoujihuashu。1gaosanzheinian，wokuaiesile。woquansuozaidixiashibinglengchaoshidechuangshang，

tingzheloushangchuanlaidaochapengzhuangdeqingcuishengxiang。neishiwodefumu，shoufushenzhenbanghecishanjiasuqing，

zhengzaixiangyongtamendefashiwancan。erwo，shitamencuozhejiaoyuxiazuiwanmeideshiyanpin。“xingwan，chidekuzhongku，

fangweirenshangren。”“womenjiabuyangfeiwu，nibixucongxiaojiudongdezhenxi。

”tamenzuishangguazhezuiguanmiantanghuangdeliyou，quebaworengzaimeiyouchuanghudedixiashi，meitianzhijiyiduncangenglengfan。

meiqimingyue，yikusitian。jieganxiangyizhiwuxingdeshou，sisiezhuwodehoulong。wozaiyerenbuzhule。

woguangzhejiao，xiangyizhilaoshu，qiaowushengxidiliushangleyiloudechufang。heianzhong，womodaoleyikuaigeyedemianbao，

youlengyouying。wobuguanbugudisaijinzuili，cucaodemaifuhuapolewodekouqiang，

kewozhijuedeneishiwushangdemeiwei。jiuzaiwolangtunhuyanshi，chufangdedengpadiyishengliangle。

wobashenzhenbangzhanzaimenkou，shenhougenzhewomasuqing。tameiyoufennu，meiyoudama，

lianshangshenzhidaizheyisiguiyideweixiao。“zhuadaole。”tajuqishouji，pingmushangzhengshiwotouchimianbaodehuamian，

gegejiaodu，wubiqingxi。womasuqingzouguolai，jugaolinxiadikanzhewo，yuqilimanshishiwang。“xingwan，

nizenmenengtoudongxi？womenshenjiadeliandoubeinidiujinle。”wokanzhetashenshangjiazhiliuweishudexiangnaiertaozhuang，

zaikankanzijishenshangxidaofabaidejiuxiaofu，zhijuedehuangtang。woedaotouyikuaimianbao，shidiulian。

tamenjinyiyushi，quexinanlide。shenzhenbangshouqishouji，pailepaiwodetou，

dongzuoqingroudexiangshizaianfuyizhichongwu。“biepa，babahuibangnigaizhengde。

”wodangshibudongtasuoweidegaizhengshishenmeyisi。zhidaodiertian，

quanwangresoudiyidecitiaoshi：“shoufunvershixiaotou”dianjinqu，shiwozuowantouchimianbaodejiankongshipin，

beijingxinjianjiguo。peishangdewenanshishenzhenbangdeqinbizhangwen：《jiamenbuxing，nvertouqiechengxing，

yigefuqindeqixuefansi》。yiyezhijian，wochenglehaomenzuidadechiru，

yigebeichonghuailehaibuzhizu、shenzhilunluodaotouqiedeguaiwu。xuexiaodetiebali，

wodezhaopianbeipchenglegezhongbukanrumudebiaoqingbao。“zhenexin，youqianrenjiadehaizihaitoudongxi。

”“kendingshijiajiaobuxing，fumuyebushishenmehaodongxiba。”“loushangde，renjiabashishoufu，mashicishanjia，

zenmekenengbuxing？jiushitazijijian！”wobeixuexiaolelingtuixue。womasuqingzuozaishafashang，

yibianyouyadixiujianzhezhijia，yibiantanqi。“xingwan，nikan，zheijiushinifancuodedaijia。womenshiweilenihao，

rangnijizhuzheigejiaoxun。”shenzhenbangzezaipangbianjiedianhua，yuqixingfen。“dui，gujiayouxiaofubodong，

danshiwodegerenxingxiangsuzaodefeichangchenggong！yigetongxinjishouyouyuanyiweilejiaoyunverbuxizijiejiachoudeyanfu！

gongguanbushuoxiaoguofeichanghao！”wozhanzaitamenmianqian，xiangyigetoumingdeyouling。yuanlai，wodetongku，

shitamendexunzhang。wodeshesi，shitamendeshangji。woxiaole。huidaodixiashi，wofansuolemen，

nachuzaojiuzhunbeihaodeyizhengpinggaonongduweishengsuc。jirannimenzheimexihuankanwoshoujiaoxun。

neiwojiujinimenyichang，zuida、yezuinanwangdejiaoxun。wopingjingdiningkaipinggai，jiangyibaiduopianbaisedeyaopian，

jinshutunlexiaqu。2.weibuchuanlaijuliedejiaotong，yishimohuqian，wobotongle120。ranhou，

woyonglingyibuzaojiuzanghaodeyicixingshouji，fachulezheibeizizuizhongyaodeyitiaoduanxin。

shouxinrenshiwodeyuanfangbiaojiu，linyisheng。tashijiazuliweiyiyigebeizhuliupaijizaiwai，

queyeweiyiyigejiguowoshanyideren。duanxinneironghenjiandan：“jiujiu，jiuwo。

”jiuhuchedemingdishengyouyuanjijin。wojiadebaomujianjiaozhezhuangkaimen，ranhoushishenzhenbanghesuqingguzuojinghuangdelian。

“xingwan！nizenmezheimesha！”“kuai！kuaisongyiyuan！wodenveryaoshiyougesanzhangliangduan，woyebuhuole！

”suqingkuhanzhe，quezaiwobeitaishangdanjiashi，buzhehenjidituihouleyibu，

shengpawoshenshangdeoutuwunongzangletaangguidequnzi。zaicixinglai，shizaiyiyuantaipingjiandetingshichuangshang。

binglengcigu。biaojiulinyishengzhanzaiwopangbian，tuoxialebaidagua，lianshangdaizheyisipibeiheburen。“chengle。

wozhaoleyijugangsonglai、wurenrenlingdenvshihuanleni。siwangzhengmingyekaihaole，jixingyaowuzhongdu，qiangjiuwuxiao。

”wozuoqishen，huodongleyixiajiangyingdesizhi。“tamenni？”“zaiwaimian，dengzhekaifabuhui。

”linyishenglengxiaoyisheng，“nidefumu，zhenshitianshengdeyanyuan。”tadijiwoyigebeibao。

limianshiyitaomoshengdeyifu，yizhangxindeshenfenzheng，heyitaxianjin。“shenfenzhengshangdemingzijiaolinchaoxi。

qidongzijinbuduo，shengzhedianhua。yihou，shenxingwanyijingsile。”wojieguobeibao，shenshendikanletayiyan。

“jiujiu，zheifenenqing，wojiyibeizi。”“bieshuozheixie。”tabaibaishou，yankuangyouxiefahong，

“dangnianyaobushinitoutousaijiwomayibiqian，tayeaobuguoneichangdabing。womenlinjia，

zaojiubeishenzhenbangneiqunrencaijinnilile。wobangni，yeshizaibangwoziji。”tadunledun，shengyinyadegengdi。

“chaoxi，dayingwo，haohaohuozhe。huochugerenyanglai，baneixierendelian，quandoudazhong。”wozhongzhongdiantou。

congtaipingjiandehoumenlikaishi，woluguoleyiyuandefabuhuixianchang。shanguangdengxiangbaizhouyiyangciyan。

wodefuqinshenzhenbang，zhanzaitaiqian，mianrongqiaocui，shuangyantonghong。“shiwo……shiwozheigezuofuqindeshibai！

woyiweiyanlidejiaoyunengrangtachengcai，meixiangdao……quebatabishanglejuelu！”tagengyanzhe，jihushuobuxiaqu。

womasuqingshishididishangyibeishui，zijiyekudelihuadaiyu。“xingwanshigehaohaizi，shiwangluobaolihaileta！

neixiemataderen，doushixiongshou！”tamenyichangyihe，jiangyigeweinvxinsuidefumuxingxiang，yanyidelinlijinzhi。

taixiadejizhewubuweizhidongrong。erwo，jiuzhanzairenqundeyinyingli，lenglengdikanzhezheiyiqie。zhenshiyichanghaoxi。

kexi，guanzhongli，shaolewozheigezhujiao。bu，huoxuwoconglaidoubushizhujiao。wozhishitamenyonglaiboquminglide，

yijiandaoju。yijianxianzaiyijingbaofei，danrengyouzuihouliyongjiazhidedaoju。wozhuanshen，

haobuliuliandizoujinleyesezhong。shenxingwanyijingsile。huoxialaideshilinchaoxi。yigezhiweifuchouershengde，

youling。3.zanglibandejiqishengda。shenzhenbangbaoxialequanshizuiguidebinyiguan，xianhuacongmenkoupudaolelitang。

tajujuelesuoyoudianyi，quekaiqilequanwangzhibo。zhibojiandebiaotishi：《yigexinsuifuqindegaobie》。

wozuozailingyizuochengshi，yijiacaozadewangbali，pingmushangshiwoneizhangheibaisedeyizhao。zhaopianshangdewo，

xiaodetianzhenlanman。neishiwoshisuishengrishipaide，yeshiwojiyili，weiyiyicichidaoshengridangao。zhibojianli，

shenzhenbangyishenheisexizhuang，xingrongkugao。taduizhejingtou，huanhuanjiangshuzhewodebuxiaoyucuiruo。“wochengren，

woduitadejiaoyufangshiyouxieyanke。dannayoufumubuwangzichenglongde？worangtazhudixiashi，

shixiangrangtayikusitian，zhidaojintiandeshenghuolaizhibuyi。”“wogongbutatouqiedeshipin，

shixiangrangtazhichierhouyong！meixiangdao，tadexinlizheimecuiruo，

jingran……jingranyongzheizhongfangshilaibaofuwomen……”suqingzaiyipangqibuchengsheng，jihuyunjueguoqu。

“wodenvera……mamacuole……mamabugaiduinineimeyange……nihuilaihaobuhao……”danmushang，

manshitongqingheanwei。【shenzongjieai，nimeiyoucuo，cuodeshizheigecuiruodeshidai。

】【xianzaidehaizitainanguanle，shuobudemabude。】【suqingnvshihaokelian，doukuchengzheiyangle。

】【zhiyouwoyigerenjuede，banveredaotoudongxidefumuhenqipama？】zheitiaozhiyidedanmu，

shunjianbeiwushudemanmayanmei。【loushangshengmugunchuqu！renjiayijingshiqunverle，nihaizaizheilishuofenglianghua！

】【jianpanxiazhenexin，chirenxuemantou！】zhibojiandedashangkaishifengzhang。huojian、jianianhua，

yigejieyigedishuaping。shenzhenbangyibianbeitongyujue，yibiankanzhezhulidiguolaideshouji，

zuijiaoyizhibuzhudiweiweishangyang。gongsigujia，yinweizheichangchenggongdeweijigongguan，bujiangfansheng。zhibodashang，

duanduanyixiaoshi，yijingtupoleqianwan。tamenyongwodeshiti，chidepenmanboman。woguandiaozhibo，

mianwubiaoqingdidakaiyigewendang。wendangdebiaotishi：《fuchoujihuashu》。diyibu：jinchantuoqiao，renjianzhengfa。

（yiwancheng）dierbu：renrufuzhong，kaoquzhuangyuan。woqiaoxiazheixingzi，ranhouqishen，likailewangba。

wozaizheigemoshengdechengshi，zuxialeyijianzuibianyidedixiashi。heshenjiadeneigeyiyang，yinan，chaoshi，

meiyouyangguang。wobabiaojiujiwodeqidongzijin，dabufendouyonglaimailegaosan**defuxiziliao。shengxiadeqian，

zhigouwomeitianchilianggemantou。danwoyidianyebujuedeku。yinweimeiyicijie，meiyicihanleng，meiyicigudu，

douzaitixingwo。woshilinchaoxi。wobeifuzheshenxingwandexuehaishenchou。

wokanzheqiangshangtiezhedeneizhangshenzhenbanghesuqingzaizanglishangbeitongdezhaopian，bameiyifenhenyi，doukejinleshubenli。

womeitianzhishuisigexiaoshi。kunle，jiuyonglengshuipolian。ele，jiubeilianggeyingyudanci。neixiefuzadegongshi，

aokoudeguwen，duiwolaishuo，buzaishizhishi。tamenshizidan。shiwoshexiangwoneiduiyingdiyinghoufumude，

fuchoudezidan。zheiyinian，tamenkaozheyanfucimuderenshe，chenglequanguowenmingdejiaoyudianfan。erwo，

chengleyigezhiweifuchouerhuodeyouling。gaokaoneitian，wopingjingdizoujinkaochang。bijianhuaguoshijuan，

fachushashadeshengxiang。neibushizaidati。neishizai，weishenzhenbanghesuqing，shuxiefugao。

4.gaokaochengjigongbuneitian，woyiyemeishui。bushijinzhang，ershixingfen。

yizhonglierenjijiangkandaoliewuluoruxianjingdexingfen。lingchen，chafentongdaokaifang。woshuruzhunkaozhenghao，

zhijianweiweizhandou。pingmushangtiaochuyixingxianhongdeshuzi。yuwen145，shuxue150，yingyu148，

lizong300。zongfen：743。wochenglezheigesheng，shinianyilaifenshuzuigaodelikezhuangyuan。

jihushitongyishijian，wodeshoujibeidabaole。qinghua、beidadezhaoshengbanlaoshi，gedameitidejizhe，

dianhuayigejieyige。“shilinchaoxitongxuema？woshiqinghuadaxuezhaoshengbande，women……”“lintongxuenihao！

woshishengdianshitaidejizhe，qingwenkeyiduininjinxingyigedujiazhuanfangma？”woguaduanyige，youxiangqiyige。

zuihou，**cuiguanleji。wozaidixiashili，jingjingdizuoleyizhengtian。wozaideng。dengyigezuihaodeshiji。

santianhou，guanyushenmizhuangyuanlinchaoxidetaolun，zaiwangluoshangdadaoledingfeng。suoyourendouhaoqi，

zheigejujuelesuoyoumingxiaohemeitidenvhai，jiujingshishei。jiuzaizheishi，woyongxinzhucedeshejiaozhanghao，

fabulediyitiaodongtai。yizhangzhiboyugaohaibao。haibaodebeijing，shiyipianranshaodehuijin。

shangmianyongxuehongsedezitixiezheyixingzi：“yifenlaizisizhedeyishu。”zhiboshijian：jinwanbadian。

zheitiaodongtai，xiangyikeshenshuizhadan，shunjianyinbaolequanwang。“sizhedeyishu？shenmeyisi？chaozuoba？

”“zheigelinchaoxishisheia？zheimekuang？”“zhuangyuangaozhibo？xiangdangwanghongxiangfengle？”zhiyishengzhong，

wodefumuyezhuyidaolezheitiaodongtai。shenzhenbangzaitadegerenzhanghaoshangzhuanfale，bingpeiwen：“xianzaidenianqingren，

weileboyanqiu，zhenshiwusuobuyongqiji。zhuangyuanyouruhe？meiyourenpin，zhongjiushikongzhonglouge。kebei，ketan。

”tazaiyicizhanzailedaodedezhigaodianshang，banyanzheyouguoyoumindeqiyejia。

suqingyefuchangfusui：“zhentizheigehaizidefumugandaobeiai。”tamenyongyuanbuhuixiangdao。

tamenkouzhongneigemeiyourenpindezhuangyuan，neigerangtamengandaobeiaidehaizi。jiushitamenqinshoumaizangdenver。

wanshangbadian，wozhunshikaiqilezhibo。meiyoumeiyan，meiyoulvjing。wosumianchaotiandizuozaijingtouqian，

beijingshiyimianbaideciyandeqiang。zhibojianderenshu，zaiduanduanjifenzhongnei，jiutupoleqianwan。danmushang，

chongmanlehaoqihechaofeng。【gaoshenmegui？yishuni？】【zhubozhangdehaixing，jiushinaozibutaihao。

】【shenzongdoudianmingpipingnile，haibuganjindaoqian？】womeiyoulihuizheixie。wozhishijingjingdikanzhejingtou，

kanzhepingmushanggundongdemeiyigezi。ranhou，wohuanhuankaikou。shengyinbuda，

queqingxidichuandaolemeiyigerendeerduoli。“dajiahao。”“wojiaoshenxingwan。”5quanwangzhalie。

zhibojiandedanmu，zaijingzhileguiyidesanmiaohou，shunjianbaozha。【？？？？？wotingcuoleshenme？

】【shenxingwan？neigezishadeshoufunver？】【kaishenmeguojiwanxiao！rensilehainengzhibo？

】【zhubofengleba！weilehongliansirendouganmaochong？】【@wangjing，zheiliyourensanboyaoyan，jianyifengsha！

】womeiyoujitamentaiduofanyingdeshijian。woanxialebofangjian。yiduanyinpin，congwoshenhoudeyinxianglichuanlechulai。

neishiwozaizanglizhiboshi，qiaoqiaoluxiade。beijingyinshiaile，hesuqingsixinliefeidekuhan。

danjiazazaiqizhongde，shishenzhenbangyadileshengyin、queyanshibuzhuxingfendeduihua。“……dashangpoliangqianwanle！

zhenbang，womendegongguancelvetaichenggongle！”zheishisuqingdeshengyin。“didiaodian！haizaizhiboni！dengjieshule，

wojinimaizuixinkuandeaimashi！”zheishishenzhenbangdeshengyin。“taoyan……duile，gongsigujiazenmeyang？

”“zhangtingle！dengzheizhenfengtouguoqu，wozaixuanbuchengliyigexingwanfangyiyujijinhui，

younengshougeyibomingshenghejiucai……”yinpinjieshu。zhenggezhibojian，yipiansiji。

gangganghaizaijiaoxiaozherangwodaoqiandewangyou，quandouchenmole。wotaiqiyan，kanxiangjingtou，

shengyinpingjingdemeiyouyisibolan。“wodefumu，zaiwodezanglishang，shuzhewodesiwanghuanlaideqian。”“xianzai，

nimenhaijuede，woshimaochongdema？”womeiyoujirenherenchuanxidejihui，jinjiezhefangchuledierfenzhengju。

neishiyiduanjiankongluxiang。shiwoheijinleshenjiabieshudeanbaoxitong，zhaodaodechennianjiudang。huamianli，shisuidewo，

yinweikaoshimeinadaodiyiming，beishenzhenbangyongtengtiaochoudepikairouzhan。suqingjiuzhanzaipangbian，lengmodikanzhe。

“dadehao，buzhangjixingdedongxi。”“rangnikaodier，xiacishibushijiuyaokaodaoshudiyile？

”woyibianbofangshipin，yibianhuanhuanjuanqizijideyixiu。shoubeishang，chenniandeshangbazonghengjiaocuo，

xiangyitiaotiaochouloudewugong。“tamenshuo，zheishiweilewohao。”“tamenshuo，zheishicuozhejiaoyu。

”wofangxiayixiu，younachuyitahouhoudebingli。“shiersui，zhangqiyingyangbuliangdaozhiweichuankong，zhuyuanbangeyue。

”“shisansui，beiguanzaidixiashifagaoshao，chadiandelefeiyan。”“shiwusui，

yinweinonghuailesuqingdeyijianshoushi，beifaguizaixuedilisangexiaoshi，shuangtuiyanzhongdongshang。”……meiyizhangbingli，

doushiyidaoxuelinlindeshangkou。meiyifenjilu，doushiyiciwushengdekongsu。zhibojiandedanmu，yijingcongzhenjing，

bianchenglefennu。【chusheng！zheitamashirengandeshima？！】【wotule，zhiqianhaitongqingtamen，

wozhenshixialeyan！】【shenzhenbang！suqing！gunchulaishousi！】【meimeitaicanle，baobaomeimei。】womeiyouku。

congwotunxianeipingweishengsukaishi，wodeyanlei，jiuyijingliuganle。wonachulezuihouyiyangdongxi。

yizhangshishengzhuangyuandechengjidan，yizhangshibeidadeluqutongzhishu。shangmiandemingzi，shilinchaoxi。

danwojuqilewodexinshenfenzheng，heyizhangwoyubiaojiudeheying。“ganxiewodejiujiu，jilewodiercishengming。

ganxiewosiqudeziji，jilewofuchoudeyongqi。”wozhishizhejingtou，yiziyiju，qingxiwubi。

“shenzhenbangxiansheng，suqingnvshi。”“nimensuoweidecuozhejiaoyu，zhijiaohuilewoyijianshi。”“ruhe，

qinshouweinimenjubanyichang，shengdade，shehuixingsiwangzangli。”6wodezhibohaimeijieshu，shenjiadetian，

yijingtale。zhibojiandehuamianli，nengkandaowushuwangyouzifadichongxiangleshenjiabieshu。tamenjuzhehengfu，

gaohanzheyanchengnvetongemo。jidan、lancaiye，xiangyudianyiyangzaxiangneidongcengjingxiangzhengzhecaifuhediweidehaozhai。

jihushitongshi，jiliangyinzheshuiwu、gonganziyangdeche，huxiaozhetingzaileshenjiamenkou。

shenzhenbanghesuqingbeidaichulaideshihou，lianshanghaidaizhecanjiaqinggongyandeweixun。

dangtamenkandaomenkouheiyayaderenqun，heneixiebinglengdeshoukaoshi，chedimengle。“nimenganshenme！

nimenzhidaowoshisheima！”shenzhenbanghaizaijiaoxiao。suqingzehuarongshise，jianjiaozheduobizhefeilaidezawu。

danmeiyourenlihuitamen。cengjingbeitamencaizaijiaoxiadedazhong，cike，chengleshenpantamendefaguan。wodezhibo，

chenglechengtangzhenggong。shenshijituandegujia，zaikaipanhoudeyifenzhongnei，zhijiedieting。wushuguminxuebenwugui，

zaiwangshangzuchengleshenshishouhaizhelianmeng，yaoqiushenzhenbangpeichangtamendesuoyousunshi。suqingdecishanjiarenshe，

yechedibengta。tamingxiadecishanjijinhuibeichachucunzaidaliangzhangmubuqing、nuoyongshankuandewenti。

neixiecengjingbeitazizhuguo、bingbeitalazhedaochuzuoxiudehaizimen，yefenfenzhanchulai，