搅屎棍里的帝王绿乐意吃西红柿-著

小说简介

yedongzhouxiaofangshixiaoshuo《jiaoshigunlidediwanglv》zhongshejidaodelinghunrenwu，jinqizaiwangluoshangfeichanghuobao，zuozhe“leyichixihongshi”zhengzaijinluomigugengxinhouxuzhong，gaishuwei：”yedongbigongbijingdidishangganyanggun，shouxindehanshuizaoyibagunbingyinshi。zhenglaosanzhouzhemeitou，niezhebizisuiyidifanlefangunzi：“zaomude，kanzheyoujishiniande……

精彩章节

zhongsheng1998，jiaoshigunlitaochudiwanglv1998niandeshendong，

wanbeinongcundefenglinliederutongfenglidedaoren，siyidigezherenmendelianjia。yedongzaicaoduozhongmengdijingxing，

houjingchuhainianzhexiexucaoxie，tazhijuedehoulonggankedefangfoyaoranshaoqilai，ernaohailiqueruzaoleiji，

qianshineixiebukanhuishoudeguowang，xiangzhakaileguoyibanqingxidifuxianzaiyanqian。

taxiangqizijizhengrixujiu、chenmidubo，jianglaopozhouxiaofangxinkujizanxialaidepeijiaqianshudeyiganerjing。

weilechanghaiduzhai，tajinghenxinbipoxiaofangqugongchangjiesihuo，jieguoquefashengleyiwai，nvgongyoucaozuoshiwu，

xiaofangdeyoushoushengshengbeijiqijiaoduan。neiqilidecanjiaofangfohaizaierbianhuidang，yedongdexinyizhenjiutong。

erzhaizhudumendeneitian，taqueduozaixiangkou，hedelanzuiruni，yanzhengzhengkanzhexiaofangbeiwuqingdituoshangmianbaoche。

zaicijiandaotashi，zhiyouyijulengbingbingdeshiti。“ou——”yedongbaozhelubiandeshu，fengkuangdioutuqilai，

weisuanzhuoshaozhesangziyan，keneixindetongkuyuanyuanchaoguoleshentidebushi。tazenmeyemeixiangdao，zuisijietouhou，

laotianyejingranjiletayicizhongshengdejihui。yedonghunhuneedizoudaocunkou，zhijianyangquanli，

wangtufuzhenghuiwuzheganyanggun，duizheyitougongyangdashenghechi：“nizheisishengkou，zaigandingren，

laozijiubanimaidaogourouguanqu！”yedongdemuguangshunjianbeineigenzaomugunzixiyinzhu，

tadexintiaodouranlouleyipai。qianshi，tazaifeipinzhanouranjiankandaoguoyizexinwen，

lincundezhangxiaobingcongleiside“ganyanggun”li，jingrantaochuleyigeqianlongnianjiandefeicuidiaozhui，

jushuoneidiaozhuijiazhibabaiwan。xiangdaozheili，yedongdeyanzhongshanguoyisijueran，takuaibuzoushangqianqu。“wangge，

ninzheigunmaibu？”yedongnuliyazhizheneixindejidong，keshouzhangxinqueyimanshihanshui。wangtufuxiezheyanjing，

manlianbuxiedichouletayiyan：“yejiugui，nishiyaomaiyanghaishimaiguna？yangshibakuaiyijin，zheigunma，

songnidouxing！”“womaigun！”yedongjimangcongdoulitaochuzhoubabadesishikuaiqian，youyouyuleyixia，

yiyaoyashuodao，“zaijiaershi，ninbagunrangjiwochengbu？”zhouweidecunminmendunshihongxiaoqilai。

“yejiuguizheishifengleba？juranhuasishikuaimaigenjiaoshigun！”“tingshuotabaxifudepeijiayinzhuozidounongdiule，

shuobudingshixiangnazheigunqudizhangni！”mianduizhongrendechaoxiao，yedongzhiruowangwen，jinjinzuanzhegunzi，

touyebuhuidiwangcunwaipaoqu。erbianfengshenghuhuzuoxiang，tanengqingxiditingjianzijidongdongdexintiaosheng，

fangfozaixuanshizhezheiyishi，tadingyaojiangsuoyoudeyihandouniansuizhongpin。yedongyilukuangbenhuizijiadetupiyuan，

zhouxiaofangzhengdunzaijingbianxizheluobu。tashuzhejiandandemahuabian，lianjiabeihanfengchuidetonghong，

youshouhaichanzhehouhoudeshabu，neishiqianshigongshangliuxiadefubi。“xiaofang！”yedongjidongdihanchusheng，

sangziqueyinweijinzhanghejidongerweiweifazhan。zhouxiaofangwenshenghuitou，yanzhongmanshijingti：“niyouhejiule？

zhuozini？wopeijiadeyinzhuodaodinaerqule！”yedongzheicaimengranxiangqi，qianshizijitoumaiyinzhuohaiduzhai，

haixiaofangkudehunjueguoqu。taganmangcongdoulitaochuneigenganyanggun，yuwuluncidishuodao：“womeimaizhuozi！

woqumaiyang…budui，maizheigunzi，yihouwoyidingzhuanqianjinimaijinzhuozi！”huayinweiluo，

yuanmenkouturanchongjinlaiyigepanglaotaitai，zhengshizhouxiaofangdemuqin，yejiushiyedongdezhangmuniang。

“yedongnizheigeshaqiandaode！jinggantouwoguinvdezhuozi！”zhangmuniangqishixiongxiongdipushanglai，

yibazhuazhuyedongdeyiling，“wojiuzhidaonishigefubushangqiangdelanni！xiaofanggenzheni，

jiumeiguoguoyitianhaorizi！”zaituisangzhijian，yedongyishimeiwenzhushenxing，jingjiangzhangmuniangzhuangdeshuaidaozaidi。

laotaitaishunshizuozaidishang，saqipolai：“darenla！yejiuguidarenla！”yedongjideetoubumanlelenghan，

tachongzhezhouxiaofangdashenghandao：“jiwoyixiaoshi！jiuyixiaoshi！woyidingzhengmingzheigunzinenghuanlaibaigeyinzhuo！

”shuoba，tajinjinbaozhegunzi，xiangfalefengsidewangzhenshangguwandianchongqu。

beihouchuanlaizhangmuniangfennudezhouma：“nigediangou！yaoshinengzhuanzheqian，wojiubaxingdaoguolaixie！

”zhenxitoude“juxiange”，dianneimimanzheyigusuanfudeqixi，laobanzhenglaosanzhengnazhefangdajing，

zixididuanxiangzheyigemingdaiciping。yedongmengdixiankaimenlianchuanglejinlai，

tashenshangdehanweishunjianyuwuneideqiweihunzazaiyiqi。“zhengshu，ninjizhangzhangyan？

”yedongbigongbijingdidishangganyanggun，shouxindehanshuizaoyibagunbingyinshi。zhenglaosanzhouzhemeitou，

niezhebizisuiyidifanlefangunzi：“zaomude，kanzheyoujishiniandeniantoule，yejiuzhigeshikuaiqian。

”dianlidejigechakejianzhuang，dunshihongxiaoqilai。“yejiuguizheishifengleba？jurannagenjiaoshigundangbaobei！

”“tayaoshinengkaozheigunzhuanbaiwan，wojiubazheichazhanchile！”yedongchongerbuwen，

tadezhijianzaigunfenglibutingdikouzhe。qianshidejiyirutongyizhanmingdeng，zhiyinzheta。taqingchudijide，

diaozhuijiuzangzaidisanjiesunmaochu！zhijiadoukouliele，zuanxindetengtongchuanlai，danyedonggubushangzheixie，zhongyu，

tamodaoleyigebingliangdewujian，wangwaiyichou，jingshiyigechanzhehongshengdefeicuidiaozhui！zhongrenshunjiandoubishanglezui，

dianneianjingdeluozhenkewen。zhenglaosanganmangdaishangbaishoutao，xiaoxinyiyidijieguodiaozhui，naqifangdajingzixiyiqiao，

shoujingranbushoukongzhidizhandouqilai：“zhei…zheijingranshidiwanglv！haishiqingdaiqianlongnianjiangongtingzaobanchudegongyi！

zheishuise，jianzhiqinrenxinpi，kanchengjipina！”chakemendelianshunjianzhangdetonghong，

yourenxiaoshengdidiguzhe：“gangcaihaixiaohuarenjiani…xianzailianketengle。”zhenglaosancuozheshuangshou，

manlianduixiaodiwen：“xiaoye，ni…nikaigejia？wochubashiwanshoule！”yedongjinjinzuanzhediaozhui，

wanghoutuileyibu：“zhengshu，wozaixiangxiang。”chumenshi，

tatingjiandianlichuanlaiyizhenaohuidipaidatuisheng：“wozenmejiumeikanchuzheisunmaoyouwentini！

baibaicuoshilebaiwana！”yedongdunzaizhenkoudelaohuaishuxia，xiyangdeyuhuisazaidiaozhuishang，

fanchuyaoyidelvseguangmang。qianshineixiebukandehuamianzaiciyongshangxintou。dufanglaobanjiangxiaofangtuozoushi，

tazuidelianzhandouzhanbuwen，zhinengyanzhengzhengkanzhebeijufasheng；xiaofangzanglishang，tabaozhekongjiupingkudechouchu，

keyiqiedouyijingwufawanhui，zhidaofentoucaozhanglesanchi，tacaizhenzhengyishidaozijidezuinie。

“laotianyejiranjilewozhonglaiyicidejihui，wojuebuzaidangnaozhong！”yedongyaoleyaoya，molemodiaozhui，

qishenwangjiazouqu。luguowujindianshi，tahualiangkuaiqianmailebaoshazhi，huidaojiahou，

biankaishizixididamodiaozhuiwaicengdebaojiang。suizhebaojiangyidiandianbeimodiao，feicuibentideguangzezhujianzhongxian，

yedongdeyankuangbujinweiweifasuan。zheiyishi，taananfashi，yidingyaorangxiaofangchengweizuitimiandekuotaitai，

yaorangneixiecengjingkanbuqitaderen，tongtongdouduitaguamuxiangkan。riziyitiantianguoqu，yedongpingjiezhediaozhuideshi，

zaidangdijianjianyoulexiemingqi。yiciourandejihui，tadezhijiangzhoujijiangjubanyichangshengdadejianbaodahui，

didianjiuzaizhanlanguansanlou。jushuozheichangjianbaodahuiyunjilegelushouzangjiedegaoshouhefuhao，

haiyouwushujiazhilianchengdebaowujianghuiliangxiang。yedongxinzhongyidong，tajuedezheishiyigejuejiadejihui，

huoxukeyijiecirangzijideshiyegengshangyicenglou。jianbaodahuidangtian，zhanlanguansanloudenghuohuihuang，

shuijingdengshanyaoderenjihuzhengbukaiyan。yedongchuanzhexidefabaidejundayi，zairenqunzhongxiandegegeburu，

gewaizhayan。erzaivipqu，zuozheyigemingjiaowangzihaodefujiazidi，

tashenbiangenzheyigedaijinsiyanjingdejunshi，kanqilaiyifuzhideyimandeyangzi。wangzihaoyiyanjiupiejianleyedong，

zuijiaogouqiyimobuxiedelengxiao：“yo，zheibushiyejiuguima？zenme，yepaolaicoujianbaoderenao？

buhuishilaicoushudeba？”yedongmeiyoulihuitadetiaoxin，muguangjinjindingzhetaishangjijiangzhanshidepaipin。

diyilundepaipinshiyikuailaizinanshenggangchutudefeicuiyuanshi，zuyoubanrenduogao，kanqilaizhidiwenrun，

yinyintouzheyisilvyi。zhuchirenbaowandijiahou，wangzihaohaobuyouyudijuqilepaizi：“1geyi！

”changxiadunshichuanlaiyizhendaochoulengqideshengyin，

tashenbiandejunshidishengfuerdao：“genjuzheikuaishitoudewenlulaikan，zhishaonengqiechusanfenzhiyidelv，

wenzhuanbupei！”jiuzaizhongrendouyiweizheikuaiyuanshifeiwangzihaomoshushi，yedongturanhuanhuanjuqilepaizi，

paizishangheranxiezhe“100kuai”。quanchangshunjianzhakaileguo。“zheirenfengleba？

juranna100kuaiduyigeyideyuanshi？”“yejiuguikendingyoufanbingle！

”wangzihaoqidepaianerqi：“yedong，nishibushiguyilaijiaojude？”yedongquebuhuangbumangdixiaolexiao，

luchuyikoujiebaideyachi：“wangshao，biejima。dushidushi，buqiekaizenmezhidaoshuyingni？”yuanlai，

qianshiyedongcengkanguoyizexinwen，baodaodejiushizheikuaiyuanshi，tazhongjianyoutiaoanlie，lvsejinjinzhizaibiaoceng，

yidanqiekai，houbanjiequanshibaimian，genbenbuzhiqian。jieshishifudaizhehumujing，kaishiqiegeyuanshi。

diyidaoxiaqu，biaocengguoranbaolv，wangzihaodeyididaxiaoqilai：“kandaoleba？

laozizhei1geyihuadezhi！”yedongquemiansepingjing，tachongzhejieshishifuhandao：“zaiqiezhongjianneidao！

”dangdierdaoluoxia，quanchangshunjianxianrulesiji。shitouzhongjianguoranchuxianleyidaoanlie，

erliehoudebufenquanshibaimian，jiazhishunjiansuoshuijiucheng。yedongtankaishuangshou，

sixiaofeixiaodikanzhewangzihao：“wangshao，ninkanzheishitouxianzaihaizhiduoshao？wo100kuaimai，ninmaibu？

”wangzihaodelianheiderutongguodi，zhouweichuanlaiyizhenqiexiaosheng：“fengshuilunliuzhuan，

meixiangdaowangshaoyeyoukanzouyandeshihoua！”yedongpingjiezhezheicijianbaodahui，mingshengdazao。

tanazhediwanglvdiaozhui，chenggonghezuowaimaodechenlaobantanchenglehezuo。chenlaobanchuzijin，yedongchuqudao，

liangrenyijunaxialedongnanya8yidefeicuidingdan。qianyueyanshang，shuijingdiaodengcuicanduomu，

yedongzairenqunzhongyiyanjiukandaoleneigechuanzhehongmaoyideshenying，zhengshizhouxiaofang。zheixierizi，

tayimenxinsipuzaishiyeshang，doumeihaohaopeibanguozhouxiaofang。zhouxiaofangshoulijinjinzuanzheyedongsongtadexinweijin，

yanshenzhongtouzheyisixiusehexinxi：“dongzi，nizhendebianle…danbuguanzenmeyang，wodouxiangxinni。

”yedongdehoulongyouxiefajin，tamomodijizhouxiaofangshengleyiwantang：“xiaofang，dengwobadingdanpaowan，

jiudainiqushanghai，jinimaizuicudejinzhuozi。”raner，jiuzaizheishi，jiudiandebaojianli，

wangzihaozhengfennudishuaizhebeizi：“jiwocha！zheigeyedongdaodinalaidediqi？haiyoutaneigefeicuidiaozhui，

bixujiwochaqingchulailu！”tazenmeyexiangbudao，yedongkoudailizhuangzhedezhongshengjiyi，

caishitazuilihaidewangpai。yedongnaxia8yidingdanhou，zaijiaoquzuxialeyizuochangfang，

zhunbeidazhangqigudijiagongfeicuishoushi。kaigongdianlineitian，zhouxiaofangteyichuanshangleyedongjitamaidehongnizidayi，

zhenggerenxiandegewaijingshen，taxiaodeyanjingdouwanchengleyueya：“dongzi，zanmenzhongyuyeyouzijidechangzila。