《lvlvchuangzaoqiji，niguanzheijiaoxunlianbailan？》shiyibuchongmanaiqingyumaoxiandedoushishenghuoxiaoshuo，youxiangyuweidenaichajingxingousiercheng。gushizhong，qinfengzhangfangzhengjinglileyiduanjianxindelvcheng，zaituzhongyudaole[biaoqian:zhujiaodebanlv]，errengongtongmianduizhelaizineixinhewaijiedekaoyan。tamentongguoyonggan、jianchihexinren，zuizhongzhanshenglekunnan，shixianlezijidemubiao。“buyongdanxinguanyumingtianhelibie”qinfengyuechangyueyouganjue。taquanshendouchenjinzailezheishougedehuanleqifenzhong。shenzhihu，tazhenggeshentidougenzheyinlelvdong……jianghuanqiduzhexinzhongduiaiqingheyongqidexiangwang。
laoxuefaxianleqinfengkanxiangzijidemuguang，haiyiweiqinfengzheishizaiganjiziji。
taxiaozheduizheqinfengdianlediantou，shuodao：“buyongganxiewo，zheishiniyingdede。”
“youcaihuaderendaonalidounengfaguang。”
“haishineijuhua，womenjuesaishangjian。”
“qidainidebiaoxiane，qinfengtongxue！”
秦风想骂娘！
sheiyaohenitaotaisaishangjian！
你又不是大**！
赶紧给老子改口！
buguo，qinfenggenbenmeijihuikaikou。
啪！啪！啪！
xianchangxiangqileyizhenyouyizhendezhangsheng。
tongxuemenhaizaipinminghuanhuhecai。
qinfengganjuezijirendoumale。
jiuzaizheishi，takandaoletaixiadezhangfangzheng。
tashuangyanturanliangleqilai。
zijishibeizhangfangzhengzhuabaoguolaide。
zhangfangzhengyinggaiyoubanfarangzijituisaiba？
qinfengganjinxiangzhetaixiadezhangfangzhengkuaibuzouqu。
“秦风，恭喜了！”
“meixiangdaonizheixiaozijingranzheimehuichang，zhenshirenbukemaoxianga！”
“qinfeng，yihouchumingle，nengjiwozhangqianmingzhaoma？”
qinfengyiluxiangtaixiazouqu，quebeiyiqunrenshidehuoburenshidetongxuegezhongdaohe。
qinfengxianzainayoushijianlihuitamen。
tayibianfuyanzhediantou，yibianjiaobubuting。
tongxuemenjianzhuang，xinliduoduoshaoshaodouyoudianbushiziwei。
“qinfengzheihaimeihongni！jiupiaole？”
“huadoulandehewomenzheixietongxueshuole？”
“renjiashuodezhenmeicuo，nanrenyidanyouqianyoumingjiubianhuai。”
cishi，qinfengyijinglaidaolezhangfangzhengmianqian。
zhangfangzhengkandaoqinfeng，lianshangrenbuzhuluchulexinweidexiaorong，shuodao：“qinfeng，gandebucuo。”
“xuefendewenti，niyihoubuyongdanxinle！”
zhouweidetongxueshunjianjiubeijingdaole。
“maya！qinfengzheishizouleshenmegoushiyuna！”
“bisaijinji，youjihuichudaming。”
“xuefenyebuyongguanle？”
“tuotuoderenshengyingjia！”
tongxuemenxianmudekoushuidouyaoliuxialaile。
tebieshixuefenbugoudexuezhamen，douxiangshengtunleqinfeng。
jiuzaizheishi，qinfengyilianjiqiedikanxianglezhangfangzheng，shuodao：“laoshi，wonengbujixucanjia《xiaoyuangeshou》ma？”
“qinfeng，youshenmeyaoqiu，nidoukeyiti，nengmanzunide……”
zhangfangzhengxiaozhexiaozhe，biaoqingjiujiangzhule，shuozheshuozhe，jiushuobuchuxiaqule。
tazhongyuyishidaoleqinfengzaishuoshenme。
talianshangrenbuzhuluchulezhenjing。
什么？
qinfengshuobuxiangjixucanjia《xiaoyuangeshou》？
自己没听错吧？
《xiaoyuangeshou》taotaisaikeshihuizaidianshishangbofangde！
谁能拒绝呀？
秦风脑袋没问题吧？
ganggangneixieshuoqinfengyinweijinjipiaoledetongxue，cishigengshimudengkoudai。
“buhuiba？qinfengzhenyaotuichu？”
“为什么？”
“bierenjiponaodaidouqiangbuguodejihui，tayaofangqi？”
“womenganggangwuhuiqinfengle？”
suoyouzhidaoqinfengyaotuichu《xiaoyuangeshou》deren，douchedimengquanle。
cishi，zhangfangzhengzhongyuhuanleguolai。
tazhouzhemeitoukanxiangqinfeng，wendao：“weishenme？”
qinfengxiangyemeixiang，jiushuodao：“laoshi，qishiwoshigeshekong。”
“wohaipawutai，haipamianduiyidaqunren。”
“wozhendebuxiangzaishangwutaile。”
zhangfangzhengchadianyitouzaidaozailedishang。
pangbiandeyixietongxueganjuezijixiabaheyanzhuzidouyaodiaozaidishangle。
ganggangpingweimenhaoxiangshuoguo，qinfengjingtouganshizu，wutaijingyanfengfu。
qinfengzaitaishangdecongronghedanding，jiuxiangshigeyoufengfuwutaijingyandeyiren！
xianzai，qinfengshuozijishekong，haipawutai？
谁相信谁是傻子！
张方正也不相信。
buguo，tayemeiqubaogenwendi。
shaoweichenyinzhihou，tadebiaoqingbiandeyansuleqilai。
yishuangyanjingjinjindingzheqinfeng，zhangfangzhengshuodao：“qinfeng，xuexiaolingdaohewoshuole。”
“niganggangzaiwutaishangdebiaoyanhuibeijianjixialai，fadaodouyinshang。”
“nijianghuishiwomenxuexiaoduiwaideyizhangmingpian。”
“nimingbaiwoyisima？”
zhangfangzhengzheifanhuashuowan，qinfengdouhaimeizuochufanying，zhouweidetongxuemenjiuzhale。
“wocao！qinfengdebiaoyanhuibeijianjixialai，yixuexiaodeguanfanghaofabu？”
“shenzhihu，xuexiaohaihuijiangqinfengdangchengmingpian？”
“xuexiaozheishijiangqinfengdangchenglemofan？”
“zheiyangyilai，xuexiaojiuxiangdangyuzaijiqinfengbeishule！”
beiyisuoxuexiaobeishu，shishenmegainian？
zheimeshuo，zhiyaozheijiaxuexiaobudao，zhiyaoqinfengbufanxiayuanzexingcuowu。
秦风就不会倒！
tongxuemenxianzaikanzheqinfeng，jiuxiangshimayikandaoletianshi，shayuwendaolexuexingwei，yanjingdouzhile！
qinfengdangranzhidaozhangfangzhengzheiduanhuadefenliang。
但！
狗才当艺人！
tayilianjiandingdikanxiangzhangfangzheng，shuodao：“laoshi，woxiangtuichu。”
zhangfangzhengchadian“wocao”chusheng。
zheixiaozinaodaishizhenyoukenga！
zenmexiangshitouniuyiyangjuea？
zhangfangzhengyoudianweinanle，xianrulechensi。
turande，zhangfangzhengnaohailimaochulegexiangfa。
tashuangyanyiliang，zuijiaoluchuleyimo“yinxian”dexiaorong，kanzheqinfengshuodao：“qinfeng，nibuhuibuxiangyaoxuefenleba？”
纳尼？
zheigoudongxishixiangyongxuefenweixieziji？
qinfengdangji“ehenhen”didingzhulezhangfangzheng，shuodao：“laoshizhiqianbushishuole？”
“zhiyaowoshangtaijiujiwoxuefen？”
“erqieniganggangyeshuole，rangwobuyongdanxinxuefen！”
“nizongbunengyanerwuxinba？”
zhangfangzhengxiaole，xiaodetebiekaihuai，shuodao：“woshishuoguozheihua。”
“kewoyemeishuoguojinijigexuefen。”
“jianyuniganggangdeyouxiubiaoxian，wozhunbeijini……yigedaxuefen！”
“哈哈哈……”
shuodaozuihou，zhangfangzhengdourenbuzhuxiaochushenglaile。
qinfengxianzaihaichasangexuefencainengbiye。
zhangfangzhengjiletayige，tahaichalianggeya！
qinfengbuyouyaoyaqiechidikanxianglezhangfangzheng，shuodao：“suannihen！”
zhangfangzhengyoudaxiaolejisheng，zheicaishenshouqingqingpailepaiqinfengjianbang，shuodao：“laoshiyoubuhuihaini。”
“好好努力。”
“laoshi，huichixuguanzhunijiexialaidebiaoxiande。”
关注你姥姥的！
qinfengxianzaiyigezidoubuxianghezhangfangzhengshuole。
tazhiganjuezijiderenshengyipiancandan，zhenggerendoubiandeyouqiwulileqilai。
kandaozheiyimudetongxuemen，cishiqueshidouyijingchedimale。
“woganggangdoukandaoleshenme！”
“yigezaipinmingjihaochu，yigezaisimingjujue？”
“zuihou，zhongyujianghaochusongchuderen，huantianxidi，xiangshizuochengleshenmedashiyiyang？”
“jieshoulehaochudeneiren，chuitousangqi，shengwukelian？”
“wocao！zheidoushenmeshidaoya！”
妻子酒后越界，下场比鬼还惨
作者：天天走上
栏目：都市
zuozhe：wowudilehaizinuligen
栏目：都市
zuozhe：xiangzuobaifumeidexiaoniu
栏目：都市
假装穷小子体验生活，校花女友当众羞辱我，我摊牌了。
zuozhe：choumingzhaozhudemingzhengnvdi
栏目：都市
作者：木千
栏目：都市
一屋子亲戚逼我交出抚恤金，说我是个废物不配用
作者：加勒比海怪
栏目：都市
