我对门的青梅是戏精叫我杨哥-著

小说简介

jiaowoyanggedexiaoshuo《woduimendeqingmeishixijing》yiqijingcaideqingjieheshenduderenwukehuaxiyinleguangdaduzhe。gushizhong，linxiaomanluchenzhoujinglileyiduanlingrennanwangdelvcheng，faxianlezijineizaidelilianghejiazhi。tongguomianduikunnanhetiaozhan，linxiaomanluchenzhouzhujianbaituoshufu，zhanxianchuwuxiandeqianli。zheibuxiaoshuochongmanlexiwangyuchengzhang，yuqimeishenmeqifu：“neizhongmanzuipaohuoche，kaoxugourenmailaichengchangmianderen，bushiheni。”“shibushiheyaoniguan！”linxiaomanxiangzhibeicaileweibademao，“ni……bijiangjiduzheliuxiashenkedeyinxiang。

精彩章节

1xiangqinbeikezhangjiehu“ma！wozaishuozuihouyibian！wo——bu——qu——xiang——qin——！

”linxiaomanbazijishuaijinrouruandeshafali，shoujikailemianti，

tingzhedianhuaneitoumuqincuinvshidiediebuxiudelaotao，ganjueyigetoulianggeda。ta，fanglingershiwu，

yimingguangrongderenminxiaoxuemeishujiaoshi，renshengzuidadezhuiqiujiushitangpingzuoyitiaokuailedexianyu。raner，

zheigeposudeyuanwangzaitanianmanershiwuhou，beicuinvshiwuqingdijisuile。“xiaomana，bushimashuoni，

nidouershiwule！nvrenzuihaodenianjijiuzheimejinian！

gebiwangayizheicijinijieshaodekeshishuiwujudezhengjingkeyuan，tiefanwan！renjiakanlenizhaopian，henmanyi！

jinwanqidian，shizhongxinneijia‘zhuanjiaokafeiguan’，nibixuqu！”“tiefanwan？ma，

wozijijiushitiefanwanhaoma？”linxiaomanyouqiwulidifanbo，“xiaoxuelaoshi，bianzhi！wenwendexingfu！

wobuxuyaolingyigetiefanwanlaidiebuff！”“nidongshenme！shuangzhigong，shuangtiefanwan，

neijiaoyigewenrutaishan！wogaosunilinxiaoman，niyaoshiganfanggezi，wojiu……”cuinvshideweixiehaimeishuowan，

menlingxiangle。“dingdong——dingdong——”qingcuidemen**rutongjiushudeshengyin，linxiaomanrumengdashe，

ganjinduizheshoujihandao：“ma！yourenqiaomen！kenengshixueshengjiazhang！woxiangualea！zheishierzaishuo！”shuowan，

budengcuinvshifanying，taxunsuguaduandianhua，zhangzhangshuleyikouqi。talazhetuoxiezoudaomenkou，

taxiguanxingditouguomaoyanwangwaikan。zheiyikan，taxinlidunshi“gedeng”yixia。menwaizhanzheluchenzhou。

duimendeqingmeizhuma，bitaxiaosangeyue，rujinshishiweixuanchuanbuzuinianqingyouweidefukezhang。

nanrenchuanzheyijianyuntiedeyichenburandebaichenshan，xiukouwandaoxiaobei，

luchuxiantiaoliuchangdeshouwanheyikuaikanqilaijiujiazhibufeidewanbiao。xizhuangkubiting，chendetashuangtuixiuzhang。

tameiyanqingjun，bilianggaoting，zhishineishuangkanxiangmaoyan（fangfonengchuantoumenbankandaota）demouzi，

zongshidaizhedianguanchangde、rangtamomingxinxudeliangyi。linxiaomanyingzhetoupidakaimen，

jichuyigejiaxiao：“ludakezhang，youheguigan？

”luchenzhoudemuguangzaitashenshangneijianyinzhe“tangpingwansui”dekatongshuiyishangsaoguo，

meishaojibukechadidongleyixia，yuqipingdanwubo：“linxiaoman，nishanggeyuecengwocheshangxiaban，yigongshiqici，

shuohaodeaayouqian，shenmeshihouzhuanwo？”linxiaoman：“……”tajiuzhidao！“luchenzhou！

niyigexuanchuanbudakezhang，jiuchawozheierbaikuaiqian？”taqidexiangduojiao。taxianlexiayanpi，gangxiangshuohua，

linxiaomanwozaishoulideshoujiyoufengkuangzhendongqilai，pingmushangheranxianshizhe“cuinvshi”sangedazi。

luchenzhoushixianlveguopingmu，feichangzirandishenshou，congtashoulinaguoleshouji，jieting。“ayi，shiwo，chenzhou。

”takaikoudeshunjian，yuqiconggangcaidelengdanqiehuanchengwenheyouli，bianliansuduzhikuairanglinxiaomantanweiguanzhi，

“ng，tazaijia……xiangqin？kafeiguan？……hao，ninbieji，wozhidaole……ng，ninfangxin，jiaojiwo。

”sanyanliangyu，tagualedianhua，jiangshoujidihaijiyilianmengbidelinxiaoman。“cuiayidemingling，”takanzheta，

yuqihuifulezhiqiandedanran，shenzhihaidaishangleyisiburongzhiyi，“jinwandexiangqin，wogenniyiqiqu。

bangnibaguan。”linxiaoman：“？？？”yushi，dangwanqidiandezhuanjiaokafeiguan，chuxianlejiqiguiyideyimu。

linxiaomanheneiwei“tiefanwan”shuiwuyuangangadizuozaikaochuangdekazuo。ertamenpangbiandekazuo，

luchenzhoudianleyibeiheikafei，mantiaosilidihezhe，shoubianhaitankaizheyifenwenjian，fangfozhishilaicibangong。

raner，taneiqiangdadecunzaigan，rangzhenggekazuoquyudekongqidoufangfoninggule。

“tiefanwan”xianshengxianranyeganshoudaoleyali，weilezhaohuichangzi，

takaishitaotaobujuedichuixuzijiderenmai：“linlaoshi，bumannishuo，wozaitizhineipengyouhenduode。

jiubirushiweixuanchuanbudelukezhang，genwoguanxihentiede！jingchangyiqichifan……”tahuayingangluo，

pangbiankazuojiuchuanlaiyishengqingweidebeiziyudiepanpengzhuangdeqingcuishengxiang。linxiaomanxiayishipieguoqu。

zhijianluchenzhouyouyadinaqicanjincalecazuijiao，ranhouweiweiceguotou，muguangpingjingdiluozai“tiefanwan”shenshang，

shengyinbuda，queqingxidichuanruliangrenerzhong：“baoqian，daduanyixia。”tadunledun，

yuqidaizheyisiqiadaohaochudeyihuo，“zheiweixiansheng，womenrenshima？

”“tiefanwan”lianshangdexiaorongshunjianjiangzhu，lianseyirouyankejiandesuduyouhongzhuanbai，zaiyoubaizhuanqing，

huoxiangyigebeidafandediaosepan。linxiaomanzaixinlimomojiluchenzhoudianlegezan：sharenzhuxin，buguoruci。

**（diyizhangwan）**---2tongyangxideheilishixiangqinyanziranshichedihuangle。huichengdecheshang，

linxiaomanxihaoanquandai，qigugudidengzhejiashizuoshangneigezuikuihuoshou。luchenzhouzhuanzhudikanzheqianfanglukuang，

celianxiantiaozaichuangwailiuzhuandeguangyingxiaxiandegewaililuolengying。“luchenzhou，nijueduishiguyide！

”tazhongyurenbuzhu，dapolecheneidechenmo。taxiuzhangdeshouzhiqingqingqiaoleqiaofangxiangpan，

yuqimeishenmeqifu：“neizhongmanzuipaohuoche，kaoxugourenmailaichengchangmianderen，bushiheni。

”“shibushiheyaoniguan！”linxiaomanxiangzhibeicaileweibademao，“nishiwosheia？pingshenmetiwozuojueding！

”luchenzhouhuranceguotou，shensuidemuguangzaitaqigugudelianshangtingliuleliangmiao，ranhou，

tayongyizhongjinhuchenshushishidepingdanyuqikaikou：“woshinichadianjiuchengle‘tongyangxi’deren。”yijuhua，

rutonganxialeshiguangdaoliujian，balinxiaomanshunjianlahuileneixiebukanhuishou（duitaeryan）deheilishi。

jushuangfangjiazhanghuishenghuisedemiaoshu，luchenzhouxiaoshihoushentibutaihao，yougesuanmingxianshengqiazhiyisuan，

shuozheihaizidezhuzailinjiagebi，haideyougebitadadiande“jiejie”yazhe，cainengpinganshunsuidizhangda。yushi，

bitaxiaosangeyuedeluchenzhou，jiubeitamamalvayibankaiwanxiao、banrenzhendi“xu”jilelinxiaoman，

meiqimingyue“tongyangxi”。neihuier，linxiaomanzaitonglinghaizilisuangaodazhuangde，erluchenzhouzexianggedouyacai，

youshouyouxiao，genzaitahoumian，xianggechenmodexiaoweiba。taneishihoukezhenyou“jiejie”yanger，

shangxiaxueqianzhetadeshou（patazoudiu），bazijibuaichidefeiroutoutousaitawanli（meiqimingyueyingyangjunheng），

gengshirezhongyukaifagezhong“heianliaoli”，bizhetadangshouxishichiguan……jieguoyouyici，

taxiongxinbobodichangshi**“caihongdangao”，buzhidaonagehuanjiechulecuo，

zhijiebadangshicaixiaoxuebiyedeluchenzhouchijinleyiyuan，gualeyigexingqideshui。

zhenduanshushangminghuanghuangxiezhesigezi：shiwuzhongdu。houlai，buzhidaoshilvayide“pianfang”zhendeqilezuoyong，

haishiluchenzhouzishenjiyinjuexing，daolechuzhong，taturanjiuxiangyuhouchunsunbankaishimengzhanggetou。daolegaozhong，

tayijingtupoleyimiba，congdouyacaijinhuachengleqingsongcuibo。yucitongshi，

tadezhishangyequanmiannianyalelinxiaoman，congxuyaota“zhaozhe”de“xiaoxifu”，

hualizhuanshenchengletabamakouzhong“nikankanrenjiachenzhou”debiaogan。tayezaiyebukenjiaotajiejiele。

“chen、nian、wang、shi！neidoushinimakaiwanxiaode！ninengbunengbiezaitile！”linxiaomanlaolianyihong，

youxiuyounao，henbudepushangquwuzhutadezui。luchenzhouqinghengyisheng，zhuanguotoujixukaiche，meizaishuohua，

zhishizuijiaosihugouqileyimojidandehudu。chezipingwenditingzaitamenzhudedanyuanlouxia。linxiaomanjieanquandai，

zhunbeixiache，shougangpengdaomenba，taquehuranjiaozhuleta。“linxiaoman。”“ganma？”tameihaoqidihuitou。

takanzheta，yanshenzaicheneihunandeguangxianxiaxiandeyouxienanyizhuomo，shengyindichen：“yihou，

bieshenmeamaoagoudouqujian。”tadunledun，buchongleyiju，yuqidaizhedianlisuodangran：“diuwoderen。

（dierzhangwan）**---3xijingdejiananyoufangandiyige“tiefanwan”beiluchenzhouwuqing“jichen”hou，

linxiaomandejiujiushanliangdengchangle。jiujiuzaijiaoyujugongzuo，xiaoxilingtong，

tajilinxiaomanjieshaoleyiweigangcongxiamianxuexiaojiediaoshanglaide“qingniancaijun”，jushuonenglichuzhong，yibiaorencai，

qiantubuke**。jiujiubaduifangdezhaopianfaguolai，queshimeiqingmuxiu，daizhejinsiyanjing，

henyoujifenruyaqizhi。linxiaomanbenzhefenxiang（jianshitan）dexintai，bazhaopianzhuanfajileluchenzhou。

luchenzhoudehuifuyanjianyigai，yirujiwangdedushe：【yanshenbuzheng，xinsibuchun。】linxiaomanbufuqi，

genduifangliaolejitian。guoran，meidaoyigexingqi，zheiwei“rencaige”jiukaishipangqiaoceji，

xunwentajiujiuzaijulideyingxiangli，yijinengfouzaijijiangdaolaidekaohezhongbangta“meiyanjiju”。

linxiaomanduizheshoujipingmufanlegedadadebaiyan，zhijiebaliaotianjilujietufajilejiujiu，bingfuyan：【jiujiu，

ninzheiyanguang，haishizhuanzhushiyeba！】tazai“xingfuyijiaren”deweixinqunlifennupaoxiao：【woxuanbu！

congjintianqi，wolinxiaomanfengxinsuoai，zaiyebuxiangqinle！sheizaijiwojieshao，wogensheiji！

】xinxigangfachuqumeiduojiu，mushangdarendedianhuajiuzhuileguolai。

linxiaomankanzhepingmushangtiaodongde“cuitaihou”sangezi，toupifama，buxiangjie。dandianhua**qieerbushe，

fangfotabujiejiunengyizhixiangdaotianhuangdilao。tashenxiyikouqi，anxiajietingjian，zhunbeiyingjiebaofengyu。

“linxiaoman！nifanletianle！buxiangqin？nixiangganma？dangnigua？”cuinvshidesangmenchuantoulijiqiang。

linxiaomanbeihoudeerduowengwengxiang，naoziyire，tuokouerchu：“sheishuowomeinanpengyou？wozaojiuyoule！

zhishimeigaosunimeneryi！”dianhuaneitoushunjiananjingle。siyibandejijing。jinjiezhe，

shicuinvshidouranbagao、daizhenanyizhixinheyisi……jingxi？（yidingshicuojue）deshengyin：“shenme？！

niyounanpengyoule？shei？shenmeshihoudeshi？ganshenmede？duodanianji？

jiali……”yilianchuandewentirutongjiguanqiangsaosheerlai，linxiaomanchedimengle，wozheshouji，zhangkoujieshe，

yigeziyebianbuchulai。wanle，chuiniuchuidale！jiuzaitajidemantoudahan，

zhunbeiyingzhetoupisuibianbiange“yidilian”“wangluoqingyuanyixianqian”shi，menlingrutongtianlaibanxiangleqilai。

“dingdong——dingdong——”jiuxing！yidingshijiuxing！linxiaomanrutongzhuazhulejiumingdaocao，

yegubushangdianhuaneitoudemuqinhaizailianhuanzhuiwen，dahanyisheng：“ma！yourenqiaomen！kenengshiwonanpengyoulaile！

dengxiashuo！”ranhouwuzhehuatong，baimichongcibanpaodaomenkou，yibalakailemen。menwai，

luchenzhouchuanzhejiandandehuisejiajufu，shouliduanzheyipanqiehaode、shuilinglingdeguopan，shensedanrandikanzheta。

“cuiayirangwosonglaide。”tajulejushouzhongdeguopan，muguanglveguotashoulihailiangzhetonghuapingmudeshouji，

ranhou，feichangzirandi、qingxididuizheshoujihuatongdefangxiangshuodao：“xiaoman，sheidedianhua？liaozheimejiu。

”tadeshengyintouguohuatong，qingxidichuandaoleneitou。dianhuali，cuinvshideshengyinshunjiantigaolebagedu，

daizhenanyizhixindekuangxi：“shichenzhouma？！xiaoman！ninanpengyou……shichenzhou？！aiya！nizheihaizi！

zenmebuzaoshuo！haimaxiacaoxin！haohaohao！nimenliao！nimenliao！mabudaraole！gualeguale！

”“du…du…du…”tingzhedianhualidemangyin，linxiaomanshihuazaiyuandi，shoulihaiwozheshouji，

weichizhekaimendezishi，danaoyipiankongbai。luchenzhoukanzhetazheifudailengdemoyang，yandishanguoyisixiaoyi，

tachaotajibukechadidianlediantou。linxiaomanfuzhixinling，shunjianxijingfuti，yibabaozhuluchenzhoudegebo，

yongzijidoujuedenisirendeshengyinduizheyijingguaduandedianhua（zhuyaoshiyanjimourenkan）jiaochendao：“aiya，

ma~nidoucaidaolela！shia，wohechenzhou……womenzaiyiqiyouyiduanshijianle，

benlaixiangdengguanxiwendinglezaigaosunimendema！”ganshoudaoshoubeishangchuanlaidewenrechugan，

luchenzhoushentijibukechadijiangleyixia，suijifankeweizhu，jiangguopanhuandaolingyizhishou，

ranhoujinjinwozhuletahuanzaitageboshangdeshou，shizhijinkou。taduizhekongqi（tongyangshiweileyanxi），

yuqichenwen，daizheyizhongrangrenanxindeliliang：“ayi，shiwo。ninfangxin，wohuizhaoguhaoxiaomande。

”loudaolianjingxialai，zhishengxialiangrenjiaowodeshouhejinzaizhichidehuxisheng。linxiaomantaitou，

duishangtashensuideyanmou，xinzanghouzhihoujuedi、fengkuangditiaodongqilai。

**（disanzhangwan）**---4fumudeshenzhugong“guanxuan”dehouguo，

jiushishuangfangfumuyiguangsuzuchengle“cuihunlianmeng”，zhandoulijingren。xianshizhoumo，

liangjialiukourenjuzailinxiaomanjiachifan。canzhuoshang，tabamahelushushulvayixiangtanshenhuan，

cong“zheihaiziliangcongxiaojiubanpei”liaodao“yihoushenglehaizixiangsheibijiaohao”，

zuihoushenzhiyijingkaishitaolunsunzisunnvgaijiaoshenmemingzi、qunajiayoueryuanle。linxiaomanheluchenzhoubingpaizuozhe，

anjingruji，zhinengmaitoukuchi。tazaizhuoxiatoutoutileluchenzhouyijiao，yongyanshenshiyi：“xiangxiangbanfa！

”luchenzhoumianwubiaoqingdijitajialeyikuaizitazuitaoyanchideqingcai，

yongzhiyouliangrennengtingdaodeshengyinshuo：“duochidian，buchongweishengsu。”linxiaoman：“……”suannihen！

zheihaizhishikaishi。mougezhouliudezaochen，linxiaomanshuidaorishangsangan，xiangzhechumenmishi，

xiguanxingdianzhiwenkaisuo——“di——yanzhengshibai。”mimashuru。“di——yanzhengshibai。

”dianzisuopingmuyipianqihei，haowufanying。“bukenenga！woshangzhoucaichongdedian！

”linxiaomanduizhemensuoyoupaiyouan，jidetuantuanzhuan。shoujijiushengbaifenzhiwudedian，chongdianbaoyemeidianle，

jianzhishixueshangjiashuang。jiuzaizheishi，shoujipingmuliangqi，cuinvshidedianhuashishidalejinlai。“ma！

zanjiamensuohaoxianghuaile！dabukaile！”linxiaomanganjinqiujiu。“aiya！zhendema？