baokuanxiaoshuowohejiaorenshidihuhuanrenxiudaolvzhujiaoshiluyanzhiqingyan，shiyibuxuanhuankehuandexiaoshuo，zuozhegulongdongwenbihenyouhuamiangan，juqingfazhandiedangqifu，zhideyikan。gushijianjie：linsujieshizijiqingchaoyijingdaole，pengqiaoyujianta。taliuzheleishuotabushiguyide。wosuiranjieyi，danyueshuangdousongkouyuanliangdeqingkuangxia，ziranyemeishenmeli……
2
linsusihushifenxiaiyueshuang。
riyeyutapaozaihantanli，youxunlaibushaoqihuayicaogongjitayangshang。
gengguanjiandeshi，jiaorenxingyin，tabuxiqiansandongfulibiederenpu，zhuanchongtayige——zheizaiyiwang，shiqiansuoweiyoudeshiqing。
shanmenli，dizimenyiluntaqingshensihaideshengyinriyigaozhang，renpumentiqiyueshuangshigengshihaobuyanshidexianmu。
“nengbeixuemaigaoguiyouwenroutitiedelinsushaozhupengzaixinjianjianshangchong，kezhenshitaixingfule！”
“shiya，buxiangbulishandeneigechoubaguai，shengdechoulinglidi，zhuziyebushangxin。renpumenmingrigaiqucelinggen，qianjitianwoquekandaotaduzizaihoushancaihuachongji，kanyangzishangyemeizhi......qiaozhezhenkelian。”
“sheirangluyanzhitieshixinchangni。”
“zaishuole，neirenpuqueshikechen，youchouyoufei。xixixi......choupupeiezhu，daoyexiangyi。”
wozhixiaolinsumingshengbiwohao。
tazongshixiaolianxiangying，xihaojiaoji，youwubilianxineixieruoxiaokelianderenpu。
tazhuanyanshuangxiuzhishu，shanyumeihuo。
danfannengdetahuanxindeshouhuozheren，tatongtongyuanyinarudongfuliyangzhe。
shishanmenlichulemingdedashanren。
erwochangniandujubulishan，xingqinggupi，zongshibiguan，meicifengshimingchushanguilai，yishenchongtianxuexingzhiqibushuo，haidelinshangyizhangchuanbeidabaodeshoutou。
shimenzhongbizhimojidecunzai。
tamenweijuwo，buaiqinjinwo。
danyeyinwoqiangdadeshiliduiwoxinyuechengfu。
zheihaishiwodiyicitingdaoshanmenneiderenyongzheibanbiyideyuqitiqiwo，wozixiqiaoleyanneigaotankuolundequanerdizi。
woshideta——shishudexiaodizi，linsudezhixishidi，lieyanquanchenglin。
bannianqianwoyulinsuqianwangyichudanengmijingtanxian，linsuxiangdaitatongxing，beiwoyitaxiuweibugoujujuehou，sihujiuhenshangwo。
“轰——”
diediebuxiudequanrenbeipingkongchuxiandezhangfengjizhong，jingzhizhuangshanglubiandegaodashanshi，ouchuyikouxue。
“谁找死！”
kanqingshiwo，tayishuangpafudequanerzhanlezhan，quezuiying：“luyanzhi，niqikezhangzhezijixiuweigaojiusuiyigongjitongmen！”
“不然呢？”
“xiangniyiyangzhangzhexiuweicha，zhiganbeihoudazuipao？”
wosaoleyiyantabushoukongzhiluchulaidezhamaogouwei，biyidao：“lianrenshendouwufaweichidechunhuo！”
shourenkemeiyoushenmebudatongmendeshuofa。
谁强谁说了算。
不闹出兽命就行。
chenglinzizhibudi，huazuolieyanquanluohuangertao。
zheiyimubaqitadizikanmengle。
youshengpaaidadediziganmangtaorao：“yan......yanzhizhishaozhu，womenzhishixianmuneigerenpu，bushichenglinneigeyisi。”
wobaibaishou，bingbuzaiyi。
xianhuatingduole，wushangtongyangdewoshaoyoufangzaixinshang。
anshangfangzheyiyuesejingshuiping，chazhehoushanteyoudeqianyingselinghua。
“你回来啦！”
mingmeijiaomeidenvzireqingdiyingchulai，wanzhewodegebojiangwowangwuneiyin：“jinrikaolelurou，peishanggangqiadezisuyehelihuajiu，niyidingxihuan。”
jingguoshuyuexiuyang，qingyandeshanghaole，rongyanyehuifu，shuxixialai，wozheicaizhitachulelinggenbuhao，qitadouhenhao。
前所未有的好。
tacongbuxianqiwojidedongxibuhexinyi。
tabuhuijuedewopengjitatiancaidibaoshiweilexiuruta，zhihuantianxidideshouxia。
tagengbuhuilizhiqizhuangderangwojitajinghualinggen。
tabawodedongfudalidexianchenburan、jingjingyoutiao，rangwomeiciguilaidouyouxinxianshiwukeyixiangyong。
taduiwoxiaolianxiangying，zheijigeyue，woshenzhimeijianguotashengqishishenmemoyang。
xiangdaozheili......yuexiangyueqi！
woshangbeizidaodishiyanglegeshenmechilibawai、enjiangchoubaodewanyier！
shizunshuodedui，dangshoujiuyaoyaoduozhangjianshi，buraneleshenmedouchidexia！
jiubiruxianzai，wofangxiakuaizi，liansebudahaokan，qingyanyemeiyoushiruowudu，ershiqiaopidiwenwojinriwaichukeshiyudaoshenmebushunxindeshiqing？
woyaoyaotou，tiqilingwaiyijianshi。
“mingripuyuanceshirenpulinggen，nikefouxiangqu？”
woyiweitahuizhijiejujue，quemeixiangdaotadiantouyingxia。
xingrenshuimouzhongmanhanqidaizhise。
“我想去。”
gaotaishang，yishenbaiyi，zirongjuechendeyueshuangjiangshouzhangtieshangcelingshi，shangkongshunjianningjiechuyidapianbingjing，bansuizheyidaobaiguangchongtianerqi。
puyuanzhanglaojichujipinbinglinggendepingji。
“linsushaozhunengliqiangpiqihao，liantiaorenpudeyanguangdouzheimeqiang，zhenlingrenpeifu！”
“kebushi。buxiangyanzhishaozhu，haohaodebinglinggenbuyao，feitiaoyigeshenmeyebushidezalinggen，xianzaizhipachangzidouyaohuiqingle。”
“youlejipinbinglinggen，yinianhoudeshaozhudabi，yingjiakanlaizhinengshilinsushaozhule！”
wolingzheqingyanmaijinchangnei，erbianquanshizhurucileideyilunsheng。
linsudangchangheyueshuangjiexiazhupuqiyue，manmianchunguangdizouxiangwo：“shixiong，nizenmeyelaile，nandaonineigezalinggenderenpuyexiangceyixiajutidengji？wokanmeizheibiyaoleba。”
yueshuangzhudongshangqianqianzhutadeshou，pielewoyiyan。
旁边传来一串笑声。
“mouxieshouhemouxierendoumeiyouzizhizhiming，buxiandiurenxianyan，yuanyilaiziquqirubei”chenglinjinsuiqihoujieleyiju。
budaiwofazuo，qingyanxiaoyingyingzoushangqian：“zheiweishixiongkeshiquanxishouren？”
chenglinangshou，hunshenfuchuyicengdanhonghuoguang。
“laozishilieyanquan，kebushishenmeputongdequanxi！”
tashangxiadaliangchenglin，yipaitianzhenmoyang。
“区别大吗？”
“不大吧。”
“你不也爱吃屎？”
成霖气炸了。
naiheyouwozai，tazhinengzaichaoxiaoshengzhongwunengpaoxiao，zuihouzaibeiwoyizhitoushanfei。
qingyanzhanshangtai，shoushenlesuohuiyoushenchu，piankejianyishimantouhan。
tajinzhangdikanwo，wodiquyigegulideyanshen。
她将手掌贴上去。
celingshihaowufanying，zuijichudeliangguangdoumeiyou。
全场哗笑。
作者：易四海
栏目：玄幻
作者：卡里斯法赫
栏目：玄幻
说好体验生活，你管这叫废柴
作者：奶酪泡可乐
栏目：玄幻
开局打脸，我缺的只是一个机会
作者：金水炎
栏目：玄幻
作者：井深似海
栏目：玄幻
我，神话蛊师，开局种下神话校花
作者：无敌大神
栏目：玄幻
