《wozhanwububai》shizuijinfeichangremendeyibendoushishenghuoxiaoshuo，zuozheshilixianyu，zhurengongjiaolizianyumeilin，xiamianyiqilaikanxiashuodezhuyaoneirongshi：ruanfanyeshifan，dandejiangjiugechifa。shancunzhuixulizianoudexizhoufangshijidadechuancheng，daduosuishenlubangshen，yi、bu、xing、xiangyangyangjingtong，yaofengdelongjuan，yaoyufadashui。tachiruanfan，neizishijiangjiukejiudale。...
laopozichanshangyineishikendingde，keneixieqianbushiliziande，jiusuanyumeilinjitaqian，tayebuhuiyao，yinweineiyangdehuajiuzhenchenglechiruanfandele。
tayishenhuaijuexuedefangshi，taxuyaolaopoyanghuoma？
不需要的。
suoyi，fanruizheibianyishuoshengyi，lizianjiuxindongle。
“woheledashibaodetang，zhengzhuangjianqinglexuduo，woyouyijiacanyingongsi，quanguoyixianchengshidouyoufendian，woxiangmaidashidebaotangdemifang，nikanxingbuxing？”fanruichouzhelizian，yanshenzhizhongchongmanleqidai。
lizianxiaolexiao，xinzhongqueshiyipianshiwang。
tagujifanruijintianzaochenxinglaijiudonglexiangmaitamifangdeniantou，suoyichushoucaineimekuochuo，zhijierangmuchuntaozhuanfaleershiwandehongbao。
dangran，ershiwanduiyutazheizhongcengciderenlaishuohaizhenshixiaoqian。
fuwushengjiangliangbeitieguanyinfangzailezhuoshang，shuoleyiju：“qingmanyong。”
liziankanzhereqiyinyundechabei，xinlixiangzhezenmelaijujuezheigesuoweideshengyi。
fanruiyoubuleyiju：“dashi，qianzheifangmiannifangxin，wojueduibuhuikuidaini。”
liziankaikoushuodao：“fandage，zheihaizhenbushiqiandeshi，yishijiashiyouyiyanmifangjuebuwaichuan，ershineimifangbushichuzinengbaode，jiusuanwojini，ninaquyemeiyong。”
“zhende？”fanruiyifubutaixiangxindeyangzi。
lizianxiaolexiao：“wopiannizuoshenme，woyexiangzhuanqian，kezheiqianwozhuanbule。woyaoshimaijiniyifenninaqumeiyongdemifang，womenyihouhaizenmezuopengyou？”
“neiyounilaigongyingtangdihebaotangdecailiao，womenhehuojingying，nikanzenmeyang？”fanruihaishibusixin。
lizianyaoleyaotou：“wogongyingbule。”
neianshentangdehexintangdishilushenni，tashenshangnayouneimeduolushenni？
muchuntaochazuishuoleyiju：“fandage，ziannengchushoujinizhibing，bangnihuazaijienan，neiyijingshinidefufenle，nijiubuyaozaixiangzheneitangdemifangle。”
“hehe，shiwosuqile，dashi，woyichadaijiujingniyixia。”fanruiyishouduanzhechabei，yishoutuozhebeidi，jiangchabeiduizheliziandefangxiangjuleyixia，zuozuleyangzicaiheleyikoucha。
“fandagekeqile。”lizianyeduanqichabei，fuwushenggangbazheibeichaduanguolai，chatanggenkaishuiside，danduifangjingcha，tazenmeyedeyisiyixia，suoyitayetuoleyixiabeidi，coudaozuibianshaoshaodeheleyidian。
muchuntaoguanqiedidao：“nibupatanga？”
lizianxiaozheshuodao：“chuiyixia，heyidian，buaishi。”
taxinliquexiangzhe，yaoshiyumeilinyouzheimeguanxintajiuhaole。
fanruishuodao：“dashi，woyueleneigenvrenzuoyigeleduan，wojiushipeile，huitouwomenzailiao。”tayouduimuchuntaoshuoleyiju，“chuntao，nipeidashihehecha，woxianzoule。”
muchuntaoshuodao：“niquba。”
“zaijian。”lizianyeshuoleyiju。
fanruizoulejibuyoudaozhuanhuilai：“dashi，nineitanghenguanyong，wozheiyinianduojiuzuowanshuidezuihao，woshenmeshihounengzaihedaonibaodeanshentang？”
budenglizianshuohua，muchuntaobianshuodao：“zuowanniheshengxiadetangwodoufangzaibingxiangli，huitouwojinisongnijiaqu，nihewanlewozairangzianjinibao。”
fanruixiaozheshuodao：“neixing，wojiubudaraoerweile，huijian。”
sanrenhechabianchengleliangrenhecha，qifenyebianle。
“wozhenbuzhidaotaxiangmainidemifang，buranwojiutiqiangennishuole。”muchuntaodapoleliangrenjiandechenmo。
lizianshuodao：“meishi，tashishangren，hewodetangxiudaoshangji，ziranxiangzuochengyibishengyi。”
muchuntaoxiaoyingyingdidao：“kanbuchulainihaidongzuoshengyi，shimeilinjiejiaonideba？”
liziankuxiaoleyixia：“tabuzenmegenwoshuohua，taneimemang，tazenmehuijiaowozuoshengyi，woyebuhuizuoshengyi，zhishisuikoushuoshuo。”
muchuntaobuxiaole，zhidingdingdekanzhelizian：“zian，nibawodangpengyouma？”
“当然。”
muchuntaoshuodao：“woshuodepengyoukebushiyibandepengyou。”
lizianweiweilengleyixia，xinzhongmomingjinzhang，nandaotashuodeshinannvpengyou？
muchuntaoyoubuleyiju：“woshuodeshijiaoxindepengyou，zhiji。”
lizianzheicaisongleyikouqi，taxiaolexiao：“womenxiangshiyesuanyouyuan，nibawodangzhiji，wodangranyebanidangzhiji，zheiyoushenmehaoshuode。”
muchuntaoyouxiaole：“neihao，jiranwomenshijiaoxindepengyou，neinigenwoshuoshuonigenyumeilinjiujingshizenmehuishi，nimenzenmehuifenfangshui？”
lizianzheicaifaxianzijidiaojintadekenglile。
muchuntaoqiaoqilezuijiao：“nikan，ganggangcaishuobawodangjiaoxindepengyou，zheidoubugenwoliao，womensuanshenmejiaoxindepengyou？”
lizianyouxieyouyuyaobuyaoliao。
liaoba，neibijingshizijiadejiashi，erqieyebushishenmeguangcaideshi。
buliaoba，biezaixinliyenanshou，zheixieniantajiumeiyouyigekeyiqingsuxinshideduixiang。
“genwoliaoliaoba，meizhunwokeyibangnijiejuewenti。”muchuntaoxunxunshanyou。
lizianheleyikoucha，chenmolejimiaozhongcaikaikoushuodao：“neiburuxianliaoliaonizenmeyang，nishizuoshenmede？”
muchuntaodadafangfangdidao：“woxianzaimeishikegan，danwozhengzhunbeichuangye。wobashizuowaimaoshengyide，jingchangzaiguowai。womahewobazaiwoduchuzhongdeshihoujiulihunle，daoxianzaiwodoumeiyoujianzheta。neigeshihouwobahenkunnan，tachibulekujiugenwobalile。wosuanshidanqinjiatingzhangda，suoyixingziyoudianye。”
lizianyiweitabuhuishuoshenmesimideshiqing，quemeixiangdaotayikoujiubatadelaodidoujitale，yishijiantafandaoyoudianbuzhidaogaizenmemianduitale。
“nihaixiangzhidaoshenme，shengao、tizhong、sanwei？”muchuntaodezuijiaodaizheyisinairenxunweidexiaoyi。
lizianhuangmangshuodao：“zheigejiubuyaole。”
“gainila。”muchuntaojingjingdekanzhelizian，yanshenzhongmanshiqidai。
liziantanleyikouqi：“haoba，wojiushuojiniting，nitingzhejiushile，buyaoduibierenshuo。”
“zheihaiyongnishuoma，nikuaishuo。”muchuntaocuicudao。
lizianshuolexiaqu：“wohemeilinjiehun，neiqishishitaxuyaoyigerengentajiehun，neigeshihoutababingle……”
zheiyiliaojiushiyizhanchadeshijian。
zheixienianbiezaixinlidehuayixiazishuochulai，lizianganjuejiuxiangshibaxinlidelajisaolechuqudeganjue，ganjingle，yeqingsongduole。
“meixiangdaonihemeilinjiedehunyinshizheiyangde，nanguaitacongbutishuoni，wodaoshitingjianxiaomeiwenlehaojicitababaqunale。”muchuntaodeqingxuyeshoudaoleganran，youxiediluo。
liziankuxiaoleyixia：“tashuowoquhuoxingwameiqule。”
zheihuahaoxiao，keshimuchuntaoquexiaobuchulai：“nijiudasuanzheimeguoxiaquma？”
lizianchenmoleyixiacaishuodao：“zailaojiadeshihou，wobenlaixianggentajieshuzheiduanhunyin，keshitadaizhexiaomeihuilaile，wocaizhidaowoyougenver，xiaomeihaixiao，wobuxiangtazaimeiyoubabahuozhemamapeibandehuanjinglichengzhang，suoyi……zanshijiuzheiyangguoba。”
“nizheimeyoubenshiqueguozheiyangderizi，tayoudianguofenle，wodoutinigandaobuzhi，weiqu。”muchuntaochenzhelian，yifufenfenbupingdeyangzi。
lizianchouzhemuchuntao，xinlihaoqi，yeyoudianxiangbutong。
tabushiyumeilindeguimima？
tazheiyangpingjiataheyumeilindehunyin，ganjueyoudianguaiguaide。
muchuntaojilelizianyigebaiyan：“nikanzhe**shenme，wokeshizhanzainizheibiande。”
lizianxiaolexiao：“xiexie。”
buguanzheihuashizhenshijia，dantingzhehennuanxinwo。
“neiniyoushenmedasuan，niyishendebenshi，nandaojiuwozaijialidaihaizi，sihoutajialaotaitai？”muchuntaokuairenkuaiyu，“nixianga，yumeilinshishangshiqiyenvzongcai，tazaiwaimianhufenghuanyu，fengfengguangguang，danbuguantazuochuduodadechengji，nidoumeigonglao。xiaomeixianzaihaixiao，budongshi，dandengtazhangdayidian，tongxuewentababashizuoshenmede，nandaoniyaorangtashuowobabashizaijiazhufansihoulaotaitaidema？jieguojiushi，tahuichongbaitademama，qingkanni。”
liziandexinyoudianluanle。
tazhenmeixiangzheimeshenyuan，keshitingmuchuntaozheimeyishuo，tayoujuedetadehuayoudaoli。
“wozaiwenni，nimenjiehunzhiqian，tayoumeiyourangniqianhunqianxieyi？”muchuntaozhidingdingdekanzhelizian。
liziandianleyixiatou：“qianguo，woneifenbuzhidaonongnaqule，woyewangjishangmianxielexieshenmele。”
“hainengxieshenme，wojiushibukannimendehunqianxieyi，woyezhidaoruguonimenlihun，niyifenqiandoufenbudao。”
lizianxiaolexiao：“wobuyaotadeqian，bieshuofenjiachan，jiushitajiwoyebuyao。”
“你呀……”
“wojiushizheiyangderen。”
muchuntaotanleyikouqi，queyouxiaole：“nizhensha，yumeilinyesha，buzhidaozhenxini。”
lizianxiaodao：“nijiubupawogaosuyumeilinma？”
“nigaosuta，takendinglaiwenwo，wojiushuowomenzaijiudiankaifang，heduolehushuobadao。”muchuntaoshuo。
liziankuxiao，tanazheigenvrenmeizhe。
“suoyi，nideyougechouhua，**zijideshiye。”muchuntaobahuatilalehuilai。
lizianshuodao：“woyexiangzhaogeshizuo，zhishimuqianhaimeiyoushenmejihua。”
muchuntaodejiaoqingqingtilelizianyixia：“wotinichugezhuyizenmeyang？”
liziandunshilengleyixia，tahuranjiuzhaodaozhongwuzaicanzhuoxiatitadezhenxiongle，jiushimuchuntao，ganjueshiyiyangde。
“跟你说话呢。”
lizianhuiguoshenlai：“shenmezhuyi，nishuo。”
“womenyiqichengliyigegongzuoshiba。”muchuntaoshuo。
“呃，工作室？”
muchuntaoxiaozheshuodao：“mingzidouwoxianghaole，jiujiaopaiyougongzuoshi，womenjiuyongnideyishenjuexue，quanqiusirendingzhifuwu，kendingdayouqiantu。”
lizianxinzhongyidong：“nikuaishuoshuo。”
muchuntaoshuodao：“xianzaidefuhaosheishenshangmeigemaobing，yaomeshichuangyeshiqiluoxiadebinggen，yaomeshifadayihoujiuseguodutaokongleshenzi，nishuonidetangmaijitamen，tamenjiduoshaoqianheshi？haiyounidefangshijuexue，neixiefuhaozhaonisuangeming，bugegua，nijuedeshouduoshaoqianheshi？”
“你接着说。”
“erqie，zheixiezhishinikandejiandecaifu，zheishengyihaiyoukanbujiandecaifu，neijiushirenmai。nizhihaoyigefuhaohuozhedarenwu，tamenjiuqianniderenqing，niyaozaixianggandianbiedeshenme，nisuisuibianbianyigedianhua，neixierenhaibuzhengxiankonghoudebangniquban？”
lizianlele：“zhenkanbuchulaininaozizheimehaoshi，nizheigezhuyibucuo，nizaijiwoshuoshuokaigongzuoshidexijie，biruyaozhunbeixieshenme，yaoduoshaoqiancainengqidongshenmede。”
muchuntaoduanqilechabei，qianqiandexialeyikou：“jintianwanshangshidian，yumeilinshuilezhihou，nilaiwojia，womenzixitanjihua。”
liziandunshilengzailedangchang。
gunanguanvgongchuyishitanjihua。
不会是计划生育吧？
学神的心动通告
作者：岑星映梦
栏目：都市
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作者：会元的艾吉
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作者：爱吃饭的狼叔
栏目：都市
下乡后，我成了国宴大厨
作者：倒立的可乐
栏目：都市
老婆深夜点了次外卖后，我直接离婚
作者：人间豆子花
栏目：都市
未婚妻动了签筒，上上签要留给弟弟
作者：大神
栏目：都市
