xinxianchuludeduanpianyanqingxiaoshuo《zongyibierenqiushengzuorenwutatangpingchigua》jinqibeishouguanzhu，henduowangyouzaipinjianguohouduizuozhe“liyaoyao”dewenbizanbujuekou，wenlizhurengongchiqianlingqiandexingxiangbeikehuadexuxurusheng，jingmiaojuelundegushizhuyaojiangshudeshi：chimuzebudongzheigegeng，kandaotahongzheyan，xinlihuranyouxiebushiziwei。chiqianbijinghegujiarenxiangchuleshiduonian，tu……
“咕噜～～”
chiqiandeduzizaichangkongchengjile。
“nizaigujiameichiwancan？”
“tamenmangzhejiqinnverkaiqingzhuhui，naergudeshangwoa。”
chimuzewangchufanglizou，“nixiangchishenme，wojinizuo。”
chiqianzhangzuijiulai：“fotiaoqiang，hongshaoliji，maladusi……”
“只有面。”
“neilaigesuibianshenmemian，buyaoxiangcai。”
mianzuohao，chimuzeduandaochiqianmianqian，shoujixiangle。
hezongzhudalaijitahuibao，neigelinshizhulidequeyouwenti，zaiyingjitongdaojididuigongsidadianhua，beitajizhuadaole。
neifenwenjianyebeijielexialai。
hezongzhu：“chizong，xingkuininmingchaqiuhao，yibusansuan！yaoshizheifenwenjianbeitasongchuqu，zhenbuganxiangxianghuiyoushenmehouguo。”
neifenwenjianshiguanxiazhouchengdongkaifaanjingbiao，zheigejieguyanyaoshichulechacuo，qimasunshishigeyi。
chimuzetuchukouqi，“xianbatazhidaodeshiwachulai，zhihouzaibaojing。”
“好的。”
池浅居然说对了。
nanbuchengshitaconggujiatinglaide？
youhuozhezhenshineizhimao……
“jiu！jiuming！feilia！”chiqiancanjiaochusheng。
chimuzelikehuitou，neizhijumaobachiqianyazaishenxia，weibaluanshuaimiaomiaozhijiao。
chiqiantuijuzhetaderouzhuadahan：“bukeyi！niwozhongzubutong！qiangxingzaiyiqishibuhuiyouhaojieguode！”
dapangju：“miaomiaomiao！”genlebendayeyihoudainichixiangdehelade！
chiqian：“nagehaorenjiajuranbujimaomijueyua！jinhuohaiwozheiyangchunjiedemiaolingshaonv！”
yirenyimaonituiwojin，nipaowozhui，chachinanfei……
chimuzeejiaoyinyinchoudong，gangcaifuqideniantoukacasuiluo。
tajiushuoneizhonglipudeshiqingbukenengfasheng。
chimuzezouguoqubajumaocongchiqianbeishangnakai，“nichinide。”
yizhimaojiugounaotengle，xianzaihaiduolegechiqian。
xingkuitamingtianyaochucha，yanghaizizheishiyihoubuguitaguan。
jumaoaoaochongtajiao：ganshenmepohuaiwomenkuayuezhongzudekuangshijuelian！
chiqiansonglekouqi，chayidian，tajiuyaobeixiaomaomijizaotale！
shifengrixia！miaoxinbugu！
daodezainali，dixianzainali，chongwuyiyuanyouzainali？
chiqianbiansuomian，biandalianggongyusizhou。
tahuixiangqishulitidaodejuqing，xinxiangtamenlaochijia，zhenshifanpaijujidi。
quanjiarendoushifanpai，yigegezaijinannvzhushibanzidedaolushangyiqubufan。
ertazheigexiaofanpai……beinvzhujiaoguhuaxizouleqiyun，haihuilunweitahelingqianganqinglushangdetajiaoshi。
chiqianniejinquantou，tajiusuanshishitouyebujirendianjiao，zhihuiyazaitamendeguancaibanshang！
jirantianleibatapihuilaile，tajuebukenengrangzijiluodaoshulisuoxiedexiachang！
……denghuier，tadejiejuhaoxiangshibeinannvzhuhuohaidaoshentishuairuo，yingnianzaoga？
“啪叽。”
tingdaodongjing，chimuzehuitoukandaochiqianbianchenggexianyubingbingtanzaizhuoshang，“chiqian，nizenmele？”
“jiujiu。”chiqianliangyanfangkong，“wobuxiangnulile。”
shinianxiudeyangzhuchang，bainianxiuderentangping。
tayijingyangleshiniandezhu，nandaobuzhidehaohaoxiangfuma！
努什么力！
不干了！
chimuze：zheishiyounaonayang？
diertianyizao，chiqianpengzhebaowenbeiyiliankandanhongchendeyangzishanglechimuzedeche。
“nizenmele？”chimuzekanchutabuduijing，suikouyiwen。
“turanxiangkaile。”chiqianshouliwanrupengzhelianhua，lianshangxiemanlesidajiekong，“zhengsuoweiwomingyouwobuyoutian，nenghuoyitianshiyitian。congjintianqi，woyaoyangsheng。”
多活一天就是赚到。
“……suoyinidaigebaowenbei？”
“limianshijiabingkele。”
“不是要养生？”
“suoyiwohaijialejikegouqijinqu。”
chimuzezuijiaoyichou，zheishishenmedanxingpasi，xuanxueyangsheng？
kuaidaochijiazhiqian，chimuzedingzhuchiqian：“chiqian，daolewaigongjiayihouhaohaobiaoxian，zhengquliuxialai。”
“表现？”
“dui，waigonghentaoyanxiaohaizi。”
chiqianzhengyuanleyan，“neinihaisongwoqu。”
“zheiyeshiweinihao。”chimuzexiangdaoduduanzhuanheng，kanbibaojunyibandefuqin，duichiqiannengfouliuxialaibubaotaidaqiwang。
buguo，chiqianhetamenbenjiumeishenmeganqing，tayaozaichijiazhanwenjiaogen，zuihaodebanfajiushigenzaifuqinshenbian。
zhiyaonengrangfuqinduitayouyisilianxi，neimetazaichijiadediweijiuhuibutongyiban。
chimuzesulelianse，danxinchiqianbushangxinyushikonghe：“ruguonibunengliuzaiwaigongjiali，niyihoukenenghuiwujiakegui。”
chiqian：wujiakegui＝esijietou＝tiqianyingnianzaoga。
这还得了！
“jiu，nifangxin，zheishibaozaiwoshenshang，yizhunwanwan！”chiqianpaizhexiongfubaozheng。
“？”
“woshishuonijinguanfangxin！”
chimuzekantadeyangzi，shizaibunengfangdexiaxin。
chezikaijinyitiaozhangzhidewutongdadao，chuanguolinyinqianmianshiyipiankaikuodecaopinglvdi，sisifangfangdehuawencizhuanyilupudaojingzhidediaoxiangpenshuichiqian。
yizuozhuangyansumu，youyabushiguiqidezhuangyuanchengbaochuxianzaijintou，menkouhaiyouzhifushouweikanshou，xuyaotongxingzhengcainengjinru。
chiqianyilianyihuo，“jiu，womenyaocanguanwanchengbaozaiqujianwaigongma？”
不然来这干嘛？
chimuzefengqingyundandidao：“zheijiushiniwaigongdejia。”
“waigongbushigetuixiuxiaolaotouma？zenmezheimeyouqian？！”
zheidouzhushanghaohuababidachengbaole！
tuixiuxiaolaotoudechenghudouxiaolechimuze，“chijiadexiguanshigaodiaozuoshi，didiaozuoren。”
“yiqiansuanmingdeshuoguhuaminggebuhao，jialibunengtaizhangyang。suoyiwomenyizhiyinmanjiashi，batadangputongxiaohailaiyang。”
“guhuameilaiguozheili？”
“ng，woshuoguowaigongbuxihuanxiaohaizi，ziranyebaokuota。”
chiqiandunshiduizheigehaiweijianmiandewaigongchanshenglejidadehaogan。
zhiyaobuxihuannannvzhu，neijiushitadepengyou！
chimuzedaizhechiqianjinlezhuangyuanneibu，pengshangyigeshenchuanshenheiseduijinxizhuangdezhangzhedaizherenzouguolai。
tafasihoushuluchuyizhangjijuweiyanhelengmodemianrong，biliangshangjiazhejinsebobianyanjing，yanshenlengliyoutouzheguliuqinburendehen。
gengzhongyaodeshitameijiaoyoudaoyiziba，zhayiyankanquhenshixionge，nenghekuxiaohai。
“nizheishihouhuilaiganshenme？”chilisentingxiajiaobu，kanzheturanchuxianzaizheidedaerzi。
“ba，woshunlubachiqianjininsongguolai，yihuierjiuyaoqujichangchucha。”chimuzebachiqiansongshangqianqu。
chilisenkanyemeikanchiqian，zhoumeibuyue：“jiwo？woshenmeshihoushuoyaojiantale？sheijinidequanlishanzuozhuzhang？”
jiusuanduizheqinerzi，chilisendoumeiyouguosuoweidefuziwenqing。
hekuangshilijiachuzouduonianlianainaonvershengdexiaolianainao。
chiqianjuede，biqibudaijianziji，tawaigongyanliyagenjiukanbudaota。
“fuqin，chiqianzaigujiashoulebushaoweiqu，jingshenzhuangkuangbutaihao，wobufangxintayigerenzhu。”chimuzejieshi。
chilisen：“jialidebaomusijuele？”
“baomutidaibulejiarendepeiban，zheiyeshiwomenqiantade。”chimuzetanlekouqi，“chiqianheguhuadeshenfencuowei，womenzhishaoyaofuyibandezeren。”
chilisenyijiubanzhelian，buguosonglekou：“tazainali？”
chiqianwanwanmeixiangdao，waigongkanbudaota，shiyinweitataiaile……
tataitoutingxiong，shangqianyaojiwaigongliuxiayigehaoyinxiang。
jieguozhuangyuanlideyongrendasaotairenzhen，dibanbujinkanqilaiguanghua，shijishangyehen……hua。
chiqianyizhijiaocaimaichuqu，bushoukongzhidixiangqianyihua，jiuneimezhitingtingdizuozaidishang。
当场来了个劈叉。
断卡断亲后，他们跪求我这个“穷酸”提款机
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