第一章 女神要遭殃

zhengsuoweimeibumeikantui,yaobuyaokanyao,wogaozhongshidaidetongzhuozhaomanjiushizheimegeyoumeiyouyaodenvren。

kexiwogentameishajiaoji,woshigexiaoquwuyeyuan,tazeshishiliguangbotaideboyinyuan,tiantianjianshenlvyouchurugaodangchangsuo,fapengyouquandoushigezhongwanghongdakadihuozhemeimeide**。

zheitiantayoufalegepengyouquan,juzhejiandaoshou,xiaochulianggexiaojiuwo,zhangfapijianbojingxuebai,haishichunsuyan**,zheshihaokan。

buguowofaxiantabiliangshangzhanglegehongsededoudou,zhenghaozaibijianshang,feichangshaojian。

dajiadouzhidao,renshanghuolebiziliangbianrongyizhangdou,neijiaoyingxiangxuedou,yibanbuhuiduiyunshiyouyingxiang,danbijianshangzhangdoujiubuxunchangle,neijiaoyayundou-renzhibiliangxiangdangyufangzhifangliang,yayunbianbusanmei,bachengjiuyaodaomei。

zaikanzhaomansuiranxiaorongmanmian,danmeijiandeyintangyouyimogenqiyujifuyansebutaiyiyangdehuianse,eryintangxueshibiliangmoduanzhishao,youdenggaowangyuandeyunshizhishuo,ciyunshihuian,jiushuomingyaodaomeile。

wodangshijiujuede,zhaomanzheiliangtiandechudianshi,kanchengdugujiyaojianxuele。

shuodaozheilikenengyourenyaowen,niyigexiaowuye,zahuikanxiangni?yuanyinhenjiandan,woyeyeshifengshuixiangshi,jiushiniandaihundefengshengshuiqi,jiaolewobushaoxiangmenfazi。

kexitaxianzaiyijingqushile,qushiqianzhijiwoliuleyibenjiaozuo《tianditaiqingshenjian》deshu,shuoshiwomenlaolijiademinggenzi,yidingyaobaoguanhao。

dantayoujinggaowobushisidaolintoudeshihoubuzhunkan,wentaweishatayebushuo。

shuohuizhaoman,tade**zhaowokanzhezhenxinganjuebuduijing,jiusigezi,xueguangzhizai。

benzheshanyitixingdexiangfa,wojitafalegepinglun:"laotongxue,zuijinduozhuyitoushangwujian,biebeidongxizale。"

wozhisuoyirangtazhuyitoushang,shiyinweitademeiyunlaiziyintangxueheyayunxue,liangzhedoushigaoshi,yincimeiyunlaizitouding,birufengshan、gaokongpaowuzhileide。

zhaomanbuyihuierhuifuwo:"shenjingbingani,huibuhuishuohua?"

zhaomanzheigeqingchunmiaomandexiandaidameinvxianranbuxin,woyejiubuduoshuole,huangzheyaochidaoxiaoquzouzou,kankanxinbanlaideyezhuyoumeiyoupiaoliangnver。

haimeiliuretui,wofaxiangaozhongtongxuedeweixinqunzhale,pingshiwannianqianshuidelaotongxuequanmaolechulai。

"zhaomanmaixinfangle,bukuishiwomendemeinvxueba,taihuizhuanqianle!"

"tashuole,zhoumodajiajuju,taqingke。"

"taneifangzishishiqudefushixiaoyangfang,haiyougexiaohuayuan,hualesibaiduowan,ai,xianmua。"

woyikandajiadouzaishuozhaomanmaixinfangbuyouhuangrandawu。

qishiwozhiqiankantazhaopianyoudianyihuo,yinweizhaomanmingmingyaodaomeile,danyintangqueshibaomande,biliangshangdehongdousuiranyayun,danyoubunengyazhuzhenggebiliang,faneryoudianxiangjinshangtianhuayiban,zheihenmaodun,meiyunhaoyuncouyiqile。

xianzaiwodongle,zhaomanmaifangzile,zheishihaoyun,danfangziyoudianwenti,yincitayaodaomei。

zheishi,tongxuemendeyilunhuatibuzhiweihezhuanyidaolewoshenshang。

yirenshuo:"nimenkanlezhaomandepengyouquanma?zhaomanxiawufa**,beilishiyiqihuaile,hahaha。"

"neigeshensuanziyoukaishizuoyaole,zhenyiweizijishibanxian?xiaosirenle。"

"baohuwofangzhaoman,dadaolishiyi!"

zheixiehuayoudiaokanyeyoueyi,woyijingxiguanle,gaozhongshangxueneihuierkemeishaoyinweifengshuishisunzideshenfenbeizheibangsunzichaoxiao。

wobenbudasuanlihui,jieguoyourenaitewo:"@lishiyi,chulaisuanming,hahaha。"

zheirenjiaowangdong,dushuneihuierjiugenwobuduitou,tayizhizhuiqiuzhaoman,danshizhongshibai,youjianwogenzhaomantongzhuoliangnian,jiuduiwoyouyuanyan。

wolulegemian:"wangdong,tingshuonizuijinfafule,nishenziguxiao,youshigangongdide,zenmekenengfafuni?jianyinigaodianrenzhonghuangchichi,buranyuelaiyuepang。"

wangdongxianranbeiwoshuozhongleyaohai,zijiyehenyihuozijiweishafapang。

tajiuwenwo:"renzhonghuangshisha?zhongyao?"

"shishi,niyitianchisanci,bachangzitukongjiubuhuipangle。"

"我去尼玛!"

qunligengjiarenaole,erzhaomanyelumian,tafalegesisiwenwendeweixiao:"dajiabuyaochaojiae,jidezhoumojuhui,wodaihuiquxinfangkankan,gongrenhaizaidengwoni。"

qunlilaotongxuefenfenshuohao,henbudegenzhaomanduoliaojiju。

woxunsizheyeshuoleyiju:"nijintianyunshihencha,wanshangyinqisheng,nimeiyunyoulaizitouding,quannibuyaoquxinfangle,nizhuanduobuanquan。"

wozheihuayichu,qunlizhaguole,yiduirenmawobuhuishuohua。

zhaomanyeqidebuqing:"lishiyi,yaobushikanzaiwomenshilaotongxuedefenshang,wozaolaheinile!"

tamawanxiaxianle,haishiyaoqukanxinfang。

qunlidetongxuejixuduiwo,shuowozuibachou,buhuishuohuabieshuohua。

woyemeidali,dakaxiabanhuizufang。

caizoudaobanlu,qunlihudiyiduirenaitewo,wodakaiyikan,meigerendoushuoxiemen。

"wokao,zhaomangangcaikaichedaoxinfanglouxia,hudiyikuaizhuantouzatacheqiangaishang,zhijiezaaole!"wangdongzheixiaozizhudonggenwoshuoyuanyou。

yuanlaigangcaizhaomanzaiqunlifalezhangzhaopianbaoyuan,shuotadechezibeizhuantouzaaole,zhuantoucongxinfangloudingdiaoxialaide,yebuzhidaoshisheidiude。

"lishiyi,nimengduileyihuia!"henduotongxuezaidiaokanwo,youyuzhaomanmeiyoushi,suoyidajiabudanxin。

danwoqueganjueshiqingyanzhongle,zhuantouliyingzaren,dantaquezaleche,zheishi"pocai"zhixiang,shijiaporenwangdemeiyun,shuobaile,zhaomanbushishoushangneimejiandan,tahaidepochan。

wozhijiezaiqunlishuoyiju:"zhaoman,niquzhaodahuoji,dazheleshuzaijianbangshang,liangjianlunliushusanfenzhong。"

rendejianbangyouyanghuo,zhaomanxianzaidaomeitoule,yanghuohuian,dexianyongwaihuolanyuchongshu,aoguojinwanzaishuo。

zhaomandangjifahua:"lishiyi,womeikonglini,wozhaobaoxiangongsilaituocheni。"

qunlidetongxueyekaishilehele,shuowoxiangchenjigoudanvshen,zhuangmozuoyangjisheikanni。

wobutaileyile,laotongxuedeqingfenyongwanle,jiexialaideshoufeile。

"zhaoman,shifenzhongneinizhundezhaowo,daoshihoujiwofaliangqiankuai,buranbiezhaowo。"woliuxiayijuhua,xinliyoudianhuo。

qunlichixuzhaguo,lengchaorefengzibubiduoshuo。

zhaomanyagenmeiliwo,eryanchouzhehenkuaijiuyaoguoshifenzhongle。

qunlidelaotongxueyegegedengzheyanjingkanwoxiaohua,wangdongneigeershashenzhizaiqunlidaojishile。

buliaotadaojishidaolesan,zhaomanhudifaletiaoyuyin:"wodetiana,sanloudediaoshanturandiaole,zazaiwojianbangshang,hesiwole,haihaomeiyoukaifengshan。"

neifengshanyaoshikaile,zhaomangujidebeiqietou。

qunlixianshisijileyixia,ranhouzhongrenfenfenmengquan,yigegekaishiaitewo。

zhaomanyewenyixia:"lishiyi,zaima?"

womeiyoulihui,yinweixianzaishizuoshengyile,zhaomanzaimeizaisaoyebunenghuaileguiju。

jianwomeiyoulumian,zhaomanjile,kaishigenwosiliao:"lishiyi,wojiujingshizenmehuishia?haoheren,wodoukule。"

我依然没有回应。

zhaomanyouhuiqunliwen:"nimensheiyoulishiyidianhua,zhaotayixia,kuaidiana。"

"sheiyoua?womendahuohaoxiangdougentameilianluoba?"wangdongyebangmangxunwen。

"tagangcaishuo,yaoliangqiankuaiqian。"yourentixing。

"bushiba?zhenyaoliangqiankuai?laotongxuebuzhiyuzheiyangba?"yiqunrenzaiqunlibufen,tizhaomanweiqu。

raner,zhaomanjiwofaqianle,haifaleyuyin,kukutitiyouruanmianmiandeyuyin。

"lishiyi,nikuaibangbangwo,qiunile,gangcaixinfangdetianhuabanturantaleyijiao,yaobushigongrenbawolakai,wojiubeizasile!"