第1章
congyuqingshan，shanjianxiaoyuan。
shifuguwannianjiangchenfanjiudaoleketingzuohao。
“chenfan，woyaosile。”
guwannianyinchendidingzhechenfan，ningzhongdishuodao。
陈凡一听吓了一跳：
“shifu，woguannimaixiangpingwen、liansehongrun、qixuewangsheng，mingmingjiuhenjiankang，zenmekenenghuisi！”
“zaishuoniyishugaochao，keshibeitianxiarenchengzhiweidangdaiyisheng，meiyouzhibuhaodebing，jibiannishentichuwentiyenengzijizhia！”
guwanniantingdaozheihua，meihaoqidipailechenfandenaodaiyixia。
“chouxiaozi！nizheimedalehaibujiehun，gengshimeigehoudai，weishizheishiyaobeinihuohuoqisi！”
guwannianpaileyixiahaibujieqi，tazhijieshenchushouningzhuchenfandeerduo。
ziguyilai，doushifumucuihun。
erguwannianhechenfansuiranshishitu，danyeqingtongfuzi，suoyichenfandehunshiyouguwannianlaicui。
陈凡疼得急忙求饶：
“tong！shifukuaifangshoua！”
“woheniyizhiyinjuzaizheishenshanlaolinzhizhong，lianmuhouzidoumeiyizhi，gengbieshuoshinvrenle。”
“wodaoshixiangyaojiehunshengzi，keshiwoshangnazhaoqua！”
guwanniansihudengdejiushizheijuhua。
tasongkailechenfandeshou，zhuanshenconghuaizhongtaochuyikuaiyupei。
“chouxiaozi，suannizouyunyudaowozheimeyigehaoshifu！”
“weishiwoshenmouyuanlv，zaojiusuanzhunlenixiaozizhangdalekendingqubudaolaopo。”
“suoyizainixiaoshihou，wojiujinidingleyimenwawaqin。”
“jiangbeishitangjiadenverchushengdeshihoujiuhuanjuezheng，yuanbenhuobuguoershiersui。”
“tanglaoyeqiuwolixiahunyue，zhiyaonenggoujiutanver，tajiuyuanyibanverjiajiwodechuanren。”
“jinnianzhenghaodaolelvxinghunyuedeshihou，nijiudaizhezheikuaiyupeigankuaixiashanquzhihaoniweilailaopodebing，ranhouwanhunba。”
guwannianshuozhe，jiangyupeirengjilechenfan。
陈凡接过玉佩一愣。
这是要赶自己下山？
这可不行！
zaizheiliyouchiyouzhu，xiaoyaozizai，chenfancaishebudelikai。
“shifu，wobuzou！woyaoshifengninlaorenjiayibeizi！”
陈凡高声说道。
guwannianqueqiaoqierlangtui，douzhejiaoshuodao：
“aiya，neishizaikexile。”
“kexileneitangshuangxiaojie，tazhangdexiangxiannvyiyang，shenduanquxianneigeyoumei，pifuneigejiebai，youqiyishuangtuigengshiyouzhiyouzhang……”
chenfantingdaolezheili，yanjingmingliangqilai。
古万年继续跟着说：
“tangshuangbengaishinideweihunqi，yihouhenitangzaiyizhangchuangshangshuijuedemeiren。”
“kexiniquebuyuanyiququta，neimetajiuzhinengyibeizidushoukongfangle，huozhebianyibiedenanrenle。”
“bingqienibushiyizhixiangyaozhaochushahainiqinshengfumudechourenma？zaijiangbeishizhizhongyijingchuanchuleyixiexiaoxi……”
chenfantingwanzaiyerenbuzhu。
tadangjizhanqilaizhengseshuodao：
“shifu，ninlaorenjiayigerenzaishanshangzijibaozhong！”
“gurenshuobuxiaoyousanwuhouweida，woyaoshibujiehunshengzineicaishiduininzuidadebuxiao！”
“suoyidizixianzaijiuxiashanqulvxinghunyue，zheicaishiduininlaorenjiazuidadexiaojing！”
shuowan，chenfandangjishoushihaoxingli，yiliuyanjiupaochuledashan。
doushuoshanxiadehuahuashijielidenghongjiulv、zhizuijinmi，jianzhijiushirenjiantiantang。
以前陈凡还不信。
dangtalaidaojiangbeishizhihou，zhongyuxiangxinle。
mandajiedeguniang，qingchun、piaoliangyoushishang！
那小脸蛋！啧啧！
那小蛮腰！啧啧！
那大长腿！啧啧！
……
chenfanliulianwangfan，zhongyuyishidaoleshenmejiaozuomeimiaorensheng。
danshichenfanyelaojishifudejiaohui，neijiushiyehuameiyoujiahuaxiang。
zijidelaopo，caishizuihaode！
dangjichenfananzhaoshifutigongdedizhi，xunsuchaozhemudedierqu。
shifushuoguo，jintianshitangjiatanglaoyedewushidashou，tongshiyeshijianvzhiri，qiudejiushiyigeshuangxilinmen。
dangchenfanlaidaotangjiadeshihou，guoranjiandaozheilizhangdengjiecai，yifuxiqingdemoyang。
zaitangfumenkoudetingchepingshang，gengshitingmanlegezhonghaoche。
“yuanlaizheilijiushiwolaopojia？haizhenshiqipai！”
chenfanxingchongchongdijiuyaowangtangfulitouzouqu。
ranercaidaomenkou，chenfanjiubeibaoanjilanzhule。
“yaofandesiyibianqu！xialeyanma？”
“zhenshihuiqi，haibukuaigun！”
baoankanchenfanchuanzheyishenshanlirendelaojiuyifu，caizheyishuangxiangjiaoxie，beishanghaibeizheyigezhulou，yushibaoanxiayishijiujiangchenfandangchengshiqigaile。
陈凡急忙解释：
“wobushiyaofande，woshilaiquxifude，tongshiyeshilaijiwoweilailaozhangrenzhushou！”
保安没好气骂道：
“quxifuzenmepaodaotangjialaile？shaozaizheilihubianluanche！”
“gankuaijilaozigun！fouzexinbuxinlaozidaduannidetui！”
baoanmazhe，jiuxiangyaoshenchushoujiangchenfanjituikai。
陈凡却大声说道：
“我劝你别动我！”
“yinweiwoyaoqudexifu，jiushitangjiadexiaojietangshuang！”
“woweilaidelaozhangren，jiushitangjiadelaoyetangtianxu！”
“yihouwokeshitangjiadeguye！”
zheihuayichu，baoandaile。
jiulianzhouweijinjinchuchudebinkemen，yequandouniuguotoulai，jingyadichaozhechenfankanlai。
gangcaihairenaofeifandetangfumenkou，xunsubiandeyaquewusheng。
tamendemuguang，youruzaikanyige……shazi！
“hahahahahaha……”
所有人都哄堂大笑。
tamenjiufangfotingdaoleshenmehaoxiaodexiaohuayiyang，xiaodaowuzheduzi。
ququyigexiaoqigai，jingranshuoyaoqutangjiaxiaojietangshuang？
tayebusapaoniaozhaozhaojingzi，kankanzijineifudexingpeima？
简直可笑！
“chaoshenmechao？fashengshenmele！”
zhijiancongtangfuzhizhong，zouchuleyiduizhongnianfufu。
nandekanshangqusishiduosuiwushisuideyangzi，tashenxingfafu，chuanzheyishenguangxiandexifu。
nvderongmaoyanli，suiranyeyousishiduosui，danshikanshangqubuguosanshichutoudemoyang。
zheiliangren，zhengshitanglaoyetangtianxuhefurendinglan。
baoanjimangjianggangcaifashengdeshiqinggaosuleliangfufu。
tangtianxuyiting，qidehuomaosanzhang：
“siyaofande，ganlaiwodeshouyanshangnaoshi？”
“wokannishinaodaiyoubingba？kuaigun！”
chenfantingdaozheihua，likebianbo：
“womeiyoubing，youbingderenshini。”
“woyijingkanchu，nideshenhenxu，xudaomeizuoyongdedibu！”
yishengguwanniandeneixiebenshi，quandoubeichenfanjixuehuile。
suoyichenfanyiyanjiukanchuletangtianxushentidewenti。
ertadehuayichu，zhouweidebinkemendouluchuguguaidexiaorong。
tangtianxuliansejubian，biandeyouhongyoubai。
jingranbeirendangzhongshuoshenhenxu？
zheishiduiyigenanrendechaoxiao！
jinguan……taqueshiyouzheizhongnanyanzhiyin，danshizheizhongshizenmekenengchengren？
“你……你放屁！”
“nicaixu，niquanjiaxu！”
tangtianxubuyoudedashengbianjie。
dinglanweilezhangfudelianmian，wunaizhixiayezhinengzhanchulaibangqiang：
“wonengzhengmingwojialaotangshentikebangle，wanquanshizheigejiaohuazizaizheilihuyanluanyu，zheigejiaohuazicaiyoubing！”
chenfanquezhizhedinglanshuodao：
“你也有病！”
“niyueshiwenluan，baidaiyichang。”
dinglantingdaozheihua，xiunujiaojia。
“nibizui！nizheigechouyaofande！wogenbenmeibing！”
她气得直跺脚。
jinguandinglandeshentiqueshiyouchenfansuoshuodewenti，danshitacaibukenengdangzhongchengren。
chenfankanzhenaoxiuchengnudetangtianxuhedinglanfufu，buyoudeqiguaidizhualezhuazijidetou。
“zheishanxiaderenhaoqiguaia，weishenmemingmingyoubingdoubuyuanchengrenni？”
很快陈凡恍然大悟。
是脸面！
zhengdangchenfangantanzijimingwudeshihou，zhijuedeyanqianhuranyiliang。
zhijianyigemeinvcongtangfuzhongzoulechulai。
zheigenvzikanshangquershichutou，dangzhenyourushifusuoshuo，taliandanzhangdexiangxiannv，shenduanlinglong，pifuxuebai，yishuang**youzhiyouzhang！
chenfandingjingyikan，ranhouturanzhizhemeinvdajiaoqilai：
“你也有病！”
“bingqie，nidebingzuiyanzhong！”
“yaoshimeiyouwochushoujiuzhini，nihuobuguoyitian！”
“yi？nizheibing……womingbaile，nijiushiwodeweihunqitangshuang！”