第1章
“erge，womenchuquba，yaoshitaxingle，youyaodawomenle！”
“tadoushuileyitianyiyele，buhuichushenmeshileba？”
“fangxinba，quancunrendouchushile，tayebuhuichushi！”
zhangxuefenghuanhuanzhengkaiyanjing，zongganjueerbianyourenzaishuohua，nandaoshangtiantanghaiyouqitarengentayiqi？
“咦？”
zhangxuefengdengdaleyanjing，zheishinali？maocaowu，haidaitouguangde，nibaqiang，manqiangkengkengwawa，haiyouyigepolandechuanghu，beirenyongsongmaojidushangle......
这是天堂？
她这是下地狱了吧！
zhangxuefengbuyoudehuiyiqitadaodizuoleshenmetiannurenyuandeshi，sihouyaolaidaozheizhongdifang。
“haishijinqukankanba，yaoshitazhendesile，xiaoxinzhangjiadaoshihoulaizhaowomenmafan！”
jinjiezhe，fangmenbeidakai，suijiyizhenlengfengguanlejinlai，dongdetahenhenyiduosuo！
shide，tajurandaduosuole！
zhangxuefengshayanle，tashijuezhengwanqi，jinguanbianmaijiachan，kezuihouhaishizoudaoleshengmingdejintou，benyiweizijinengshangtiantangde，meixiangdaozhengyanjiushipowuzi，ganggangtahaidalegeduosuo，suihoujiujigexiaoluobudingqishuashuadezhanzaitachuangqian，tazhenggerendoumengle。
beizixia，zhangxuefenghenhendeqialezijiyixia，tong！
tameisi，neizheilishinali？
yanqiandejigexiaoluobudingshenshangchuanzhepopojiujiudemianao，zuidadeneige，kanshangqushiersansuideyangzi，zhichuanleyijiandamanbudingdedanyi，xiaodejigeshenshangdemianaomianqiangnengkanchulaishimianao，dalengtiande，xiaodelianggeluobudingbizixiafanghaiguazheliangguaqingliangqingliangdeqingbiti。
naoziliyongruxuduojiyidepianduan，naoziyoudianhunluan，zhangxuefengbaibaishou，tashizaishishuobuchuhualai。
“kandaoleba，wojiushuo，takendingmeishi，jiushilan！erge，womenkuaichuqu！”
“kuaizou，yaoburantayouyaodarenle！”
suizhejigexiaoluobudingpaochuqu，linliedehanfengchuilejinlai，zhangxuefengbenjiutouhunnaozhang，zaizheilengfengxia，tengtongjuranhaolebushao，tadaidaidewangzhedadachangkaidemumen。
tameishangtiantang，yemeiqudiyu，tachuanyuele！
yigeyongancundeguafu，gangjiajinmenjitian，zhangfushangshandalie，yiqubuhui，congci，tajiuchenglechengjiadeguafu，
yuanshenzhangxuefengshigeqipa，tashigefudimo，taniangjiadieshicanji，yitiaotuiduanle，niangjiayougedidi，zheigezhangxuefengni，meirijiubapojiadedongxiwangniangjiaban。
chengjiarenkouduo，zijiaderizidounanguo，meiduojiu，zheipojiajiubeibankongle，gancuijiuqifuqijigexiaoshuzihexiaoguzilai。
“gongxisuzhubangdingxibaixitong！”
“wanchengyicixibaixingdong，jikehuodeyijifen！”
什么玩意儿？
zhangxuefengcongchuangshangpaqilai，zaizijishenshangsixiamosuo，tamodaolezijinaohoushi，quetengdetadaochouleyikouliangqi，tagubushangzijihounaoshaodeshang，xinxiangzhe，zheishengyincongnaerchulaide，nandaoyouerji？
jiuzaizhangxuefengmosuozhiji，tanaohaizhonghuranchuxianleyigeleisiyingmudedongxi，takandaolehaoduodongxi，youxiandaide，yougudaide，shenmedongxiyingyoujinyou，buguo，zheixiedongxizhishizaitayanqianyishanjiuguoqule，suiji，pingmushangxianshi，tadejifenweiling，xuyaotaxibai，cainenghuodejifen，duihuandongxi。
“erlang，jinisaozishengyiwanquba！”
gebifangjianchuanlaileyidaoshayaqiechenzhongdeshengyin，suihou，bianshiyizhenjuliedekesousheng。
“niang，niduohedianba！”
“jiaonijinisaozishengyiwan，niqujiushile，kuaiqu！”
buduoshi，zhangxuefengdemenqianjiuchuxianleneigeshiersansuidenanhaier，taqichongchongdeduanzheyiwantang，kandoubukanzhangxuefeng，zhongzhongdejiangwanfangdaopojiudezhuozishang，zhuozisuijihuangdonglejixia，saleyixietangshuichulai，tayebuguan，zhuanshenjiuchuqule。
zhangxuefengshiele，tasiqian，bannianmeijinshi，quankaoneixieguanziweichishengming，tadoukuaiwangle“chi”shishenmeganjue。
kedengtalaidaozhuobian，zhuoshangneiyiwanqingtangguashuidedongxi，batashengqilaideshiyu，yidianyidianmomiele。
jizhangyecaiyezixixishushudepiaozaiwanbiaomian，wanli，nengyinyuekandaoliangdiyou，xiaoxiaodeyidian，xiangyigexiaoxiaodejuhao，napazhishizheiyangdedongxi，tahaishixuanzeduanqiwanlai，minzuichanglechangweidao，henguadan，yecaideweidaohenzhong，kusekusede。
jinguanshizheiyang，kezhangxuefenghedehaishihenxiaoxin，taxixiganshouzhekouzhongdekusedandandihuakai，ganshouzhetangzhishunzhehoulongyidianyidianliuxiaqu，tahaoxiangzhaodaolemeishengbingzhiqiandakuaiduoyideganjue，manzudexiaole。
“niang，womendoubugouchile，nihaijitasongqugansha？”
“erge，nichiwodeba！”
“keke！buguanzenmeshuo，neidoushinidesaozi！erlang，heniangzheiwanba，wobue！”
zheiyangpojiudenibaqianggenbenmeishageyinxiaoguo，zhangxuefengjiangtamendehuatingdeqingqingchuchu。
hewanleyiwantang，tazoudaochuangyan，zuoxialaizhenglinaozilineixiejiyi，yuanshenchengleguafu，jiazhongyoubingzhongdepopo，haiyoujigexiaoshuzihexiaoguzi，zuidadeneigecaishisansui，haiyougeshisuidelaosan，laosihelaowushilongfengtai，jinnianqisui，laowu，yejiushizuixiaodeneige，shigexiaoguniang！
yanxiayongancunkuaiyaorudongle，jiazhongmeiledingliangzhu，jialidechaihuodoubugoule，gengbuyaoshuoxiushanfangwule，zhenzhenhanfengpumianerlai，zhangxuefengshouleshouyishang，shangbeizi，tayanzhuzikanzhezijideshengmingyidianyidianzoudaojintou，tabuxiangsi，weileyanzhangxingming，tabuximailezijifendouleshiduoniandefangzi，mailechezi......kezuihou，tulaowugong。
rujin，laotianyeyoujiletayicijihui，neime，tajiubuhuizaiqingyifangqi！
zhishi，neigeshenmexibaixitong......zhangxuefengbishangyanjing，tajide，zijihaoxiangshizainaohaizhongkandaole，tabishangyanjinghou，naozilixiangzhexibaixitong，neidongxijiuzhendechulaile。
tanengqingxidekandaoneiyikuaidapingmu，shangmiande“0”shifendexianyan。
taxiangzheshenshouhuadongyixiapingmu，pingmuzhendejiudongle，yigejifen，nengduihuanyikebangbangtang，takandaozheili，renbuzhuxiaole，yikebangbangtang，zheishibazijidangchengshenmele？
suizhepingmugundong，takandaolegezhongshiwu，shenmefangbianmian，shenmehuoguo......shenzhihaiyouhaixiandacan，takandekoushuizhiliu，kedangtakandaoxiamianxuyaodejifenshi，buyoudejiangkoushuiyanlehuiqu，sanbaijifen！
tahaimeigaoqingchuzenmezhuanjifenni，sanbaijifen，haishisuanleba！