第1章

第1章

“wuwu,niang,nibiesi,nibiediuxiahuihui!niang,nibiesi!”

wuwawadekushengchaodewenwantouteng,renbuzhutaishouhuluanpaileyixia,chushenghechi:“sheijiadexiaohaizi,chaosile!”

这是谁的声音?

wenwanlengzhule,mengranzhengkaiyan,yingruyanliandeshifengchuicaodidewuding,xisongdegancaotouzheweiruodeguangliangzhaojinzheijiancaopeng,genguoqucaiyuanlikancaidecainongdajiandelinshizhusuochabuduo。

tabushijiuhuoshaosilema?

这是哪里?

shenxiatangdeshiyiduigancao,chaoshixingchou。

zaikanmianqian,yigesiwusuidehaizidengzheyishuangjingedeyanjingwangzheziji,zangxixi、zhongzhangdelianshangguazheleihenhebiti。

shenshangdedebudingyifuhaishidarendejiuyifucaijiande,pengpengsongsongdeguazaishouxiaodeshenshang,kuzigenghanchen,yigekutuizhang,yigekutuiduan,jiaoshangdebuxielouzhejiaozhitou,manshinitu。

zheishi,sheijiameirenyaodehaizi?

ditoukankanziji,laolansedecubuguazi,geboshangdazhebuding,heisedekuzimeiyouyaodai,yongshengzibangzhe,nanguaiyaojianledehuang。

这是么回事?

“niang!”xiaojiahuopujinwenwanhuailiyibabitiyibaleidekuqilai。

娘?

她的娃?

yaoshoula,tacaishibasuinalaizheimedageer?

naodaiwengwengwengde,wenwanenzhunaodai。

“别哭别哭。”

xiaojiahuojimangcongwenwanhuailichulai,calecayanleibiti,naishengnaiqidishuo:“niang,huihuizaiyebutaoqile,huihuibuqutounainaidecaituanzile。”

小灰灰?!

这搞笑的名字!

菜团子又是什么鬼?

“你先等一下啊。”

wenwanrouzhekuaibaozhadenaodai,bishangyan,tadelvyixiayanqiandeqingkuang。

wenwanshibasui,ganggangkaoshangdaxue,jiatingbufuyudetachenzhejiaqigenhaoyouchuqudagong,gongchangfashenghuozai,weijiuhaoyou,taxishengleziji。

queyiwaichuandaolequeyishaoshideqishiniandaimodeniandong,haishiyigesisuiwawadeniang。

yuanzhuwenwanshigechenglilaidezhiqing,duanzhuangxianhui,chaduizaiyueyangcun,kanshangleyueyangcunlidexiaohuozidingzhengkai,bugujialirenfanduiyingyaojiajilezheigenanren。

hunhoubujiu,dingzhengkairuwulikaicun,congciyinxinquanwu。

dingzhengkaizouhou,yuanzhuzaidingjiasihougongpo,renlaorenyuan,yinianhoushengxiaerzi。

liangnianhou,dingjialaoerqulexifu。

ererxifunengshuohuidao,henhuitaolaotaitaihuanxin,zicigongpojiuduiyuanzhumeilehaolianse,jialideleihuozhonghuodourangtazuo,baitianhaiyaoshanggongzhuangongfen,benjiujiaoguideyuanzhuhuaizheduizhangfudesinian,jiashangmeirimeiyedelaozuo,leidaozaitianli,congciluoxiabinggensangshilelaodongli。

weicigongpoyijiarengengshixianqi,jiujiangmuzilianggerenganchujia,wojuzaicunzixibiandeyigepomaocaowuli。

yankanqinghuangbujiedejijie,dahanjianchan,yuanzhuyejiuqushanliwayecaihuilaichongji,keyueyangcunyibaiduohu,yecaiyejingbuqitiantianwa。

edeshizaishoubuledexiaohuihuipaoqunainaijialitougecaituanzi,beidinglaotaitaizhuazhubaoda。

yuanzhuwenxunganlai,huzixinqiedetahelaotaitaidingzui,beilaotaitaiyiganmianzhangqiaozainaomen,hunguixitian。

wenwanjiushizheishihouchuanleguolai。

qingkuangshizheimegeqingkuang,zhuangkuangshizheimegezhuangkuang,wenwanyouzhongxiangzhuangqiangyoubuhaozhuangqiangdecuobaigan。

suanle,jilaizhizeanzhiba!

wenwansaoshiyiyansizhouqiliangdehuanjing,zaikankanyanqiankeliandehaizi。

xinyiheng,yayiyao,tajiubuxinzuoweiershiyishijidemeishaonvzhanshi,hainengzaizheilibeihedao?

“xiaohui,biepa,youmamazai,yihoubuhuirangniaieshoudongde。”

xiaohuiliangjingjingdeyanjingliluchuxiwang,butingdiantou。

“nigegaisibusidetouchizei,haodebuxue,nixuerenjiatoujimogou。”

waimianxiangqiyizhengunzidamupendeshengyin。

xiaohuiliansetubian,hededuozaiwenwanshenhou,sesefadou。

“niang......shi......nainai......”

wenwancumei,zheilaoyaopodaleyuanzhuerzi,haibayuanzhunaodaidagedakulong,haibuxiaoting,juranganshangmenruma!

奶奶的!

laohubufawei,nidangyuanzhushibingmao?!

wenwanfuzheyunhuhudenaodaizhanqilai,xiaohuishenchuxiaoshouchezhutayijiao,huangkongdiyangzhexiaolian。

zheihaiziyinggaihenhaipaneigelaoyaopo。

“biepa,youmamabaohuni!”

neigeniangzi,tashizaijuedebieniu。

xiaohuizheicaihuifupingjing,genzaiwenwanhoumianchulewuzi,yiranduozaiwenwanhoumian。

yigegetoubugao,chuanzhehuisepianjinshangyi,zhazhekutuidelaotaitai,yishounamugun,yishounamupen,zhengduizhemaocaowudama。

“gaisidetouchizei!touwojiadejidan!nigemeiliangxindexiaozaizi,genzhesharenxueshayang。diuzuzongshibadaidelian!”

jiefangsilindewenshengguolaiweiguan,quemeiyourenganshangqianquanshuo。

quancundouzhidaodinglaotaitaishigenanchande,benzheduoyishiburushaoyishideyuanze,dajiahuoyezhinengzaixinlimomoweiwenwanmuzigankaijiju。

sheijiaozheigewenwanshiwailaide,youshigeruanshizi,shuobudingnibangletamen,huitoutayoupaoqudinglaotaitaigenqianketouzuoyide,nongdebierenyishenbushi。

suoyikankanrenaojiuxingle,dingjiadexianshibuhaoguan。

wenwanjuedenaodaimeiyouneimetengle,zhishiyanqianlaotaitaideqiaodashengshizaishoubule。

“别敲了!”

wenwanbagaoyinlianghouleyisangzi。

bujinlaoyaopolengleyixia,kanrenaodeyejingdaile。

pingshizheixiaoxifukemeiyouzheigedanliangganfanggaoqianga!

dinglaotaiyibengsanchigao:“haonigewenwan,nijiaoerzitoudongxi,haiganfapiqi?jiaonierzibatoudejidannachulai!”

wenwanhuitoukanzhexiaohui,xiaohuiyaoyaotou,qingshengshuo:“wozhinalecaituanzi,meiyounajidan。”

wenwanxiangxinerzidehua,youjidanzaojiunachulaijitachile。

“laotaitai,bieshuonisunzimeiyounanidejidan,jiushinalenidejidan,niyebugaizaizheiliyaowuheliu。”

he,xiaotizizhangbenshile,ganzaitamianqianfanbole。

“toudongxizuozei,nizheigedangniangdehaihaoyisishuozheihua!neijidanshijilaoerxifubushentide,nimenyoushazigechi?yitiantiandehuoerbugan,wozaijializhuangbing,haixiangchijidan,zuomeng!”

woqu,zheimebujianglidema?

wenwanzhenshidiyicijianzheiyangmanhengdelaotaitai,ererxifushiren,daerxifujiubushiren?

“laotaitai,xiaohuimeiyoutounijiajidan,womenyebushizei。nishuohuabieneimenantingxingbuxing!nishuosheibuganhuowozaijializhuangbingle?zheihuanijiubupazaotianqian?”wenwanfanji。

laotaitaishangxiadaliangzhewenwan,xiaotiziaileyigunzi,zhangpiqile,jingranganzaitamianqianfanggaosheng?