第二章：心有不甘
anningsuixinyoubugan，danhaishilaolaoshishidijixuqingzhuanlezhang，kanzheshoujishangtishizhangmianhuazouwuqianyuan，anningzheixintongdezhichouchou，kexiangxiangzhiyaotabuquzhaoanran，zheiwuqiankuaiyesuanhuadeqisuole。
“这还差不多。”
xuqingshouleqian，suibiandabandabanbianchumenle，yuanbenhaijifeigoutiaodejiacikeyijinglenglengqingqing。
anningcongbingxianglinaleyiguanpijiu，lakailahuanduizhedianfengshanqianzuolexialai，taheleyikoupijiu，xinzhongchouhuazheyaozenmeduanlexuqingzheiwuxiaxiandetaoqian，zijihaizhizhezheixieqianzaiyuzhoushimaigeyishihuhexuqinghuaqingjiexianni，keyanxiakanlai，maifanghaishizaidengdengba，yaoshijixuqingzhidaozijiyouyibicunkuanzhibudingtazenmenaoni。
“吱吱吱。”
anningzhengxiangzhechushen，zheipangbiandeshoujihuranxiangleqilai，tasuiyipieleyiyanshimoshenghaoma，xiangzhegujishituixiaoguanggaoyejiulandejiele。
kemeiyihuishoujiyouxiangqilaile，haishineigehaoma，anningzheihuirenzhenkanle，zheihaomabushiliujiushijiu，gujiyinggaibushiguanggaotuixiao。
yushitaanxiajietongjian，limaodishuodao：“wei，ninhao。”
“………”
duifangmeiyouyingda，anningyouwenleyici：“wei，ninhao，qingwenninshinawei，zhaoshei？”
“………”
dianhuaneitouyijiumeiyouhuiying，zheihuianningbuguansanqiershiyizhijiebadianhuaguale。
“神经病。”
guanyuzheigexiaochaquanningbingmeiyoudanghuishi，zhishitameiyouxiangdaozheigedianhuahaomadezhurenbujinshenjingerqiebiantai，yebansandian，anningdeshoujizaiyicixiangleqilai。
“nidaodishishei？youwanmeiwan？”anningpokoudahou，zheiraorenqingmengshirengandeshima？
“………”
“dianhuaneitouhaishiyipianjijing，anninggualedianhua，mengtoudashui。
“吱吱吱～”
chuangtoujushangdedianhuayouxiangleqilai，anningkanlekanyoushineigehaoma，zheihuitazaishibudandingfennuqishenjieqidianhua，zhishizheihaimeikaikou，neibianjiuchuanlaileshengyin。
“啊！”
anninghedediudiaoshouzhongdedianhua，zheihuitashichediqingxingle，bingqiequanshenmaokongdoushuqilaile，dianhualimianhaizaifangzheaile，jiushisongbiesirendeneizhong。
anningpingshidanzisuandadele，keraoshidanzizaidadeyedidangbuzhuzheibanyeturantingaileba。
xujiu，dishangdeshoujipingmuximie，anningcaiganjianqi，buyoufenshuozhijiejiangneigehaomalajinheimingdan，tayiweizheijiuanquanle，quemeixiangmeiguoduojiuduanxinyinjiuxiangleqilai。
anningdingzhepingmuneiyixingzibaisibudeqijie，tazheidaodishidezuileshei？haishishuozheidianhuadezhurenrencuoleren？
buranzheiju“youxiganggangkaishi”shishenmeyisi？
houbanyeanningzaimeiyoushuiyi，tadakaibijibenbenxiangkankancaijingxinwen，zheigangdakaibiantiaochulaiyitiaotuisongshiguanyujingshijituande。
xiangdaobaitiancaizhiweidehua，tahaoqididianlejinqu，zhenggexiabanye，anningdouzailejiejingshijituanzhongduguo，yizhidaozaoshangqidian，tadoumeiyoukanwanguanyujingshijituandexinwen，kanlaizheihaizhenbushijiandandejiazuqiyea。
diertian，anningdingzhejuanronglaidaodanwei，suqinyijiantazheiyangbianguanxinwendao：“yo，zanmencaituandediyidameinv，nizheishizenmele？lianggeyanquanbixiongmaohaihei。”
anningyaoyaotou：“bietile，zuowanpengdaogeshenjingbing。”
tabazuotiande“wuyexiongling”yiwuyishidigaosulesuqin，bieshuoqinshenjingli，jiushiting，suqinzheiyeshiyishenjipigeda。
“aiyo，woshuonizheibushipengshangguileba。”
suqinnianjida，tashixinzheiwanyide，bijingningkexinqiyou，bukexinqiwuma。
“nalaidegui，wogujishishenmeezhenggongsigaocuohaomazhengcuoleren。”
anningbingmeiyoudangyihuishi，tadasuandaihuiqinzijineigedianhuadaguoqu，jieshiyixia。
zhongwuanningzhengzhunbeijineigedianhuaqudian，zheilouxiadebaoanjiucongcongpaoshanglai：“xiaoan，yourenzhaoni。”
“找我？”
“对。”
“好，我这就来。”
bashoujifanghuikoudai，anninggenzhebaoanyiqixialelou，zheigangdaolouxiatajiukandatinglizhanzheyigeren，tashengaokanshangquzuzuyouyimibawu，shuaiqidepingtouheirenyizhongkuangyedeganjue，tadelianshangdaizhemojing，anningkanbuqingtadezhangxiang，danwuyongzhiyikendingshigeshuaige，cishitazhengceyanduizheziji，anningshunzhetadeshixianfaxiantazhengduizhegongzuolanshangzijidezhaopiankan。
“请问，您找我？”
“anning，bielaiwuyang！”
zhijianneinanrenzhaixiamojing，shuaiqidelianpangzhanluwuyi，meixinneiyixiaoke“guanyinzhi”tashidaosiyebuhuiwang。
“旌予北！”
anninghedehoutuiliangbu，diezuozaitaijieshang，shita，shijingyubei，tazenmechulaile。
jingyubeixiangqianzouyibu，tajugaolinxiadikanzheanningxixuedao：“bielaiwuyang，anning。”
neixiaorongrangrenzhanli，anningbipozijilengjingxialai，tamanmanqishenkanzhejingyubeishuodao：“nizenmechulai？”
“henshiwang？haishishuonijuedeneixietiaoziyinggaiyiqiangbilewo？”
jingyubeicoujinanninglishengwendao，
“anning，dangchunihejingzhinanlianshouhaiworuyu，wuxianwosharen，zenme？neigeshihoudededeyijingni？nachulaidaoshirangwokankana？”
anningmannaozidouzaixiangjingyubeishizenmechulaide，tagenbengubushangjingyubeishuoleshenme。
“anning，woquannizuihaogaiming，fouzexiaoyeworangniyongshibudeanning。”
huasuiruci，ketazhendehuiyinweianninggaimingerfangguotama？daanshidangranbukeneng。
“jingyubei，nidaodishizenmechulaide？”
“xu，anning，nibuxuyaozhidaotaiduo，nixianzainengzuodejiushihaohaojizijizhunbeihoushi。”
liaoxiazheijuhua，jingyubeijiuxiaoshizaileanningdeshijieli。
anninghaoyihuiercaihuanguojing，taganjinnachushoujibotongleneigehaoma，dianhuajietong，neitouderenbingweishuohua，anningjiqiezhuiwen：“jingyubei，shibushini。”
“嘟嘟嘟～”
dianhuawuqingbeiguaduan，anningzhidaocongciyiwangtayinggaiyouyiduanrizibunenganshengle。
yigexiawuanningdouzaihunhuneezhongduguo，tashenzhihuixiangqilesannianqianzaifangkongdonglideqiangshaan，dangtanazheqiangzhizheneigerennaomenshi，yanlidehenlihejintianshiyimoyiyang。
tayongyuanwangbuleneike“guanyinzhi”。
anningxiawushizaitouteng，tabiansuibianzhaolegejiekouqingjia，huidaojiatazhijiebazijiguanjinlefangjian。
guoleyihui，tayounachushouji，anleyilianchuanhaoma，suirantazaojiuhetafenshou，dantadehaomatayijiudaobeiruliu。
“喂，柠柠。”
dianhuaneitouxiangqishuxideshengyin，anningdingledingxinchenzhepiankehuiyingdao：“zhinan，woyouhuaxiangwenni。”
jingzhinantichujianmian，anningbenlaishibuxiangde，kewunaijingzhinantaidujianjue，tazhihaodaying。
zheigangxialou，jingzhinandechejiutingzaizijimianqian。
“柠柠，上车。”
anningdakaichemen，kanzhejingzhinanneizhanghejingyubeiyiyangdelian，taxianzaihaiyizhenhoupa。
“zhinan，jingyubeizenmechulaile？”
jingzhinanduiyuanningzheiyangwenxianrangandaoyiwai：“taquzhaoguonile？”
“嗯。”
“说了些什么？”
anningkanzhejingzhinan，tazenmekanqilaibizijihaijinzhang？
jingzhinantouguoanningdeyanshenyishidaozijideshitai，taganjinfadongchezi，shituzhuanyianningzhuyili。
“没说什么。”
“ningning，gangcaiwozhisuoyijinzhangshipajingyubeishanghaini，nizhidaotaganguoshenmeshi，suoyiwopa。”
“哦。”
“meishi，ninenggaosuwotazenmechulailema？”
jingzhinanjiandandibalaotaitaituorenlaojingyubeideshishuoleyibian，anningtinghoubujingantan：youqianyouquanzhenhao。
“ningning，wanshangxiangchishenme？”
“bule，nikaobiantingba。”anninghejingzhinanyijingfenshoule，jiuzaineijianshizhihoubujiu，duiwaishixinggebuhe，dangranzhenzhengdeyuanyinzhiyouanningzijizhidao，suoyixianzaiyemeibiyaobuqingbuchu。
jingzhinannanyanshiwangditingleche，anningxialeche，touyebuhuidizoule。
anningyouzhongyugan，jingyubeiyidingbuhuifangguoziji，keshishishitazhendeshaleren，zijiyebuguoshijinyigegongminyingjindeyiwu，ruguotaduizijizuochushenmeguojidexingwei，tadakeyibaojing。
yiluyoudanghuijia，anningxinxubuning，xuqingnazheneiwuqiankuaiqianyijingxiaoshihenjiule。
yewanshierdian，anningzhengshuidemimihuhu，huranbeichuangwaiyizhencierdelabashengchaoxing，tatuikaichuanghu，zhijianxiazhaidexiangzilitingzheyiliangche，neichejiuzaitajiamenkou。
“叭叭叭！”
chemingshengbuduan，jiezhetadeshoujijiuxiangleqilai，youshiyigemoshengdehaoma。
“喂。”
“anxiaojie，womenjinggeqingniguoquyitang，zheicheyijingzainijialouxiale。”
dadianhuadeshifeiji，chelianlabaderenyeshifeiji，dangranshisheishouyitazhendezuode，buyongxiangyezhidaole。
anningkankanshoujixianshideshijian，zheimewanletakendingbunengshangche，louxiademingdishengyuelaiyuepinfan，chaoxinglexuduolinju，mamalieliedeshengyinbuduanchuanlai，ketahaishibunengxialou，buranzheimingjiububaole。
wunaizhixiaanningxuanzebaojing，liyoushi：raomin。
jingchalaidehenkuai，jingcheshangdehonglandengguangtouguochuangzizaianningqiheidewuliyaoye，louxiademingdishengyexiaoshile，tamomingdeanxinlebushao。
“笃，笃，笃。”
huran，menwaixiangqileyoujiezoudeqiaomensheng，anningqishenkaimen，faxianmenwaizhanzheliangmingminjingtongzhi，haiyouyigeshiqibasuidenanhai。
“是你报的警？”
“恩。”
谙柠点点头。
minjingtongzhiyouxiebaoyuandishuo：“xiaoguniang，wokanniyelaodabuxiaole，zenmelangfeijinglizheizhongshiniyequzuo，xiaoqinglvchaojiayongdezhebaojingma？”
“吵架！”
“woburenshita，womenyebushiqinglv。”
anningjilibianjie，kesihumeiyourenxiangxinta，feijishishidijinwu，talazheanningdeshouhongdao：“baobei，laogongcuole，zheibunidianhuabujie，weixinbuhui，wocaishichuzheigebanfa，nikanhairangzanmenminjingtongzhixinkuyitang。”
shuozhezhuanshenjiuduiminjingtongzhidaoqian：“duibuqia，jingchatongzhi，xiacizaiyebuganle。”
“nishenjingbingba，worenshinima？”anningshuaikaifeijideshou，zhunbeizaizuojieshi，keyijingwanle，neilianggeminjingyijingjinlediantile。
“anxiaojie，nihaishihewozouyitangba，jinggedepiqinishidongde，zheiyaoshitabugaoxing，naodaomingtianyeshiyoukenengde。”
bale，qujiuquba，binglaijiangdangshuilaituyan，chenzheigejihui，tadaoyaokankanjingyubeidaodiyaoganshenme。
anninggenzhefeijixialelou，ganglakaihouchemen，feijijiujituilehuiqu，tayilianhuaixiaodikanzheanning：“anxiaojie，jinggefenfule，ninshenjiaorougui，yinggaizhuanrenzhuanzuo，laiba，wozheijiudaizheninqukankan。”
yuanlaifeijishuode“zhuanzuo”jiushihoubeixiang，anninggangxiangkaikou，zheizuijiubeiheisejiaodaifengzhu，shouyebeishoukaosuoleqilai，fanbangzaishenhou，tajiuzheimebeidiujinhoubeixiang。
yuzhoushi，jingshijituansixiadetanyuebinjiangdajiudianzuidingloudeyijianhaohuazongtongtaofangnei，jingyubeizhengxiangshouzherenshengyidalequ，zheizhongkuailedeyuanquanlaiziyunvren。
“xiaogongzi，nihaobang。”
jingyubeixiemeiyixiao，tapaipainvrendelian，tuikaita，jiangyizhangkadiuzaitashenshang，huanhuankaikou：“gouma？”
nvziyikanzheikalikediantou：“xiexiexiaogongzi。”
“en，guai，zouba，yihouzanmenwandian**de。”
“好好。”
nvrenzenmeyemeixiangdaozijijingranzhanshanglegehuocaishen。
menwaifeijiyijingbaanningdaidao，zhenghaohelimianchulaideyaoraonvzidalegezhaomian，nvziyongyuguangzaianningshenshangsaolesao，xiangzhezheijingyubeikouweihaizhenshiduobian。
“啪嗒。”
houzhongdemenbeiguanshang，dianzimimasuozidongluoxia，ruodadezongtongtaofanglizhiyouanninghejingyubeilianggeren。
cishijingyubeizhengbeiduizheta，tazhanzailuodichuangqianfukanzheiyuzhoushidequanjing，haoxiangsihuwangjianningzheigeren。
“旌予北。”
anningzoudaotashenhou，liangrenzhijianyebuguojiushiyimidejuli，zheigejulizaianningkanlaishizuyirangtakeyiyijiaojiangjingyubeichuaidaozaididejuli。
“………”
jiantabuhuiyinganningjixukaikou：“jingyubei，suoyinixianzaishixiangbaofuwo，haishishalewo？”
“杀你？”
jingyubeihuishenniezhuanningdexiaba：“neishibushitaibianyinile？anning！”
“anning”zheilianggejingyubeiyaodejizhong，xiangshiyaojiangtaqiandaowanguayiban。
anningzhengtuoqianzhi，tahoutuiyibukanzhetashuodao：“jingyubei，nisharenshishishi，wobingmeiyouzuocuoshenme，nidajibaofuwonandaobupawozaibanisongniquma？”
anningzheiyangbupasishijingyubeimeiyouxiangdaode，buguotazhendepama？
jingyubeibuzaikananning，tazoudaoqian，naqichajishangdeyaokongqi，dakaidianshiji，liushiliucundepingmushanglikechuxianleyigenvrendeshenying，neizhangliananningzaishuxibuguo，huamianbukanrumu，congpingmulichuanchushengyinxiangyibajiandaoyibianyibiankezaianningxinli。
suirantaxinlibushufu，danmianshangquetairanziruo，zheidianjingyubeidaoshiyoudianyiwai，tayiweitahuibadianshizale。
“jingyubei，ruguonixiangyongtaweixiewo，neimenijiudacuotecuole，tasuiranshiwoma，danyeshishilixiangchulemingdejiaojihua，nijiushifangzaishidaiguangchangbofangtadoubuhuizaiyi，erwojiugengbukenengzaiyile。”
“dangranwoyaotixingni，xunvshiruguozhidaotabeirenpaishipin，shiyidingshizidakaikouwennitaobanquanfeide，daoshihoubieguaiwomeitixingni。”
anningdefanyingtaifantaolule，jingyubeibieyoushenyidikanleyiyananning，zheigenvrenbitaxiangxiangdelengxue。
“行。”
jingyubeidiandiantou，shejiantianletianzijixinggandelengchun，ranhouyoujianghuamianqiedaolingyiduanjiankonghuamian。
anningdingzhejiankongshipinshangderen，tayiyanjiurenchuzheishitajiejieanran，zhijiantaguiguisuisuichuxianzaihuamianli，toutoumomodinazheyigepingzisaijinchuchuang，ranhouyounalelingyigepingzibaozaihuaili，jiezhebianxiaoshizaijiankongli。
anningzheihuihuangle，tabuzijuedizhandouqilai，jingyubeijiantazheiyangzhongyushisaozouleyisiyinmai，henhao，kanlaizheigejushizuoduile。
tazoudaoanningshenbian，dixiashenzicoujintaerbianwendao：“anning，nishuozheiwenwujudezhurenzhifafanfadiaobaowenwushishenmezui？yaopanduoshaonian？buruwozuoyihuihaoren，bazheigedayimieqindejihuirangjini，daoshihouzaijinizhaojigejizhehaohaodikuazankuazanni，ruhe？”
anninggenbentingbujinqujingyubeidehua，tachenjinzaizijideshijieli，mingmingshianfenshoujidejiejiezenmekenenghuiqutoudaowenwu？zheilimianyidingshiyoushenmewuhui。
moran，taxingyanyideng，zhuanguotounuhuozhongshaodikanzhejingyubei，talaguotadeyilingchennuhoudao：“shinizuodeju？shiniduibudui。”
jingyubeiyibajianganningtuidaodishang：“anning，xianzainizhidaozheizhongziweilema？dangchunihejingzhinanzuojuyinworutaowuxianwosharen，zenmebuxiangxianghuiyoujintianzheigehouguo？”
neiduanjingliyidingshijingyubeiguodezuiqurudesuiyue，meiyourenzhidaozheisanniantazaineigebinglengdelaofangshizenmeduguode。
“womeiyou，jingyubei，wozaishuoyicinisharenshishishi！”
“gun**shishi，anningnijizhu，wojingyubeishoudemeiyifenqurudouyaocongnishenshangtaohuilai。”
anningtanzuozaidishang，jingyubeishizhendeezhizhuletadeyaohai，takeyipaoqiquanshijiedanshijueduibunengpaoqianran，neigeyongshengmingaitadenvren。
xujiu，anningdaizheyisishayadeshengyinxiangqi：“nixiangzenyang？”
jingyubeizoudaoanningmianqiantaiqitadexiabayiziyijumanmanshuodao：“anning，guizezhidaotaiduojiubuhaowanle。”
congneitiankaishi，anningjiuduoleyigeemeng，neigeemengdemingzijiaozuo“jingyubei”。
cihoujitianjingyubeidoumeiyouzaizhaoguoanning，dantazhidao，zheibingbushibaofengyuyiguojing，ershigengdadelongjuanfengjijianglaixi。