第1章 废物女婿

霞光县,芙蓉镇。

turuqilaideyichangdayu,dapoleyedeningjing,ganhanlehenjiudetudi,zhongyuyinglailezerunwanwu,tanlanditianshizheneigantiandeyushui。

xiatiandeshancheng,kongqizongshihenzaorede,jiashangshuizhengqibeizhengtengleqilai,suoyiredegensangnayiyang。

jishaolongqizhediandongche,chuansuozaizheipiaopodayuzhong,hunshenyijingshitoule。

moleyibameitoudeyushui,jiangchezitingzailefurongdafandiandemenkou,ganggangzhunbeilikai,yigebaoanmoyangderenzouleguolai,shuodao:“zheilibuzhuntingche!”

jishaolonglengleyixia,wendao:“weishenme,zheilibushitingchededifangma?”

baoanyouxiexianqidikanzheyanqianlangbeidejishaolongshuodao:“jintianbuxing,jintianshilinzhenzhangdeshengri,fandianbeibaochangle,wuguanderen,bunengzaizheilitingche!”

“keshi,wojiushilaicanjialinzhenzhangshengriyandea……”

jishaolongyouxiewunai,zaishenshangmosuoleyibian,zheicaixiangqilai,congyiyuanjicongcongchulai,bayaoqinghanluozaineilile。

kandaojishaolongnabuchuyaoqinghanlai,baoanbiyidibaibaishou,shuodao:“nizheizhongrenwojiandeduole,ganshashabuxing,hunchihunhediyiming,ganjinbachejiwonuozou,yaoburandehua,wojinizale……”

shuowan,yihuishou,menkoudeqitalianggebaoanyecouleguolai。

jishaolongdelianzhangdetonghong,yixiazibuzhidaozenmebancaihaole。

jiuzaizheigeshihou,yiliangsangtanatingzailemenkou,conglimianxialaileyigefengdupianpian,xizhuanggelvdenianqingnanren,yiyanjiukandaoletaijiexiamiandejishaolong,yanshendongledong,handao:“yo,zheibushilinzhenzhangjiadeneigefeiwunvxuma,zenmele?jinbuqule?”

gangganghechijishaolongdeneigebaoanyikandaoyanqiandezheigenanren,mashangdiantouhayaoqilai,gonggongjingjingdihandao:“zhuanggongzi,ninlaile,nishuoshenme,zheigelanzishilinzhenzhangjiadenvxu?”

yanqiandezheigezhuanggongzi,jiaozhuangyan,fuzhenzhangzhuangtiannanjiadegongzi,yeshifurongzhenzuidadeqiyelonghuzaozhichangdechangzhang,huanjuhuashuo,shifurongzhendeshoufu。

zhuangyanxixuedixiaolexiao,shuodao:“kebushima,nimenzheibangbaoan,gujishiyouyanbushitaishanle,zheirenjiaojishaolong,linzhenzhangjiadenvxu,buguoma,shishangmennvxu,chiruanfandejiahuoeryi……”

toufashangdeyushuidiluoxialai,jishaolongmoleyiba,buhangsheng,jintianshilaozhangrenlinyuanfengdewushidashou,tabuxiangjitaremafan。

“nizheigefeiwu,shangxuedeshihouyangyangbiwoyouxiu,youshenmeyong,xianzaibuhaishifeiwuyige,lai,nikankanzheishishei?”

shouyizhao,cheshangxialaileyigetingtingyulidenvren,niuzhe**,zoudaolezhuangyandeshenbian,yifuniunieyaomeidemoyang。

zhuangyandeshou,zaineigenvrendeshenshangcenglaicengqu,haoxiangguyishijijishaolongkande。

“jishaolong,haijidezheigenvrenma,tingshuoshinidechuliana,xianzaidaowoshoulile,nishibushishengqia?”

yanqiandezheigenvren,jiaowujie,jishaolongganghuilaineiyinian,jiuchuanchulaitayouyigechuliannvyoujiaowujiele,shishishang,doushizheigewujiejizijitiejinde,neishihoudejishaolong,diyimingxiaobiye,fenghuazhengmao,sheidoushuotahuiyouyigehenhaodeqiantu,wujiezhudongzhaoguojishaolonghaojici,doubeijishaolongtangsaikaile,ranhouyejiuyoulehoumiandechuanwen。

“chuliannvyou?wozenmeburenshi?”

jishaolongdelianshang,doushijingya,huanlehuan,shuodao:“woxiang,niyinggaihaohaowenxianidexiaonvpengyoule,shibushirenshibiedetongmingtongxingderen,lingwai,woyaogaosuni,zheiweimeinv,haoxiangzhiqianzaijinlongxiyuchenggongzuoa,gaobuhao,nidelianjinhenduoe……”

“你……”

zhuangyanhaoxiangyixiazibeiyezhuleyiyang,yijuhuadoushuobuchulaile,benlaishixiangxiluoyixiajishaolongde,zheixiazijidaoyouxiediurenle。

“zhuanggongzi,nibietingtahushuo,womeiyou……womeiyou……”

wujiexiangyaojieshi,zhuangyandiulemianzi,nalihaitingtadejieshi,yonglizaiwujiedeyaobuwolewo,nongdewujieshengteng,keshiyoubuganjiaochulai,kanlai,zhuangyanshibaxinlidenuqi,dousazailetadeshenshang。

cuileyikou,niutoubianzoulejinqu。

jiranshilinzhenzhangdenvxu,jigebaoanyeshizhiqu,buzaiweinantale,taganggangzoujindamen,jiutingdaobeihoudebaoanyilundao:“linzhenzhangdenverlinzhiqing,keshizanzhenzishangshuyishuerdedameinva,zenmehuijiajizheimeyigefeiwua?”

lingyigebaoanshenshenmimidishuodao:“nimeitingshuoa,linzhiqingdenainaibingzhong,suanmingdeshuoyaoyongjiehunlaichongxi,haiyaoyigebazitebiehederen,yushihualeshiwuwan,zhaolezheimeyigeshangmennvxu,kexia,jiehunhoudedisantian,linjialaotaitaijiuguoshile,zheihunyina,mingcunshiwangde,shuoshinvxu,qishizailinjialiantiaogoudouburu。”

zheiyangdehua,jishaolongziranbushidiyicitingdaole,jiehunliangnian,hunyindequeshimingcunshiwang,ruobushiweilejiejiedebing,jintianzheiyangdeyanxi,tagenbenmeiyouxinsihuilai。

jishaolongganggangjinqu,yigeshenying,yecongcheshangzoulexialai,ganggangjiudianmenkoudeneiyimu,taquanbukanzaileyanli,cirenyishendetidexikuchenshan,cadehenliangdepixie,daizheyifujinsiyanjing,kanzhejishaolongdebeiying,yanshenlimianhenfuza。

“houfushuji,ninlaile!”

kandaozheigenianqingren,jigebaoandoudiantouhayaoleqilai。

tazhishiweiweihanshou,qiaowushengxidizoulejinqu。

houqingshan,furongzhendangweifushuji,nianlinggenjishaolongyibanda,quezaizheigeweizhishang,yijingganleliangnian,yourenshuo,tashizhendangweishujidejiebanren,yeyourenshuo,tayihouhuidiaorendaoxianliqu,zhongshuofenyun,zhiyouyijuhua,neijiushitaqiantuwuliang。

buguangqiantukeguan,weirenyeshididiaoyinren,zaifurongzhen,yesuanshilihaijiaose,nianqingdelihaijiaose。

jishaolongtuikaileneishanfulitanghuangdedamen,benlaiyouxiechaodeyanhuitingli,shijizhuoren,suoyourendemuguang,douluozailetadeshenshang,shunjianjiuanjinglexialai。

zuizhongjiandeweizhi,zhanzheyigenvren,zhayankanqu,wojianyoulian,wulunshizhangxiang,qizhi,shencai,doushuyuyiliu,furongzhenshigepianyuanxiangzhen,renshuoqiongshaneshuichudiaomin,pianpianqueyunyuchulelinzhiqingzheimeyigedameiren。

benlailinzhiqingshizaigenzhuangyanshuohuade,yikandaojishaolongtuimenjinlai,zhoulezhoumeitou,tazhekuankuandeshenzi,zhudongzouleguolai,biyidishuodao:“wotiqianbantianjinidaledianhua,gennishuole,xinshangrendexianweidingshujiyaoguolai,nihaigenwochuanchengzheiyang,nihaixianjiwodiurenbugouma?”

“lin……zhiqing,wo……wojiejiedebingqingyouyanzhongle,wo……”

dangchu,ruobushiweileneishiwuwanjiumingqian,jishaolongshuoshenmeyebukenengzuozheigenvrendeshangmennvxu,keshi,zheishiwuwan,yuanyuantianbushangjiejiebaixuebingdezheigewudidong,yiyuanzuotiankaishijiucuizhejiaokuanle,jishaolongnengyongdeqiandouyijingyongwanle,xianzaikoudaili,lianshikuaiqiandoutaobuchulai,tazheicizhisuoyilaicanjiazheigeyanhui,qishijiushixianggenlinzhiqingjieqiande。

huahaimeichukou,jiubeilinzhiqingdaduanle:“wobuguannishenmeliyou,jiuzheimeyijianxiaoxiaodeshiqingdouzuobuhao,nanguaitamendoushuonifeiwu,zaiwokanlai,nihaizhenshigefeiwu!”

shuowan,congjishaolongdeshenbiancajianerguo,yigebeiyingdoumeiyouliuxia,qumenkouyingjiekerenqule。

linzhiqingyizou,zhuangyandepixieshengyijingdaoleerbian,weisuodixiuleyixiabizi,duizhejishaolongshuodao:“tingshuoliangnianle,nihaimeigenlinzhiqingtongfangguoni?zheiyangdejipinnvren,gujiyezhiyouwozhuangyannengjiayudelele。”

xiangdangnian,zhuangyanyeshilinzhiqingdequnxiazhichen,benlaiyiweizhizaibide,sheinengxiangdao,linzhiqinggenjishaolongjiehundexiaoxi,yixiazibatajidamengbile,jiajisheibuxing,juranjiajiletazuitaoyandejishaolong,zheijiuzhendeshirenbuzhule。

jingguohouqingshanshenbiandeshihou,houqingshanhenlimaodigenlinzhiqingdianlediantou,linzhiqingyeshiduizhetaweiweiyixiao,liangrenbufayiyan,quehaosishuolehenduo。