（sanjinnaohuazancunyuci，manqiangrexuebanjunyiyou！）
（dashibuxu，xiaoshibuju，shishujianlve，nanmianzhuguan，qingwujieyi！）
历朝历代。
“轰隆隆！”
yizhenjingtiandongdideleiming，xiangchelewushugepingxingshikong。
yimianshanzhejinguangdejudayubi，turanchuxianzaigaokongzhishang！
chengqianshangwandegurenjiandaozheizhongyizhuang，fenfenbentaokuhao，bizhibuji。
raner，wulunheshihedi，zheimianyubishizhonggaoxuankongzhong，bupianbuyi！
wulunduoruwushe，shenzangdixia，biwanghuangmo，yuanshezhongyang，zheimianyubirengranqingxikejian。
zheishihou，yubizhishangturanchuxianyixingwenzi。
yidaohunhoudenansheng，dourancongyubizhizhongchuanchu。
“天降神鉴！
pingshuohuaxiaguowang，shuxieqianqiugongzui！
wanghoujiangxiang，mingliuwenshi！
houshijinimengaiguandinglun，nimenkeganyiguan？”
……
川蜀某大学宿舍中。
tanzuozaiyizishangdeqingshounanzi，turanjingzuoerqi。
baiposihuibandeyanshenzhong，ranqilechongtiande***！
chenmiwangluoxiaoshuoliangnianban，tajingranjuexinglexitong！
绑定系统！
bushitianxuanzhizi，zenmehuiyouruciqiyu？
ding！duanshipinpandianlishixitongyijihuo，suzhubaiposhifoubangding？
baipopailepaizijidelian，zheizhanglianshangjihushipibaogutou，tayibajiupaizailequanguzhishang。
yibazhangxiaqu，lianluotengleshou，shoudatenglelian。
疼！
这说明不是在做梦！
baipotianshengneixiang，pingshengzhiaikanshu。
xiangbudaokanshuyeshangshen，caiershiersuijiujiaobuxufu，tixuqiruo。
xianzaimashangguonianle，baipodexinzhongyoukaishidagu。
meicihuilaojia，sixiaofeixiaodelaoba，yidinghuifachulinghunkaowen。
nixiaozidaodikandeshenmeshu？
kanshuyenengbarenkanchengzheiyangzi！
ziguyilai，xitongdoushinitiangaimingdehaodongxi。
baipomeiyourenheyouyu，bangding！
ding！suzhubaipotongyi，xitongkaishibangding……
叮！宿主你好！
duanshipinpandianlishixitong（betabanben）weininfuwu！
“等等！
gangcaibangdingdeshihou，kemeishuoshiceshibanbena！
suzhudouxuanzebangdingle，caishuomingshiceshiban。
zheiguiniantou，lianxitongbangdingdouyaogaoxujiaxuanchuan！”
baiposhunjianxiangdaolehuobuduibande**jiezhaopian，xinzhongyizhentucao。
ding！bencibetabanbenxitong，yijingjubeixitongdequanbugongneng。
shipincaiji、bofang、pingjiagongnengyijingqibei，baozhenghezhengshixitongmeiyouqubie。
qingsuzhufangxinshiyongni，qin！
亲个锤子啊！
weishenmelianxitongtishi，douyiguzitaobaoweier。
zheihaizenmerangrenfangxinshiyong！
zheizhongqingkuangxia，shuoshiceshibanhezhengshibanmeiyouqubie，shijishangyidinghuiyoubuxiaodewenti。
“xitong，nidezhuyaonenglishishenme？”
ding！duanshipinpandianlishixitongdezhuyaozuoyong，shijilichaolidaiderenwugaiguandinglun。
wanghoujiangxiang、wenrenmingshi，shenzhishiwumingxiaozu，doukeyipingjiaqishengping！
“wokanguobushaolishishuji，yeyanjiuguobushaolishirenwu。
rangwojilishirenwugaiguandinglun，zhipabugouquanweia！”
ding！suzhuqingzhuyi，nizhinengcaijishipin，ranhoujiangshipintoufangdaolichaolidai。
erqie，caijishipindemude，shiweilejimouweirenwugaiguandinglun。
shipindejieshaoci、yinle、pangbai，xuyaosuzhuzijiniding。
tongshi，nideshipinkeyitongguoyigezhanghaojinxingzhibo。
zhibojiandeguanzhong，keyixuanzexuanzexinshangheyanezheiweirenwu（dianzanhuozhelacai）。
liangzhongqingxudouhuijilei，ranhouxitonghuijucijiyuzheiweirenwujianglihuozhechengfa。
xinshang、zunjing、chongbai、jingyang！
yane、bishi、tuoqi、zuiren！
zuizhong，youzhibojiandeguanzhong，weizheiweirenwugaiguandinglun！
tingxitongshuowan，baiposhunjianjiuyouxiebudandingle。
“nizheixitongbuxinga，xiangdangyujinrenpingpanguren。
那还要我做什么？
wojiushifuzecaijihebofangshipindegongjurena！”
ding！suzhukeyitongguopandianlishihuodeshouyi！
meipandianyigerenwu，huodejichugongzi10wanyuan！
pandianwanzhihou，genjuguanzhongdeqingxuzhi，jichugongzihuiyouzengyi！
birumouweilishirenwubeihouren“zunjing”huo“bishi”，gaishipinhuodeshouyi40wanyuan！
ruguobeihouren“jingyang”huodingwei“zuiren”，gaishipinhuodeshouyi80wanyuan！
pandiandeyueduo，shouruyueduo！
guanxijinmizhiren，hainenglianhepandian，xitonghuizhuoqingtigaoshouyi！
一个短视频10万！
xiaoguohaodehua，yigeshipinkeyizhuan80wan！
ruguolianhepandian，hainengtupo80wanshangxian！
zheiyangdeshouru，jihumeiyourenhechengben！
zhengzaibeidasishangdebaipo，juedegongzuodedoubuyongzhaole。
shenmenianrubaiwandejinrongjingying，nianruqianwandewangwendashen，doujiyepaxia！
xiangdaozheili，baipoturanyouxiangdaoleyijianshi。
“ranghoushiwangminpingpanlishirenwu，huibuhuibukeguan？”
叮！
放肆！
胡说八道！
zhibojianli、shoujipingmuqiandeguanzhongdalaomen！
wulunshikanshipinde，haishikanxiaoshuode！
tamen，jiushizheigeshidaizuikeguande！
yinweitamendaibiaode，shizuiguangdadeputongren！
lishi，doushiyourenminchuangzaode！
weibaozhangsuzhurichangshenghuo，xianyuzhishicipandianchoulao。
xitonghuayingangluo，baipodeshoujijiuzhongzhongdezhendongleyixia！
“nindejiejikazhanghu3568，yu1yue26riwangshangzhifushoururenminbi1000000.00yuan，jiaoyihouyue1000250.00yuanzhonghuayinxing”
haolihaidexitong，jingranbuyongshangshui！
jiandaozhenjinbaiyin，baipoyifenzhongyebuganlangfeile。
talikekaishichangshixitonggongneng，chuanglizhibozhanghao。
“duzhedalaomenyidingyaojimianzia！
点赞、拉踩都可以！
zhiyaorangwozhuangoule，nvzhuangdoumedewentiyo！”