第1章 赌一个活下去的希望

一刀穷,一刀富。

一刀穿麻布。

zheishiruilideyijulaohua,shuodeshifeicuidushi。

dangrenheshiwugenduzhanshangbiandeshihou,tadouhuichengweiyigebeiju。

quanguogedi,youwushurenyinweizheigeduzi,ershudeqingjiadangchan,jiaporenwang。

wobajiushigedutu,wodajishiqi,jiuzhidaotazaidushi。

wojiyili,taconglaimeiyingguo,xianshishudiaolequanbujixu,houlaishudiaolefangzi,zaihoulai,lianlaopodoushudiaole。

womazaiwoshisuideshihou,shengxialaiwomeimei,yinweishizaishishoubulewobazheigeduguidezhemo,tatoutoudediuxiawogenwomeimei,yigetaozoule。

wohenlijiewoma,woyemeiyouhenguota,meiyourenheyigenvrenyuanyigenwobazheizhongduguiguoyibeizi。

ruguowonengpao,woyeyidinghuipaode。

womazoulezhihou,wobajiuxiangshifengleyiyang,basuoyoudeyuannian,fennu,doufaxiedaowoshenshang。

meici,tashuqianhuilaizhihou,jiuhuidudawoyidun,zaiheiandetongnianyinyingxia,woconglaidoumeiyouxiangguoyaotaopao。

yinweiwopaole,womeimei,jiuchengledaitiwodegaoyang。

wogenwomeimeixiangyiweiming,wojuede,dengwochengnianle,youlegongzuo,youlejingjishouruzhihou,wojiukeyidaizhewomeimeilikaiwobale。

suoyiwojiupinmingdexuexi,wanmingdefendou,zhongyuwokaoshangleyikedaxue,weilejinkuaidehuodegongzuodejihui,wofangqikaoyan,zhijiequyiyuanshixi。

weilenengjinkuaizhuanzhengnadaogongzi,womeirimeiyedejiaban,xiangshiyitiaogouyiyanggenzhegedakeshidezhurenhoumianmailideganhuo,taohaotamen。

zhongyu,shixiyinianzhihou,wozhuanzhengle,zheiyiweizhe,wozhongyukeyizhuanqianle,zhongyukeyidaizhewomeimeiguoshangzhengchangrendeshenghuole。

woyiwei,neitianshiworenshenglizuikuailedeyitian,danshimingyunquegenwokailegewanxiao。

neiyitian,chengweileworenshenglizuiheiandeyitian。

dangwonadaozhuanzhengtongzhideshihou,yiyuanjiulailejizhen,shuoshiyoulianggerentiaoloule,shiyigeduguiyinweishuhongyanle,huobuxiaqule,jiudaizhetanvertiaoloule,nandedangchangsiwang,neigenvhaiyinweibijiaoxingyun,jiaoxinghuoxialaile。

dangwotingdaozheijuhuadeshihou,wozhenggerenyouruleipi。

wozhijiechongrushoushushi,dangwokandaotangzaibingchuangdeneigenvhaijiushiwomeimeideshihou,wozhenggerenshengdoujuedebenkuile。

woconglaimeihenwoguofuqin,tadu,shirenxing,meiyourennengrenshoudeleyidaobaofudeyouhuo。

danshi,dangwokandaowomeimeitangzaishoushushiliyanyanyixideshihou,wozhendebawoneigegaisidefuqinhendetiwuwanfu。

woxiwangtaxiadiyu,yongyongshengyongshilaichanghaitadezuie。

wodangshijiuguizaiyishengmianqian,qiutamenqiangjiuwodemeimei。

xingyundeshi,womeimeiqiangjiuhuilaile,danshi,chenglezhiwuren,tazheibeizi,douyoukenengtangzaibingchuangshang,xuyaozhuanmenderenlaihuli。

houqidezhiliaofeiyongshiyigetianwenshuzi,qiangjiudefeiyongdourangwofudanbuqi,jinguanwoshiyiyuandezhigong,danshiyiyuandelingdaohaishiwuqingdegaosuwo,ruguonabuchulaizhiliaodefeiyong,tamenjiuhuitingzhizhiliao,wobixuyaobawomeimeijiehuiqu,jinxingzizhujiuzhi。

womeibanfa,woshiyisheng,wozhidaoyiyuandenanchu,yiyuanbushishantang,yiyuanxuyaoyingli,danshiwozhendemeiqian。

wobanengjiedequanbudoujiele,jiuchagaolidaile,danshi,haichashiwankuaiqian。

woshizaizoutouwulule,zhendenabuchulaiyifenqianle,bidaozuihouwoxiangdaolezuihouyigeren。

我的妈妈……

wozhanzaihuayangyaoqidedamenkou,butingdezhangwangzhecaolimiankan,wozaiyiyuanshixideshihou,kandaoguoyiyaoleidebaozhixinwen,zaixinwenli,wojiandaolewodemama,tagenhuayangyaoqidelaobanjiehunle,zuolegongsidegaoguan。

woyizhimeiganquzhaotagentaxiangren,wohaipawobazhidaozhihouzailaihuohaiwomama。

danshixianzaiwobasile,wojiumeiyouzheifangmiandegulvle。

“woqiuqiunile,rangwojinquba,woqiuqiunile,womajiaozhangmeiru,wozhaotajiumingde,woqiuqiunile。”

wobutingdeaiqiuzhebaoan,xiwangtarangwojinqu。

danshibaoanxiangshiyidubukeyuyuedegaoqiangyiyang,jiangwozulanzaimenkou。

“nimashizhangmeiru?bietamafangpile,zhangmeirushiwomenfuzong,xiangnizheiyangdewojianduole,meitianbuzhidaoyouduoshaomaochongwomenzhangzongsishengziderenlairenqin,ganjingun……”

baoanwuqingdehua,xiangshiyibaliciyiyang,henhendichuowodexinwozi。

turan,wokandaowomacongdatinglichulai,tayizheguangxianliangli,dabandenianqingshimao,chuandaizhemingguidezhubaogenshoushi,suiranhenduonianmeijian,tadebianhuayeshifenjuda,danshiwokeyiqueding,tajiushiwomama。

meiyourenhuirencuozijidemuqinde。

“ma……ma,woshiwufeia,woshixiaofeia,mama……”

wobutingdehoujiaozhe,xiwangnengyinqiwomamadezhuyi。

wobenyiweiwomakandaowozhihou,huilimachaozhewobenpaoguolai,womenmuziyoushijinianmeijianle,woduitadesinianyourujiangshuiyiyang,zheigeshihouhenbudechongguoquyongbaota。

woxinlixiangzheta,yeyinggairuci。

wojidongdiyanjingdouhongle,henbudeleiruyuxia。

danshi,jieguorangwowubideshiwang。

tazhishilengzheliankanlewoyiyan,yanshenlibinglengdexiangshiburenshiwoyiyang,shenzhihaiyouyixienuqi。

tasuishoudaishangyanjing,lengmodizoudaocheziqian,zhijiezuojinchezili。

zheiyixiliedejudong,rangwozhenggerenyourujiaoleyipenlengshuiyiyang,woneikechongmanxiwangdexin,yeyixiazidiedaolegudi。

baoandakaimen,wokanzhewomakaizhebenchijiaochechulai,zoudaobaoanshiqian,tadakaichechuang,wolimapaoguoqu,wojidongdishuo:“ma,woshixiaofeia,wufeia,meimeichushile,xuyaoqianzhibing,nijiwodianqianba……”

woyiweiwomatingdaomeimeichushile,huihenshangxin,hendanxin,danshitazhishilengmodedakaipibao,conglimiannachulaiyiqiankuaiqiandiuzaidishang。

talengmodishuo:“nianjiqingqingde,buxuedianhao,chulaizhapian,nazijideqinrenzuojiekou,wokanbuqini,zheidianqianjiudangwoshangnile,baoan,yihoubierangzheizhongrenlaile,yingxianggongsixingxiang。”

womadehua,rangwozhenggerendouzhenjingle,tashuowanyangzhangerqu,wokanzhetalengmodebeiying,wowanquanwufajieshouwomadelengku。

neizhongshiluo,jiuxiangshiwofeijinyiqiepadaolewoyiweidetiantang,wobenyiweitiantanglishimeihaoyuxingfu,danshidakaimenquefaxian……

limianjuranshilingyigediyu。

baoanbaqianjianqilaishuaidaowodelianshang,henhendibawotuizou,woshuaidaozaidishang,baoanehenhendimadao:“yejiushiwomenzhangzongxinhao,nazheshangqianganjingunba,xiacizairangwokandaoni,wodaduannidetui。”

wokanzhedishangdeqian,wozhendexiangbutong,wanquanxiangbutong。

woshitaqinshengerzia,meimeishitadeqinshengnvera,taweishenmejiuzheimelengkuni?

wobaqianjianqilai,zheiyiqiankuaixiangshiduyaoyiyang,zaidushazhewoduimuqinzheilianggezidemeihao。

bu,tayijingbawodushale。

wokaishihen,henwoma,neizhonghen,wufayongyuyanlaibiaoda。

tabiwobahairangwojuewang。

keshiwomeimeidezhiliaoa。

juewangzhixia,wojinjindiwozhezheichirudeyiqiankuaiqian。

woxinlidehenyituizhewoquzoujuelu。

woxianzaizhinengbizhewoqudushi。

jiwomeimei,duyigehuoxiaqudexiwang