第3章 金龟婿

qinshanhezheibianhuagangluoxia,zhangmuniangzhouyumeijiuyilianjifengdekanzheqinshanhelengxiaodao:“shini?shinigepia!nigefeiwuyebusaopaoniaozhaozhaojingzikankannineifeiwudeyang,haigandayanbucandechengrena,nigaoxiaobugaoxiao?nishuozheizhongdahuajiubupashandaonideshetouma?”

“benlaijiushiwo,bushiwo,neinishuoshishei?”qinshanhekanzhezhouyumei,zhoumeishuodao。

“shishei?dangranshiwochengqianchengdashaole!”

zhouyumeichaozheqinshanhefanlegebaiyan,ranhouganjinkanzhelinyouxinshuodao:“nvera,ganjinde,xianzaimashanglikequjiqinshanheneifeiwulihunqu,jiajichengdashao,tianni,yuanbenwoyiweiwoneiguimijiwojieshaodegenvxubukaopuni,meixiangdaojingranzhenshigedalaozhongdedalaoa,jingranrangtangjiazhudoulaiwomenjiaxiaguizhandoule!”

“ma,nihushuoshenme?shenmechengdashao?”linyouxinzhoumeikanzhezhouyumei。

“woyigehenduonianmeilianxideguimi,qianjitianturanlianxiwo,shuotarenshiyigewaishengdedajiazudeshaoye,neishaoyetebiexihuanni,womeidanghuishi,bijingwoneiguimihenbukaopu。”

zhouyumeimeikaiyanxiaodekanzhelinyouxinshuodao:“neibushitangjiazhuweixierangnipeiyigeyuema?wojiulianxilewoguimijieshaodechengdashao,wobashiqingjichengdashaoyijiang,dangchangchengdashaojiujiwoshuohenjiandan,jiaojitale,tahuirangtangjiazhulaidaoqiande,womeixina,bijingtangjiazaiwomenqingzhouneikeshiyizuowurennengkuayuededashan,meixiangdaozheiwanshangjiulaidaoqianle,zhenshirangwojingxia,womenjiazheibazhenshibaoshangdatuile,jinguixuzhongdejinguixua!”

“zheidoushinidecaixiangeryi,nixianzaijitalianxi,wenwenta,daodishibushitabangdemang!”

qinshanhexiaole,zheizhangmuniangzhenshigejipina,taihuiziwolianxiangleba!

“nigefeiwuzhenshibujianguancaibudiaoleia,xing,woda,woxianzaijiuda!”

zhouyumeijifengdekanleqinshanheyiyan,nachushoujilikejiujichengqiandaleguoqu。

henkuai,dianhuajiujietongle。

gangjietong,zhouyumeijiuduizheshoujishuodao:“chengdashaoa,shinibangdemangma?ganggangtangjiazhuqinzilaishangmendaoqianle,haishiguixiaqiuwomenyuanliangni!”

“e,shenme,qudaoqianle?haiguixiale?”

shoujilichuanlaiyidaojingyadeshengyin。

“shia,chengdashaonandaobushinibangdemangma?”zhouyumeitingdaoshoujilichuanlaidekouqi,zhoumeiwendao。

“shiwoa,wozhiqianjiwoyeyeshuoleyixia,woyeyeshuotangmingzheixiaoziqianshoushile,yaoqiaodatangming,meixiangdaozheimekuaitangmingjiuqudaoqianle。”

“hahaha,wojiuzhidaoshichengdashaonibangdemang,chengdashaonifangxin,youxinsuiranheqinshanheneifeiwujiehunle,buguotamenyizhidoushiqingbaide,qinshanheneifeiwudoushishuichuangxiamiandadipude,wozheijiurangtamenlihun,youxinfeinibujia!”

zhouyumeimanlianxianmeideduizheshoujishuodao:“chengdashao,nizaiqingzhouma?womenquanjiaqingnichidunfana?bijingnibanglezheimedademang,erqienihainengheyouxinlianluolianluoganqingni!”

“womeizaiqingzhou,zheiyang,mingtianba,xingbuxing?”

“hao,chengdashao,mingtian,woanpai,dingwomenqingzhouzuihaodekaisadajiudian!”zhouyumeiheiheixiaodao。

“xing,neimingtianzailianxi。”

“haode,neijiubudaraochengdashaole。”

zhouyumeiguaduandianhua,jingxidezhijiedoutiaoleqilai。

“tianni,laotianyezhenshijuanguwomenjiaa,jiwomenjiasonglaizheimeyigechaojijinguixua!”linyouxinyilianyansudekanzhezhouyumei,shuodao:“ma,nibiehushuobadaole,wobuhuiheshanhelihunde,gengbuhuijiajishenmechengdashao!”

“sha?nishibushifengle?taqinshanhepeibushangle,lajifeiwujiusuanle,xianzaijuranhaixuehuilesahuang,nigaosunikanshangtanalile?”

zhouyumeikanzhelinyouxin,shengqideshuodao:“chengdashaokeshinidejiumingenrena,bujiajitanihuihouhuide,zheishilaotianyecijinidebukeduodedejihui!”

“我不离婚!”

linyouxinyaozhezuichun,yilianguzhideshuodao。

“xingxingxing,woyelandejinifeihuale,mingtianqingchengdashaochifan,nikankanrenjiachengdashaoneifengduneiqiyunnijiuzhidao,qinshanhezheifeiwushiyouduolajile!”

zhouyumeiqidenaoqiaodouyunle。

“qingkewobuqu,nizijiqujiuxingle。”linyouxinyaoleyaotou,shuodao。

zhouyumeiqihuhudehoudao:“nibixuqu,renjiachengdashaobanglenizheimedademang,nibuqudangmianganxieyixiachenghetitong?”

“youxin,quba,woyeyiqiqu,wodaoshihenxiangjianjianneichengdashaoyouduodadefengduheqiyun!”

qinshanhedandanyixiao,kanzhelinyouxinxiaodao。

“dui,niyedequ,heng,meiyouduibijiumeiyoushanghai,nidaoshihaohaokankan,tongyishinanren,weishenmenijiushigefeiwua!”

tingdaoqinshanheyaoqu,zhouyumeidunshijiuqixiaole。

linyouxinkanleqinshanheyiyan,meiyouduoshuoshenmele,zheishizaibazijiwangwaimiantuima?zijiweiletadingzhuzheimedadeyali,jieguotalaiyijuquba?

“yumeia,nikankan,nimenjiarenshizheimedaderenwu,zenmeyebujijialirenshuoyixiaa,haiwomendajiadoutiyouxindanxinni!”

zhanglanmanlianduixiaodekanzhezhouyumei,bajiedeshuodao:“yumei,zhenxianmunia,juranyougezheimehaodejinguixu,yihoufadalekedetixietixiewomenjiaa!”

“gun,tixiegepi,heng,zhiqiannibuhaixiaozhangdeyaobawomenjiadefangzichezicunkuandoujishouzouma?”

zhouyumeilenghengyisheng,yilianaorandekanzhezhanglan,shuodao:“congxianzaikaishi,womenjiahelinjiameiyourenheguanxile,zanmenyidaoliangduan!”

“shenzia,womenlaijinimenjiakaiwanxiaode,nikebiedangzhena,zanmendoushiyijiaren,nalinengshuoliangjiahuaa!”

linyankanzhezhouyumei,manlianxianmeidexiaodao:“fangxinba,shenzi,nainaiyaoshizhidaonimenjiayougezheimelihaidenvxu,kendinghuibalinjiasuoyoudegongsidoujiaojiyouxinguanlide!”

“qie,xianzaixiangqilaishiyijiarenle?”

zhouyumeifanlegebaiyan,manlianaorandeshuodao:“zhiyunishuodelinjiadeneixiegongsi,buhaoyisi,womenjiaxianzaikanbushangle,wojinguixucongshouzhifenglilouchulaiyidianyemiaoshazhenggelinjiale,yaozhidao,wonvxujiayijuhua,jiushitangjiajiazhudoudelaixiaguidaoqian!”