第1章 吃垃圾都不配

夕阳残照,墓园内。

kanzhemubeishangdezhaopian,tangchaopingjingdeninan:“xiaoxizhunquema?”

“sangxinbingkuang!fuqinbingshi,erzijingzaiguancaiqianyuxiangqinnv**……”

sinianqiandezheitiaoxinwen,yizhidouchanraozaitangchaodexinzhong,zaoyichengletadexinjie。

shijishang,bingbushizaiguancaiqian,ershizaijichang!

dangshifuqinchehuotangzaiyiyuan,jiushengxiazuihouyikouqi,tacongbuduihuilaitanwang。meixiangdao,gangxiafeijigenfuqinhaoyoudenverhuihe,liangrenquetongshibeirenxialeyao。

suiranzuizhongduoguolejizhezhibo,ketamenquequeshishifashengleguanxi。xinglaihouquejiedaorenwu,tangchaoliankanfuqinzuihouyiyandejihuidoumeiyou,zhinengxuanzezhixingrenwu。

meixiangdao,xinwenquebianchengletazaiguancaiqianbanshi,erqiehaidasichuanbo。neixiemoxuyoudezhaopian,rangtangjiachengweiquanguodexiaobing。fuqinsihoudesantian,tangjiachanyebeixunsuguafendaijin……

“zhunque,songjiajiushimuhouzhumou,tamentunletangjiadedabufenchanye。”shenhoudetianshuduandingdiantou,“jintian,songjiazaijiazhongdabaijiayan,mudeshiweileqingzhutamensongjiashizhichaoguowubaiyi,tongshiyexiangjiecijihuixiyinhenduohehuoren。”

tangchaohaowubolan,yijiupingjingdeningwangzhemubei:“tamenqianxiadezhai,gaihaile。”

tianshuchiyileyixia,dishengdao:“xingzhu,tamenbuguoshiyiqunlouluo,hexuninqinzichushou……”

budengshuowan,tangchaopingdandedaduan:“nisuiwoduonian,gaizhidaowodexingzi。”

tianshuxintouyizhan,etoubuzizhushentoulelenghan。xingzhudexingzi,sheibuzhidao?

kansipinghe,keruoganweiniyuta,weiyousiluyitiao!

jingnanwuwang,jingbeifengjiang,qixingyaoyue!

zheiyigeyuelai,huaguoneidouzaishengchuanzheisanjuhua。suoyourendouzhidao,yigeyueqianhuaguoganggangjikuishiwandijun,jingbeifengbaijiang。tiansuo,qixingzhishou,baijiangzhiguan。

keshimeirenzhidao,qishihoubianhaiyouyiju,zhanshentianjiang!

zhengshizhanshentianjiangyigeyueqianyiyijizhilizhanshasidawuwang,shiwandijuncaihuiluohuangertao。yezhengshizheiweizhanshen,zhuchilejingbeifengjiangdianli……

lidaizuiqiangxingzhu,huaguodiyigerongdengdianfengdezhanshen,dangjintianxiayizhidezuiqianggaoshoumeiyouzhiyi……

nanguailaoxingzhucengshuoguo,tashitianzhongqicai,zhudingyaozhanzaiyundianmiaoshizhongsheng……

tangchaotaiqishou,qingqingfumozhebinglengdemubei:“ba,gaitaohuigongdaole。”

yemujianglin,songjiabieshu。

yuanzilirerenaonao,yongrenhebaoanmangdebukejiaojia。pangbiandetingchechangshangyipaidelaosilaisihelanbojini,zhongjiandeyanhuichangyijinghenrenao,gejiemingyuanzaidengguangxiaxiandeyouweidongren,bushihaiyousheyingjideshanguangdengzaishanshuo。

chezitinghao,tangchaoyutianshuchaozheyanhuichangzouqu。

kanzhedengguangxiarenaodechangjing,tangchaozuijiaogouqileyidaohuxian:“songjia,qipai。”

shenhoudetianshudishengdao:“songjiarujinyijingchengweilanchengqianwudejiazu,ziranshiyaodazhangqigudexuanyao。tingshuo,jinwanlanchengsuoyouyoutouyoulianderendoulaile,haiyoubushaomingxingcongwaidilaizhuzhen。”

“wojiuxihuanzheiyangderenao。”tangchaodeshuangmoushanshuozhehanguang……

gangtabujinruyanhuichang,qianmianyinglaiyigefensexizhuangqingnian,banxinbanyidewaizhetoudaliangzhetangchao,dunshiyangqimeitou:“zeze,haizhenshinizheigefeiwu!”

shuohuajian,fenseqingniankuabudangzaiqianbian,manshixingfendeshangxiashenshizhe。

tangchaotingxiajiaobu,shensedanrandekanzheduifang。meixiangdao,gangjinmenjiupengdaolaoshuren。

zhaoyunguang,zhaojiadagongzi。tangchaogentakeshigaozhongsanniandetongbantongxue,zhishiguanxiyizhidoubuhao,bijingtangchaodechengjiyizhibitahao,zaijiashangtangjiagenzhaojiaxianglaibuhe,zhaoyunguangmeishaojieciqifutangchao……

“aiyawocao!”zhaoyunguangyifujiandaobaobeideyangzi,liangyanmaozhexingguang,“wanwanmeixiangdao,nizheifeiwujingranhaihuozhe,haha!”

tianshutongkongyisuo,gangyaofahui,tangchaoqueweiweitaiqishoushiyi。zhengchouzhezenmekaichangheshi,zheibujiuyourensongsileme?

sihaobugutangchaoliangrendelianse,zhaoyunguangchongmanxingfendemoshoucazhang:“meixiangdaoameixiangdao,nizheigefeiwujuranyouhuilaile。haha,youdianyisi。heizenmezhe,burenshiwola?”

tangchaoweimizheyan:“zennengburenshi?”

huameishuowan,zhaoyunguangtiaozhehuaixiaodemeitou:“woshuofeiwu,meixiangdaonijingranyouneizhongteshupihao,juranzaiguancaishang……zeze,biaoyanjinibakan?haha,nitemehaodaiyeshidangguobing,jingranbeijizhezhuadao,zhentemefeiwu,haha……”

siwujidandechaoxiao,tangchaoquebuweisuodong,shensedanrandekanzheduifang。tianshuweiweizhoumei。

yanjiantangchaojuranmeishuohua,zhaoyunguangmanshibiyidetigaoshengyin:“feiwu,nimentangjiazaodoumeile,hailaizheizuoshenme?pianchipianhe?zeze,haiyishenlilingzhongshanzhuang,renmogouyang。yo,buhuinixianzaishibaoanba?haha……”

xiaodexiangdangkaixin,xiyinlezhouzaobushaorendemuguang。

tangchaoyijiuwudongyuzhong,lianshangshizhongkanbudaorenhebolan。zheigelaotongxuehaishiyidiandoumeibian,jiushizheimejian。

zhaoyunguangyibalouzhutangchaodegebo,angshoutingxiongdedashenghanzhe:“gewei,longzhongjieshaoyixiaa。zheiweishiwodelaotongxue,tangjiadefeiwutangchao。jiushi,sinianqianneigezaitabaguancaimianqianbandashibeizhuadeneigefeiwu!”

shengyinfeichangda,haoduorendoufenfenzhuanguotoulaiweiguan,changmianpoweiganga。

tianshushensejinbeng,kexingzhubufahua,tayebuhaodongnu,zhinengbiezhe。

zhaoyunguangpoweideyi,jixudao:“wozheiweilaotongxuedangniankeshibanshangdejianzisheng,quefangqigaokaoqucanjun。hunlesinianhuilai,laobasile,haiqinshoubatangjiajihuile,lihaidehen。taxianzaihundebuhao,meidifangchifan,jintianguolaipianchipianhe。dajiajiwogemianzi,chishengdelaji,douliujita,tajiushihechilaji,haha……”

xiaodexiangdangkaixin,yerangzhouweihaoduorendouluchubiyi。sinianqiantangjiadexinwen,haoduorenyinxiangshenke,dangniankeshiyilunleyizhengnian。

tangchaojiushimeiyoushengqi,danrandesichuzhangwang,kanqilaishenzhiyoudianjiaoao。

zheirangzhaoyunguangdunshiyouxiebushuangle,zheiyajuranbushengqi?

songkaitangchaodejianbang,zhaoyunguangpiezuidao:“woshuolaji……ebu,shifeiwu,niyouqingjianma,zhijiejiujinlaile?”

tangchaowenhedehuida:“meiyou。”

zhaoyunguanglijibumandezhoumei,dahezhe:“meiqingjian?meiqingjiannihaixiangchisongjiadelaji?nibupei!”

zheihuakezhenshicier,rangzhouzaokongqidunshininggujifen。taishangzizunle,meiqingjian,chilajidoubupei!