第一章姐姐回家
jiejiejiehunhou，diyicidaizhejiefuhuilaiguonian，
kaikoudiyijuhuajiushirangwoxiuxueyinian，
weitahejiefuhuaiyigehaizi，
bushi，wangshangchonglangchongjiule，haizhenyiweidaxueshengqingcheyuchunhaonaniele？
wofanshoujiutamendousongjinlejingju。
1
jiejiejiachuqusinian，diyiciyaodaizhejiefuhuijiaguonian。
爸爸嘴上说着：
“zheimeduonianzhongyushedehuilaiyicile，pingshiyebuzhidaohejialilianxi！”
lianshangdaoshizhenchengdeluchuleyidianxiao。
mamagengshijiaobuzhandidebuzhizhe，mailehenduojiejiexihuanchidecai。
danianyejiejiezhongyudaizhejiefuhuilaile，tingdaoqiaomensheng，woqukaimen。
shuoshihuawohaishidiyicijiandaojiefuzhenren，zhangdehaisuanhanhoulaoshi。
dangchujiejierenshijiefumeiduojiujiunaozhejiehun，woyouzaiwaidishangdaxue，zhidaoxiaoxideshihouhailaibujiqingjiahuiqu，tajiucongcongbanlehunli，jiehunhougengshiyiciyemeihuilaiguo。
wodakaimen，jiefujiumizheyancongtoudaoweibawokanleyibian，neiyanshenxiangshidaliangshenmewujian，piantouhejiejieshuo：
“还行。”
姐姐松了口气：
“nifangxin，wozheimeimeishigedaxuesheng，shengxialaidehaizikendingshigehaode。”
jianwoyilianmeng，jiejiezheicaiyouxiebuqingbuyuandeduiwozhijiedao：
“nixiugeyinianzuoyoudexue，jiwohenijiefushenggehaizi。”
“你疯了吧？！”
“hushuobadaoxieshenme！”
wodezhenjingdeshengyinhebadeyitongxiangqi。
zheishijiefujinmenle，shoulishenmeyemeidai，hanleshengba，zhijingzuozaileshafazhengzhongjiandeweizhi。
bakanzhetazheifumoyanggengshiqidezhikesou。
jiejiejinlailazhulaobadeshou：
“ba！wohedaanrenzhende，womenjiehunzheimeduonianmeihaizi，yishengshuoshiwodewenti，nimenyebuxiangduibuqidaanba？“
“genghekuang，zheijianshiyeshimeimeizhanlebianyi，daanzheimeduonianlaiduiwohenhao，tayouhenxihuanhaizi，jiurangmeimeibangmangshengyigeba。“
“dengtabahaizishengxialai，tahaiyijiushigedaxuesheng，youmeishenmeyingxiang，yesuanshizuolejianhaoshia。”
jiejiezheiduanhuashushishizhenjingdaowole。
姐夫也道：
“wokanmeimeishenduanchaledian，lianyemeiqianqianhaokan，danshigedaxueshengyemianmianqiangqiangba，niyezhidaoxianzaidedaxueshengduodehen。”
jiefumizheyan，xiangshizaishuoguolezheicunjiumeizheidianle。
woqidezhifanbaiyan，laoziyeshibeipingxuanguoxiaohuaderen，shenmejiao“mianmianqiangqiang”？
genghekuanglianggegaozhongshuipingderenyelundedaoduizhewozhizhidiandian？！
“nimenliangshimenkoudongshalema？shuochuzheimehuangtangdehua！woyemeitongyi！”
我忍不住开口道。
jiefuxianqidepielepiezui：
“piqizhenbaozao，yihouyebupajiabuchuqu，denghaizishengxialaile，qianqiannikeyaohaohaoguanguan，bierangtayichuandaozheizhongliezhijiyin。”
姐姐忙说好：
“nifangxin，yihouhaiziyounidejiyinkendingshihaode！”
我气得直哆嗦。
wokaolegehaodaxue，shigedaxueshengyizhishiwobayinyiweiaode，beijiefudangzhemianzheimeshuo，yixiajiudonglehuoqi。
我爸忍不住骂道：
“daguonianshuoshenmehunzhanghua！”
甚至想起身赶人。
姐夫不满的嘟囔：
“shuoliangjushihuadoubuxing，haizhenyiweiwoxianglaia，yaobushizheimeduonianmeihaizi，daguoniandewocaibuxianglaizhaoqishou！”
womaganghaocongchufanglichulaile，kenengganggangchaocai，meitingdaowomenzaishuoshenme。
“zheishizenmele？gangdaojiajiuyaozou？”
jiejietingdaojiefudehualianselimajiubianle，yishoulazhuta，yibianduiwomadao：
“ganggangwohedaangenmeimeikaiwanxiaoni，meimeidangzhenle。”
你管这叫玩笑话？
我忍不了。
wogangxiangfanbo，wobalianmanglazhuwo，qingshengdao：
“suanlesuanle，daguoniande。”
wozhidao，zheigejializuiqidaichituanyuanfandejiushiwoma，tapanlezheimeduonian，yebuxiangrangtashiwang，zhihaoyanxialefanbodehua，zhidao：
“shuohuazhuyidian，buranyihoubiehuilaile！”
wohewojieyiqianjiubuduifu，womameifangzaixinshang。
“niliangdoubushixiaohaile，bieyijianmianjiuqia！”
老妈道。
“duilefancaihaole，zaozaolaiduancai。”
erjiejiezheibian，buzhidaotashuoleshenme，zuiqimajiefukanshangqukeqilexuduo。
zhishichifandeshihou，jiefuyingshiyaozuozaiwopangbian。