第一章入狱
“xiangxiang——xiangxiang——”
nanrenyibianyouyibiandezainvhaideerbianjiaozhetademingzi，qiangyoulidebeibanggudenvhaishengteng，lidaodadaojihuxiangyaojiangtaroujinshentiliguxueli。
nvhaipinmingdexiangkanqingchunanrendelian，keshiquezenmeyekanbuqing——
“啊！”
chengxiangadeyishengcongmengyanzhongjingxing，dakoudakoudechuanzhecuqi，lianshangyipiansaore。
她又做这个梦了。
buzhiweihe，zuijinzheiduanshijiantazuozheigemengdepinlvyuelaiyueqinle，meicitadouzaimenglinulidexiangyaokanqingduifangdelian，kerenpingtazenmenuli，quezongyekanbuqing。
那个男人——
到底是谁——
pailepailianjia，chengxiangyoudiankouke，suoxingqishenqulouxiaheshui。
huilaishijingguofuqindefangjian，limianchuanchulaideduihuashengrangtatingxialejiaobu。
“neige**dousileshinianle，nihaibukenjiwoyigetangtangzhengzhengdemingfen！”
傅姨？
“jishenme？xianzaizhenggechengjiashangxiasheiburenni？mingfenbuguojiushiyizhangzhieryi。wozheibushixiangbaxiannadaotashoulidegufenzaiyingnijinmenma。”
“wobuguan！erqiexianzaiyedengbulele，dangniannengchudiaotamaxianzaiyenengbatajizuole！woyaomingzhengyanshundedangchengtaitai，nandaonibuxiangrangerzirenzuguizong？”
chengxiangjingkongdedengdaleyanjing。
这说的是她和妈妈？
妈妈是被害死的？
yiwaifaxiandexinxiliangtaidale，rangchengxiangjinghedemaogusongran。
tabuganduodouliu，ganjinduohuifangjianqu。
caigangjinmenjiaoxiabuzhidaobandaoleshenme，chengxiangzhenggerenshuaileyijiao。
tazaiheianzhongmosuozheyaoqilai，yiwaidemodaobandaotadewuti。
haoxiangshigeren，moqilaihaoxiangzhanhuhude，zenmehaoxianghaiyouyibadao——
fanyingguolaihouchengxiangshunjianbeihouhanmaoshuqi。
jiuzaizheishi，payisheng，yourendakailedeng。
dengguangbafangjianzhaoliangderutongbaizhou，yerangfangjianlideyiqiezuiewuchuyanzang。
“啊！”
kanqingleyanqiandejingxiang，chengxiangqilidejingjiaoshengxiangchezhengchuangfangzi。
“tiana！sharenla！daxiaojiesharenla！sharenla——”
jinghushengzhongchengjiashangxiaquandoufengyongerlai，fanglixuexingkepadehuamianrangsuoyourendouhedeliansefabai。
chengxiangjingkongdekanzheyanqianneijumianrongniuqushuangyanyuandengsibumingmudeshaonvyiti，shensehuangluandeyaotou，yanleizhibuzhudewangxiadiao。
“meiyou——meiyou！bushiwoshade，womeiyoushata！wozhendemeiyoushata！”
keshitazhanmanxuejideshuangshouyijichazaishaonvxiongkoushangneibadaixuedebishoushizairangrenwufaxiangxin，tazhendegenzheizhuangminganwuguan——
——
半年后，监狱。
“jiwoda！dasita！”
yigeshenxingshouruodenvfanbeiwugetongshinvfantuantuanweizhuquandajiaotideouda。
youjiuchezhetoufade，youyongjiaotide，haiyourenyindudezhuanmenqiatashenshangyinmidebuweiyouningyouqia，tadeyifushenzhibeineixierenbale，luchukepadeqingziyuhenlai。
chengxiangbuzhidaozijidaodiaileduoshaoquanjiao，zhijuedeshentihaotonghaotong，yishiyekaishiyuelaiyuemohu。
taxiangkuaituobusidebeirenzhuazhushuangjiaoshuaiguolaishuaiguoqu，baotoudeshuangshouhenhenzazaitiechuangzhushangyesihaoganjuebudaotongteng——
xujiuhououdazhongyutingzhi，chengxiangquansuozaidishang，yanyanyixidekuaiyaosidiao。
yourenzaitadebiziqianshileshi。
“tahaoxiangyaosilezenmeban？”
“pashenme？zheishichushaozhuanmenzhaohuguode，zheigexiaodufuyaoshizhendesiletayidinghuibaipingzheigeshide！”
erbianxiangqidehuayurangchengxiangpiaoyuandeyishizhongyuyoumanmanjulong。
tabunengsi，tahaiyaochuqu，tayaofuchou——
meidengtayouzugoudeliqipaqilai，jianjinshidetiemenkuangdangdebeidakaile。
“19号，出来！”
“——”
chengxiangrutongsigouyibanlangbeidebeiliangmingyujingyachujianjinshi。
taxianggeposuibuwawayiyangdebeirengchujianyu，suizheshenhouneishanhouhoudetiemenguanshang，wulizhichengdeshentitanruandedaolexiaqu。
tatangzaidishang，wendaolexiexuziyoudeqixi，touguoyaoyandeyangguangfangfokanjianlezaitianshangdemama。
“妈妈——”
ganhedehoulonglituchudeshengyinshayanantingdexiangchuisizhirensuofachudebeiming，guntangdereleicongyanjiaoyichu。
cierdechacheshengxiangqi，yiliangheisemaibahetingzaitadeshenbian。
suizhechemendedakai，liangtiaobeiheisexikubaoguozhededazhangtuicongchelimaichulai，jinjiezheyishuangzengliangdeheipixieherancaizaichengxiangdelianpang，kankandemeiyoucaishangqu。
chengxiangkunnandexiangrangmuguangjujiaozaiduifangdelianshang，danmeidengtakanqingchuduifangjiujiangtacongdishangtuoqilai，xiangsaihuowuyibandejiangtasaijinlechehouzuo。
tazaihouzuojiandaolezheiliangchedezhenzhengzhuren。
jiangchengdamingdingdingdechushijituanzhixingzongcai，cengjingshitamingyishangdeweihunfu，zhetingchen。
yeshineigebeita“shasi”deshouhaizhegege。
nanrenzhangderenshengongfen，xingmujianmei，gaobiliang，xiahexiantiaoyouyueliuchang，jinmindezuijiaoyijitashenshangneigushengrenwujindelenglieqixirangtajirenganjuezhikeyuanguanbukechupeng。
ercishi，nanrendemuguanghaobuyanshideliuluchuduitaxianeyijichouhen。
cheziyilubenchi，suduhenkuai。
chengxiangbudebuxuruodekaikou，“niyaodaiwoquna？”
zheishijieshangzuixiangyaotamingderen，zhetingchenshiqizhongzhiyi，chengxiangmeiyoutianzhendaorenweitahuihaoxindelaijiuta。
zhetingchenlinliexilidemuguangkanguolai。
“rhyinxingaxingxue，quanjiangchengzhiyoushigerenshizheigexuexing，nidegusuipeixinggenwoxuyaodewanquanpipei，woyaoniqujiuyigeren。”
anzhaoyiwang，yanqiandezheigenvrenjiusuanshisizaizhetingchenmianqiantayebuhuiduokanyiyande。
danzheici，tabudebubachengxiangcongjianyulilaochulai。
yinweitayaojiuneigetangzaiyiyuanlimingbujiuyiderener。
程湘眸色微动。
tabaozhezijisesededuodaochemenbian，xiangzhishoujingdetuzi。
“ruguowoshuowobuyuanyini？”
“niyiweiniyoushuobudequanli？”
chengxiangdejujuerangzhetingchenborandanu。
“ruguobushikanzainihaiyoukeliyongdefenshang，nipingshenmeyiweizainishaleyueyuezhihouhainenghuozhezouchujianyu？”
chengjiahaisuanshixiang，qinzijiangzheigesharenxiongshousongjinlejianyu。
weileburangchengxiangsidetaitongkuai，zhetingchenhanjiandemeiyouzhuiqiutadesixing，ershixuanzemanmandezhemota，rangtameitiandouhuodeyaoshengbunengyaosibude。
huixiangqineigekongbudeyewan，chengxiangqirankuxiao。
“ruguowoshuowomeishanghainimeimei，nixinbuxin？”