第一章我愿意替你去死

平行时空。

1983nian,neigejiuyuaneryoumoshengdeniandai。

7yue10ri,dechengchunfengxiang。

“爸!”

“爸!”

linyouchengnaodaihaiyouxieyun,mimihuhude,naodaiyehenteng,bijinghuanleshei,shuiyijuezhengkaiyan,jiukanjianyanqianzhanleyige,budui,haojigeluobutouhanzijibabahuibutouteng。

talinyouchengyigecaiershisansuidexiaobianju,zenmedaotoushuileyijue,bujindaolenianling,haidaolerensheng。

zenmeyanjingyibi,yizheng,tajiusanshiersuile。

关键还有了五个娃?

不对,是六个。

youyigehaizaihaizitamadeduzili,tingshuohaizitamazijiyigerenquyiyuanshengwaqule。

jiusuantashiyigebianju,danyemeinengzheimebiangushiqingjiedea?

这不合理啊!

guangdiandoujinchuanyuejushangxinglea!

yaobushitaxianzainaoziliyoulingwaiyigesanshiersuidezhananjiyi,tazhipazhendehuirenweizijiguishangshenle。

haoba,xianzaizheiqingkuangbiguishangshenyeqiangbuleduoshao。

“ba!maquyiyuan,nibuqujieta?”

shuozheihuadezuigaoluobutoushuzheyigenmahuabian,shenxingshouruo,youxieshengqididingzheziji。

linyouchengkanleyiyanshuozheihuadenvhai,zheijiushitadedanverlinzhaoxi,jinnianshisui。

tahenxiangshuoyiju,haizibiehantaba,tahainianqing,youxiechengshoubule,keshikanzhelinzhaoxishengqideyanshen,linyouchengmeihangsheng。

“ba?nibuhuijintianhaiyaoqudapaiba?”

shuozheihuadeshidiergaodeluobutou,chuanzheyijiandaihuabandebaisekuzi,buxiangshinanhaideyifu,daoxiangshinvhaidekuzigaiguode,shenxingshouruo,gannubuganyandixiaoshengwenleyiju。

haoba,wenzheihuadeshitadeererzilinzhaoqing,jinnianbasui,shenshangchuandekuziyeshijiejiechuanshengxialaigaide,shangyixiukouchuhaiyouyigebudingbeixiuchenglehuaduo。

linyouchengdemuguangconglinzhaoqingzhinendexiaolianyidaopangbiandisangaodexiaoluobutou,zheishitadesannverlinzhaomei,jinnianliusui。

linzhaomeishoushouxiaoxiaodeshenti,danquedunzaidishangfuzhelingwaiyigegengxiaodexiaoluobutou。

neishitadesierzilinzhaoman,jinniancaisisui。

zhiyulingwaiyibiandechuangshanghaishuizheyigeliangsuidewawa,neishitadexiaonverlinzhaohuanjinniancailiangsui。

zaiyisuanquyiyuanshengwadehaizitamaduzilineiyigehaibuzhidaoshengxialaimeiyoudewawa,yinggaisuanlingsui?

neigeduzilidewawa,mingziyijingqihao,linzhaole。

xiqing,meiman,huanle,yijiaren!

duici,linyouchengqueshiyukuwulei,toutengwubi。

zheilingsui、liangsui、sisui、liusui、basui、shisui……

还是一个等差数列?

yuanliangershisansuidelinyouchengnaodaitong,bijingzheiyangdeqingkuanggeshei,sheinaodaibutonga!

xiangtayiwei21shijidedahaodanshenqingnian,zoushangwenxuechuangzuodedaolu,haoburongyichengweiyimingxiaobianju,zenmejiuturanchuanyuedaoyigesishierfeidemoshengniandai,guanjianyichaohuidaojiefangqian,jiatusibi……

renshijianzuitongkudeshimoguoyuciba!

zai1983nianzheigemoshengdeshidai,zheijibianshijiacaiwanguan,haoba,tadaoyebushibunengshizhejieshou……

xianzaijiacaimeiyou,youdezhishifafuyefaxudezhongnianshenti,yijiyanqianzheijigeluobutou。

youdiannanshou,nanyijieshouzenmeban?

zheiyuanshenbenlaikaijuyebucha,benlaiyesuanshishangguogaozhongdezhishiqingnian,houmianshangshanxiaxiangjinxinglaodong,keshidiyinianjiumeibawozhuziji,hecunlideguniangzaiyiqile,ranhoujiujiehunchengjia,anzhaoliangnianshengyiwadepinlvchechedidizhagennongcun,meibanfa,sheirangzainongcunchengjiayijingwufaxiejiadaikoufancheng,zaizeyuanshenyoubushidushengzinv。

yuanshenjialitongyangshiyidajiazi,xiongdijiemeisange,tapailaosan,shangmianhaiyoudagelinyoucai,erjielinyoufeng。

yuanbenyuanshenfumushibuxiwanglinyouchengzainongcunjiehunde,jiushidanxinhoumianhuibuhaohuilai,keshilinyouchengmeikongzhizhu,laodalinyoucaishizhunbeijiebanfuqingangtiechangdegangwei,erjielinyoufengtebielihai,jibianjiehunshengzi,qianjinianhaishicanjiagaokaoshangledaxue,xianzaizaiwaishengdebaoshegongzuo。

zhiyulinyouchenghoumianhaishizaichenglidefuqinzaigongchangyinweiyiciyiwaishiguyingonglishi,gongchangneibianzheicaiweilemibulinjiacaiduoanpaileyigeminge。

yuanshenzheicaiyoujihuidaizhezijideyiqundeluobutoulikainongcun,huidaochenglibushangleyigebijiaoqingxiandebaoanduigangwei。

keshidaizhezheiyidajiaziriziziranyebuhuihaodaonaliqu,zaijiashanghoumianyuanshenyinweishanziligang,wanhuzhishou,gongchangnongdiulecaiwu,zheijiudiuletiefanwan。

zheijiudaozhiyuanshenhoumiangongzuoyebuhaozhao,sheijiaoyuanshenjibuyuanchiku,yebuyuanshoulei,yuanshendedagelinyoucaihaoburongyiqiurenjiyuanshenzhaolegesaojiedaodechashi。

keshiyuanshenyoulabuxialiansaodajie,sihuobuqu,yaocidiao,haishihaizitamalanlexialai,yidazaobangzhequsaojie,zheicaisuanshiwenzhuleyigefanwan。

yiqianhaiyoulinyouchengdemuqinshichangtiebuyier,danshiqianjinianmuqinbingshi,zheifenjiazhihou,linyouchengyijiashenghuoshizhuojinjianzhou,pingchangjiushikaoshijikuaidegongziguohuo,danshilinyouchenghundecha,xingziyejianjianchale,yidajiaziquanshuaijihaizitamafuze,tazeshibushijiuheyixierendapai。

yaobushipingchanghaiyouyigedageshaoweibangchenzhe,zhiparizizhendejiuhuiguobuxiaqu。

zailinyouchengkanlai,yuanshenzhendejiushiyigezhanan。

yaobushizhanan,zenmehuiduizijihaizitamaduziyigerenquyiyuanshengwahaobuzhiqing,zaiwaimianherendapaidadetianhundian。

jiuzailinyouchenghaizaishizhejieshouzijiyoujigehaizideshihou,gebilinjuzhangweiminjimangmangdipaojinmen,choujianzuozaitangwulidelinyoucai,chuanzheqi,kanleyiyanwuzilimiandehaizi,yegubudeneimeduo,zhijieshuodao:“youcheng,haibuganjinquyiyuan!”

“nilaopozaiyiyuannanchansile。”

yishunjian,linyouchengnaoziyouxieyunhuhude,talaopozaiyiyuannanchansile?

zheijuhuaranglinyouchengmengle,luobutoumenyemengle。

xiaoyidiandeluobutoumenhaibuzhidaozheihuashishenmeyisi,danshilinzhaoxishouxiaodeshenzidalegehanzhan,liansecanbai。

他老婆死了?

孩子他妈难产死了?

haizitamajiaoshenmelaizhe,linyouchengnaoziyishijianyouyixiehuanghu,yanqiansihufuxianchuleyigemianrongyouxiefuzhongdenvren,toufakuhuangmaozao,tingzhedaduzi,zaixiaxiaodejialilailaiququ,mangqianmanghou……

哭声响了起来。

linyouchenghuiguoshenlai,kanjianlinzhaoxiyijinghongzheyanjing,kuleqilai。

xiaoyixiedeluobutoulinzhaoqingdaidaide,haimeifanyingguolaizheihuashenmeyisi,erlinzhaomeihelinzhaomanmeiyouku,danshiyeminruidiganshoudaoleweixianhebuxingsihulailin,jinjinbaochengyituan。

wuzilimiandechuangshangtangzheneigeliangsuidewawasihuyeganyingdaoleshenme,kaishiwawadakuqilai。

tingzhezheiyiwuzikusheng,linyouchengxinzhongyipianmangran,weiyouyigeniantoushanguo。

孩子他妈——

ruguokeyi,woyuanyitiniqusi。

真心的。