第一章

wangyoudiaokantashizhengerbajingdenvernu。

zhidaoneitianwoquxianchang,batamenjiaoxunleyidun。

弹幕炸了:

【bushi,talaijiemuzenmehaiguanbierenni?renjiadexiaohaiguantashenmeshia?】

yulundadaodingfengdeshihou——

lianggexiaohaishangqianbaozhuwo,duiwosajiao:

「mami,womenzuiaideyongyuanshimamie。」

zheichangjing,baquanwangjiganchenmole。

songpeifengdaizhelianggewashangqinzizongyideshihou,meixiangdaowohuitoutoudiqudangguanchayuan。

taqianjinianyizhishigaolengrenshe,shanglezheigezongyihou,renshehaoxiangzhujiandiwangkongzhibuzhudefangxiangqule。

chuchangdeshihou,tazuoshoubaozhenveranan,youshouqianzheerzizhouzhou。

满脸的慈父笑容。

弹幕里全都在夸:

【zheishilongfengtaima?zhangdehaoxiang,haokeaia,gengejianzhishiyigemozikechulaide。】

【xiaodehaochong,guorandangbabalejiushibuyiyang,fenggemianxiangdoubianle。】

【haokeaidexiaohai,lianyuandudude,rangyiyiqinyikou!wohenzijidezuibashenbujinpingmuli!】

【tamendemamadeduomeia,tingshuoshigesuren,zheijinianyizhidoubaohudehenhao。】

zaidatingli,ananbaozhesongpeifengdebozi,zhengkaozaitashenshangshuijue。

taqingqingdiyongshoupaibeihongzhe,shenziqingqingdidoudongzhe,kanshangquhenyoudaiwajingyandeyangzi。

zhouzhoucongpangbianzouguolai,handao:「baba!」

songpeifengyongyanshenjinggaota:「xiaoshengdian,jiejiegangshuizheni,jiejietaileile。」

zhouzhoupazaishafashang,weiqudao:「baba,nidenghuieryekeyihongwoshuijuema?woyehenlei。」

songpeifengtuokouerchu:「nisisuile,buhuizijishuijuema?」

danmumanpingde「hahahahahaha」。

yucitongshilingyibian,guanchashilideguanchayuanmenkanjianzheiduanyerenbuzhuxiaochusheng。

kaibodiyitian,suoyourendouzaikuatamenlianggekeai,resoudengshangquhaojici,zheijiushiqizhongyigemingchangmian。

wobiaomiankanzhefengpinglangjing,shizeneixinanxi。

dangrankeaile,yebukankansheishengde。

anxiguohou,woxiangdaoleshenmezhongyaodeshiqing。

wokaikoushuo:「fumuduihaiziyinggaiyishitongren。」

danmudewangyoukaishiheirenwenhao:

【zenmehuishia?wojiukangezongyifangsongyixia,jiangjiuzenmehaishuojiaoshangleni?】

【zheikanbuchulaishenmeba,youdianxiaotidazuole,kenengfenggejiushibijiaochongnvera。】

【shuobudingrenjiadexiangchumoshijiuneiyangni,weizhiquanmaonengbunengbuyaopinglun。】

【xianzaixiadinglunhaitaizaole,womenzaijiezhewangxiakankanbijiaohao。】