第5章 世纪笑话

yanmoyazheduichiyiandetongqing,wangzhechijianan,yilianweiqu,jixuduizhehuatongkaikou:“ba,woshizongliangnian,ninmeizhaoguowoyejiusuanle,woxianzaihaoburongyihuilaile,ninnandaodoubugaoxingma?”

shuowan,yanmodongqingdidiaoxialiangdiyanlei。

zhanzaibinkexizuihoumiandefuhuaichenjingjingdikanzhenvhai。

她哪是伤心落泪?

fenmingshijianchijiananbeihedaohou,gaoxingdekude。

jiutazheiyanji,buqudangyanyuankexile。

“wo……wo……”chijiananbantianshuobuchuyijuhualai。

chiyuweidemuqinliyaojimangzoushangyilianguanqiedikaikou:“anan,nihuilaijiuhao,nikuaiguolai,rangmakankanni,nibuzaizheiliangnian,mameiyitianbuxiangnia……”

yanmolianseyibian,zhuantoulenglengkanxiangliyao。

dangnianjiushizheinvrengouyinchijianan,qisichiyiandemuqinyueminde,tadenverchiyuweigentayiyanghuose,weileqian,weilenanren,yiyangdebuzheshouduan!

qiangyazhemanqiangdefennu,yanmoduizhehuatongkaikou:“ayi,womazaosile,niwanglema,beiniqisideya!haiyou,wokannishixiangwosiba,wosile,nihewobajiukeyinazhewomaliujiwodenei20yijichiyuweidangpeijia,haorangtajiaruhaomenduiba?”

zaichangdebinkemenyigegemianlujingya:

“guaibudechijianeimedafang,ganqingnei20yishiqianqiliuxialaide!”

“hehe,gaobuhao,chijiadaxiaojieshizongliangnian,jiushiliyaozheigehoumagaodegui。”

“zeze,zuidufurenxina!”

liyaohendeyayangyang,kemianshangyijiuhenchendezhu,“anan,niduimamashibushiyoushenmewuhuia?babamamayizhishihenainide。”

yanmolengxiao:“aiwo?neizheiliangniannimenweishenmebuzhaowo,haiduiwaixuanchengwosile,nanbucheng,nimenzhidaochiyuweihefuchengkailiangnianqianguyikaichexiangzhuangsiwodeshi?”

“guyizhuangni?”fuchengkaidemuqinshenrudangjifouren,“chiyian,nishaohushuobadaole,aiqingjiangjiuniqingwoyuan,nibunengyinweichengkaibuaini,jiuzheimedihuitaba!”

liangnianqian,zuixianzhidaochiyianyou20yijiazhuangjiushishenru,takanbushangshigequezidechiyian,keweileqian,tabanhongbanporangfuchengkaidayingquchiyian。

tayeshidiyigezhixiaochiyianshizong,shibeifuchengkaikaichezhuangledeyuangu,tadangjiliduan,rangfuchengkaihechiyuweizaiyiqi。

fuchengkaizhongqingdebenjiushichiyuwei,meilechiyian,erziruyuanqulechiyuwei,zhaoyangnadaonei20yibushuo,hainengwenzhuchijiaderenbugaofachehuodeshi,yijusande。

kerujin,chiyianhuilaile……

shenruyouzhongjiguansuanjin,queyaojifeidandadeganjue。

yanmolenglengdikanzheshenru,yizhengyanci:“fufuren,woshibushihushuobadao,baojingyichajiuzhidaole!dangnianhaihaowomingda,beihaoxinrenjiule,zaiyiyuanhunmiyinian。

qianqianhouhouzuolewushucishoushu,zheicaiyoujihuizhanzaizheili!nixiangyijuhuajiumoshanierzidezuixing,kemeineimerongyi!”

“ni……”yitingdaobaojing,shenrumingxianxinxule。

yanmomeizailihuishenru,tazhuantouhenhendidingzhefuchengkaicangbaidelian,shengyinxiangchehuichang:“fuchengkai,neitianwanshangxiazhedayu,nikaichezhuangwohoujiupaole,nizuomengdoumeixiangdao,wohuimeisiba?!”

fuchengkaijinminzhechun,yishizhijian,wuyanyidui。

zaichangdebinke,liantongkanhunlizhiboshipindeguanzhongmen,doujingdaile。

biqizaichangdebinke,guanzhongmendejianpanjiubuneimekeqile,duojiameitidezhiboshipinshang,cikeyijingshidanmubaping:

“fujiadenanrenchulejiuye,gegehuaxin,buransunziyebuhuihetangyeyeyibanda,rujinfuchengkaipaihuaizailiangjiemeizhijian,zhenshiexindaojiale。”

“kao,zheigefuchengkaijianzhijiushixiandaichenshimei,buxiangqurenjiazhishuojiushile,haixiangshasirenjia,taitamadebushirenle!”

“tingshuoliangnianqianfuchengkaizhisuoyidayingquchiyianneigequezi,shiyinweitamendafangnuoyonglezhishengjituan20yigongkuan,beijiuyelelingliangnianneibushangzheibiqian,tacongyikaishikanshangdejiubushirenjiaguniang,ershirenjianei20yijiazhuang。”

“cao,fuchengkaihezhishichenshimei,jianzhishitamadechushengburu!”

……

yankanzheichangshijihunlichengleshijixiaohua,fuchengkaidefuqinfuhaimanglianxihunlizongcehua,rangtabazhibodoutingle。

zhiboshipinyixiaziquanheile,zheigengjiazuoshidanmushangshuodedoushizhende。

haohaodehunliyixiazibianchengzheiyang,chiyuweichongguolai,xiangeguisidezhuazhuchiyiandeshoubei:“chiyian,nihushuo!dangnianmingmingshinihejialidebaobiaozaibanshanbieshutouqing,beiwohechengkaizhuangjian,chengkaicaikaiche……”

youxierenyiji,jiurongyibiannaocan。

chiyuweizheimeshuodengyutifuchengkaichengrenletadangnianguyikaichezhuangchiyiandeshi。

dengtahuiguoshenlaihou,yijingwanle。

“touqing?”yanmolengxiao,“chiyuwei,dangnianshinipianwoshuofuchengkaizaibanshanbieshudengwo,kewoqudaonali,quejiandaonihefuchengkaiyishanbuzhengdebaozaiyiqi。

wodangchangtichutuihunchengquannimen,niquetanxinbuzu,songyongfuchengkaikaichezhuangwo,shuozhiyaowoyisi,nei20yijiushinidejiazhuang,chiyuwei,nikezhenshiwodehaomeimeia!”

yanmoshuodesuiranshibanzhenbanjia,danyinweitaquanchengyizhengyanci,qingxubaoman,binkemendouxinle。

“好恶毒的女人!”

“xiangnanrenxiangfengleba,lianzhunjiefudougouda!”

“真是不要脸!”

“**,nihushuo!”qidaofakuangdechiyuweiyangqishouyaodayanmo,quebeiyanmoxianyibuzhuazhushouwanmengdituikaile。

“kanlainimenshiyidianhuiyidoumeiyou,neijiubuguaiwobugujiemeiguanxile,woxianzaijiubaojing,nimenjiudengzhechilaofanba!”shuowan,yanmocongbaolinachushouji。

“dengyixia!”chijiananyishengdahe,jimangzhuazhuyanmodeshou,“doushiyijiaren,youhuahaoshuo!”

liyaoyibianmoyanlei,yibiankenqiu:“shiya,anan,yuweizaizenmeshuoyeshinidemeimei,erqie……nixianzaibuyemeishima?”

fuchengkaidebamayegenzhekaikou:“shiya,yian,jintianguohou,chengkaihaiyaojiaoniyishengjiejieni,nizheiyangshixiangrangwomenliangjiadoudiujinlianmianma?”

yigege,konghejiadaodebangjia,quandangchiyianzheiliangnianzhishiqudujiayiyang!

kezhenzhengchiyianyijingsile,tamenni,bandiankuijiudeyisidoumeiyou!

yanmoxinlidehenxiongyongzhe。