第1章
“daihuiyidingyaohaohaogenrenjialiao，zheikeshininiangxiangjinbanfabangniqiulaideyinyuan，qianwanbiecuoguole！youshimeishibiebaichuyifuchoujiazi，nixianzaiyijingbushidangbingdeshihoula！”
“xingxingxing，wozhidaolelaoniang，buguowochouhuashuoqiantou，yaoshirenjiameikanshangwo，woshibuhuisipilailianchanzherenjiade。”
guashangdianhua，zhangfanzhongyusonglekouqi。
yaobushilaoniangqiangpo，zijishijueduibukenlaixiangzheigeqinde。
zhangfantacongmeitanguolianai，ruwushiernian，yizhidoushizuidingjiandebingwang。
zhikexi，huidaojiangnanshihou，zhifenpeidaoyigexiaoqubaoanduizhangdezhiwu。
anzhaolaomajidefangjianhao，zhangfanqiaolejixiamen，erhoulimaodizoujinlebaojian。
budebushuo，laomadeyanguangjianzhijuele！
yanqiandeguniangbujinmoyangjunqiao，neishencaigengshixianshapangren！
jingzhixinidexiaozuituzheyimohongchun，kandezhangfanxinlipengpengzhitiao！
youqineihuzhiyuchudeaorenshangwei，jijuxingganheyouhuo，kandezhangfanbixuezhiliu！
淡定！
zhangfanzhijiezuodaolenvhaiduimian。
nvhaixianshijinge，erhouliuyemeiyiwan，shifenjingjuedikanzhezhangfan。
qiaozheijiashi，gumozijishimeixile。
zhangfanqingkejisheng，yebufeihua，zhijiebazijidetiaojianshuochulekou。
“xiawuhao，wojiushizhangfan，shijiangnanyichugaodangxiaoqudebaoanduizhang，nianxinwuliuwan，youyitaosanshipingmidelaofangzi，zhiyuqiche，haizainulizhong。”
zheizhongtiaojian，shuochulaishizaiyouxiediuren。
yebuzhizhangfannalilaideyongqi。
ketafanershifendanding，bijingxingwuchushen，dachangmianjiandeduole，lianpiziranshizugouhou。
meinvdehongchunweiweiyipie，lianshangdaizhexiexuxiaoyi。
kenengshiganjueyanqiandenanrenyouxiekeai，guerweiweifaxiao。
“wojiaogusumuyu，shijiangnantiangejituandezongcai，qunianfubusijiangnanbang，caifupaixingruleqianshi，zongzichan，yejiusanqianduoyiba。”
**！
老娘你牛逼啊！
zheiyangdebaifumei，nishizenmehuyoulaigenwoxiangqinde？
tazijixinlixiangdangqingchu，heyanqianzheiguniangdediweichajujianzhijiushitianrangzhibie。
buguojiranlaile，debahuashuoqingchu，qimahuiquhaogenzijidelaomuqinjiaocha。
“wokenengzhengdebuduo，danwoyoujuexinshouhunideanquan，baozhengburanghuairenpengniyigenshouzhitou。”
“shourudehua，suiranyinianzhiyoujiwankuai，dannifangxin，woyidingrushushangjiao，rangnichongmananquangan。”
zheishizhangfandequanbudipai。
duimiandegusumuyu，zaiyekezhibuzhuzijidemianbubiaoqing，wuzhuduzi，hahadaxiaoleqilai。
“nizheirenzhendou......xixixi！”
zuoweigaolengfandejituanzongcai，gusumuyuyijinghenduonianmeiyouxiaoderucikaixinle。
kezheiqueyinqilezhangfandeqiangliebuman。
“guniang，wotiaojianshimeinihao，nidangmianxiaohuawo，zheiyanghenbuzunzhongren。”
“ok，ok，womeiyoubuzunzhongni，zhishiwoxiangduinishuo，xiansheng，nishibushizoucuofangjianle？”
“我去！”
zhangfanganjinpaochuqu，duileduishoujilidefangjianhao。
meicuo，shi666fangjianya！
gusumuyushanyidilakailianzi，zhilezhilouxiadekazuo，weixiaodikanzhezhangfanshuodao。
“woguji，niyuedeshikazuo666hao，wozheilishichaojivipbaojian。”
zhangfanganmanghoutuijibu，yigeliangqiang，chadianmeishuaizaidishang。
就说吗！
laoniangshenmeshihouyouneimedadebenshi，nenganpaiqianyifumeihewoxiangqin！
“buhaoyisihaguniang，wokenengyoudianshejiaoniubizheng，dezui......dezui。”
zhangfanjimangxialelou，zhaodaoleweiyuyilouguaijiaochude666zhuo。
guoran，neiliyouyiweishenqingjiaolvdenvren，gujizaoyidengdebunaifanle。
congcemiankan，nvrendemoyangyetingjingzhi，suiranwufagenloushangdegusumuyuduibi，danzuoweiputongguniangeryan，yijingsuanshifeichangpiaoliangle。
“shizaibaoqian，gangcaiyujiandianshiqing，wojiaozhangfan，zhiyeshibaoanduizhang，gangcaiwo......”
“shenme？baoanduizhang！”
neinvdeyitingzhiye，dunshixianqiqilai。
“你买的起房吗？”
“买的起车吗？”
“jinhouyoulexiaohai，ninengjitatigonghenhaodejiaoyuma？”
“qiongguiyige，hailaixiangqin？huitouyoulehaizi，renjiayiwentafuqinshiganshenmede，tayidinghuifeichangzibei，langfeilaoniangshijian！”
suihoumeinvnachubao，zhijietaochusanbaikuaiqianzazaizhuozishang。
“xiangnizheiyangdeqionggui，gujiyehebuqizheijiagaodangchatingdeshui，zhangwomaile，yongbieqionggui！”
ta‘pa’deyixiaqishen，erhoutouyebuhuidilikailechating。
suiranshifaturan，kezhangfandaoyebuzenmeshengqi。
zheiyangyehao，benlaizijijiubuxiangxiangqin，huiqugenlaoniangyesuanyougejiaodai。
zhengdangtadasuanhuijiaqushi，datinglituranfashengleyiwai。
yigeyuemowusuidaxiaodexiaonvhaimanmiantonghong，huxishifenkunnan，xiangshihoulongkazhuleshenmedongxi。
daitachulaideshiyiduifuqi，nanrennianjikanshangqutingdade，nvrendaotingnianqing，gumoyangziyejiusanshichutou。
yankannverchenglezheiyang，kebafuqierrenjihuaile。
“yueyue！yueyue！nizenmele？”
“niganjinda120qiujiua！”
zhangfancongtamenshenbianjingguo，qinyanmuduleyanqiandeyiqie。
tashijunyichushen，cishijiranpengjian，zenmenengxiushoupangguan？
“xiaoguniangkadongxile，nimenbuhuijijiu，kuaishankai，biedanwulezuijiaqiangjiushijian！”
suizhezhangfandahouyisheng，quanchangzhuyilidoujujiaozaitadeshenshang。
chatinglidekerenyilunfenfen。
yourenshuotashizhuangbi，yeyourenzhiyitadenengli。
“jiutazheizhongchuanzhe，wobuxiangxintayoubenshizhihaozheixiaoguniang。”
“kanbuchulaima？zheinandeyouxinji，zhidaozheiliangkouziyouqian，xiangguyilageguanxi。”
“meicuo，conggangkaishijinlai，wojiufaxian，zheilaoxianshengchuandeshisituertezuanshibanxizhuang，quanqiu**ershitao，jiagejiangjinbaiwanmeiyuan！”
“nvdeyebujiandanya，milanshizhuangzhou，wojianguozheitaohongqun，yidalidingjishejishishejide。”
zhangfangubushanghuiyingzheiqunwuliaoderen。
tahuanbaozhuxiaonvhai，yishouwoquan，shouzhangdingzaixiaonvhaifubu，erhouyiqiantuigong，houtuidengdefangshilaolaozhanwen，suihoukuaisuchongji、jiyaxiaonvhaidefubu，haorangtanengbaqiguanyiwupaichu。
keyilianshilejixia，nvhaidoumeiyoumingxianhaozhuan。
zheiranglaozhehenhuaiyizhangfanhuibuhuihaimulikejijiu。
zaijiashangshenhourentianyoujiacudefeiyi，laozhedunshiqingxubengkui，danudichongzhangfanhoudao。
“nidaodihuibuhuia？xiangpianwoqian，mendoumeiyou！”