第三章:回来娶媳妇

“songshou——nixiangganshenme?”

nvjingjile,jiaoqiaodexiaolianshangshanguoyisiyijuzhise。

yanqianzheigenanrenkansihensuiyidichushou,querangtahaowudikangzhili。

renpingtashijinliqixiangyaozhengkai,nazhuzijideshouwandeshouzhangquexiangshitieqianyiban!

qingjizhixia,nvjingdelingyizhishouyijingmoxiangyaojiandepeiqiang。

hanchujiangxiangshihaowuchajue,wuzixiaodao:“nimenlingdaoxiachele,wohaishihetashuoba。”

liangrenxiangshiyiduizainaobieniudexiaoqinglv,lalachechedixiangjingchefangxiangzouqu。

jingcheshangguoranyouxialaiyigesanshilaisuidenanjingcha!

shenhoujigedahantongshijingchuyinaomenzihan。

“zheixiaozitaitemehule……nalaizheimebiaodehanhuo?”

“doutemebiechele,yihuijijingchakanwanzhengjiandeshihou,jiushuozanmenjizheganlu,buzhuijiuneixiaozidezeren!”

laidaonanjingguangenqianshi,hanchujiangcaisongkaixiaonvjingdeshouwan。

“chenxiansheng,haojiubujian。”

yanqianzheixingchende,jiushuyulaotouzizuili“bugaizhaorederen”。

xiaonvjingyuanbenshixiangfahuolaizhe,zheishiyitingbuyouzhoumeidao:“chendui,nimenrenshi?”

chenxianyunxiaoerbuda,fanerchongneijigedahanzhaozhaoshou。

dahanmenyetingdaohanchujiangdeneijuhuale,buyouxinlikuangxi。

“women……womenjizheganlu,cheziyemeishenmedaai,jiubuzhuijiule。”

“shia,zheiweixiaoxiongdiyikanjiubushiguyide。”

“zangexiugedechejiuxing。”

tamenhaisuanjiling,jiazhuanghaipachenxianyuntanhuhanchujiangdeyangzi,xiangjiejituoshen。

hanchujiangxinlianzanzheijirenshiqu,danbingweichusheng,ershikanxiangchenxianyun。

xiaonvjingqueyishidaoyouxiebuduijing。

zhengxiangkaikoushi,chenxianyunshuohuale:“yeling,chulizheixieshideshihou,womenhaishiyaoyidiaojieweizhu。”

“jirantamenshuangfangdouyuanyihubuzhuijiu,dengjiyixiabeigeanrangtamenganjinzou,miandeyihuiduche。”

堵车?

xiaonvjingyelinghenshidaimengdidaliangleyixiagonglu。

zheiduanlusuiranbuxianglongjushanshangdegongluneiyangpianpi,danyanxiayemeijiliangche,nahuiduche?

danjiranchenduifahuale,yelingyebuhaodangmianbochi。

tazhidaochenduideweiren,zheimechulikendinglingyouyinqing。

baneijigedahandafazouhou,yelingyebeichenxianyunzhidaojingcheshang。

“nijiujingxiangganshenme?”

chenxianyunkuxiaoyisheng,dijihanchujiangyizhiyan。

hanchujiangbaishoujujue,diaokandao:“nishenmeshihouyouleyanyinde?”

chenxianyunmengxiyikou,caidadao:“neijianshizhihou,wozaiguowailuledi,bushihezaizuoguowaideyewu。”

“diaohuilaihou,rangwonaotoudeshitaiduo。”

hanchujiangtingchutahualiyouhua,ledao:“fangxin。wokendingbuhuirangninaotou。”

chenxianyunzuijiaoyichou:“neinihaohaodeyanluowangbudang,paohuilaiganma?”

hanchujiangliangshouyitan:“huilaiquxifua。”

陈先云:……

qiruoyingdeziliaojiushichenxianyunchuanjihanchujiangde,danchenxianyunbingbuxiangxintashihuilaiquxifuerde。

nidouburenshirenjia,jiuyaoqurenjia?

hanchujiangyoule,paipaitadejianbangdao:“niyezhidaowodeguiju。”

chenxianyunchenshengdao:“yanluodianyongbingyongbutazuhuaxia。”

hanchujiangyebuzaixiangzhiqianneiyangkaiwanxiao,ershihenrenzhendao:“santianzhinei,nihuicongnimendequdaoshoudaowotuichudexiaoxi。”

chenxianyundiantou:“santian。ruguomeiyouxiaoxi,woyidinghuizhaodaoni。”

hanchujiangzuijiaoqingtiao,danranyixiao:“ruguomeiyouxiaoxi,nizhihuizaiguowaizhaodaowo。”

ruguobushitaguyiliuxiahenji,chenxianyunyebukenengzheimekuaizhaodaoziji。

chenxianyunziranyemingbaizheigedaoli,zhuanershuoqiqitashi:“neixieren,nidasuanzenmezuo?”

tashuodeshigangcaineijigedahan。

lianyelingdounengchajuexiqiaodeshi,chenxianyundangranbukenengxiubuchulai。

hanchujiangxiao,dafeisuowendao:“dangchuzaiwaimian,wojiuguonisanci,yebangguonimenhenduomang。”

chenxianyunyileng,zheijiahuoyuelaiyuebuyaolianle。

xieentubaodehua,doushuodezheimeziran,baimingleshixiangrangzijititashanhou。

“别搞出人命。”

chenxianyunzaiciwunaikuxiao,liuxiayijuhuazhuanshenshanglejingche。

……

ruyehoudeninghaigewaipiaoliang,youqishihongluojiubalideneixieyaoyannvren。

zaijudadeyinleshengli,zheixiechimeiwangliangyaotouluanbeng,henbudebashenshangdeyifuhemouxielingjiandoushuaichuqu。

“daobage,zhenbunengguaiwomen,doushineigeturanzhuangshangwomendechouxiaozi。”

“made,juranrangyiliangwulinghongguangchadianzhuangfei,shuochuquwodouxiandiuren……”

baitiangenzongqiruoyingdeneiwugedahanjuzaiyijianguibinshi,zhengxiangyigelianshangzhangzhedabalaidenanrenhuibao。

dabalaihenhendengtamenyiyan,madao:“meiyongdefeiwu!nimenbuhuibaneixiaoziyeyiqishoushidiao?”

dahanjixujiaoyuan:“yaobushixunluodejingchachuxian,wokendingbaneichouxiaozidaihuilai,haohaojiaotazuoren!”

huayingangluo,chuangkouchuchuanlaiyidaowanweideshengyin:“xianzaijiaowoyebuchi。”

guibinshilidejirentongshiyijing,zhuantoukanxiangchuangkou。

“是你?”

“daobage,jiushita!”

“nizheichouxiaozijuranhaiganzaizheichuxian?”

dabalaiqueshitamenzhongzuiqingxingderen。

yaozhidao,tamenxianzaizaidedifangshisanlou。

erqie,hongluojiubakebushishenmeliangshanzhidi!

zheirenjuranshenbuzhiguibujuedichuxianzaichuangwai,danjiuzheifenbenshi,jiuzuyirangdabalaixinshengjingti。

hanchujiangshenziyidong,yijinglaidaowugedahanhedabalaizhongjian。

“nimenzhuanghuaiwodewulingshenche,wobudezhaonimenpeia?”

dahanzhongdeyigedunshidanu,conghouyaochuchouchuyibazhangbishou,shuhuzhaxianghanchujiang。

“呯!”

yebuzhidaozenmede,nabishoudejiahuohurandaofeichuqu,henhenzhuangzaiqiangshang。

zhuangjishengzhong,qitajirenyinyuetingdaoleshenrendeguzhesheng,buyoudoushidahai。

hanchujianghaozhengyixia,danrandikantamenyiyan:“xianzainenghaohaoshuohuama?”

dabalaiqiangrenzhexindidejingjuzhiyi,guzuoqiangyingdao:“xiongdizainatiaodaoshangzoudong?”

“baogewan,miandedashuichonglelongwangmiao。”

hanchujiangjiantahaizaizhuangqiangzuoshi,xinliyishihenbunaifan。

“wogenlongwangbuzhaomian。”

“tashihailidewang,erwo——”

“shiyanluodianlidewang!”

huayinyiluo,hanchujiangshenxingrutongguimeibanxiaoshizaiyuandi。

zheijianguibinshilixiangqiyizhenzhenzhuangjishenghecanjiaosheng。