第1章

“你没脑子吗?”

“chunhuo,bazheigelenggongyezhongmaixueli,bujiushixianchengdexuerenle。”

tuchatingdaoyourenzheiyangshuo,xinlihaizaiyihuo,shenmelenggong?shenmexueren?

xiayike,cigudehanlengcongtoumaidaojiao,rangtaruzhuibingku。

tuchayigejiling,mengdizhengyan。

zheishitacaifaxian,zijibeibangzhe,shenshangduimaizhehouhoudejixue,shoujiaomabi,xinlvxiajiang,yishiyekaishihuanghule。

zaizheiyangxiaqu,tahuidongsi!

fujinyouhaitongdeshengyinzaixinao。

“hahahaha,lenggongyezhongbianxuerenla!”

“bagongzhu,nikanwoduideyezhongxuerenzhenbuzhen?”

“jinrizheiyezhongnengbobagongzhuyixiao,shitatiandaderongxing。”

……

tuchaxinlishengqiyigubuxiangdeyugan。

tashenhuxi,binglengdekongqiqinrufeifu,zhijiaorenduosuo,suihoutabiezhezheikouqi,mengdiwangqianyizhuang。

簌簌簌簌。

xueduipokai,tuchaliangqiangshuaixuedishang,zhouweiyiqunchuanguzhuangdexiaohaizi,dayuesiwuge,jianzhuangjianjiaozhepaokai。

荼茶:“……”

太好了,是熊孩子!

zhuolaiguoshangmianbaokangfangyouguozhayizha,gebidegoudouchankule。

“xiaodianxia!”yidaojinghuangshicuodeshengyinchuanlai。

tuchahaimeifanyingguolai,jiubeirenbaoqilai,guojinwennuandehuaili。

neihuaibaodaizhedandandezaojiaoxiangqi,danboxueshoudanbaodehenjin。

tuchataitou,duishangyishuangfahongdeyanjing,yijidongshangcunliedelian。

轰!

kandaozheizhanglian,taiyangxuezhenzhabandeteng,daliangjiyisuipianyongrunaohai。

她穿书了。

congxiandaichuandaolegudaiwangchao,chenglediemeiainiangzaoshidelenggongxiaogongzhu。

yuanzhujinnianwusui,fuyichushengjiubeidiudaolenggongzishengzimie。

hougongyiguanbaigaocaidi、luojingxiashi,queyishaoshidoushipingchang,jibianyougongnvyangugudezhaoliao,yuanzhuyehuodehenjiannan。

jinnianwusuiqueshouxiaorusansuiyouer,chanruodexiangyingyangbuliangdexiaonaimao。

jiuzaigangcai,jiejiebagongzhulingzhejigexunguizidi,jiangyuanzhumaixueliduichengxuerenqule,yuanzhuyikouqimeichengzhuqule。

jiezhe,tuchajiuchuanlaile。

荼茶重重叹了口气。

地狱开局啊。

“xiaodianxialengbuleng?youmeiyoushoushang?naliteng?”yanguguyibianjiekaitashoujiaoyibianwen,“shilaonubuhao,bugaifangdianxiayigerendaizhe。”

jingeyijingmeichidele,tazaozaoquleyushanfang,xiangduoyaojikuaitiangao。

qiliaoyimeikanzhe,xiaodianxiajiubeibagongzhudengrenbalepoao,bangzhushoujiaomaijinxueli。

zheikeshishujiuhandonga,chengnianrendoubuganzhedanyizhanxuedili,genghekuangbenjiutiruodewusuihaizi。

yanguguyouqiyouxinteng,ketazhishigegongnv。

tasuibaojinxiaodianxia,lianzhemeimu,maitouguibaixiaqu。

tuchazhitingtashuo:“nubijianguobagongzhu,numeikanguanhaolenggongzuiren,rangzuirenzanglegongzhuguiyan,qinggongzhuzefa。”

meirenshuohua,zhiyouhuhudefengxuesheng,chuiderenpifuciteng。

yanguguzhongfushuo,shuodaodisanbiandeshihou,yituanxuezatatoushang。

diertuanxue,disantuan,disituan……

wushudexuetuanzaguolai,yangugugongzheshen,xianghuzaidelaomuji,jiangtuchayanmidehuzaihuaili。

tahaidishenganfu:“xiaodianxiabupa,zhishixuetuanzi,zadaobutengde。”

tuchamousezhuanshen,zenmekenengbuteng?etoudoubeizahongle。

taniutoukanchuqu,yiqunhaizifangsixiaonao,youguizhebudongdehuobazi,tamenxuezhangwandegengjinxingle。

qizhong,zhongyonghoufujiadexiaoshizitiaodezuihuan,zadexuetuanzuiduo。

tuchajide,zhongyonghoufushibagongzhudewaijia,liangrenshibiaoxiongmeiguanxi。

“yangugu,”tuchaqinghan,coudaotaerbiandigu,“yihuizheiyangneiyang……”

yangugubiaoqingfuza,youyudedianlediantou。

yushi,yiqunhaizijiujian“huobazi”cengdezhanqilai。

zhongrenhaimeifanyingguolai,woyanguguhuailidetuchazuoshouyiyang,jidandaxiaodexuetuanzaxiaoshizijiaobian。

xiaoshizilenglexia,jiezhedashengchaoxiao:“zhanzhedoudabuzhong,bukuishiyezhongzheimefeiwu。”

“野种!废物!”

“野种!废物!”

……

yangugushenshouquwutuchadeerduo,haojiaotabuyaotingdaozheixiehua。

raner,tuchabenjiubuzaiyi。

xiaoshizichongdaojinqianjiaoxiao:“nizawosa,nizawosa,nizawosa。”

荼茶眼睛亮了。

wawawa,dianshijuliyandedoushizhende!tizheizhongyaoqiudechunhuo,zhongyurangtayudaole!

tuchajicanlandexiaole:“haodee。”

manzu!bixumanzu!jiabeimanzu!

tagaoyangyoushou,jiangdiertuanxuezhaozheduifangnaomenhenhenzaguoqu。

xiaoshizihaizaibengda,xiakenaomenjuteng,yanqianyihei,xiaoguxiaogudexuebiubiubiaoshe。

tafanyingbuguolai,tuchachenjiwangxuelizaiyilao。

咚!

disantuanxuezaxiaoshizibizishang。

xiaoshizigengtengle,aodeyisangzitongkuchusheng。

naomendexuehebixuehengliu,zhengzhanglianxianxuelinli,kanzhejiuheren。

yizhonghaizinalijianguozheiyangdechangjing,quandouhedaile。

tuchalouzhuyangugubozi:“pao!”

yangugubaojinta,batuijiupao。

daitapaochusizhangyuan,neixiehaizicaihuiguoshenlai。

“tazadexuetuanliguoleshitou!”

“xiaoshizibiliangbeizaduanla,kuaijiaoyuyi。”

“daizhuta,yongshitoudasizheigeyezhong。”

……

yangugupaodehenkuai,erbianshihuhulengfeng,tuchapazaitajiantou,chaohoukanqu。

yaoyaode,tadeshixianduishangbagongzhu。

congtoudaowei,bagongzhuwuzhejinsiwennuanshoulu,yuanyuanzhanneikanzhe。

tabushuohuayebuqinzixiachang,zhishikantuchadeyanshen,huoxiangkanyizhibeixishuadeyingoulaoshu。

dequjiuduokanliangyan,meiyisinongsiyewuguanjinyao。

fenmingshitongnianyue、tongritongshichenchushengdezimei,liangrenzhijiandechaju,wanrulannihejiaoyue。

yirenyibubiti、shibuguofu,huodexianggegouqieqier。

yirenqueshiqianjiaobaichong,chuandejinyichideyushi,gaogaozaishang。

真是傲慢又恶毒。

tuchamousejianshen,qiaoqizuijiaoxiaole。

heng,xiaorenbaochoucongzaodaowan,jitadengzhe!

“xiaodianxia,tamenzhuiguolaile。”yangugupinpinhuitoukan。

bagongzhumeifasheng,zheijigegoutuizihensiwujidan。

tuchaxinnianjizhuanjian,naohailituranchuanlaizizidianliuyin。

【zi……zizi……saomiaosuzhushuju……】

【youzaiyangyuxitong……bangdingchenggong……】

tuchayanqianyihua,jiezheshiyelijiuduolegeshujumianban。

talaibujixikan:“xitong,kuailaigejiejuefangan。”

tazheiyangbujianwai,lianxitongdoukadunleyixia。

【……zi……xinshoufulifafangzhong……】

shunke,tuchashouliduolegexiaoshaozi。

【pingpingwuqidesuliaoshaozi:keyichuixiang2cidedaoju,chuixianghousuijizhaohuan,wufazhidingzhaohuanwu。】

死马当活马医。

tuchahaobuyouyuchuixiangdiyisheng。

咻——

jitiaohuasebuyidekuzi,hualalatuolilezhuren,huankuaidesuixuehuafeiwu。

tuchakanqingle,zhongyonghouxiaoshizijingranaichuansao|fensexieku!

jirenmengbi,zhanzaixuedililengzhule。

tuchayehenmeng,zheizhaohuandeshawanyier?!

她吹响第二次。

咻咻——

yidaohuangsecanying,soudecongyangugumianqiancuanguoqu。

yanguguhaimeikanqing,shenhoujiuchuanguikulanghaodekuhanshenghexiongmengdequanfei。

她回头往后看。

xuedili,yitiaohuangzongmaosededagouzizhengzhuizherennian,paomanlede,gouziaowupushangqu。

yushi,zheiqunxunguizidilianzuihoudezhexiuxiekuyemeile。

baihuahuadexuedili,shiyiqunbaihuahuadeguang**danzi。

tuchakandeshixingdafa:“a,baibaide**;a,duanduandejier。”

就会两句,没了。

燕姑姑:“……”

shanghaibuda,wuruxingjiqiang,xinliyinyingjizhong。

piaofeidefengxueli,zaishilangsongdenaiyinli,kuhaoshenggengdagengcanle。

zhiyubagongzhu,zaigouzichuxianshi,zaobeitieshengongnvbaozhelikaile。

bagongzhukeshijinzhiyuye,yaoshishoulejinghe,sheidoudandaibuqi。

buyihui,lenggongfujinmeirenle。

yangugusonglekouqi:“meixiangdaodahuangpingshibuliren,guanjianshihouyoushizhenshang,shitiaohaogou。”

shaozixiaoshile,tuchawangyanguguhuailigonglegong,zhongyuchengbuzhule。

bazhangdadexiaolianshaodetonghong,bizheyanjinghunshenchouchu,hairendehen。

yangugudajing:“xiaodianxia!”

tahunjueguoqu,yishixianjinyipianbaisedekongjianli,yanqianxuanfuzhegerenxinximianban。

【宿主姓名:荼茶】

【zhongzu:yizhulvchaxiaomiaomiao(gangguofayaqidezhiwuxizaizai(✧◡✧))】

【shentizhuangtai:bingruotizhicha,yanzhongyingyangbuliang,jidubujiankang!】

【shouming:7tian(haoduanmingdezai!daku.jpg)】

……

shoumingdaojishi,shuzixianhongxianhongde,jingquedaomiao。

tuchayixiajinzhang,xiaoxinzangtileti。

tabalamianban,chuolechuo“zhongzu”lianggezi。

tucha:“suiranwomingzidaicha,danyoumeiyoukeneng,woshigerenhuoshengshengderen。”

系统:“?”

xitongdashengfanbo:“bukeneng!wosaomiaochulaidelinghundise,nijiushigelvcha!”

荼茶:“……”

bushi,zenmehaimarenni?

turan,mianbanshanshuohongguang,xiangwanyouxishidecanxuetixing。

xitongjianruibaoming:“baobao!nigaoshao40℃,zaibujiangwenjiuhuishaochengfeiyan,qitianhouyaozhe。”

tuchadanding:“nishixitong,jiwolaidianbuyaoeryu。”

xitongshengyinlikeguanfang:“youzaichengzhangguochengzhongdekunnan,qingzixingjiejue。”

mole,tayuqihuankuaisanfen:“lvchabaojiayou,nishizuibangda!”

荼茶沉默。

banshang,taqingyanxiyudeshuo:“zhenxianmunimentong,doubuhuifashao,buxiangwoshaoqilaihuobuguoqitian,zaozaojiuyaoqusileni。”

系统:“???”

nalaiyinqizheimezhongdelvchawei?!