第一章 欺负棒梗

1961nian,sijiucheng,nantongluoguxianghutong。

yizhenhuayizaisiheyuandamenchuyuanqiangshangshaizhetaiyang。

tingdaoshuxidejiaobusheng,taerduoweidong,turanbayizhijiaoshenlechuqu。

“哎呦!”

gangzouchudamen,banggenglengbudingbeibanlegedamapa。

wutitoudibushuo,zuanzaishoulidangbaobeidejigenxiaobianpaoyebeitashuailechuqu。

zailiushiniandai,meijiameihuzhiyouguonianshinengmaixiebianpao,fuguiderenjiamai200xiang、500xiangdebianpao,tiaojianchadianrenjiazhinengcengyicenglinjude,tinggexiang,dangshizijiafanglebianpao。

xiaohaizinengfendaojishigexiaobianpaojiukeyizuoyiduanshijiandehaiziwang,xiangshouqitahaizixianmujidudeyanshen。

zheijigenbianpaoshibanggenghaoburongyinonglaide,tahaizhunbeinaquzuoduzhu,hetongxuewandupaoyouxiduoyingxiebianpao。

laibujijixuhutong,banggengwangqianpaqu,shenshouxiangyaobaneijigenxiaobianpaozhongxinchuaiqilai。

【di,gaoshizhi+7……xitongzhengzaichongnengjihuozhong,qingsuzhuzaijiezaili,duoduogaoshi。】

yizhenhuadalieliejiangzijidejiaoshouhuiqu。

guzuoguanqiedidunxiaqufuta,“buxiaoxin”dinianguojigenhongbianpao,shengpabianpaonengyong,jiaoxiahaijiazhonglidaoduonianlejilaihui。

kaiwanxiao,bandoubanle,buduoqifuqifu,nengrangbanggengcongtayanqianhulunguoqu?

“niqiaoni,douduodaderenlezouluhaibukanlu,guogedamendounengbeimenjianbandao,zezeze。”

yizhenhuaguanqieweiwendao,zuilibuwangzabaliangsheng,chaofengdeyisixiangdangmingxian。

banggengshuaidehunshenteng,yanzhengzhengkanzhezijixinaidebaobeibianpaobeicailan。

zaitingdaoyizhenhuabuyaolianhushuobadao。

banggengyizhangbaipangxiaolianzhangdetonghong,qihuhudiyongsanjiaoyandengxiangyizhenhua。

mingmingjiushitabande,xianzailaizhuangshenmehaoren,zhenbuyaolian!

haicai!zijidoukandaoletahaicai!!

kanbanggengyouxiangyaodakudajiaohanrenjitazuozhudequshi,yizhenhuafushenguanxintadeshihou,“bujingyijian”yigezhoujizoudaotaxiabashang。

jiezhezhuangmozuoyangdao:“qiaoqiaozheishuaide,xiabadoushuaiqingle?zenmebukua,shibushibuteng?ng?”

tengtongrangbanggengbayanleibiehuiqu:“wuwu……”

tagandadu,tayaoshigankuyisheng,heixingandeyizhenhuajueduihuizoutadunhende。

poyuweiliweixie,banggenglianbianpaoyebujianle,wuzhexiabadiandianpaoyuan,shengpayizhenhuazaijitayixiazi。

【di,gaoshizhi+8……xitongzhengzaichongnengjihuozhong,qingsuzhuzaijiezaili,duoduogaoshi。】

kanzherenpaoyuan,yizhenhuajiangdishangnengyongdebianpaojianqilaifangjindouli,limiandexiaotaliuzheyouyongchu。

zhanqilai,shenleshenlanyao,shundaidaleyigedadadehaqian。

jintianshidongrilinandedehaotianqi,taiyangshaizaishenshangnuanyangyangde,tashufudemiqiyanjing。

xiangxiangmaoletouyoumeidongjingdexitong,yizhenhuazainaozilizhuomo,yihuishizashazhujiadeguohaishishuaibanggengjiadewan。

weilezangounengrangxitongjihuodegaoshizhi,tazheixierizimeishaoganquedeshi。

pianpiantawaibiaozhangdeguaiqiaokeai,zuibanengdiandaoheibai……pei,shinengshuohuidao,haihuichayiweizhuang。

ancuocuogaowanshi,siheyuandeduoshurendouchajuebudao,youchajuedaodebirubanggeng,zeshiyoukushuobuchu。

这样不道德?

yizhenhuachixiaoyisheng,taaiguoshoufa,shanliangyouhao,changchangzhurenweile,kengxiesiheyuanlidehuairenzenmele?!

buzhangyandezeilaotianbatarengdao《qingmansiheyuan》zheigeqinshoumandideshijie,tahaimeibaoyuanni。

shangbeizitayizhenhuabushuoshiyeyoucheng,haodaishigebudabuxiaodeliangxinqiyejia。

guerchushen,chengjiyouxiu,poyushengjigaozhongchuoxuequzhuanqian。

jiulilaiyanliqu,xinkuhaoxienian,zhengxiabiyushengyishiwuyoudecaifu。

gangxieyixiezhuizhuiju,haijuanleyidongloujidaxuezhunbeiruxiaoyuanzijidedaxuemeng!

睁眼就穿越了!

chuanchengyigebingbingyangyang,mingdoukuaimeiledebasuiguer!!

jinshouzhishiyou,xitongchuxianjilegexinshoulibao,haimeilaidejibangdingyounengliangbuzuxiumiandengdaijihuole。

易振华:“……”

tadeqian,tadedaxuemengquanmeile。

youshihoutingxiwangshijiehuimiede。

mosuozhedakaixinshoulibao,dedaoyigejiankangshentiheyizhangshenfenka。

tongshimoqinglezijichuanyuedeshijie——《qingmansiheyuan》deshijie。

jiushitagangkanwandedianshijuliyiyuanziqinshoudesiheyuan。

shangdaobashilaoren,xiadaobasuixiaohai,yigeyuanzizhaobuchujigehaorendesiheyuan。

yizhenhuaquedingshenfenkadeshihouzhuomoxiaobantian,jizijinongleyigelaitoubenyidayeyizhonghaideyuanfangqinqishenfen。

pingzheyizhangnengyanshandaohuihongrendezuiheguaiqiaojunxiudezhangxiang,yizhenhuachenggongbeisiheyuanlideyidayeyizhonghaishouyang。

zaijingjijinzhangdeliushiniandai,heyizhonghaicheshangguanxibushiyijianhuaishi。

zuoweihongxingyagangchangdebajiqiangong,yizhonghaigongzizuzuyoujiushijiukuaiqian!

zhurouyijincai6、7mao,qingcaidengshucaidejiagegengdi。

zheixietiandeshenghuoyezhengmingtadejuedingmeicuo。

zaiyidayejiachidehao,santiansidunrou,baimianmantouguangou。

yidayerenyouhuduzi,yibeiziwuerwunv,chengtiansuanjizhezhaorenjitayanglao,xianzaibengchutazheimeyigehaodaer,meishaohuzheta。

neixiekongzhiyuqiangheaidaodebangjiadequedian,hetamuqiannengdedaodehaochubiqilaidoubujiaoshi。

【di,gaoshizhi+6……】

jixiedexitongshengdaduanyizhenhuadesixu。

yizhenhuatiaomei,zheishitafangzaisheijialidesilaoshubeifaxianle?haishiwangsheiyifushangmohuibeiqiaozhele?

【xitongzhengzaichongnengjihuozhong……xitongchongnengchenggong!】

“!!!”