02
酒醒的时候。
woditoukankanyidilangjie，haiyouyidilangjiezhongtangzhedepeixingyong，taboziruanmianmiandidalazhe，sile。
夭寿了，我杀人了！
woyishijianhuangdebuxing，liangundaipadicengguoqu，shuangshouzaipeixingyongbozishangmoleyoumo，anleyouan，shiturangtaruanmianmiandebozizhongxinliqilai。
结果，没成功。
fanrengutouzheimecuidema？
naxiangwomenshea，wobozizhuanshibagequanniuchenggemahuadouhaoduanduande。
wanle，zheixiabujinshenxianzuobucheng，gujihaideyadaoxihudixiaqianerbabainianle。
baimeimeibuzhidaoshashihouliudaguolaide，haiqianzhewuzhiwujuedepeixingyongdehunpo。
baimeimeixiaohuawo，shuowodugeqingjiezahaibianchengshafuzhengdaoleni？
woyebuzhidaoya，zhunbeihaodexibenzibushizheiyangdeya。
congqianwomenzheiyizuchulegedayaobainiangzi，taqurenjianzhaolegefujunxuxian，ranhouenenyuanyuanshuimanjinshande，fanzhenglilegeqingjie，jieguojiugongdeyuanmanweiliexianbanle。
我是白娘娘的粉丝。
我也想当神仙。
keshiwoyoubuxiangbeilijiedetianleidadehunfeiposan。
mingfudebaiwuchang，yejiushibaimeimeijiwochulegezhao，rangwoqurenjianzhaogefuxinboxinglang，ligeqingjie，daoshihoushengshengsisisisishengshengshangyihui，woweiqingsuoshang，tushangjikouxintouxue，youcidachedawuyixinxiangdao，shuobudingnengduoguoleijiexiangbainiangniangyiyangweiliexianban。
peixingyongjiushibaimeimeitiwotiaode，tashuozheigenanrentaohuayanxiaobailian，yikanjiushixibenzilidefuxinboxinglang，yushiwojiukuanzhebuziruanzheyaozhi「pengqiao」waidaozaipeixingyonghuaili。
baimeimeiyemeixiangdaozijiyanguangzheimedula，zheinanrennashifuxinboxingya，fenmingshisharenfanghuodajiandae。
zhidaopeixingyongdelegongzhudeqingyanzhunbeidusiwozhihou，wonanguolejiri。
baimeimeixiaodebuxing，shuowoyigeyaojinghaizhidaoshenmejiaonanguoni？
feihua，woshisheyao，woyoubushigeshitouchengjing。
zongyouzuoxidechengfen，keneixierizizhenzhenshishi，lilizaimu。wohaijidepeixingyongmuqinbingshihou，tajianglianmaizaiwodexiuziliwushengtongkudeyangzi。
neishitashuo，「suniang，wozhiyounile。」
shuozhiyouwodeshita，yaoyibeidujiudusiwodehaishita。
rendexin，kebiwomenyaojinglengduole。
nanguoguinanguo，danwohaishifeisudihebaimeimeishangdinghaolejuben，daoshihouwohepeixingyongjiugeyihuier，jiuyinxiadujiu，qiqiaoliuxuehanhensiqu，ranhouzhimiyuqingshanggejishinianzaidachedawudedaofeisheng！
jubendouxiehaole，jieguofuzeyanxidewochulechazi，woshizhunbeihaoqiqiaoliuxuehanhenerzhongle，keshipeixingyongtashuowochou！tashuowolingrenzuoou！
真他娘的狗东西！
这谁能忍？
yushiwoyigemeirenzhu，shenshouningduanlepeixingyongdebozi。
budebushuo，kanzhetajinghuangdaomianrongniuquhaishiguaijieqide。
jiewanqilewozhizhepeixingyongxianggechidaiyiyangdehunpowenbaimeimei，「zenmeban？」
yaosharenshiyaobeitianfade，zongshipeixingyongshigegoudongxi，woyebuxiangbeitadeshengsiyinguo。
baimeimeiyifugaoshenmocedeyangzi，「dangchubaisuzhenqunanjixianwengneidaoqulelingzhicao，baibanmonan，zheicaijiuhuolebeihesidexuxian。」
「niyaowoqutoulingzhicao？」
「shuorangnitoule？xianwengdelingzhixianzaichanliangzeigao，bianyidehen。」
「......」