baiguangruliuyingxiaosan，sujinyanshoushoule。huan
tajichujielun：“gaojiqingxinpixieshu，bingmeiyouzaiqinxiaoyueshenshangfaxianzuzhou。”
zhangkaixuandiaodiaodexin，zongsuanluodaoshichu。
jingjirenxiaowangzhangzhangzui，xiangyaofanbo——danmianduidej&shigshitiancaixiushisujinyan，xiaowangyuyaobianbodehuakazaihoulongli，tarenbuzhuhuaiyiziji：nandaoxiaoyuehezhangkaishizhenxinxiangai？
“suiranwozhangdechou，danwosidixiahenwenrou。”zhangkaiannazhuneixindekuangxi，mianshangguyirourouyanjing，jusangdishuo，“woxiwangshenyunxiedaoshihesunuannimenerwei，yihoubuyaodajiaowohexiaoyueshenghuo，fouze，wohuishiyongfalvwuqi，weihuzijidequanli。”
苏暖依然不相信。
tasuiranmeiyouxiuwei，danguzilideminruiduhaizai。zhijuegaosuta，zhangkaijuebujiandan。
yinselunyiyidong，shenyunxiemanyouyoulumian：“daxiangzaishuinidililiuxiajiaoyin。youzhixiaomayiluguo，wenlingyizhimayi，zheigejiaoyinshishenme？lingyizhimayihuida，shishuikeng。duimayilaishuo，daxiangliuxiadejiaoyinshijudadeshuikeng，mayitaimiaoxiaole。”huan
众人懵逼。
直播间满屏问号。
shenyunxietankouqi，xiangshizaikanyiqunzhizhang：“nimenyuwenshitiyulaoshijiaode？wozheishiyonglebiyudexiucishoufa，shengdongxingxiangdijiangsujinyanbizuomayi，bajiqinxiaoyuexiazuzhouderenbiyuchengdaxiang。wozheishizaichaofengnimen，shumucunguang、zuojingguantian、muguangduanqian、bushidati。”
沈云斜直摇头。
这帮人语文真差。
haishiwojianuannuanzuicongming。
pangbiansunuanmeirenzhu，qingxiaochusheng。huan
shenyunxiechayidikanguolai，tehouhuimeidaishoujibasunuanweixiaodeyangzipaixialai，taikeaile！
“**shaoyinyangguaiqi！”zhangkaizijimeishawenhua，guzilizuitaoyanzheixiemainongwenhuaderen，tanuqichongchong，“nishenyunxiebuguoshimeixiuweidefeiwu！renjiasujinyanshiyijiegaoduanxiushi，ninalaidegoulianchaofengta！”
shenyunxierourouerduo，zelesheng：“shuohuazhenhaoting，zuibamolekaisailuside。”
zhangkailianzhangdetonghong：“ni！！！”
zuizhonghaishikanrenaodesujiaojiaozhanchulai，qingyanxiyuanfuzhangkai：“haole，zhangxianshengbuyaoshengqi。jiransunuanheshenyunxierenweiqinxiaoyuezhonglezhou，neitamenliangkendingyoujiechuzhouyudefangfa。”
sanyanliangyu，sujiaojiaojiangmaotouduizhunsunuan。
nisunuanjiranxiangchufengtou，neijiubawutairangjini。zaiquanwangguanzhongmianqianchoutaibilu，neishinizizuozishou。huan
zhangkaiyanzhuzizhuanlezhuan，yigedaidudeniantoumaochulai：“sunuan，shenyunxie，yaobulaidayigedu！jirannimenrenweiwojixiaoyuexialeqingzhou，wojiujinimensantianshijianzhaodaozhengju！santianhou，xiaoyueruguohaiaiwo，neijiuzhengmingwohetashizhenai！nimenlianggexiaochou，daoshihouguidiketou，jiwodaoqian！”
zhangkaiduizijihenyouxinxin。
nanchengbijingshigexiaochengshi，xuanxueyuandelaoyuanzhangbingzhong，suoyixiuweizuigaodexiushiyejinjinshierjieshuiping。jiaotashijiaqingzhoudeneirenshuoguo，zhenggenancheng，meiyourenkeyipojieqingzhou。
“nimenganbuganhewodadu？”zhangkailizhiqizhuangdao。
shenyunxiemianlunanse，yanbabawangxiangsunuan：“zheiwozuobulezhu...wodoutingwojianuannuande。”
苏暖翻白眼。
zheijiahuozongshibuzhengjing。dansunuanyanzhonghuaiyi，shenyunxiezheigoudongxishiguyizaoliangrendefeiwen。huan
“keyi，wohuizaisanrizhineichaqingqinxiaoyueshenshangdezuzhou。”sunuanyingxiazheigeduyue。tayaoxiangliuzainanchengxuanxueyuan，jiubixubazheixiezaoxinderichangrenwuwancheng。
dangzhezhibojianshuwanrendemian，sunuanhezhangkaideduyuelixia。
【wohaishizhanzaizhangkaizheibian，sunuanxiaojiejiesuiranpiaoliang，danshitahaowuxiuweia。】
【sujinyanqinzigaizhangrenzheng，lianggemeixiuweidefeiwuhaiganzhiyiquanwei？】
【woduisunuanzhendefenzhuanhei，siwujidangongjiputongnanxingdewaimao，tashibushiguziliyanenanxing？mofeishinvquan？】
【loushangshax，nengbunengbietiaoqinannvduili！jiandaogenvdejiumanvquan，**！】
【zhurenjiayou！dalianzheibangchunhuo！】huan
——yonghu：【jiuweixiaoshuaihuweizhurenjiayou】songleyijiahuojianliwu——
“sunuan，niruguohouhuile，keyisuishilaizhaowogegeqiuzhu。”sujiaojiaoqiaoqifenrunchunjiao，guanbileshoujizhibojian。
sujinyanbieyoushenyikanleyansunuan，zhuanshenlikaifangjian。
sujiaojiaokuaisugenshanggege，zoudaopijingdezoulang，sujiaojiaozheicaixiaoshengwen：“jinyangege，qinxiaoyuezhendemeiyouzhongzhouma？”
sujinyandiantou，haobuhuaiyizijidepanduan：“qinxiaoyuejingmaitongchang，hunposhenshiwanzheng，meiyouzhongxiezhongzhoudejixiang。zheisunuanheshenyunxietaiguozifu，chizaohuibazijisongshangjuelu。”
xiuzhenzhiren，zuijihuijiaoaozifu。
zaisujinyankanlai，sunuanjishiyou505dechushilinglizhi，taneifengaoaodexintai，zhudingtadexiuzhenzhilutingzhibuqian。huan
kexilezheiguogaodelinglizhi。
“jiaojiao，nixianhuiqu，gehaiyouxieshiyaochuli。”sujinyanwenshengdingzhusujiaojiaojiju，zhuanshenliqu。
sujiaojiaoqingyaohongchun，zhuanzhuanyanzhuzi，toutoubajingjirenjiaolai。
sujiaojiaoyadishengyin，jijigugufenfu：“nibajintiansunuanhezhangkaidadudeshichaozuoyixia，maixieshuijunyinfashehuiyulun。woyaorangsunuanshenbaiminglie。”
youdagedebaozheng，sujiaojiaorendingqinxiaoyuemeiyouzhongzhou。
sunuanxinsidaidu，kanbuguanmeinv+chounandezuhe，guyiwuxianzhangkai，zheishiqingyaoshidasizaiwangluoshangchuanbo，kendinghuirangsunuanchengweiguojielaoshu。
jingjirenshigecongmingdejiahuo，henkuaidayingxialai：“jiaojiaonifangxin，wozheijiuquban。”huan
sujiaojiaojueqizui，wangxiangsadaozoulangdeyangguang：“wozheiyangzuoshibushiyoudiantaieduledian？”
jingjirenrushihuida：“...shiyoudian。”
sujiaojiaohongchunweimin，qiaolianshanguoyisiwunai：“neiyemeibanfaya，yishanburongerhu，sujiabunengyoulianggeqianjin——haolenikuaiqumangba，wohaidehuixuexiaofuxigongke，jinwanhaiyaodu《xiushizhujifa》。”
benlaiyiweidangxiushihenrongyi，danzhenzhengjinrunanchengxuanxueyuanhou，sujiaojiaocaizhidaoxiuzhenzhiluyouduojiannan。jinjinshizuijichudezhujifashu，xuyaoxuexideshujijiuyoujidadui。
好难...
比高考还难...
dangxiushiyaodushu、haiyaokaoshi、haiyaohemoshousisha、haibunenghuazhuang、haiyaomeitianzaoqipaosangongli...huan
youqishineibenbixiukeben《xiushizhujifa》，juranyousanqianye！shenmepojiaocai，jurantamadeyouzuzusanqianye！haiyaoqiuxinshengbixubeisong！
sujiaojiaodouxiangkuaifangqile。
shangbeiziwafen，zheibeizixiuzhen！
dantaqingchuzhidao，zijimeiyoufangqideyudi，wushushuangyanjingdouzaidingzheta。tarouroutaiyangxue，yibuyibujiannandiwangnanchengxuanxueyuanzouqu。
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