第一章 穿越搞人两不误

diyizhangchuanyuegaorenliangbuwu

妈的!嘶!好冷!

linyuximimihuhuzhe,shenmeqingkuang?zenmeganjuehunshenshilulude?

“niyige**pizishengdeshunv,yeganwangtulaiqiangwoyaodedongxi?pingniyepeigaopanhuangzi,qiturugong?”linyuexiyishilingrendidingzhegangcongshuizhongbeilaoshanglaideren,“jintiansuanshiwozheigezuodijiedejiniyidianxiaoxiaodejiaoxun。”

suoyijiyichaneijianxishuyongrunaohai,talinyuxi,benshiershiyishijidingjiandeyixuechuanren,shouguyuguojiazhuanmenfuzejiejueyinanzaan,yichaochehuoshuaixiashanya,hunchuanchengweizheishengtianwangchaohubushangshufushuchudeliuxiaojie,yusanhuangziyouguozhifuweihundehunyue,tadedijieyinaimusanhuangzi,minglianlikemeishaoqiruzheigeweiweinuonuodeyuanzhu。

tahuranzhengkaishuangyan,zhanqishenlailenglengdidingzheyanqianderen,daizheshangweizhejugaolinxiadefushiheliangbodeshayi,ranglinyuexixindifamao、zhandoubuzhi。

“xiao**,nihaiganzheiyangdingzhewo!sheijinidedanzi?”

linyuexipingtuizuoyou,xiayishidiyinweixindiweijuerhoutuiyibu。

linyuxilengxiaoyisheng,yibushangqian,taiqishoulaijiletaxiangliangdeyibazhang,“zheibazhang,shiwohaijinide。”

shuobabianzhuanshenyaozou,tadeganjinliqingsilu,bunenghezheiyangderenqianchebuqing。

“nijiwozhanzhu!zhanzhu!”linyuexijianlidijiaohanzhe,“nigandawo!woyihuigaosufuqinmuqin,jiuyaonihaokanle!”

tafanyingguolai,kuaibuzhuileshangqu。

yankanyaozhuazhulinyuxideshihou,linyuxiyigeshanshen,tapulegekong,shuaidaozailedishang,naodaikedaoleshitouyunleguoqu。

蠢货!

linyuxidaliangzhesizhoujingqiaoqiaode,xunsuzhaohuilezijidewofang。

gangxiangzhangshuyikouqi,jiujijingditingjianlvexiancuzhongdenanzihuxishengyin。

“谁!?”

tajingtidisaoxiangsizhou,shuhuzhijianyigeheiyingzifangdingyiyueerxia,lizaitashenhou,jiangfenglideduandaohengzaitadebojingchu,“jienidedifangliaoshangyiyong,fanqingguniangbangwobajianfuyao,buran......”

nanzideweixiebuyaneryu。

made!zheishinamaochulaidesangmenxing!tazheishigangchulongtan,youruhuxue!

haishigeyoudianlimaodesangmenxing......

tabanmiqiyanjing,lengshengdao:“gongzi,nikezhizheishihechu?ruojingdongzheifushangzhiren,nijiuzhishengxialesiluyitiao!”

“hubushangshulinxingchaodefudi,”nanzilewujuse,“linjialiuguniangnidaoshiyuchuanyandangzhongcaobaoyouxiebutong,buguoyitumouhaizijidijie,chuanchuqubuzhidaolinshangshushifouhaichengrennizheigenver。”

linyuxijiantadianchulezijideshenfenhegangcaideshiqing,zhixiaobubangta,tayebiexianghaoguo,zhidetongyi。

“xing......”tayaozheyayingcheng。

jingzetongjianmudedadao,huanmanshoulebishouduanzuozaichuangtashangdiaoxineili,“wohuaizhongyoushangyao,nitiwobajianhou,jiangshenshangshoushangzhichufushangshangyaobaozhahao,tianweiliangwobianhuilikai。”

linyuxikanzhenanzixiongqiandejian,zaishencirujigongfentabisi,wozhujianyongli,“ci”deyishengjiangjianbachu,jingshisihaoxuehuaweicengfeijianchulai,kejianshoufaxianshuzhiji。

taxiangshibaofuyiyang“pa”yixiaziyonglijiangyaofenjinshufuzaixuedongbandeshangkoushang,bingchizheyigedafudezhiyesuyang,kaishiyonglidititabaozhaleqilai,tengdenanzizhixiqi。

“jianshangwudu,doushixiepiwaishang,nizheiyaonaishishanghaodejinchuangyao,yihouyirisancifuyushangkou,banyuejikequanyu。”

nanziyouxiexuruodekanzhebuqingyuandelinyuxi,gangcaitamingmingyoujihuishalezijide。

“wojiaojingzetong,duoxieni。”

turanjingzetongcubujifangfeishencongchuangshangyueqi,yibazhuaizhulinyuxitiaodaolefangliangzhishang,“xu!biechusheng!”

menwaituranduochulejigejiaobusheng,“zhuzi,shuxiaqinyankanjiantacongzheiliyiyueerxiade!bingweikandaorenchuqu,renyidinghaizaishangshufu!”

“tashoushangshenzhong,yishibankewufalikai!nimenlikequshangshufusuoyouchurukoushouzhe!bibunengrangtajipaole!”

linyuxidaqibuganchu,kanzhemianqiandenanzi,“kanlaitamenshibiyaozhuazhuni,woyijingtiniyizhi,zhiyaoshangyaojiunengquanyu,tianliangzhiqianniganjinchufu,buyaorangrenkanjian。”

jingzetongdaliangzheyanqiandeliuxiaojie,yanshenweimi,“nidaodishishei?”

“shangshufuliuxiaojielinyuxi。”

“niruozhenshita,kezuobudaowanshidouzheimelengjing。”

jiantayaoenjiangchoubao,linyuxizhengxiangzheruhetuoshen,jiutingjianjicudeqiaomenshengxiangqi,“guangguangguang!”

“liuxiaojie,furenyouqing。”

linfurenzhanzaihoumianzhishizheshouxiapozizamen。

妈的!

zheicishizhentaozhaidelaile!

linyuxijimangshiyanse,rangrenganjinzangqilai。

jingzetongshenshendikanletayiyan,zheicaiyueyuliangshangduobi。

linyuxijiandaotashangqu,zhenglileyixiayifu,zhuanshenkaimen。

“yuerjianguofuren,buzhifurenshenyeqianlai,suoweiheshi?”

“nierjiejieshoulezhongshangyundaocaixing,fuzhongyourenqiaojiannierrenyitongqulehubian,”linfurenyinchendikanzhelinyuxi,“yuerhaishihemuqinzouyitang,jiangcishifenbianqingchuba。”

linfuzhengtang,linyuexiyijingxingle,xuanranyuqidekanzhelinfushuodao:“fuqin,doushiliumeimeituiwode,wocaihuishoushang,xianzaishangdaolelian,wokezenmejiarena!”

linfukanzhemianqiandenver,xinliyouxiebuxi,“yuer,shibushini?”

“bushiwo。”linyuxiyaoyaotou,“fuqin,shiwobuxiaoxindiaojinhuzhong,erjiejiejiangwojiushanglaide。wohunshenshiluludebuchengtitong,jiuganjinhuifanghuanyifule,nverzenmeganqifuerjiejieni?”

shuoba,tayangzhuangliulei,weiqukeliandikanzhelinxingchao。

“bale!”linfuxinxiayouyunanjue,“jiemeizhijianbenjiugaiyituanheqi,daodishinierjiejieshoushang,nijiuzaifangzhongjinzusiguoba。”

“多谢父亲。”

zhongrensisan,linyuxihuifanglushang,pengshangleyilianbufendelinyuexi。

errencajianerguo,“erjiejie,lairifangzhang,niqiedengzheba。”

fangzhongjingqiaoqiaode,neiweiyangshangdedayebuzhiheshiyijingzoule,zhiliuxiayikuaiyupeifangzaitashang。

“diyamazheishi?yibaojiumingzhien?”

linyuxisuishoujiangyupeiguazailezijiyaojian,zheimezhiqiandedongxi,qiexianliuzhe。

linfuxiezailelinfurendewofang,tanxidao,“furen,wozongjuedejinrigewaibushun。”

“laoyebiefanxin,tingshuozuijinyouyiweidedaogaosengqianlailinghuasijiangjing,buruqingrenguolaikankan,yijielaoyeyoulv。”linfurenchenjishuodao。