第一章

omegayankuangfanhong,jiebianzhuizhedijingyingluzhu,yuluoweiluo。

“bieguaita,shiwobugailaide,wojiuxiangzaikannizuihouyiyan……”

guhaochenlengbingbingdiwangzhewo:“duzhizhu,woyijingdayinggennijiehunle。nimeibiyaoweinantangtang。”

谁说我要为难他。

wobutaiyouya,kuankuanshangqian,liangzhijiangzhanmanwoxinxisudemingpianfangjinomegadekoudai,qingshenzaitaerbiandiyu。

“guhaochenyoushiduogetangtang。niyaobuyaokaolvgenwo?”

“woshenbianmeiren。nifangxin,zhishaowoshiyiduiyide。”

omegazhengzhu,leizhuningzaiyankuangli。

guhaochenchenxialian,jinggaodao:“duzhizhu,tashiwoderen。”

“ok。”woshuangshoujuqizuotoujiangzhuanghoutui,xiaomimidiwangzheta,“guzongshengqingnanque,wozhihaomianweiqinandishouxiale。”

guhaochenyihuo:“shouxiashenme?”

wochaotaziya:“liangqianwan。”

guhaochenzheicaixiangqizheijianshi,yanzhongfeikuaishanguoyisiaonao。

tapaipaiomegadebei:“huiqu,worangchenshusongni。”

omegananyizhixin,jiemaoyizha,zhenzhusideleizhucongsaibiankekegunluo:“haochen……”

guhaochenbuzaikanta,yaojibengjin,daizhezhoushendiqiya,zhuanshenchaohunlihuichangneizouqu。

guhaochenyougejiaotangtangdebaiyueguang,yueguangyunluohou,tazhaoleshishugetishen,tongshi。

erwo,duzhizhu,youmeirenshoujipi,jiezhesanliaoyingdideminghao,zaiquanziligebangeyuejiuhuanchuangban,wulunshiomegahaishibeta,gaolingzhihuahaishilinjiashaonian,leixingjuebuzhongfu。

wohetashishangjingquanliyoumingdedingjizhanan,yeshisiduitou。

yuanbenwangbujianwang,zhidaoyizhihunyuecongtianerjiang。

guhaochendenainaibeichachulaihuanshangledasexingxueyebing,yishengshuotadingduozaizhichengyinianbanjiuhuixianqu。gujialaotaitaibuzhidaodacuolenagenjin,lixiayizhu,yaojiangqianyiyichanjinshuliujiwoheguhaochen,qiantishiwoliangjiehunshengzi。

shide,nimeikancuo,wogenguhaochen,lianggealpha,jiehunshengzi。

真搞笑。

danzheigexiaoxiyichuanchulai,wobajiubawoconghupenggouyoudejuhuishangzhuohuiqu,zhengzhongdigaosuwo,tamenfangrenlewoershiwunian,woxianzaixuyaoweijiazuzuochuzijidegongxian。

他替我答应了。

wosishenghuozuofengrucizaogao,zhisuoyizaiquanlitouhainenghuobengluantiao,zhiyinweiwoshidujiadeerzi,wobazhaowo。

xianzaiwobashuo,ruguowobutongyi,tayaofengshawo。

wosuoyoudexingchengdoubeiquxiao,tanhaodejiaosehuanren,zaipaidezongyituichu,liandaiyandoubeixiale。

wodejingjirenbeifapeiquouzhoudaixinxiujialiangnian,wodezhulihanleishouxialiangbaiwanqiansanfei,zhuwosannianbaoliang。

wokaichequjiubazhaowodehongyanxiaolajiaosuku,helejibeijiweijiu,fuzhangshifaxianliankadoubeidongle,haishixiaolajiaotiwojiede。

huijiadelushangwojiujiabeizhua,jinlezhianju。

wozaijusuolidaileqitian。

chulaihouwojiudixiagaoguidetoulu,tingcongfuqindeanpai,qujianleguhaochen。

guhaochendeqingkuangbingbubiwohao。

tagongsigangyudaogedaweiji,zijinturanduanlian,tajialaotaitaibujianjiehunzhengbukensaqian,tayaoshipochanjiuhuilianyangxiaobailiandebendoumeile。

yushitabanzhezhangchoulian,genwoyiqizuozaitagongsilouxiadekafeitinglimianmianxiangqu。

shangyiciwohetamianduimianshi,haizaiweilegejiaochutangdexiaoaidouzhengfenghecu。neigexiaoomegaxiangzhengmianzi,feiyaowogentasaiche,sheiyinggensheizou。

guhaochenzhuangdeshenqingkuankuan,zhenbachekailechulai。

wozhijiebatadechedianle。

xiangdaozhei,woxianghetagaishangaishanguanxi,gangduichugexiaolian,jiubeitadaduan。

“jiajiehun,yichandaoshoujiuli。hunyincunxuqihubuganshe。wohuijini50yi。”

我心想,狗东西。

“yirenyibanshibushizhishaowubaiyi?”

guhaochenxianqiyanpi:“neishigujiadeqian。”

woweixiao:“meiyouwo,jiubianchenggongyizuzhideqianle。”

“我八你二。”

“我四你六。”

“woqinisan,bunenggengduole。”

“成交。”

guhaochenlingwoqujianlelaotaitai,laotaitaibuzhizenmedefeichangxihuanwo,lazhewodeshoushangkanxiakanzuokanyoukan,haizaiwo**shangpailexia。

womeitoutiaoletiao,guhaochenxingzailehuo。

laotaitaiwenwoduizheizhuanghunshidekanfa,wobiaoshifeichangqidai。

“nei……”laotaitaiguanqiediwen,“nimenxianghaorangsheishenghaizilema?”

wogenguhaojingyikoutongsheng:“ta。”

shuowanzhengzhu,hukanyiyan。

wokanta,jianmeixingmu,zhibibochun,mianronglengjun,wuguanshensuirudaokefuzao,shijiweiyingjunqiejiweiboqingdezhangxiang。

takanwo,nanshengnvmao,yishuangtaohuamuliuzhuanshenghui,liangpianfenchunweiyuxianxiao,xiachunzhuizhekeqianzhi,zongnengliaoderenxinshenbuding。

wogenguhaojingzaiciyikoutongsheng:“ta。”

laotaitaifuzhangdaxiao,zhishuowohetayoumoqi。

zhihouhualihuawaianshiwomen,yaozhengliguowang,zhuanzhuhunyin,haohaopeiyangfufuganqing。

jiezhekaiwanxiaosidetiyi,sheishoubulewanxin,jiuyousheishenghaizi,huozhejiduifangpeifuliangqianwan。

kan,liangqianwanzheibujiulaile。

zhenggehunlixiaoomegadoumeiyouzaichuxian,danguhaochenzhongguishimeiyouwoduandeganjing,bijingtazaimeigetishenneilidouweichizheshenqingrenshe,zongrangrenjuedeyoujikecheng。

而我,确实没钱。

hunlihou,woxiangguhaochenzhuisuoliangqianwan,tamiansebuyu,danhaishimianweiqinanjiwoqianlezhangzhipiao。

genwowanzheibaxi,sheibuzhidaotagongsizijinchulewentiliangqianwanduibuchulai。

wobujieshou,aimeidikanxiangta:“yaoburanni……”

tawunai,yigedianhuabaxiaoomegajiaoguolai,wenxiaoomegajuedewozenmeyang。

xiaoomegasaowoyiyan,hanxiudaiqiedishuokeyi。

guhaochendiandiantou,duiwoshuo:“tagenni,chepingle。”

妈的,这死渣男。

合我胃口。

wochuixiayan,xinxiang,ge,zheiguaibudewole。