第3章 手撕绿茶婊

muziyingweiweiyizheng,zhuanguotoulaikandaoshiluqingyandeshihou,lianshangmianludanyou,likezoudaoluqingyandemianqianlianmangfawen:“qingyanzheiduanshijiannidouqunale?woyizhilianxibushangni,tingshuo……nifangzidoumaile,woyiweinilikaileashi,zaiyebuhuilaileni。”

tingwenzheihua,luqingyanzuijiaohuranlveguoyisibuxiedehengxiao,tashangxiadaliangzhemuziying,jiantayijiuhecongqianneiyangrourouruoruo,xinlitoujiufanqiyiguexinlai。

talengzheliankaimenjianshandeduimuziyingshuodao:“biezhuangle,nibushibabudewolikaima?wolikaiqibushishunlenideyi。”

“qingyannishuodezheishishenmehua,suiran……suiranneijianshiqingqueshishiwoduibuqini,keshiganqingdeshizhendemeiyoubanfakongzhiyemeiyoubanfayanshuo,wochengrenwozijizuocuole,woyehuijinkenengdemibuni。womenlianggezaiyiqigongshineimejiu,bicijiandoushiduifangzuiqinmidepengyou,wobuxiangjiuzheiyangshilelianxi。”muziyingmanmuyingrundebabakanzheluqingyan,lianshangmanshiweiqu,yifuchuchukeliandemoyang。

ketazheixiehua,jiugenzhenyiyangshengshengdecizailuqingyandexintoushang,tengdetafajin。

tazuanzheshouxin,nulikezhixinlitouneixiexiangzourendechongdong:“daoxianzainihaiyaoshuozheixieguanmiantanghuangdehuama?ruguonixinlizhendeyouwozheigepengyou,jiubuhuihewonanpengyouyourenheguage,gurendoushuoguo,pengyouqi,bukexi。fanguolainanpengyouyeshiyigedaoli。keshinini?”

tayinrenzhexindijijiangbaofadeqingxu,yidiandiandechaomuziyingneibiankaojin:“nibujinmanzhewotoutouheguxianzongjiaowang,haidangle**yaoligepaifang,zenme?waleguxianzonghaiyaohewozuopengyouma?woshinaozichoulehaishiren**leyaodayingni?”

muziyinghuangmangyaotou,jinjinlazhuluqingyandegebojieshi:“qingyan,zheijianshiqingshiwocuole,keshiganqingdeshiqingwozhendekongzhibule……”

“nishicuole,chuleni,guxianzongyeshiyigehaowuliangxindechusheng!”

tamenlianggeyigeshizijiaideren,yigeshizijizuihaodepengyou,jingranjiuzheiyangmanzhezijijiaowangle?luqingyandangshizhidaozheijianshiqingdeshihouhenbudeyibahuoshaoletamenliangrendefangzi,rangtamenlianggebuyaolianderenzhijiezangshenhuohai。

keshilizhigaosuta,buguantazenmezuo,shishihaishifashengle。

tashiwangtouding,yeyuanhenbuyi,chongdongzhixiabianmailejiachanlikaiashi。xiangdangchufumuyaojietachuguojuzhushi,tajiushiweileheguxianzongzaiyiqisuoyicaifangqilehejiarenyiqizou,zhishenliuzaiguoneide。

jieguoxianshihenhendeshanletayibazhang。

xiangdaozheili,taduimuziyingdeyuanhenyuelaiyueshen,ruguobushiaiyuzijihaiyouyaoshizaishen,zheilishirenlairenwangdeshiwusuo,tazaojiuduimuziyingdongshoule。

pianpianmuziyinghaishizheizhongbailianhuayiyangderen,bunengzhongtadequantaoerwangzidongshou。

suoyiluqingyanyingshengshengdeyaxiaxindideyunnuzhiyi,jiangtatuizhiyibian:“niyebuyongzaiwomianqianyifujiaxingxingdemoyang,zuolejiushizuole,woluqingyanyongyuandoubuhuiyuanliangnimen。bujinruci,woyebuhuiqingyifangguonimende。”

tayanshenyinleng,fangfoyaojiangyanqiandemuziyingsuishiwanduanyiban。muziyingyankuangfanhong,sihuyaoliuxialeilai:“qingyannibiezheiyang,wozhendebuxiwangwomendeguanxiehuachengzheimoyang,woxiangyao……”

“nixiangyaoshenme?xiangyaoheyiqianyiyang,wodangnidezhuliweinimangqianmanghou,ranhounihaoheguxianzongqinqinwowo?nixiangdedaomei!”

taxinlifanzaodehen,yuqiyeyuefadechaofengheyunnu:“wogaosunimuziying,nizijizuodezheixieshinizuihaoxinliyoudianshu,zongguishiyaohaide。”

“清研!”

muziyingturandiaoxialeyanlei,yankuanghonghongde,buzhiqingderenhaiyiweishiluqingyanqifuleta。keluqingyanzhidao,taxianglaijiushixihuanzhuangmozuoyang,neigeshihouzijihaibushibeitazheimoyangjipianle,shenzhiyiweitaneimeshanliang,neimezhaorenxihuan。

keshizhenshideta,haowudaodekeyan。

duiyumuziyingderouruotabingmeiyoubandianlianmin,faneryinzhidaotadeneixinergengjiayunnu:“chenwohaiyoulizhikezhizijimeiduinidongshou,niganjinxiaoshizaiwomianqian!”

“linxiaojienizenmele?”jiqingyandehuahaimeiyoushuowan,yigenanrencongneibianhuanghuangzhangzhangdepaoguolai,jiandaomuziyingyiliandekuxiang,xintengbuyidechouchuzhijindidaomuziyingmianqianyaoweitacashiyanlei。

kandaozheifuchangjing,luqingyanturanxiaole:“niduiguxianzongyeyonglezheiyizhaoma?suoyitagentiaogouyiyangbabadetiedaonimianqian?”

“zheiweixiaojienizaishuoshenme?niduilinxiaojiezuoleshenmeshi?”

nanrenkanluqingyanaorandemoyangyouxieshengqi,bumianzhanzaimuziyingneibianyaotitachuqi。luqingyanjiletayigexianqideyanshen,haobukeqideshuaixiayijuhua:“woduiyigeeyidangxiaosanderenzuoshenmeshiyongdezheniguanma?”

“zheiweixiaojie,zheilishilvshisuo,qingzhuyinideyanxing,niruguozheiyangxiaquwokeyigaonifeibang。”

“chenlvshisuanle,tashiwopengyou,womenzhishiqileyidianxiaomoca。”

muziyingshengyinqieqiedehenanrenshuodao,luqingyanchadianmeiyououtuchulai,shuangmuhairandesisidingzheluqingyankanleyihui,erhoujiangxindicuanshengdeyunnuyikoujitunlexiaqu,biaoqingdanrandeduiletayisheng:“nibiewurulepengyouzheigeci。”

shuowanbiandabuzhuanshen,zouhuilezhiqiandewuzi。

yuyuedelvshiyijingzaineilidenglexujiu,jiantaguolailianmangkeqidedaleyishengzhaohu:“luxiaojie。”jiqingyanpiequfangcaidebukuai,shoulianshenqinghelvshitanqilefangwudeshiqing。zhixiaoqingkuanghoulvshigandaoweinandehetashuodao:“xianzaizheigeqingkuangchufeishifangzhuziyuanzhuanmaifangzi,buranwomendoumeiyoubanfajiangfangzinahuilai。”

“meibanfama?”jiqingyanzhouqimeitou,kandaolvshizhengzhongdediantouhouxinlizhangtanleyikouqi:“neisuanle。”

nandaotayaoqushuofuneigebiantairangtamaifangzi?huozheshiyi**weisuidezuimingquweixietama?zhiqiandeshiqingyehaowuzhengju,xiangdaozhei,luqingyandunshijuedetouda,jiashangzhiqianyudaomuziyingdeshiqingrangtaxinlihenshifannao,jiudizuoxialaisikaolexujiu。

yizhidaoxiawu,tacaizaixinlixiadingjuexin。

buguanzenyang,biantaineibiantahaishixuyaoguoquyitang,bijingzijidezhongyaowujiandouzaineibian,haiyoufangzideshiqinghaimeiyoukaikou。

danshibunengxiangshangcineiyanghaowuzhunbeidejiuguoqu,zheicitalinshimailetainengtongxundelaoshoujifangzaishenshangzuibianxiededifang,bingqiehaihualedianqianzhaorengenzijiyitongqianwang,bingrangtamenzaiyuanwaidengzhe,yidanlimianchuxiantadehujiujiurangtamenguolaijiuzijihuozhebaojing。

fangziwaimianhaiyoulianggejiankong,zheishitahenqingchude。

wanshituodanghou,luqingyanguqiyongqizaicikaojinleneigebiantai。

jintianshizhoumo,buchuyiwaidehuatakendingzaijia。

tayugenzijiguolaideneisigerendaleshengzhaohu,ranhouyigerenzouxiangleyuanmenkou。gangzhunbeiqiaoxiangmenlingdeshihou,tahurankandaolebiantaideshenying。

zhijiantabuhuangbumangdelinzheyigesashuihuzaiyuanzidehuayuanlijiaoshui,chuanzheyishenqiansedejiajufu,toufaruantatadetiezaieqian,buzhidaode,haiyiweinagefujiashaoyezaizuowenrenyashizuodehuo,bieyouyifanfengwei。

keshixiangdaozhiqianbeichidoufudeshiqing,renpingzheihuamianzaimei,zailuqingyankanlaidoushibiantaideteshushihao,lingrenexin。

zaitapieyanzhishi,nanrenkandaoleta。