第3章 骗人的最高境界

“nizenmemeitixingwo,dongyongjuranxiguan****。”

“wogenbenbuzhidaotayouzheigexiguan。”

“……”

liangrenshuoshuoxiaoxiao,gounannvdechuchou,rangyayizheimeduotiandeshenlingxuan,tongkuaidechulekouqi,tapingjingdao:“dangchukuaijiehunle,suoyijiumeihetatongju,xianzaixiangxiang,suanshiyinhuodefuba。”

taraoyouxingqudehetongnanhelebeijiu,wangzheyuese,zaizhuangyuandecaopingshangmanbu,“zhenmeixiangdao,nihuitiwozhudongchutou。”

“zenmele,yiweiwoyigecaomin,butaiganheyouqianrenduoshuohua?qishiwobupa,wolianpihouzheni。”

shenlingxuanxiaolexiao,“wohuijinijiangjinde。”

“jirannijiwojiaqianle,woxiangzhidaodongyongzheijianshi,nixinlishishenmedasuan。”

“hainengshenmedasuan,jinliyingduihaoqitarendekanfa,rangtamenbuzaiduozui。”

tongnanyaoyaotou,“shuoshihua,wulunnizenmezuo,tamendouhuiduozui。”

shenlingxuanzhouqiximei:“weishenme?”

“congwomendaozheilikaishi,niyouzhuyidaogezhongyinyangguaiqideyanshenma?wogaosunitamenzenmexiangde,nixiao,tamenhuishuonizhuangde,ninanguo,tamenhuishuonihaishizaixiangqianrendongyong,nimianwubiaoqing,huishuonixinligenbenmeiwo,nihuibiwaijie,huishuonizaitaobi,yanshiwomendejiafuqiguanxi,nizhimianwaijie,youhuishuonishiqiangcheng,renxinjiushizheimecaodan,zhiyaonibeihuaiyile,nizuoshenmedouwufaduzhutamendezui。”

shenlingxuanpoweiyiwai,“neizuoshenmedoumeiyongle?”

“niyaozuode,bushijitamenkan,ershifanji,rangtamenbizui。”

“fanji……”shenlingxuanweiweizhengdayanjing,“nizheimeyishuo,wohaoxiangyexiangtongle,danxinwobadexinzangbing,wocaiweiquqiuquan,yuehuibi,tamenyuedecunjinchi,woyinggaizuode,shirangtamenbizuicaidui。”

“这才对呀。”

“nihencongmingma,wocuokannile。”

“meiguanxi,woyigelaochengquzhangdadecaogen,niyikaishiduiwoyoupianjianshizhengchangde。”

“neinizenmehuixiangdaozheimeduo。”

tongnansonglesongjian,“qiongrenchikuiduoya,jingyanjiuduole。”

shenlingxuanweiweiyixiao:“yihounibuhuiyouqiongrizile,jiejiezhaozheni。”

zheiyishengtiantiandejiejie,tongnanbeiliaodelinghunchuqiao,nianlingshangshenlingxuanshidatayisui,dantongnanhenxiangshuo,zhiyaonishifupo,nianlingbushiwenti。

zhuangyuandelingyibian,kefanglihuanhaoyifudedongyonghedushanshan,quanchengliansetieqing,wufaxiangxindangzhongzouguangshiqiaohe,zhijiequkanlejiankong。

“bukeneng,jueduibukeneng!”dongyongyaoyaqiechi,zhikandaoleshiwangdehuamian。

yinweijiankongjulijiaoyuan,fangdazhihou,genbenkanbuqingchuxijie,tongnanhetayouguowoshoudedongzuo,shuoshitachekailedongyongdekuzi,shuofaguoyulipu。

jiranmeizhengju,zhuangyuandezhurenziranbunengtiaoshi,zhinengshuotamenliangkouzijinwandaomei,lifuhekuzipengqiaochulezhiliangwenti。

kedongyongxinlibiechulehuo,“nigepizi,bieyiweiwobuzhidaonishilaochengquzhangdade。”

“laogong,nirenshinei**qingdeyanyuan?”

“burenshi,danhenkuaijiuzhidaole。”

diertianyizao,tongnanerrenyouyaomianlinxiayigeguanka,jianfumu。

hunlizhihou,liangrenfeisumiyueyizhou,zhijinmeiyouyizhengshifuqiguanxibaijianbama,zheishiduobule。

qichuanghuanhaoyifudetongnan,jianloushangdeshenlingxuanhaimeixialai,bianshangloujiaota,jieguogangzoudaobieshuerlou,faxianwoshidefangmenmeiguan,yiyanjiukanjianlenvshenxuebaideyubei,quxianyoumei,rangrenkanleliukoushui。

turandefuli,rangtongnankandaile,guoleyihuicaifaxian,shishenlingxuanmobudaohoubeidelalian,lianyiqunchuanbushang,tabuzhidaonalaidedanzi,turanshuodao:“yaowobangmangma。”

“a?”shenlingxuanheleyitiao,liandanshanguofeihong,gangadao:“bangwoyixiaba。”

yidianchaquguoqu,liangrenyiqichumenle,lushangtongnanhaixiangzheneiyipianxuebai,shenlingxuankantaneidiulehundeyangzi,youxiehaoxiao:“zenmele,nimeijiaoguonvpengyouma。”

“e……woyouguoqiannvyou。”

shenlingxuanbuxiangtizaoshangdegangale,shuohuilezhengshi:“hewobajianmian,yaojiejuetalianggexinlifudan,yishidapotaduiwomenliangdehuaiyi,rangtabuzaidanyouwo,ershirangtafangxiaduiwodekuijiu,dongyongshitajiwoxuande,taduiwoxinliyoukui。”

daoleshenjiazhuangyuanli,fuqinshenzhangshengzhengshijiandaolenvxu,tapoyouweiyan,kaimenjianshandewendao:“nver,nihewoshuoshihua,nimenliangshibushijiade。”

“ba,zenmekeneng,wohetongnanzaojiurenshile。”

“hushuo,wozenmebuzhidao。”

“tongnannizijihewobashuo。”

gaitongnanbiaoyanle,tashuodao:“xuanxuanxiaoshihoushibushihenxihuanlaochengqudeyijiashudian,jiaoshujianxiaowu,womenjiushizaineilirenshide,dagaishichuzhongba。”

zhuaquleshenlingxuancengjingdeyiduanjiyi,batamenliangdeshi**qu,bianchengleqiongxiaozihefujianvqingmeizhumadegushi。

pianrendezuigaojingjie,jiushijiangyigezhenshichandianjialiao,banzhenbanjia,tianxiawudi。

danlaozhangrenhaiwendaoleguanjian,“haizi,babashiguolairen,nimenliangxianzaideyangzixiangbuxiangyiduifuqi,wohuikanbuchuma。”

shenlingxuandengdejiushizheiju,“wocongxiaojiuzhidaoninyoumenhuzhijian,tongnanshigelaochengqudeqiongxiaozi,neishihouwobuganhetalianai,womendoumeiyongqitongpochuanghuzhi,xianzaiwomenliangcaishiganggangkaishi,bieshuoshifuqile,womenlianglianqinglvqifendoubugou。”

“刚开始……”

jingmiaodehuida,rangshenzhangshenglengleyihui,fanerxinshengkuijiu,“shibababudui……cuohenihedongyong,meixiangdaoshihaileni,zhiyaoniguodekaixin,wojiuxinlishutanle,dongyongneizazhong,wohuiquzhaota。”

talikezuodaofuqinshenbian,“ba,woxianzaihenkaixin,nibuyaozaiyoufudanle,shentizuizhongyao,dongyongdeshinijiubuyaoquxiangle。”

bafuqindexinqinganfuzhu,shiqingyesuanguoguanle。

huiqudelushang,shenlingxuanrenbuzhuwuzuixiaole,“nizheigerenzhenshisouzhuyiduo,shenmeganggangzaiyiqideqinglv,zheizhaohaizhenguanyong。”

“haishinipeihedehao,yandehezhendeyiyang。”

nvshenbailetayiyan,“nizhidaozouzhiqianwobahewoshuoleshenmema。”

“还有事?”

“tadanxinzijishentichengbuzhujinian,xiangkuaidianbaosunzi,cuizhewohedongyongjiehun,yeshiyinweizheige。”

“bao……baosunzi?”tongnanyilianmengbi,“hewojiezhongdehua……dejiaqiana。”

“nigeliumang!xiangshenmeni!”

“ai,nvshenbiedale,wobuyaoqianle,mianfeijuanxian。”

“找死!”