hongdeyixia,naohaibeijingdeyipiankongbai。
taozhiyuchadianyabuzhuhoulongdexuexing,nanyizhixin:“……nishuoshenme?”
kehaimeidengdaojiyanlijieshi,buyuanchudesunmengyaoquejianruicuicu:“yanlige,nibushidayingyaopeiwoqujibaiwobadema?womengaizoule。”
jiyanlilimatuikai,zhiliuxiayiju:“wowandianzaiqukanni。”
tamenyixingren,congcongshangchelikai。
taozhiyuzaiyicibeipaoxia,tayiweizijiyijingxiguan,kexinkoudetengquezenmeyabuzhu。
jicongconghuidaobingfang,tazhandouzhedaochuzhitengyao,ganyanxiaqu。
yaohenku,kudaoyanleichadianrenbuzhu。
zheishi,bingfangmenturanbeituikai。
shitaokuanquerfufan,shoulihaijiazheyizhixileyibandeyan。
“你来干什么?”
taozhiyufangxiayaoping,zhiqiyaozhanqilai。
tazaiyebuhuishadao,renweitazheige‘haogege’shilaiguanxinta。
gaodadenanrenzoujin,qiangrendeyanweizuanjinbiyi,jiaotanaohaiyizhencitong。
quetingduifangbieniudikaikou:“……niyekandaole,mengyaoshizhendexihuanjiyanli,nibarenrangjitaba。”
huaruliren,mengdiyoutongxiangtaozhiyu。
tengtongrangtaozhiyuyouqiwuli,tachaofengxiaolesheng:“ge,nihaijide,15suizhiqian,woshinizuitengaidemeimeima?”
陶宽沉默。
taozhiyuquejuedemeiyisijile:“wozhendebuzhidaowodaodizuocuoleshenme,shibushiwosile,nimencaihuiganxin?”
“你发什么疯?”
taokuangaoshenghechi,yangaitadenaoxiuchengnu。
“womeifafeng,zhishirunimensuoyuan,sunmengyaobushiyaowodeyiqiema?nigaosuta,gongxi,henkuaizheiyiqiedoushitadele。”
“nizheihuashenmeyisi?”
taozhiyubunaifan,shenshouzhixiangmenkou:“nidanfanyouyimiaozunzhongwo,jiubugaizaibingfangneixiyan,qingnilikai。”
taokuanlianseyizhenqingyizhenhong,daodihaishizhuanshenlikai。
taozhiyukanzhetatachufangmen,kanzhezheigeyijingzhaobuhuibandianguanaidegege,zuizhonghaishimeirenzhuhongzheyancishuo——
“ruguonengxuanze,woyidianyebuxiangdangtaozhiyu。”
taokuanjiaobuyidun,suihoulikaidegengkuai。
dengdaowaimianmeiyoushengyin,taozhiyuzaiyerenbuzhu,chongjinxishujiandakoudakououxue。
yikou,liangkou……oubujindexinsuan,tubuwandebiequ。
手机不断传来声音。
taqiangchengzhenaqishouji,shijiyanlifalaideduanxin。
neixieduanxinrutongshenjingcuoluan,yihuieryaohetafenshou,yihuieryouyaoqiutabuyaolikai。
buyongxiang,tadouzhidaoneidoushisunmengyaodeshoubi。
mingmingyijingjuedingfangqizheiduanganqing,kekanzhezheixie,naohaiqueyizhenzhenteng,xiangbeirennazhejuziyaojukai。
真的太疼了。
tazaiyezhanbuzhu,daodihunleguoqu。
hunchenjian,yebuzhidaoguoleduojiu。
dengdaotaozhiyuxinglaideshihou,faxianzijitangzailejizhengdebingchuangshang。
jutongxiangshiyaojiangtadeshenzihuohuopichengliangban。
hushixunwen:“nidejiarenni?”
taozhiyulengzhu,banxiangcaikusekaikou:“wo……meiyoujiaren。”
hushilianmindidijitayizhangzhi。
taozhiyuchengzhezuoqilai,jieguohou,yingmushi‘bingweitongzhishu’jigedazi。
yuanlaitakuaisilea,nanguaizheimetong……
danxianzai,tatongdaolianyanleidoumeiyoule。
hushidoukanbuxiaqu,burenxinquan:“yaobu,wojinidazhitongzhenba?”
“……谢谢了。”
dawanzhitongzhenhou,taozhiyuchengzheqiangbi,yibuyibuxianggepanshanlaorenzouxiangmenwai,buliao,quezaizoulangshangyujianlejiyanli。
jiyanlishouzhongnazhehenxianyandejiezhihezi,kedengtakandaotaozhiyushi,quehuangmangjiangneijiezhihezisaijinlezijikoudai。
suihoutazouguolai,xiangshenmeyemeifashengban,guanqiefuzhetaozhiyu:“niliansezenmezheimecangbai,nalibushufu?”
taozhiyutaiyankanxiangzheigezijicengjingzuiaidenanren,tayanlihaizheshuxideguanxin,ketabuzhidao,zheiguanxindaodidaibiaoshenme?
是愧疚还是爱?
“yaoshiwosile,nizhendehaihuixintengma?”
taozhiyuhualuo,jiyanlilikecumei,buzantongdao:“bieshuoqihua,kuaigenwohuiqu。”
“yijiarenyoushenmejieshidabukaide?”
taozhiyumeiyouliqizhengzha,yilubeiladaolesunmengyaobingfangwai,liangrengangyitingxia,jiutinglimiansunmengyaozaishuo——
“ma,woheyanlidehunli,zhiyujiehuilaicanjiama?”