第1章 打假老年大学(2090字)

suizherenmenshenghuoshuipingdetigao。

dajiaduishenghuowupindeyaoqiuyeyuelaiyuegao。

yudaojiamaoweiliechanpin,douhuizhijiezhaojizhejubao。

suoyizhibodajiajiemuyichanghuobao。

zheiri,lieyangdangkong,zhongwushifen。

yichumingweiwowoshandeshanjiaoxia,yiqunxingxing**derenjujizaizheili。

xinyidaizhumingzhuchirenchengbingzhunshikaiqilezhibo。

程冰,二十三岁。

yinzhangxiangtianmei,zhuanyenengliqiang,xunsuzaidazhongdeshiyeneizouhong。

jintian,chengbinghuikaiqizhibodajia。

tajiedaojubaotingshuozheiliyousuozhapianlaorenqiancaidelaoniandaxue。

chengbingmianluweixiaokanzhejingtou,sanfazhechunjiewuxiademeili。

gangyidakaizhibojian,renshujiumiaoposhiwan,yichanghuobao,dabufenshibenzhechengbingerlai。

“来了来了老婆。”

“我的心是冰的。”

“bing!!!!!!!!!”

“wobingzhenmei,shenmedouhao,jiushihaotibeizi。(shoudonghuaji)”

......

“qinaidezhibojianpengyoumen,zheilishidajiazhibodexianchang,woshizhuchirenchengbing。wopangbianzheiweishijubaoyisuolaoniandaxuededangshiren。”

chengbingkanzhezhibojiandedanmubiaomianbolanbujing,neixinquehenmanzu。miandaiweixiaolimaodeduizhezhibojiandazhaohu。

chengbingshenshouzhixiangshenbiandeyiweilaofu,jingtoujiuzhuandaolaofudemianqian,zheilaofunianjinliushizuoyou,shentiyouxietuobei,danshuodaorangtajieshaoshiqingdeshihou,talimalaijingshenle。

“zhibojiandepengyoumennimenhao,wojiaoliwen,shiqingshizheiyang,wobaqianjitianbeizheisuodaxuehuyoudenachulaitazijisanshiwandeyanglaojinjiaolexuefei,zheibushimingbaizhekanwobanianjidapianrendema。”

shuowanzheixieliwenshenzhiyandaileihua,rangzhibojiandewangyoumendoukanzaiyanli,danmudouzhaleguo。

“shia,zheizenmekenenga,kendingshigekengrendexuexiao,kanlaorenjianianjidalehaopian,jintianyidingyaopuguangzheisuoxuexiao。”

“dui,puguangneisuoxuexiao,dujuezheizhongdongxi,rangjianzheisuoxuexiaoderenquzuolao。”

“bingerjiayou,dajianizuixing。”

“zheizhongkengrenwanyizaojiugaipuguangle,doushilangxingoufeideren。

......

zhibojianneidedanmushunjianzhanjupingmu,zhibojiandereducengcengcengdixianghuojianbanwangshangzhang,liwuyigegebuyaomingdesong。

“fangxinbaqinaidezhibojianpengyoumen,shanshangjiushiwowoxianglaoniandaxue,zhiyaozheisuodaxuecunzaixujiaxingwei,womenshenweixinwengongzuozhe,juebuguxizheizhongweifaxingwei。”

chengbingmiandaiweixiaolimaodehuiyingzhezhibojiandewangyoumen。

suihouzhongrenshouchishebeiyiqi,dingzhechiliedejiaoyangxiangzheshandingganqu。

zhongrenyuezouyueshijingyi,jinrudashanganjuekongqiyuefaqingshuang,shanlinmaomi,yuyucongcong,wanrushiwaitaoyuanyiban。

banshang,zhongrenzoulebantianzhongyuzhaodaolezheisuodaxue,zheisuodaxuedeweizhijiweiyinmi,ruobushiliwenlaiguozheili,zhongrenhaizhenzhaobudaozheili。

zheisuodaxueyuankanbeiqunfenghuanraozaizhongjian,cuyongzaiyiqi,fangfohunrantiancheng。

danshizhongrenzoudaoxuexiaodamenzhishi,youshiyizhenjinge,zheisizhouwanruoxianjing,zheipianxuexiaoqueshilaojiucanpo,damenshangdexiubanqingxikejian。

wowoxianglaoniandaxueqigedazidaoshipojuyijing,zhishimingkezaiputongmubanzhishang,rangrenganjueyouxiebaoliantianwu。zheisuodaxuedeyiqiedouyuzhizhouweihuanjinggegeburu。

suihouyixingrenzoujinlezheisuoyouxieshenmidelaoniandaxue。

......

wowoxianglaoniandaxue,xiaozhangbangongshi。

yishenxinggaoshuo,meimuqingxiudeqingnianzuozaiyizhanglaojiudelaobanyishangxiezhedongxi,zhizhangshangmiansigexingmudazi“fazhanjihua”。qinlangzhengzaijihuazhexueshengmendexunliangairuhejinxing。

qinlangbenshiyimingpuputongtongdedaxuesheng,congdayikaishicongshigongyihuodong,meizhoudouqujinglaoyuanzuoyigong。

kanzhesiqichenchendeyanglaoyuan,qinlangyeshenganwunai。yebuzhidaogaizenmebangzhuzheixiechimuzhiniandelaorenmen。

zhidaomoutian,tanaohaituranchuxianleyige“xianyuan”dexitong,xitongdechuxianshirangrenmenjinruquanminxiuxiandeshidai,taxinshenjidong,neiyangdehuatajiushixiuxianshidaidekaituozhehelingdaozhea。

danshizaizheigekexuezhishangdeshidai,xitongyaoqiuqinlangdidiaofazhan,bunengbaoluzishendeyiqie,takaolvzaisanjuedingxiancongjinglaoyuandelaotoumenkaishi。

xianjianliyigexiuxiandechangdi,rangrenmendouzheiyangyigegetashangxiuxiandedaolu。

xianyuan”xitongnengrangrenmenjinruxiuxiandedaolu,renmenkeyitongguoxishoutiandiyuanqitishengjingjie。

xiuxianzhiluyouyouhenduopangxi,weiciqinlangshelixueyuanwudaliupai,“lianqi、liandan、fuzhou、zhenfa、zhanbu。”

xiuweidehuafenyeshi“lianqi、zhuji、jindan、yuanying、fenshen、heti、huaxu、fanzhen、dujie、feisheng。”shigedajingjie,meigedajingjieyoufenwei“qian、zhong、hou”sangejieduan。

yincizhiyaoyourenchenggonglianqi,xitonghuihuikuiqinlangyidingdejiangli,zheijianglibianshinenggoushengjitishengqinlangdejingjie。

qinlangzhengxiangzheruherangzheixielaorenmenkuaisujinrulianqiqi,zheiyangdehuatajiukeyidedaoxitongdejiangli,kuaisutishengjingjie。

“dongdongdong!”yizhenjicudeqiaomenshengchuanlai。

“jin!”yishengminglangyouyoulideshengyincongshineichuanchu,mendakaile,yigetoufabinbaidelaozhezoulejinlai。

“qinxiaozhang,menkoulaileyiqunren,shuoshidajiajiemuzuderen。”laozhezoudaoqinlangmianqian。

“dajiajiemuderen?zhangyi,shenmeqingkuang?”qinlangtingwanzhoulexiameitou,fangxiashouzhonggangbi。tayumendexunwenlaozhe。

“woyebuzhidaojutiqingkuang,menkoulaowangbaogaode,ninhaishiqukankanba。”zhangyiyaoleyaotouhuiying。

“zheiyanga,xingba。”qinlangyeshixiangbumingbai,taqishenzouchubangongshi。

......

zhongrenzheibiangangzoujinlexiaomen,tamenfaxianxuexiaolimianbieyouyifantiandi。

zheilimianjuranyouwuzuodalou,douyouxiebuganxiangxin,zheimelaojiudexuexiaohaiyouwuzuodalouni。

“shua”yidaocanyingzaizhongrenmianqianshanguo,zhongrensihaomeiyouchajue,danshizhibojianquezhenjingle。

“**,wohaoxiangkandaoyigetizheshuitongdelaotoushanguo。”

“youma?wozameikandao,zainazaina?”

“zhendeyoua!wowowo...nawozhangmuniangdexingmingdanbao(shoudonghuaji)”

“si,qianmiandeneigezheimehenzhangmuniangdema?buguowoyekandaolehaoxiangqueshishigelaotou。”

......

zhongrenhaizaiguanchaxuexiao,zhibojiandedanmuyoushuashuashuadeduoleqilai,chengbingzhuantoujiukandaolezhibojiandexianzhuang。

taqingpiedaimei,shenmelaotou?shenmecanying?taxiayishiniutouhuangusizhou,bingmeiyoufaxianshenme。