第3章

我妈不爱洗澡,

也不收拾家里。

zhinvcongchushengkaishijiuyizhihewomashui。

我每次放假回家,

quanshendoubeitiaozaoheshiziyaodemanshendoushibao。

woduociquanshuowomayaoqinxizao,

danwomaquejuedewoxianqita,guyitiaomaobing。

duiyuwozheinver,womadaxinlijuedewoshigepeiqianhuo。

suoyizheimeduonianduiwoyeshifeidajima。

taxinlizhiyoutaneigebaobeierzi。

和上一世一样。

womaningkaididiweidepinggaihou,anzhuzhinvdetoujiuzhijiewangshangdao。

wotoutouzaiyipangdakaishoujiluxiang。

倒完敌敌畏后,

womalimanazhebaoxianmobazhinvdetoubaoleqilai。

wobaluzhihaodeshipinfajilesaozi,bingshuodao:

“saoziniganjinhuilai,womayongdidiweijixiaozhinvzaixitou,wozenmequanwomadoubuting!”

saozilimahuilewoyiju:

“silaotaipo,xianghaisiwohaizi。”

bianqingjiaconggongsiganlehuilai。

kanzhezhinvzhujianfazidezuichun,

woyayizhuleneixinxiangyaoda120dechongdong:

【xiaoyu,duibuqi,bushigugubuxiangjiuni,shinibamataikehenle,guguyongyuanwangbuleliusuanfushishiguandetongku。zheibeizigugushilaibaochoude,suoyiguanbulenile!】

bangexiaoshihou,saozizhongyuhuijiale。

takanzheyijingzuichunfazidexiaoyu,

yibianfengkuangdisichezhetatoushangdebaoxianmo,yibianxiesidilididashengjiaozhe:

“haibuganjinda120!”

wokanlewomayiyan,jiazhuangbugandongdeyangzi。

womaqueyifuwusuoweidetaidu,chaofengdao:

“dashenme120,zheiduodadianshia,dengshawanshizi,ziranjiuhuihaode,nibiedajingxiaoguaiyifumeijianguoshimiandeyangzi。”

saoziqifengle,naqishoujizhijiebaojing:

“wei,110me?zheiliyourenxiadu,moushazijideqinsunnv!”

womajianzhuanglianmangchongshangquqiangsaozishouji,bingdashengmadao:

“nizheigejiannvren,buyaoxuekoupenrena,wozenmehuihaizijiqinsunnv?”

cishizhinvturankaishichouchuqilaile,shenzhikoutubaimo。

saozizhijiepushangqu,shanlewomayigedazuibazi,jiubashoujiqiangguolaidale120。

womazhijiesapodaozaidishangdagun:

“tianliburonga,womenjialufeijingranqulezheimegexifu,jingrandazijidepopo,dajiakuailaikankana!”

yishijian,zhouweisuoyourendouweileshanglai,duisaozizhizhidiandian。

henkuai,jingchahejiuhuchedoulaile。

saozibaozhezhinvyaoshangjiuhuche,womaquebaozhesaozideshoubukenfangshou:

“wogaosunimen,zheishiwolaolujiadezhong,nimenyaoshibawosunnvnongdaoyiyuanqu,youshenmesanzhangliangduan,woyidingyaonimenhaokan!”

saozijideyijiaochuaikailewoma。

这下可好。

womazhijiechongdaolejiuhuchedeqianmian,

sihuolanzheburangkaizou:“wosunnvmeiyoubing,nimenpingshenmelazouta?”

zuihouhaishijingchazaipangbianqiangxinganzhulewoma,

救护车才得以离开。

womaneisapodeyangzi,zhenshirangrentanweiguanzhia。