第1章 相亲带妈,有病

shennianniankuaiyaobeijialicuihuncuifengle。

jiulianyuanzaiwaidigongzuodoudebeiniantaodequxiangqin。

jushuoshitamademeimei,yejiushitaxiaoyideguinvdelaogongjianeibiandecunshangderen。

zhenghaohetazaiyigechengshi,yushijiubeianpaishangle。

zuozaishenniannianduimiandenanren,yifudoushibailingdemoyang,daizheyifuxibianheikuangyanjing,kanqilaisiwendehen。

jingkuanghoudeyanjing,zaidaliangduimiandeshenniannian,suihoumanyidedianlediantou。

“woduinihenmanyi,benrenhezhaopianchabiebuda,zhangdeyehenfuhewoduiweilaiyibandexiangxiang,nianlinghewochabuduo,neimewomenyihouyebuhuiyoushenmedaigou。”

budengshennianniankaikou,yanjingnanjixuzixinkaikou。

“wodetiaojian,nibiaojieyinggaigennishuoleba!”

“birenzaishenchengdiyiqiyefushijituangongzuo,muqianzaiguanliceng。”

“zaishenchengyouyitaofenqifukuandefangzi,danshiwoxiangniyinggaibuxiangbeirenshuoshituwodefangziba?suoyihunhouwomenxuyaogongtonghaidai。”

“lingwai,womenjiehunhou,jingjiaazhi,wobuxihuanbeirenguanshu。”

“woyouyiliangche,quankuanmaide,ruguowomenjiehun,nixuyaopeijiayiliangquankuandebudiyusanshiwandeche!”

“haiyou,womenjiehunhou,wobamaneibianyeshiyaogenwomenyiqizhude,bijingwobamayangwozheimedaburongyi,niyaohaohaosihoutamen,yihoutamenyeshinidebama!”

“jirandoushuohunhoule。”

“nifangxin,wobuhuikuidaini,dengnigenwoshengleerzi,wojiuzaifangchanzhengshangjianidemingzi!”

“danshiqiantibixushierzi!nversuiranyehenkeai,keshiwomenjiazhiyouwoyigedumiao,xuyaoxianshengyigeerzichuanzongjiedai。”

shennianniankanxiangduimiandeyanjingnan,daodishinalaideqipa?

“nijiashiyouhuangweixuyaojichengma?”

“shenme?”yanjingnanyileng,suihounaonudekanxiangshenniannian:“nizenmezheimebahu,wuzhi,xurong!wozheigerenconglaibuzhongnanqingnv,woshouguogaodengjiaoyu!”

“e!”shennianniannaqizhuozishangdekafei,minleyikou:“womeikanshangni!”

“ni!”yanjingnandunshizhanleqilai:“nishuawo!”

nuqichongchong,shengyinyoudianda。

haibudengshenniannianhuiying,linzuodeyigeyuemowuliushizuoyoudenvrenchongleshanglai,duizheshenniannianjiushiyizhenshuchu。

“niyiweinihaishixiaoguniang,henduorenpaiduizhuizhedeneizhonga!”

“zaiwomenneibian,nizheijiushilaoguniang,jibendoushimeirenyaode!”

“woerzikenlaigennixiangqin,yijingshijizulenimianzi!”

“yaobushikanzainineigeqinqidefenshang,niyiweiwoerziyuanyilaia!”

“jiusuankanbushang,neiyeshianerkanbushangni!”

shenniannianwuyudekanzheneiduimuzi:“nimenyuemoshiyoushenmedabingba!”

zheibiandedongjingbuxiao,youqishiyanjingnandemuqin,gengshisangmendadegencuntouneigedalabayiyang。

“nigexiaoniangmen,saolisaoqi,nicaiyoubing,runzi,zheizhongnvrenbunengyao!nanguaijiabuchuqu!”

furenmamalieliedeyichuandezanghuabiaochulai,qiebudaizhongyang,fangyanjiazheguanhua。

kafeitinglilaideduoshiyixienianqingren,duiyufangyanjiaputonghuayouxietingdeyizhibanjie。

shennianniannengtingdedong,mianseyebushihenhaokan。

danshidangchangmoleliangenneigelaonvrenduima,tayeganbuchulai。

yushishunshoujiuchaoqilekafeipodaoleyanjingnandelianshang:“guanhaonima!”

“zhangrunshiba!wogaosuni,womenzhishizaichucilejiedexiangqinjieduan,muqiankanlai,bingbuheshi!”

gangjinmendeyigenanren,muguangdunzaileshennianniandeshenshang!