第一章高端相亲
buzhibujuewoyijingchengweidalingqingnian，mianduifumudecuihun，bude**suogedaxiangqinju，mouyitianwoyudaoleyigeqipanv，tashenhuailiujialaixiangqin，haiyaoqiunanfangchubashiwancaili，jiuzaisuoyourendouchizhiyibideshihou，woqueyiranbataquhuijia，bingchengnuohuizhaogutamenmuziyishengyishi，raner，dengdaotashengchandeneiyitianwanshang，woqueguyixiaoshile......
wozhengkaiyanjing，kanjianshoujishangdeweijiedianhua，buyoudekuxiaoyisheng。
jintianshizhoumo，haoburongyishuigelanjue。
jieguodiemadaleshijigedianhuaguolai，haiyoushangbaitiaoweiduxinxi。
buyongkandouzhidao，kendingjiushitamendexiangqindianhuagenduanxin。
“cuicuicuicui，jiuzhidaocui，laozicaibuxiangjiehunni！”
我暗骂一声。
huasuiruci，danshibiaomiangongfuhaishiyaozuodao。
jiranshidiemaanpaidexiangqinhui，wozongyaoguoquzougeguochangcaixing。
woxishuwanbihou，laomadedianhuayoudaguolaile。
“ma，nifanbufana，doudajishigedianhuale。”
我打了个哈欠说道。
“erzi，wojinibaomingleyigegaoduanxiangqinhui，limiankedoushimingyuanbailing，didianzaiweiyenajiudiandatang，niganjinguoqu，qianwanbiechidao，jidechuanshangzuiguideanima。”
laomazaidianhuaneitouxingfenzhufudao。
“知道了，妈。”
我懒洋洋说道。
qishiwogenbenbuxiangquxiangqin，keshijialirentiantiancuihun，wunaizhixiazhinengquyingfuyixia。
rujindeshehuiyalineimeda，wocaibuxiangjiehun，bijingjiehunzhihouyaomianduidewentitaiduole。
woshenbianneixiejielehunderen，yigegeriziguodefeichangkubi。
youdeshenzhibudaosangeyuejiunaolihunle，zongzhijifeigoutiao，yiyannanjin。
yinciwosuiranmeiyoujiehun，danshiwoduihunyinshiyoukongjude。
wojuede，yigerenguoqishitinghaode。
buguo，fumuzhimingnanwei。
wochuanhaoyifuzhihou，xunsuqianwangweiyenajiudian。
laidaoxianchangzhihou，wochushishenfenzheng，suihoushunlijinrujiudiandatang。
guoranbukuishigaoduanxiangqinhui。
zheilibuzhidefeichangshehua，xuduojunnanmeinvchuansuoqizhong，lingrenjingtan。
“zheixierenkezhenyouqiana，yichangxiangqinhuiyaoliangwanbaomingfeidoushedelaicanjia。”
“duia，ruguoshiwoerzidehua，gujiliangbaidoubuyuanyitao。”
“renjiayouqian，meibanfa。”
wotingjianjigegongzuorenyuandishengyilun。
xiangdaowolaomajingranjiaoleliangwanbaomingfei，wodunshijiuyouxiebengbuzhule。
这也太离谱了吧？
tayaoshizaodiangenwoshuobaomingfeineimeguidehua，wokendingbuhuirangtajiaoqiande。
bijingwolaizheilixiangqin，qishijiushizouguochang，shunbianchiyidunfan，henmingxianliangwanzhichutaiguile！
buguo，laomayijingjiaoqianle，woyemeiyoushenmebanfa。
erduiwojialaishuo，qishiliangwanyezhishijiuniuyimao。
zhishi，wojuedezheiyibimaimaihenbuhuasuan。
xiangqindahuilidenannvyekaishidashanqilai。
buguowomeishenmexingqu，zhishizuozhechilingshi。
fanzhengdoujiaoqianle，buhuibenzenmexing？
jiuzaizheigeshihou，wotingjianjinghushengchuanlai。
“wokao，zheishizenmehuishi？yunfuyelaixiangqin？”
“madan，woshibushikanhuayanle？”
“太离谱了吧！”
“zheigenvdezenmehuishia？！”