你娘！
tingzhehoumianneihouziwendehua，sunxiaokongyoudianrenbuzhuxiangyaoshenshoupaisita。
那里来的奇葩，靠！
sunxiaokongyiliandantengdekanzhonghouzi，yaoleyaotoudao：“nimenbiewenwole，wocaigangchusheng，shenmedoubuzhidaoa。”
yizhonghouzimenyoukaishibababalebantian，zhibuguosunxiaokongyijumeiyoudalitamen。
kanzhesunxiaokongbantianbuhuihua，zhonghounaonaodaiyouxieyihuo，jiuwangxiayemeiwenle，paozhewanqule。
anjingxialaihoudesunxiaokongzaihebiandeyikuaishitoushangzuoxia。
花果山？
美猴王？
齐天大圣？
sunxiaokongxiangzhezheixie，kaishikaolvleqilai。
yuanzhuli，sihuhouzijiechudaozheigehouqunhou，shiyigelaohoutiyiyaoqushangliuzhaoshuiyuandeyuantou。
youtiyisheitiaojinshuiliandong，rangsheizuodawang。
zuihouhouzitiaojinleshuiliandong，caizuodemeihouwang。
……
“啊呀！”
“这河水好甜啊！”
sikaoleyihuidesunxiaokong，turanyilianjingtandehandao。
纳尼？
yiqunhouzimentingdaosunxiaokongdehua，yilianmimang。
“nibushizuozhemeihema？”
“nizenmezhidaozheishuitian？”
我尼玛！
sunxiaokonglianseyiga，youxiedanteng，jiutemebiezhuyizheimeduoxijielehaoma？
xiangzhe，sunxiaokongsuiranmeihe，haishidandingdehuchedao：“wozhiqianheguole，zheiheshuihentianhenhao。”
“ganlieqingtian，youruqiongjiangyulu。”
“xiaoheliushuihualala…”
shuozhehua，sunxiaokongyizhidingzheyigelaohou，xindao：“wotemedoutixingdezheimemingxianle，nizabujiejuqinga？”
zhonghouziyilianqiguaidekanzhesunxiaokong，tamenxiangbumingbai，bujiushiheshuima？
haichechulaizheixieluanqibazaode。
buyuanchuxiexidelaohougengyihuo，nishuozheiheshui，yizhikanzhe**ma？
nanbuchengduifangfaxianzijizaishuilitoutousaniaole？
kanzhelaohouyebujiehua，sunxiaokongzouguoquwendao：“daye，nibuzhunbeishuodianshenmema？”
“说什么？”
laohougengmengbile，gaobumingbaisunxiaokongshayisi。
sunxiaokongnaonaotou，ganjueyouxieyateng，youyulexiaxindao：“jiranniyabujiexi，jiubieguaiwoqiangxile。”
sunxiaokongkaikoutiyidao：“zheigushuibuzhishineilideshui。womenjinriganxianwushi，shunjianbianwangshangliutou，xunkanyuanliushuaziquye！”
yiqunhouzimentingzhesunxiaokongdehua，lengleyixia，suihoukaishirangrangdao。
“好啊！好啊！”
“xianzhemeishi，womenqushuashua！”
“dui，qushuashuayehao。”
kanzhezijibajuqingtuidongleqilai，sunxiaokongyeshikaixindexiaole。
“neihao，zanmenjiuyiqixunzheshuiyuanshangqu。”
shuozhehua，sunxiaokongdaitoulingzheyiqunhouzaizimenchaozheshangliupaoqu。
yibianzouzhe，sunxiaokongyibiankaolvzhe，zheibomeihouwangzhijielaiyibotaolujiuwanchengle。
shunzheheliuzouledabantian，zhongrenzhongyutingxiajiaobu。
zhidaoheliuyuanliuzhichu，zhijianyigupubufeiquan。
yipaibaihongqi，qianxunxuelangfei。haifengchuibuduan，jiangyuezhaohaiyi。lengqifenqingzhang，yuliuruncuiwei。chanyuanmingpubu，zhensigualianwei。
laohoujiancipaishouchengyangdao：“haoshui！haoshui！yuanlaicichuyuantongshanjiaozhixia，zhijiedahaizhibo。”
sunxiaokongdenglaohoushuowan，ranhouhoukanzhelaohou。
老猴：？？？
denglebantian，sunxiaokongyemeiyoujianlaohouzaishuoshenme，erqitahouzimen，yedoukanzhemeiyoushuoshenmedeyisi，sunxiaokongzaicikaishiqiangxi。
“yi！nimenkanneipubuhoumianyouyigedong，xiangbikendinglimiankendingshiyichufudi。”
“neiyigeyoubenshide，zuanjinquxungeyuantouchulaibushangshentizhe，wodengjibaitaweiwang。”
zhonghoutingzhesunxiaokongdehua，douzaixinlimuceleyixiashuiliandongyudimiandegaodu，yizhenzhuaernaosaidao。
“zheimegao，sheinengtiaoshangqu。”
“jiushijiushi，zheiyetaiweixianle。”
“sheiyaoshizhennengshangqu，womenjiuyuanyibaitaweiwang。”
孙小空一阵蛋疼。
zijizheixidaoshiqiangzule，zhibuguo，zheiqunhoumeiyigeyoushangjinxin，yumaoxianjingshende。
zheijiugangale，zijidebangbangtamen。
xianglexiangsunxiaokongtuihoujibudao：“wolai！wolai！”
yitingsunxiaokongdehua，zhonghoudouzhenjingle。
“你能跳上去？”
“nixingbuxinga，bieshuaixialaishuaisile。”
“dui，haishibuyaomaoxianle，womenhaidewakengmaini…”
sunxiaokongyebulitamenzhuangzuoyigeqibuyaochongdezishi。
xianzaidesunxiaokong，suiranhaimeixiulian，danshihuangguzhizuntiyichushijiushixianrenzhiti。
jinguanmeiyoufalikeyiyunyong，danshiyishenliliang，neiyebushikaiwanxiaode。
jiuzheishuiliandong，sunxiaokongjuedezijidanzhijiao，jiunengtiaoshangqu。
毛毛雨啦！
zhijiansunxiaokongzuozuzhunbeihou，shentigongqi，mengdejiuchaozheqianfangchongqu。
yiqunhouzimenyedoumubuzhuanjingdekanzhesunxiaokong，tamenduiyuzheigehouzibulejie，danshiyeganjuesunxiaokongtiaobushangqu。
sunxiaokongyichongjibuhou，turan！
zailinjinlaohoushenpangshi，sunxiaokongyigejiashuaizhuangxianglaohou。
yiqunhouzimenjianci，yedouwuzheyanjingburenzhishi，paozheimekuai，shuaiyixiayetingtengdeba！
laohoujiansunxiaokongchaozhezijizhuanglai，xinlihuangdeyibi，“nibuyaoguolaia！”
“wumingxiuyi！”laohouganjuezijiduobukaihou，yeshijuewangle，bijingzheimedanianjile，beizhuangyixia，jibenshangshiliangtoule。
neicengxiang，sunxiaokongnalishiyaozhuangta，ershibangta。
jiuzaizhuangdaolaohouneiyike，sunxiaokongshuangshoupengdaolaohoushi，yigeyonglizhijiejiubalaohouchaozheshuiliandongdongkouxianqu。
bijingxitongderenwushifantaolu，zijiwanchengzheigehaibujiandan，zhijiezhaogegongjuren，ebugongjuhouyidingtihouwangzhiweijiuokle。
天衣无缝。
嘭！
孙小空摔着地上。
嗖！
laohoumomingqimiaojiudefeileqilai，zhijieduijinleshuiliandongli。
众猴当场就二B了。
“？？？”
“我了个擦？”
“这是什么操作？”
“zenmehuizheiyang，zheigedaoshishenmegeqingkuang？”
yiqunhouzimenweileguolai，qizhongzhiqianjixiangjiaodeneilinghoubasunxiaokongfuqilai。
haikaikouguanxindao：“nimeishiba？”
“好气哦！”
sunxiaokongzhuangzuoyiliannanshou，tongshihouwangzhiweidekanzheshuiliandongdongkouchushuodao。
shuiliandongdongkou，laohoucongdishangpaqilai，yilianmengbi“woshishei？”
“我在哪？”
“我…什么情况？”
laohoushizhentemeerble，zuomengdoumeiyouxiangguo，zijiyouyitianhuiyizheizhongfangshi…chengweizheiqunhouzidehouwang？
buzhishilaohouxiangbutong，yizhonghouzimenyenamena，zheiyizhuang，juranhainengjizhuangdaoneimegaodedongliqu？
这特么不科学啊！