小帅揉眼。
小帅睁眼。
xiaoshuaidengdaleyanzhuzi......
gangkaishi，diannaoshangzhishimaochulebaisedemaoyan，xiaoshuaibingbuzaiyi。
zaihoulai，gaogaodemaozigouqilexiaoshuaibingbushihenhaodejiyi。
zheishijie，yeshiliuchuanzheheibaiwuchangdechuanshuo。
xiangchuan，difuzhongyouzheshidayinshuai，jiangshuaideshuai，bushishuaigedeshuai。
shidayinshuaizhongzuiweichumingde，jiushibaiwuchangheheiwuchangzheiyiduicp。
suirandajiadouduibaiwuchangheheiwuchangzuoweifanrenshidegushidajiazanyu，danshidajiayedouzhidao，heibaiwuchang——
拘魂索命呀！
daoxianzai，diannaoshangchuxiandecanbaicanbaiderenlian，zhangzhangdehongseshetou，xiaoshuaizhenggerendoudouleqilai。
baiwuchang.......
这是白无常啊！
buguobaiwuchangdemaozizenmeshi“xiaolaodi，niyelaile”？
baiwuchangshijuedezheiyangyoumoma？
啪！
xiaoshuaijilezijiyibazhang，rangzijirenqingxianshi。
yanqiandeshibaiwuchang，zijizenmenenghaixiangzheyoudemeide？
zaibuxiangbanfa，zijijiumeilea！
“baiwuchang......daren，woshangyoulao，xiayouxiao，wodelaopoxianzaizaijiazhaoguhaizihelaoren，yijiarendoukaozhewodegongziweixizheshenghuo，woshijialidedingliangzhua，wobunengsia！”
“wopingshideshihoudouhenaixizijideshentide，nikannikan，wodebaowenbeilimianhaiyougouqini！”
yibianshuozhe，xiaoshuaiyibianzhanweiweidizhixianglezijidebeizi。
该死的！
杯子里面是满的。
枸杞都泡发了。
zheigouqishui，congzuotianzaoshangpaoqilaidaoxianzaiciridelingchen，xiaoshuaijiumeiheguoyikou。
buheshuideliyouhenjiandan……
pashangcesuocishutaiduo，danwugongzuojindu。
kanbaiwuchangdemuguangtouxiangshuibei，xiaoshuaiganmangduanqishuibei，kuangkuangkuangdiwangzuibalimianguanshui，shuihegouqishenchu，yemeiyouchajue。
tadeleishui，yehunzaiqizhong。
zaitadeyanzhong，mianqianchuxiandebaiwuchang，gaogaojuqilekusangbang，chongzhetadenaodaiyidian。
不！！！！！
......
【baiwuchangfenshenlaidaoleyimingjiabanzumianqian，shangletadeshen，jiquqifendoujingshendetongshi，wanchengletajinrifendegongzuo，haoshi10fenzhong】
【baiwuchangfenshenlaidaoleyimingjiabanzumianqian，shangletadeshen，jiquqifendoujingshendetongshi，wanchengletajinrifendegongzuo，haoshi8fenzhong】
【baiwuchangfenshen......】
jiabanshujuranshibangbierenjiabandeyisia？
kanzheyanqianshibushishanchuderizhi，linhaojuedezijizheige“wuchangjiabanshu”kenengshibushi“yinshuxing”de，ershi“gongyishuxing”de。
zheigeshufa，linhaojueduibuhuizaishiyongdiercile，yidianyongdoumeiyou。
muqiankanlai，baiwuchangfenshenyishibanhuiyebuhuihuilai，shuijueshuijue。
ciri，linhaoliudianzhengyan，yanqianchuxianleyichuande——
【baiwuchangfenshenlaidaoleyimingjiabanzumianqian......】
【baiwuchangfenshenlaidaoleyimingjiabanzumianqian......】
【baiwuchangfenshen......】
zailinhaoliudianbanxishushi，yanqianyechuxianleliangtiaobaiwuchangfenshendexintishi。
zailinhaoqidianzuogongjiaoqugongsidelushang，yanqianchuxianleluluxuxubaiwuchangfenshendexintishi。
zheibaiwuchangdehuodong，gaodeheliulangqingwayiyang......
kanzhechechuangwaidefengjing，linhaojuedezheizuochengshideyunzhuan，zhendeshirangrenganjuetaileile。
juranyourenjiabandaoqidianduodea。
laidaogongsi，linhaojingshenbaomandiduiyitiandegongzuojinxingletuotiedianpai，henkuaijiutourudaolegongzuodangzhong，dangbadianbandeshihou，linhaoxinyousuogan，taiqitou，baiwuchangfenshenchuxianzailebangongshinei。
yishijian，bangongshineisuoyourendoukandaoleta，gongsinei，xiangshianxiadejingyinjian。
baiwuchangfenshendingzhe“xiaolaodi，niyelaile”demaozi，chongzhekanxiangzijidezhongrenkuxiaozhediantouzhiyi，henyoulimao！
没人敢还礼。
buguohenkuai，baiwuchangfenshenshenhouchuxianleneiheisekongbudexuanwo，yidianyouyidianjiangqitunshi。
zaibaiwuchangfenshenchedixiaoshishi，linhaodeyanqianshanguoxinderizhi——
【baiwuchangfenshenciciwanchengle107mingjiabanzudegongzuo，jiqutamendefendoujingshen，jingshenlijingguobaiwuchangfenshendecuilian，fanbuzhong......】
【fanbuzhong......】
【fanbuzhong......】
linhaoganjuezijidemeixinyangyangde，yuanbenjiushichongpeidejingligengweibaoman，zaidaodamougelinjiezhishi，sihuyou“bo”deyisheng，yanqiandeshijiegengweiqingminghelingdongle。
linhaofuzhixinlingdibishangyan，xinnianyidong，tanengqingxidiganjuedaozhouzaoyimi360duwusijiaodequanjing......
就是......
有点晕。
【linhaodiyicishiyongwuchangjiabanshu，jingshenlihuodelexianzhudetisheng，ningjuleshennian】
【shennianqiangdudadaolelianqiqisiceng，zheikeshilianqizhongqixiushicainengzhangwodeliliang！】
【xiuxianjierenrendouzhidao，jingshenlilianggaoyubenshendexiuxingdengji，keyijidajiangdizouhuorumodefengxian，bingqieyeyouzhuyugongfadexiuxing】
【sheinengxiangdaozhangmenchuanfade“wuchangjiabanshu”shijingshenliliangdexiuxingfamen，zhangmenzheishibazongmenyaxiangdidegongfachuanjileta】
【linhaowanfenxinxi！！！】
zheiganjue，zhendetaibangle，yihoumeitiandouyaoshiyongwuchangjiabanshu！
yaobangzhuneixiejiabanderenmen！
chengxianzuozu，jiukanjinchao！
helinhaodexinxibutong，gongsineikandaobaiwuchangdetongshimen，neikeshishoudaoleshizudejinghe！
dabaitiandajiakandaoleshenme？
neizhuangzao，neituranchuxianyouturanxiaoshideyangzi！
那是......
鬼啊！！！！
“啊！”
“见鬼了见鬼了！”
“yaosile，woyaoqutijian！”
“......”
gongsiyixiaziluanhonghongqilai，dajiajinqingshifangzhezijidekongju，danyoumeirenganduzilikai。
renduo，zongbirenshaohaoba！
kanzhedajiahaipadeyangzi，linhaoye“a”leqilai~
wohaohaipaa，haohaipaa，ganggangbaiwuchangjiuliwoneimejin，hesilehesilehesilehesile......
tongshimenhaipazhehaipazhe，dajiajiukaishitaolunqibaiwuchangchuxiandeyuanyin，ranhou，huatishunlichengzhangdizhuandaole——
体检！
henkuai，renshijinglijiushoudaolegongsiquanbuyuangongdeqingjiashenqing，dajiaganggangzaiwangshangtuangouleyifenquanshentijiandetaocan！
gongzuozhongyao，danshenti，yehenzhongyaoa。
yiqianbuzaiyi，dankandaobaiwuchanghou，sheiyounengduizijideshentizhizhibulini？
baiwuchangzongbukenengwuyuanwuguchuxianba？
renshijinglishoudaodajiaqingjiashenqingdetongshi，lanzhulezhunbeiyiqizoudeyuangongmen。
“nimendengyidenga，wo……woyehenimenyiqiqu。”
shuozhe，renshijinglizijiyexieleyifen《shenqingshu》。
“zunjingdelaoban（huadiao）
尊敬的姐夫：
wojintianzaibangongshilikandaolebaiwuchang，shizhendebaiwuchang，henduorendoukandaole，dajiadoushangbuxiabanle，woyaohedajiayiqiqutijianle，nimeitiangongzuoneimexinku，heneimeduodejiu，yeyaozhaoguhaozijideshentiha。”
xiehaohou，paizhaofajilelaoban，renshijingliyelikaile。
likaigongsidedajia，doubuganluodanlikairenqun。
napayouche，yeyaoyiqizuogongjiaoquyiyuan。
……
daoleyiyuan，dajiazaipaiduitijiandeshihou，tingdaole——
“nipengdaobaiwuchangle？”
“你也是？”
“baiwuchangdarenshihaorenduiba！”
“shiashia，gangkaishideshihouwohaibeiheleyitiaoni！”
“duia，baiwuchangdarenkeshihaoren，tabangwotiqianwanchenglegongzuo！”
“shideshide，baiwuchangdarenyyds。”
“......”
zairenqunreliedetaolunzhong，youyiqunshenzhechengguanzhifudegongzuorenyuanzaixunwenzheshenme。
qizhongdeyixiechengguan，linhaohaiyoudianmianshuni。
kebushizainaichadianmenkouyibianweichizhixu、yibianhezhezijizuodenaichadechengguandarenme？
duiyuchengguandewenxun，beixunwenrengangkaishidouhuiyouyixiekangju，danshichengguanmendouhuirenzhendishuo——
“chengshiguanlishiwomendezhizea，buguanbaiwuchangshizhenshijia，douyijingyingxiangdaolezheigechengshidezhixu，budeburangwomenhuaiyi......
nimenkouzhongsuoweidebaiwuchang......
shibushidaiyanleyiyuandetijiantaocan。”
linhao：wobushi，womeiyou，zheishiqinghewoyikuailingshideguanxidoumeiyou！
eryouyixieyuanlirenqundechengguan，zeshizaidishengyilunzhe：
“shifubenruqinxianshileme？”
“yeyoukenengshidexinjuexingdeyinengzhe。”
“zongbunengshichengwaideneixie……”
“douanjingdian，zheishizaiwaimian，gongkaichanghebietaolunchaofanliliang。”
话头，戛然而止。
shuoa，nimenweishabushuoya！
shililianqiyiceng、ganggangningjuleshennian、wuganminruidelinhaozhengtingdeqijingni！