第3章 张凡老张王龙殡葬老板来生意了

“ok,xieyiqianhaole,shangleitai!”

“bieji,woxiankaigejingcai。”

wanglongyijingzhanzaileitaishangzhengzhuangdaifa,laozhangqueshibuhuangbumangdejiahaoshouji,bingqiefaqileyilunjingcaiyouxi。

“xiongdimen,zhichilaozhangdedianzuobian,qitarenjiwogunchuzhibojian!”

“daojishisanfenzhong,jiwozuobianlaman!”

“xiongdimen,youxiajiaoxiaofengcheyouyikuanzhenrenmonigedouyouxi,dianjiyouxiajiaolianjiecanyuhuodong,lingqulaozhangfensizhuanshufuli!”

“wozaijidajiafagefudai,xiongdimen,zuobian,la~man!”

“……”

jingcaikaiqi,zhibojianshuiyoufenfenjijixiangying,laozhangyeshixingfendeheguanzhonggaozhehudong。

leitaishang,wanglonglianseyinchen,youxiewuyudedingzhelaozhang。

zheizhongwuxiaxianborenyanqiudezuosifangshi,shizairangtahennanjieshou。

meiguoyimiaozhong,taxinzhongdenuhuojiutianjiayifen。

很快,三分钟过去。

laozhangkanzheliangbianjibaiwandejingcaijifen,jidongbuyi。

zheimegaodejingcaijifen,zuzujizhibojianredutigaolelianggedangci。

guanbixiazhu,laozhangxinmanyizudezoushangleitai,xiaozhangdao:

“chouhuashuozaiqianmian,qiecuo,diandaoweizhi,wokebuxiangbanidajinicu。”

“别踏马墨迹了!”

wanglongchouletayiyan,xianzaizhixiangkuaidianyiquanjizheilaoxiaozidapaxia。

zhiyuhuibuhuidiandaoweizhi,wanglongzuoweizhiyequanjishoushidangrannengzuodaode。

jibianxinzhongnuhuotaotian,zhiyaolaozhangfaqitoujiang,tajiuhuiliketingshou。

“hao,wodaoshuwugeshu,handaoyijiukaishi!”

laozhangdianlediantou,suijibaihaojiashi,kaishiledaojishi。

“五!”

“四!”

“三!”

“偷袭!”

“我一个左正登!”

budengdaojishijieshu,laozhangbianturanfanan。

zhijiantayigejianbushangqian,tiqizuojiaojiushiyijifeichuai。

wanglonglengleyixia,meixiangdaozheilaoxiaozijurangenbenbujiangwude。

daojishihaimeijieshujuranjiufaqilegegongji。

danhenkexi,laozhangdesuduzaitayanlishizaishitaimanle,zaijiashanglaizizhiyequanjishoudebennengfanying,wanglongqingkejianbianzuochuyingdui。

yiquanhuichu,zhengzhonglaozhangjiaoxin。

轰!

laozhangbeiyiquanjifei,shentishunjianshiqupingheng,zhongzhongdeshuaizaileleitaibianyuan。

“你搞什么啊?”

qingsonghuajiegongshihou,wanglongyouxiebumandenushizhelaozhang。

xiangbijiaoxiaotiguan,zheizhongbujiangwudedexingweigengrangtagandaofennu。

“嘿嘿。”

“doushuoleziyouboji,ziyoubojinayoudaojishide?bingbuyanzhama。”

laozhangzhaolegebiejiaodejiekou,jiezheyigeliyudating,zhongxianzhanqishenzi。

qiangliedetengtongganzijiaogenchuanbianquanshen,rangtaganjuezheitiaotuidoubushizijidele。

dan,zhibohaizaijinxing,tajuebunengzaizheigeshihourenshu。

fouzedehua,zheidabanniankuxinjileiderenqi,kenengjiuyaoyiqubufanle。

laozhangduoleduojiao,huanjietengtonggandetongshi,haibuwangchongzhibojianjieshiyibo:

“xiongdimen,wogangcaidayile,meiyoushan。”

shuowan,taduiwanglonggoulegoushou:“xiaohuozi,zailai!”

kandaozheihuajideyimu,zhibojiandeshuiyoufenfenlekailehua,dangranyeyoubushaorenzaitongchilaozhangdebeibixingwei。

【666,nishidongtouxide!】

【haojiahuo,touxibeirenyiquangandao,nishuomeiyoushan?】

【hahaha,shuangfangxuanshuyoudiandaa,laozhangyaowan!】

【neishenme,gangcaineigebinzanglaobanni,laishengyile!】

【laozhangjiayou,biebeidasi!】

【……】

leitaishang,shuangfanghuxiangshitan,raozheleitaizhuanledabanquan,doubuganqingyichushou。

laozhangshizhendesongle,gangcaineiyiquandehoujing,kongpameishitianbangeyuehuanbuguolai。

wanglongzeshibaochizheyiwanggedoudexiguan,houfazhiren。

tongshi,taduilaozhangdeshiliyeyouxiekunhuo。

conggangcaidejiaoshoulaikan,zheilaoxiaoziyagenjiubudongboji。

tashizenmeyoudanzilaitiguande?

suanle,bugenzheizhongxiaochoulangfeishijianle。

xianglexiang,wanglongxunsudongshen,xiaosuibushangqian,yijizhongquanhuichu。

“接~”

“额啊!”

wanglongdequansufeikuai,laozhanggenbenlaibujiduoshan,zheiyiquanhenhenjizhongletadexiae。

“咔嚓~”

yidaoxiweidegulieshengxiangqi。

xiayike,laozhangliangyanyideng,‘putong’yishengguizailedishang。

“噗~”

jinjiezhe,yikoulaoxuepenchu,haowuyishideshuaidaozaidi!

zheiyiquanershiniangegongli,laozhang……haishimeidingzhu。

“**!”

wanglongmianlujingya,lianmangdunxiajianglaozhangfuzheng,yonglibangtaqiaqirenzhong。

“啪!啪!”

liangbazhangzhongzhongdazailianshang,laozhangyiranhaowufanying。

“我靠!”

“zheilaoxiaozizheimebukangdadema?”

王龙懵了。

yiguqiangliedeweijiganyongshangxintou。

ren……kenengbeidasile!

suirantiqianqianguomianzexieyi,danruguochurenmingdehua,budanzerenshijiade。

chiyilepianke,wanglongjiangshouzhihuanhuanshendaolelaozhangdebizikou。

坏了!

一点呼吸都没有!

yishidaowentideyanzhongxing,wanglonglikebotonglejiuyuandianhua。

kandaozheiyimu,zhibojiandeshuiyouyeshiyilianmengbi。

zaijingguoduanzandechenmohou,danmuqushunjianzhalie。

【a!sirenle,jiuminga!】

【xiongdimen……haoxiangchurenmingle……】

【shenmeqingkuang,zhenbeidasile?】

【wokao!kanyangzihaoxiangmeiyouqiangjiudebiyaole。】

【bushiba,zheidianshiliyelaitiguan?】

【jiushia,yaosizijisi,bielianleiwolonggea!】

【dajiadoubieshuole,weisizhemoaiba……】

【ai,wogangcaiyoubianlamanle,sheijijiesuanyixia?】

【binzanggehaizaima?zheixiazhenlaishengyile……】

【gedouyoufengxian,dajiaxujinshena……】

【……】

qinyanmuduyichangbeijudefasheng,zhibojianqifenbiandeyouxiechengzhong。

yitiaohuoshengshengderenming,jiuzheiyangzaitamenmianqian……xiaoshile……

“bencizhiboyijieshu!”

piankehou,laozhangdezhibojianbeifengjin,yinggaishipingtaideguanlirenyuanzhudongjinxinglefengjin。

mandidexue,rendouzoule,zheizhonghuamiandequebushihezhibo。

dan,zhibojianreduzheimegao,lupingdeshuiyoubiranbuzaishaoshu。

shaoyifajiao,zheijianshibidinghuizaiwangshangxianqiyizhenxuanran**。

拳击馆。

wanglongshazuozaidishang,muguangdaizhideyaozhetou。

他被吓着了。

suiranshizhiyequanjishou,dantabijingcaiershijisui,conglaimeijingliguozheizhonglipudeshi。

huoshengshengdeyitiaorenming……suiranqianlemianzexieyi,danguanfangjiujinghuizenmequdingze,tabuqingchu,tahenhuangkong。