第1章 周姐森林惊现东北虎吓瘫周姐

“兄弟们早上好。”

zhoujiekaiqizhibo,duizhejingtoudaleyigedadadehaqian。

gongsizhenbushiren,tahaimeishuixing,jiubeirengjinlesenshanlaolinli。

zhuanyoulebantianliangerenyingdoumeikandao,rangtajishengqiyouwunai。

yuzhoujiezaogaodexinqingxiangbi,zhibojianlidewangyouqueyigebiyigexingfen。

“huwaizhibozhendelaile?shufenniyeyoujintian,hahaha!!!”

“shangyiqishilaonvren,tabeidiujinleshamoli,kudeneijiaoyigecanjuerenhuan。”

“senlinfuben,woxihuan!!!”

“nimenchenglirenzhenhuiwan,ruguozaiyougeheisijiagaogenjiuwanmeile。”

“zheimeshuodehua,wojiubudebutiyizuidixiongzhuangle。”

“woqu,zuomengsucaiyou!”

“......”

kanzhezheiqunwangyoubujinxingzailehuo,haizaisiyiyyta,zhoujieyaoyaqiechi,“xiangshani?”

“laoniangyeshidagongren。”

“wanchenglaobanjiaodaidegongzuoeryi,daonimenzuilichengshenmele?”

zhoujieyueshengqi,wangyoujiuyuelaijing。

“hahaha,shufenjuranshuozijishidagongren?”

“kankanzijishenchudehuanjing,zaikankanmeiyueweiguibeikoudiaodeqian。”

“youmeiyouyizhongkeneng,laobangenbenjiumeibanidangren。”

周姐:“**!”

“genlaobanshenqingzhanggongzi:gongsimeiniyiyangzhuan。”

“genlaobanshuoxiangxiuxi:zheigongzuonibuzuosheilaizuo?”

周姐:“扎心!”

“laobanxinqinghao:gongsijiushinidejia。”

“laobanxinqingbuhao:niyiweigongsishinijiaya。”

周姐:“妈德!”

jujucaizaileidianshang,zhoujiedeqingxuzhijiebeidaipaopian。

jiazhibeianpailebuleyidegongzuo,zhoujienule。

“zheigongzuolaoniangshiyifenzhongdouganbuxiaqule,huiqujiucizhi,90houyenengzhengdunzhichang!”

“aiyo,zhoujiejiyanle!”

“nimenkuaibieshuole,shufenyaoshibuganle,wokansheijinimenjianghuangduanzi。”

“yihoukanbudaoshenvhe**,zaizuodedouyouzeren。”

“zhoujiewocuole,xiangxiangnideshouru,biechongdonga。”

cishidezhoujienatingdejinquan,tayibianzhaolu,yibiandeqihuhudeshuodao:“shuodaoshourugenglaiqi。”

“zheiyekou,neiyekoude,nadaoshoudegenbenmeiduoshao。”

“woderanglaobanzhidao,wozhoujieyeshiyoupiqide。”

yankanwanxiaokaidale,wangyoumenganjinzhuanyihuati。

“shufen,nibieluancuan,zhouweiliangelubiaodoumeiyou,wanyimilujiubuhaole。”

“kebushima,tingshuoshanlihuiyouyeshoue,tinggegedehuabiexiapao。”

“jiushi,nijiubupapaochugelaohulai?”

kandaozheihua,zhoujierenbuzhusuolesuobozi,querengranzuiying:“laohupashenme,laoniangjiushimulaohu。”

“yoyoyo,jiunihaimulaohuni?zuiqiangwangzheyige!”

“buguoshuozhende,jingchangyouzaixinwenshangkandaoyeshenglaohushangrendebaodao。”

“woyekandaoguo,yeshengdedongbeilaohunimenzhidaoba?zonghuangpimao,heibaitiaowen,toudingyigewangzi,kanzheneijiaoyigeweiwubaqi,tingshuozhandouligengheren,shenmeshizigouxiongkandaota,doudekaobianzhan,tianshengzidaiwangzheqixi。”

“duiduidui,jiuxianghoumiandashitoushangpazhedeneizhiyiyang。”

“**!!!“

“zhendeyoulaohu!!!”

“zhoujie,nitemeshishenmetizhi,zhenjiniyudaole!!”

zheitiaodanmuyichu,zhibojianlidewangyouquandoujingshenle。

shuwanrensisidedingzhepingmu。

erkandaodanmudezhoujie,xinzangchadiantiaochulai。

“ni..nimenbiekaiwanxiaoa。”

tabennengdexiangyaoniutouqukan。

kehaimeidongni,jiuyoubeidanmujihedao。

“buyaokanbuyaokan!!!”

“neilaohuhaoxiangzaishuijue,chentameifaxianni,ganjinzou。”

“duiduidui,dongzuoxiaoyidian,biechaoxingta,tixingzheimedadelaohu,yaoshibeitafaxianle,nijiudejiaodaizaizheile。”

“......”

“好。”

zhoujieyaozheyadiandiantou,leihuayijingzaiyankuanglidazhuan。

genbenbuyonghuitou,jiuyijingnengzaishoujifanshedehuamianzhongkandaoleneipangrandawu。

neimedadelaohu,tahaizhizaidianshilikandaoguo。

cishi,neizhilaohuzhengbizheyan,haoxiangzhendezaishuijue。

jianlaohumeiyoufaxianta,zhoujiecaiganmaikaibuziqiaoqiaowangwaizou。

shenlinlidelu,bianbuzheshuzhiheluoye。

zhoujiemeizouyibu,jiaoxiadounengfachu“gezhi”deshengyin。

tazoudeneijiaoyigedanzhanxinjing,shengpayigebuxiaoxinjiubalaohujichaoxingle。

zaizheijidadejingshenyalixia,haimeizoujibulu,tadehoubeijiuyijingshitoule。

zhengdangtazaiananqingxingnengjiaoxingtaolishi,yuguangquepiejiandaoyigexiaoshenying。

zheiyifaxian,tongshiyerangzhibojiandewangyoudaoxiyikoulengqi。

“zen...zenme,zheilizenmehuiyouxiaohaizi?”

“woqu,tadefumuni?tazenmelaisenlinlide?”

“wanlewanle,zheixiaonvhaililaohuneimejin,laohuyizhengyanjiunengkandaota。”

“zhoujie,nibiejizhezou,nikuaijiujiuta。”

“......”

huamianlituranmaochudexiaonvhai,rangwushuwangyoudexindoutidaolesangziyan。

jiuzaijulizhoujiebuyuandedifang,zhanzheyigekanshangqucailiangsansuidenaituanzi。

naituanzisongsongkuakuadezhalianggeyangjiaobian,roudududexiaolianshangzhanmanlenitu。

kutuibeiwandaodexigai,luchuleliangtiaorulianoubandexiaoduantui。

cishi,naituanziyekandaolezhoujie。

tajuqishoulidexiaotieqiao,putaoyiyangdedayanjingxiaochengleyueyazhuang:“jiejie,piaoliangjiejie。”

buzhidaoshibushicuojue,tazheiyihan,zhoujieganjuelaohuyuanbenbizhedeyanjingmileqilai。

......