第1章 奇葩娘炮

“ng,pifubucuo,jiushinianjidaledian,zheinvrena,yiguo25suijiukaishizouxiapolu,buxiangwomennanrencaishizhengzhuangnian,neige,mafanlanxiaojiekeyizhanqilaixiama?”duimiandenanrenyizhishouxiangshang,zuolegelanhuazhi,duizhelanweiqingniangshengniangqideshuo。

lanweiqingrenzhenuqi,haizhuangnian,nimaniyouzhuangnianma?ruguozheibushiqinyimajieshaojitade,tafashizijiyidingzhaobeizuiguntangdekafeipozaiduimiandeqipalianshang,zaiguoqudeshifenzhongli,zheigenanrenconglanweiqingdeshangyipipandaoxiezi,congshuangyanpishuodaofengxiong,nima,talanweiqingzaichayeshidingzhexiaohuademaoziyiluzoudaoxianzaide,juranrangtaqujiashenshuangyanpi、kaiyanjiao、dianbiliang、dapingguoji、fengchunwaijialongxiong。

yebukankanzijineiyang?haodaiyeshigenanrenba?fenmodeyidalanhuazhijiushuashuadewangxiadiao,yaobushiyoulianggeyanpi,zhenbuzhidaotayanjingzhangzainali,liulezhangfajiunengdangxijianchui,yizoujinyadianjiunengxiaoshou,pei、pei、pei,renjianantongyeshiyoupinweide。

lanweiqing,ren、ren、ren,xiangxiangyimaneikukoupoxindeyangzihelaomaneihenjiadebiaoqing,huodezhanleqilai。

duimiandexijianchuimizheneibenlaijiuzhengbukaideyanjingzixidedaliangzhelanweiqingdeshencai,“aiya,nizheigegeziyoudiangaoa!”

lanweiqingqiangrenzhe,waizhetoumianqiangdejichuyigexiao,landeshuohua,genninzhei165deerjicanfeilaibitalanweiqing167queshigaoledian。

“buguomeiguanxi,yihouwomenjiehunle,nibiechuangaogenxiejiushile,haiyounizheituitaixile,yaotaicule,woxihuankuadadehaoshengerzi,nvrentuiculeyouliliangfangbianneige……,nidongde!”shuozhehaijilanweiqingpaolegemeiyan,lanweiqingchadianmeirenzhutule,sheitamagennijiehuna!

“haiyoua,nizheituibuzhengba?xxinga?zeze,nvrenzenmenengbatuizhangzheiyanga,shibushinimayichuandebuhaoa……”

“nimacaiyichuandebuhao!”

哗……

jiangyibeikafeipozailenanrenfenbaidelianshang。

lanweiqingzairenshoulezheigenanrenjiangjinershifenzhonghouchedidebaonule,batashuodeyiwushichujiuxinglexianzaihaishuoqitalaomalaile,zheitamasheiyangdeerzi?

“ganmani?ganmani?nixiangmoushaa。”chezhegongyasangzi,duimiandenanrenzhanqilaijiuxiangchelanweiqingdeshangyi,kexigenchuanlegaogenxiedelanweiqingbiqilai,yajiuyizhengzongdeaizi,lanweiqingxianghouyitui,neijiahuozhijiepulegekong,jiangzhuozishangdekafeiziyezhanzaileshenshang。

“hehe。”lanweiqinglengxiaoyisheng,guoranchun,zhuanshenjiuzou。

“jianrennibiezou,wogaosuniguolezheicunjiumeilezheidian,womenjiakeshiyousantaofangzaishizhongxinni,duoshaonvrenxianggenwo,jiunizhei28suidelaonvren,wokandeshangnijiubucuole。”tangzhedekafeishengshengzaineinanrenlianshangshuachujitiaomaise,yufenmeidiaodedifangxingchengxianmingdeduimian,ganqingzheigemenshizaizijilianshangtuleyitongshihuifenme?

“fangxin,wojiushizheibeizihuannvrenxihuanyebuzhaorenyao。”lanweiqingliuxiazheijuhua,zhijiechulekafeiguan,kandoubuxiangkanneinanrenyiyan,zheitamadoushixieshenmewanyia?shangcineigeshanglaijiuyaokaifang,shenshoujiuxiangzhantabianyi,zheicidaohaohuangeniangpao,bujiushi28lema?nvrensanshihaiyizhihuani!

lanweiqinghuaizhezhuangliedexinqinglikai,keshizoudaoyibanjiuyanle,suansuanzheishitade108cixiangqin,maligebi,jiushishangliangshan108tiaohaohandouqile,keshitalanweiqinglengshimeipengjianyigekaopudenande,haizhenyingleneijuhua,bushizaixiangqinjiushizaixiangqindelushang,congershiqisuishengrihou,zaiqidayibadagudeanpaixia,lanweiqingjiuzoushanglezheitiaobuguilu。

真是衰透了!

xinqingyiyu,ganjuerenshengwuwang,huntuyipianmiaomang,lanweiqingjuedingqugouwu。

rujindelanweiqingyezhinengyonggouwulaiweijitaneikongxujimolengdeneixinle,shengnvdexinsisheinengdong?shuolaitalanweiqinggefangmiantiaojianyebuchaa,yaoshencaiyoushencai,yaomoyangyoumoyang,yaoxueliyouxueli,gongzuoyeshiwubaiqiangdewaiqi,dangchugengshibdaluntanshangrenqizuihuodexiaohua,keweihejinianhoulunluodaozheizhongdibu?

悲呼哀哉!

gengkebeideshilanweiqingmeizihuole28suihaimeiyoutanguolianai,meijieguowen,dianxingdelaochunvyimei,ruguoxiaoxuesannianjidelianaibusuandehua。

kanlekanbiebiedeqianbao,lanweiqingjuedingxianququqian,zheijiniantazheinvboshiyejiuqiongdeshengxiaqian,shoudeshengxiaxiongle,xiangxiangzijishenbiandenvde,haizidounengdajiangyoule,nande,quansheng170lingbudaodeaicuoqiongle。

zuoweiyigezhengdiandebaifumei,lanweiqingjipolenaodaidouxiangbutong,xiangbutong。

aiyuandemiaoleyanqianmiandequkuanji,zuihouhenhendetileyijiao,gangcainaozilidedongxirangtataifennuquqiandeshihoujingranbakazheduanle,nima,taibeicuile!

guoranrendaomeideshihouheshuiyenengsaiyafeng。

lanweiqingbaozhezijidejiao,tengdexiaoliandouzhouyiqile,zheibuyifennu,jingtaida,bajiaotitengle。

wunaizhixia,lanweiqingyiqueyiguaidewangyinxinglimianzou,zaozhidaozijixingqingzheimebuhao,tadangchujiuyinggaixianggudaidenanrenyangtongyangxiyiyangyanggexiaolaogong,zuihaoyangchengzhongquanxing,jiubuhuixiangxianzaizheimebeicuile。

ai,meiyouxianjianzhimingdenvrenhuogaidanshen。

chouwanhao,lanweiqingguaizhetui,zhongyukeyizuoxiale,zhishi44haoni?lianchougehaodouzheimebujili,lanweiqingaiyuandexiang。

叮铃铃,叮铃铃……

“wokao,shenmazhuangkuang?”lanweiqinghaimeizuowenjiubeineizheneryulongdejingbaoshenghedezhanzhileshenzi,zheishizaifangkongyanlian?

“dunxia,quanbudunxia!”yigeshengyinguaiyidenanrenchonglejinlai,xianrandaizhebianshengqi,lanweiqinghaoqidetaitoujiukandaoyigenazheqiangdeweisuonanren,neitoushangtaodeshisiwama?

噗……

neijiadaoyanzaipaidianying,zheimeesudejuqingyelai?

“sheizaixiao?”lingyigejinlaidetongyangtaozhesiwadenanrenehenhendewen,lanweiqingganjindunxia,tazuijinzoumeiyun,shaoreyishishiyishi。

“shibushini?”neifeituyongqiangzhizhepangbiandeyigenvren,neigenvrenhedezhiyaotou,neifeituehenhendezaipangbiandaleyiqiang,zheixialanweiqingshayanle,gangcaibeiqiangdaguodedifang,shengshengdichuleyigeheikulong,nima,wanzhende?

lanweiqingfaxianzijishentizaidou,tahaishidiyicijiandaozhenqiangzhenfeituzhenqiangyinxing,zheicijineishitazheixiaoshenbannengchengshoude!

wuhu,shuaidaodagunainaidefenlile,xianshiniangpaoxiangqinnan,zaishizheduanyinxingka,jiezhezaoyuqiangjie,lianjiaotengzheizhongshiqingyijingbunengsuanzaidaomeilile,zheigenbenjiubushiyigejibie!

“bieduoshi,ququqian。”yigemingxianlingtoudejiahuo,zhizhilelingyigejiahuodebaolixingwei,zhizhizheicilaidemude。

lanweiqingkanbudao,pingzhetingjuezhidaofeituququqianle。