doushishenghuoleixingdexiaoshuodatongxiaoyi,《lingyizhongmingyun:congwumingxiaobeikaishinixi》zheibenshurangrenyanqianyiliang,zhangbeiyuxiaoqidegushimailuoqingxi,beifengcigudewenbixiaosa,jiegouyanjin,xiedehenhao,zhidetuijian。zhuyaojiangdeshi:yanzhurenzheijijuhuawanquandianfuletayuanlaiderenzhi,tawanwanmeixiangdao,yigexuexiaodejiaodaozhurenhuigenyigexiaohunhunyaomianzi。……
第5章丑人多作怪
zhangbeiyubeixiaoqiwendeyakouwuyan,buzhisuocuo。tahenxiangshuozuoweinidenanpengyou,weishenmemeiyouquanliguan。kezheijuhuatashizaishuobuchukou,yinweitabushixiaoqidenanpengyou,zheiyezhishitadanfangmiandexiangfabale。
chenmopianke,xiaoqihuoxushijuedezijiyouxieguofen,yongshaoweiwenheyidiandeyuqishuo,tamendoushizijidepengyou,dajiaduitadouhenhao,buyaoduirenjiayouzheimeshendediyiyunyun。
“nizenmegenxiaoshihouyiyang?biedenanshenggenwoshuojuhuanidouyaofahuo,womenyijingzhangdale,zhangbeiyuxiaopengyou,ninengbunengchengshuyidian!”xiaoqikukoupoxindeyoushuoleyidadui。
zhangbeiyuyiyanbufa,xinzhonghenbushiziwei。xiaoqidebianhua,takanzaiyanli。kedangniduiyigerenhuoyijianshizhimidaoyidingchengdu,jiuhuizidongguolvyiqiebuhaode。
shitangdefancaishizaisuanbushanghaochi,jinguanruci,zhangbeiyuhaishiqudaleliangcifan,chidejinjinyouwei。zaidisanwanfanjijiangbeixiaomiedeshihou,yigebusuzhikechuangjinletadeshixianzhong。
zuibuxiangjiandaoderen,pianpianjiuchuxianle。zhangmaoshuangshouchazaikoudai,yaoyaohuanghuangdezouguolai,shenhouhaigenzheliuqigeren,dalaoyuandejiukaishihan:“aiyou,ganglaidiyitianjiutamapaoniu,wokankanshishei。”
duizhangbeiyulaishuo,aidundabusuanshenme,kejuebuyunxuyourenqinfantashouhudelingdi,xiaoqijiushineipianlingdi。tasaoleyiyan,sisiwozhushouzhongdekuaizi,zhangmaoruozhishilaidoudoutayejiubale,ruguozhendeganduixiaoqizuoshenme,tajiuganbakuaizi**zhangmaodexiongtang。
zhangmaoyilianjianxiao,zhanzailiangrendeshenbian,duizhexiaoqizuokankanyoukankan,youruoyousuosidekanlekanzhangbeiyu,“yuanlaishixiaoqia,meixiangdaonixiaozihaitingyouqian。”
zhangbeiyubumingdewangzheta,zijiqiongdedingdangxiang,yebuzhidaotacongnakanchuzijiyouqian。
xiaoqichixiaoliangsheng,duizhangmaoshuo:“nibieluanshuo,zheishiwodefaxiao,ganggangzhuandaosangaolai。wotingshuozaoshangnimenliangyoudianwuhui,jiwogemianzi,zheishijiuguoqule。”
zhangmaozhuangzuohuangrandawu,pinpindiantou,“e!yuanlaishifaxiao,hehehe。nixiaoqikaikou,wodangrandejimianzi,jiufangguozheixiaozi。buguo,zheizhoumopeiwochuquwanwanba。”yibianshuo,tayibianfuxialeshenzi,qingqingzhuazhulexiaoqideyushou。
zhangbeiyuturandahanlesheng:“fangshou!”zheiyishenghan,bujinbazhangmaoheleyitiao,haibashitanglidabanrendemuguangxiyinguolai。
zhangmaofaxianzhouweiderendouzaikanta,zaizheimeduorenmianqiandiulian,bujinshengqiyigunuqi,shenshouzhuazhuzhangbeiyudecanpan,yibafanguolai。“guang”yisheng,canpanlidefancaiquandousazaizhuozishang,youshuishunzhezhuoziliudaolezhangbeiyushenshang。
xiaoqizhanqilaidahandao:“zhangmao,nishenmeyisi!”zhangmaoshuangshouyitan,lenghengleyisheng:“nihaizhenbazijidanghaorenwule?bujiushigejime。”xiaoqilianshangbiedetonghong,dengdayanjinghenhendingzhezhangmao,ketabijingshigenvsheng,yebuganduizhangmaodongshou。
zhangbeiyuqiaoranzhanqilai,mengranshenchushouyibazhuaizhuzhangmaodeyiling,dichendeshuo:“jixiaoqidaoqian。”zhangmaolengleyixia,wanquanmeiyouxiangdaozhangbeiyuganduitadongshou,tafanyingguolaihou,hehedeganxiaoliangsheng,“nidanerkezhenfei,rangwojiaojiaonizenmezaisangaozuoren。”
zhangmaoyishenglingxia,tashenbiandeliuqigexiaohunziyiyongershang。zhangbeiyushunshouzhuaguocanpanwangqianrengchuqu,panlidefancaiyoushuisadetamenmanshendoushi。jinjiezheyibazhuazhuxiaoqideshou,hanleshengpao,lazhetajiuwangwaipao。
yinweilazhexiaoqixingdongbubian,meipaochujibu,zhangmaoderenmashangjiuzhuileguolai。
zhangbeiyutuilexiaoqiyiba,zhunbeirangtaxianzou,zijiliuxialaidangzhuzheixieren。tayizhuanshen,kanjianyigeshuxideshenyingcongshitangmenkouzoujinlai,bujinlengzhu。
“chourenduozuoguai,zhangmaoguai,nizheimingzizhenbushibaijiaode。”jiangnanshuangshouchazaikoudai,zuilidiaozhegenyan,weiweidizhetouzouguolai。
xiaoqizhuantoukanqu,lianshanglikefuxianchuxiaorong,“nange!”zhangbeiyukanzaiyanli,tadexinmengranshousuo,fangfobeishenmechudong。rendemingshudeying,yigeqiangdademinghao,nenggourangshenbiandepengyouanxin,nenggourangdirendanhan,jiangnanjiushiruci。raner,taquemeifaxianjiangnankanxiaoqishi,yanliliuluchudeyisiyane。
jiangnanshenhouyijiugenzheciweitoutamenjige。jingguozhangbeiyushenbianshi,jiangnanduitaweiweidiantou,biandaizherenraoguoliangren,zhanzailezhangmaomianqian。
qifenshunjianjinzhang,shuangfangrenmajianbanuzhang,zhouweidexueshengyedoubuganshuohua,shifenanjing。
zhangmaoyiliandeyinyu,jinjindingzhejiangnan,“nitamamasheini!”
haimeidengjiangnankaikou,shenhoudezhangbeiyuxiaoshengshuoleyiju:“sheichoumashei。”zheijuhuashengyinbuda,danzairucianjingdehuanjinglijiuxiandegewaicierle。
“hahahaha!”zhouweilikechuanlaiyipianhongxiao。zhangbeiyuyegenzhexiaoleliangsheng,zheigeshihouyoujiangnanweizijichengyao,tadedanziyedalebushao。
jiangnanweiweiyixiao,yongkanruozhideyanshenkanzheta,“yaodajiuda,budajiugun,biexianggedashazisidezaizheichuzhe。”
huayinyiluo,ciweitoutamenjigerenwangqianzouleyibu,shitangliyechuanlaisaodong,hualayixiaweishangyiqunren。zhangbeiyuwangqianyikan,shaoshuoyeyousiwushihaoren,erqiekanshangqu,yeshixuexiaolidexiaohunhun。
“jiangnan,zenmehuishi?”“jiangnan,yongbuyongbangmang?”“jiangnan,jintiantagandongniyixia,wojiurangtazoubuchushitang。”zheiqunrenweizaijiangnanshenbian,niyijuwoyiju,qizuibashede。
zhangbeiyuxinzhongananchijing,zheixierendoushibiedebanjide,shenzhihaiyouchuanzhemicaifudegaoyixinsheng,kejianjiangnanzaisangaoderenyuanshiyouduohao!
“weiwei!neibiandexuesheng,sankaisankai,buzhundajia!”shitanglimianjigelaoshizhanqilaihouleyisheng,waimiandebaoanyewangzheibianwangguolai。
ganggangzhishisanwugerendaomeishenme,zheiyixiajujileyouwushiduoren,tamenjiubunengzuoshibuguanle。zhangmaozheimeyiting,lianshanglimaluchuxiaorong,tiaoxindekanzhejiangnan。
jiangnanyexiaole,“hahaha。”xiaozhexiaozhe,taturanlengxialian,“niyiweiwobugandongni?palaoshi,wojiubuchulaikangqile!”shuowan,yibazhuazhuzhangmaodeyiling。
zhangbeiyuxinliyijing,meixiangdaozheijiangnanshuodongshoujiudongshou。ruguozhendedaqilai,tayexuhainengchenluanbushangliangjiao,keshizhuannianyixiang,jiangnanweilezijigenzhangmaodashou,haishiyouxiekuijiu。
“jiangnan!”congshitangmenkouchuanlaiyishengpaoxiao,suoyourendouzhuantoukanguoqu。
zhangbeiyugezigao,taitouyueguorenqun,kandaoyanzhurenqishixiongxiongdezouguolai,xinxiang:zheiyanzhurenlaidekezhenjishi,nayoushi,nayouta。
jiangnansongkaishou,wanghoutuileliangbu,lianshangdebinglengyesuizhibianchengtadezhaopaiweixiao。yanzhurendengzhetadahan:“sanle!”jiangnanshuangshoutankai,yiyanbufa,xiaokanyanzhuren。
zhangbeiyusichukanyiquan,tazhidaozhouweiderendoushilaibangjiangnande,danmeixiangdao,weilejiangnan,jingranlianyanzhurendoubupa。jiangnanbudong,zheixierenmeiyouyigerenzoukai。
yanzhurenmenhengyisheng,dixiatouxiaoshengdao:“jiangnan,jintianshikaixuediyitian,woyexiangqingjingqingjing。wojinimianzi,niyedejiwogemianzi,biezhenyiweiwoshoushibuleni!”
zhangbeiyuzhangdazuiba,bukesiyidekanzheyanzhuren。
yanzhurenzheijijuhuawanquandianfuletayuanlaiderenzhi,tawanwanmeixiangdao,yigexuexiaodejiaodaozhurenhuigenyigexiaohunhunyaomianzi。
xiaoqixiaomimidezoudaotashenbian,yongshouzhoupenglepengta,“fangxinba,youjiangnanzai。”zhangbeiyuzaihuiguotou,xiaoqikanzhejiangnandeyanshenli,jingranyouneimeyisichongbai。
yigezhengzhirexuefeitengdedananhai,hechangbuxiangyaozheizhongganjue?
jiangnanweiweihanshou,yanzhurenzaicitaitoudahan:“jiangnan!jiaotamensanle!”zhangbeiyuganggangkanjianleliangrenzhijiandejiaoliu,zhidaozheishizuochangxi。yichanglaoshixiangxueshengyaomianzidexi。
jiangnanzhuanshenshuanglangdexiaoleliangsheng,“xiexiegeweixiongdizhanchulaitingwo,jiangnanjixiale,meishile,meishile,dahuosanleba!”tazheimeyishuo,bigangcaiyanzhurenhandeneiliangsangziguanyongduole,renqunhulayixiasankai。
zhangbeiyuxinzhongkaishiyouxiexianmujiangnan,zheicaishinanren。
youyuyanzhurendedaolai,zheijiazuizhongshimeidaqilai。zhangmaoyedaizherenzoule,zheiyicitameiyouzaishuo“jizhule!dengzhe!”zheiyileidefeihua,xiangfan,quefeichangpingjing。
zhangbeiyuzijixinliluanxiang,zheishibushijiujiaobaofengyuqiandepingjingni?haodebulinghuaideling,tameiyouxiangdao,zijizheigexiangfa,mashangjiuyaochengzhen。
renchaosanqu,jiangnanpaipaizhangbeiyudejianbang,zhixiangshitangdedongnanjiaoshuo:“neilishiwomenbandedipan,yihouquneichiba。”zhangbeiyuxiaozheshuoleshengxiexie。ketaxinliqingchu,qibandedipanyouruhe,qibanshangxiawuliushiren,chulejiangnan,meiyourenduitayouhaogan。
zaizheiqijian,xiaoqiduijiangnanbiaoxianchuqiansuoweiyoudereqing,raozaitashenbianjijizhazha,“nange,nigangcaitaishuaile,jijuhuajiubazhangmaojiejuele。”“nange,nijiwoliugedianhuabei。”“nange,shenmeshihouyoukong,womenyiqichigefanbei。”
mianduixiaoqidereqing,jiangnanbiaoxiandeshifenlengmo,weiweizhoumei,ouerayisheng。xiaoqidejuanfaxiandehenkeai,chuanzhexiaochenshan、duanqun,jueduisuandeshangmeinv。suoyi,zheigechangmianzaiwairenkanlai,jiangnansihuyouxiebujinrenqing,duiyigemeinvdereqingshiruowudu。
zhangbeiyukanchuliangrendeyiyang,qingqinglalelaxiaoqi,duijiangnandaolexie。jiangnankanjianzhangbeiyu,mashangluchuxiaorong,suiyishuolejiju,jiudairenliqu。
shitanglihenkuaihuifulepingjing,liangrenchulaizhihou,xiaoqiduizhangbeiyushuo:“nigenjiangnanzaiyigeban,zenmebugaosuwoa。”zhangbeiyunaolenaotou,gandaoyizhenmoming,jiuwentagenjiangnanshishenmeguanxi。xiaoqishuo,wodaoshixianggentayoudianguanxi,kexirenjiabuliwo。
zhangbeiyuyiting,lianshangshanguoyisiganga。xiaoqixiaozheshuo:“aiya,bushinixiangdeneiyang。zaisangao,meiyourenbuxianggenjiangnanzuopengyou。”
jiezhe,tajiandandeshuoledianguanyujiangnandeshiqing。
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