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chuxianzaiwomianqiandeshiyigeshaonv，muceshibajiudeyangzi！
tachuanzheyiximeilidehanfu，suoguruoyinruoxian，hanfudeyiliaobaidefangfotouming，weiweifanguang，jiuxiangxiannvjianglinfanchen。
zaitagugudexiongqian，youyigejinhuangsedelingdangzhuangshi，kanqilaishineimedelingdong，gengjiachentuochuyizhongqinglingzhimei。
hanfuxiabaishiyoudidaogaodehuxian，qunjiaoshangneixingxingdiandiandezuanshi，huangruwushumeilidechenlu。
wuheibizhidezhangfasanzaijianbangshang，zuobianfaduanxizheyigehulimianshidezhuangshipin，kanqilaiyichangqiaopi。
tadeyanjingxianghaishuiyiyangzhanlan，pifubaixi，huangrutiankongzhongdeyunduo。
tazaiweixiao，pianzhetou，dandande。
zhishibuzhidaoweishenme，zongjuedetadeyanshenyouyisidanmo！
haobukuazhangdeshuo，zheishiwojianguodezuimeilidenvren。
yanleyankoushui，woyouxiejiebadewendao：“ni……nirenshimiaoguiyan？”
“miaolaotouerma，tazheigerenxiemendehen，jingchanggenxiesuizhishierdajiaodao。”tabeizheshouwanyaoqiaopidao。
tingtazheimeshuo，wojiuzhidao，henkenengshizhaoduirenle！
“duiduidui，ninenggaosuwomiaoguiyanzaishenmedifangma？”
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huabi，meilishaonvqiantoudailu，wohoumiangenzhe。
kanzhetajuemeidebeiying，wozaixiang，zheinvrengaibuhuiyeshizheitiaojiezuopiroushengyideba？
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qiniubaguaidelaidaohutongdezuilimian，yigehenbuqiyandetanweiyingruyanlian。
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“tajiushilie！”shaonvzhilezhi，xiangshihenhaipaside，zhuanshenjiuhuanghuangzhangzhangdelikaile……
suiranwoyitouwushui，danyemeishijianduoxiang，jiucouleguoqu。
womianqiandelaotouziyanjinghunzhuowushen，ruliangtansishui，yifuhunhunyushuideyangzi。
chuwai，tayizhelalilata，shenshangdaizheyigusouweier，wogujiyixieaiganjingderenluguotadeshenbian，doudeniezhebizizou。
haibudengwoshuohua，laotouziwushendeyanjingturanchuxianliangtuanjingmang，kaiqiangdao：“laizheilizhaowo，shinaoxiele？xiangwojinipopo？”
“daye，nizhenshuoduile，wohaoxiangzhuangxiele，wogennishuo，wozheiliangtian……”woxiangyaobazijizheiliangtiandezaoyutugeganjing。
“dazhu，xianbiejiangnideneiyitao！nidoujiangchulaile，wohaisuangeshenmejinger？”
zhilezhitamianqiandetanwei，laotouziyouduiwodao：“wozheilideguijunidongbu？”
“gui……guiju？shaguiju？”wobumingsuoyi。laizhiqian，xiaoliuyemeiyougenwotiqiguoa。
“wozheilideguiju，neijiushibixuzaiwodetanweishangmaiyiyangdongxi。tongguonimaidezheiyangdongxi，wobiankeyipanduanyier。shuobaile，genneixiecezideyouyiqutonggongzhimiao。”
“buguowotanweishangdezheixiedongxidoubujiandan，xuandinglejiudedaizou，bumaidehua，huizhaolaiwuwangzhizaide！”
tazheihuashidewomeitouyizhou，zongganjuezheishiqiangmaiqiangmaidebaxiba。
buguolaidoulaile，jiashangxiaoliubazheirenshuodehenshen，woyequeshimeibiedebanfale，zhiyaojiageheli，shishibei。
muguangzaitanweishangsaolesao，wocaifaxian，zheixiedongxiqueshibujiandan！
有些年头的绣花鞋！
gudainvrenyongdeyinzanzi！
bushixianzaizuogongdeguancaiding！
haiyouyixieqingtongjiantou、maotoudengdeng。
jirendeganjue，zheiwanquanshiyigegudongtanwei。
“ninlaozheibaidedoushigudonga？”wohaoqidewenleyizui。
“budongbiexiashuo，wozheixiedongxisuirandoushilaowanyier，danhaichengbushanggudong。zaiwokanlai，yinggaishitamenweixiongwu！”
“xiongwu？”tadehuarangwohunshenyijin。
benlaiwodougoudaomeile，zaimaizheizhongdongxidaihuijia，duobujilia！
zhengzheimexiang，laotouerjiehuadao。
“meicuo，zheixiedongxidoushiyougushidexiongwu，meiyijiandougenrenmingdazhebianer！”
buguwodeganshou，taziguzidejieshao。
“zheishuangxiuhuaxiejiushicongsirendejiaoshangquxiade！”
“zheixieguancaidingshiqingdaiyigedaguandeguancaishangqixialaide！”
“zheigeyinzanzi，shicongsirendexiongkoushang**de！haiyouzheixiejiantouhemaotou，zhanchangshangdewujianer，nayigebuzhandianrenxue？”
……
tayiyijieshaozhe，shengyinsuiman，dantingzheshishuobuchudeguiyi。
“bushi，ninlaomaizheizhongdongxijiwo，he……heshima？”wozuibayouxieduosuo。
“zheinixiaozijiubudongleba？suiranzheixieshixiongwu，danwujibifan，wangwangjiushixiongjingerdadewujianer，cainengzhenzhuyixiexiesui，jiurenxingming！”
wujibifanzheigedaoliwodong，suoyitadehua，rangwoxinlichangliangduole。
dixiatou，anzhaotadeguiju，wokaishixuandongxi。
zuizhong，woxuanzeleyizhangfangkongzhiqian。
zhisuoyixuanzheige，shizaiwokanlai，zheitanweishangdedoushilaodongxi，jibianshixiongwu，neijiaqianxiangxinyebuhuibianyile。
yizhangzhijiubuyiyangle，bujinjiagenengjieshou，jiusuandaihuijiayexianbuqishenmefenglang。
zaize，wochudeshierzhenghaogenqianyouguanxi，guishishenchade，bianxiangzhezheidongxikaojin。
kandaowodexuanze，miaoguiyanlianshangdebiaoqingbiandehenyansu。
“haoba！zheizhangzhiqiansuanshiwotanweishangzuibianyidehuole，shouniyiqiankuai！”
“**？yizhangzhiqianjuranyaowoyiqian？！”woyiweizijitingcuole。
“zadi？xiangui？womiaoguiyandedongxi，yeyourenxiangui？”
“e……daye，wobushineiyisi！womai！womaijiushile！erweimazainaer？”suiranxinteng，danjiudangpocaimianzai。
“zhishouxianjin，buzhenggaokeji！”talengshengdao。
wodianlediantou，keshiyitaodou，woxinlishigedengyixia。
yinweiwofaxian，woyidoulijiuzhizhuangzhewobuganhuadenei……yiqiankuai！
作者：池鱼小月
栏目：都市
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作者：安诺汉森
栏目：都市
我只会说实话，老婆求我快闭嘴
作者：方方爱吃番茄
栏目：都市
我上岸月球那天，前女友考研上岸
作者：常向上
栏目：都市
我给死人化妆的亲身经历
作者：八旬老贼
栏目：都市
江总，你的白月光是赝品
zuozhe：aichichaotianmiantiaodejiangqing
栏目：都市
