我活着，却成了她的墓碑凌乱的猫1-著

小说简介

wanzhengbanxiandaiyanqingxiaoshuo《wohuozhe，quechengletademubei》，ciwencongfabuyilaibiandedaolezhongduoduzhemendexiai，kejianzuopinzhiliangyouzhi，zhujiaoshilinwanwanqing，yeshizuozhelingluandemao1suoxiede，gushigenggai：wuzhudexiangnishuidehaizi。yuanlai，zaineipianjuewangdeshenyuanli，cengyouguozheiyangyishuangyanjingzaizhushizheta？bushiyinweilianmin，ershiyinwei……xianglingyigeren？zhijiankai……

精彩章节

1tishennianleiwohuozhe，quechengletademubeizanglishang，shenyanzhoushizhongmeikanshenpangdeqizilinwanyiyan。

tayiweizhangfuzhishiyinshiquchulianerbeishangguodu。zhidaozhengliyiwushi，tafanchuyibenfanhuangderiji。

“jintianyudaogeyanjinghenxiangwanqingdenvhai，tajiaolinwan。”“yishengshuowanqingzuihoudexinyuanshikanwoxingfu，

wojuedingqulinwan。”linwanzhandouzhejixuwangxiafan：“taliuchanle，

kewomannaozidoushiwanqingdangnianshiqudewomendehaizi。

”“weishenmetapaodechayongyuanburuwanqing...”zuihouyiyemojixinxian：“wanqing，qinianle，

wohaishizhiaini。”dangwanlinwantunlezhengpinganmianyao，beiqiangjiuhuilaihoushoudaoshenyanzhoudeduanxin：“yiyuan？

bienaole，wojinwanyaopeiwanqingkanliuxingyu。”linwanbadiaozhentouzoudaochuangbian，yekongcuican，

yuanchushantouyixiyoulianggerenying。tapingjingdicadiaoyanlei，congcizaimeitilihun。zhishishenyanzhoubuzhidao，

linwanmeiwandoubaozheneibenrijirushui。jiuxiangbaozhezijizhudingwuwangdeyusheng。

2muqianlengyushangqianhuisedeyunchenchendiyaxialai，kongqiyoushiyouleng，

xijinfeilidaizheyiguzitiexiuheyushuijintounitudexingqi。muyuanlidesongbo，

meiyigenzhenyedouningzhechenzhongdeshuizhu，chendiandiandizhuizhe，xiangyongyuanyeluobujindelei。

xinfankaidenituduizaineili，yanseshendefahei，sanfazheyizhongshengyingerbinglengdetuxingwei。

mubeishangneizhangnianqingnvrendezhaopian，xiangqianzaibinglengdeheisedalishili，zhengduizhemeiyigeqianlaigaobiederen，

zuijiaowanzhe，xiaodetianjingyouyaoyuan。zhaopianlideta，jiaosuwanqing。shenyanzhoujiuzhanzaineimuxuedebianyuan，

yishensushadeheisexizhuang，shenxingtingdebizhi，xiangyizunbeiyiwangzaihanfenglideshixiang。

yushuishunzhetawuheidefashaohuaxia，tangguocanbaidelianjia，zaixiahechuningchengshuizhu，

wushengdizajintajiaoxianeipianshiluludenituli。tademuguang，rutongshenglegen，

sisididingzaimubeishangneizhangxiaoxiaodezhaopianshang，neiyanshenkongmangdeheren，

fangfolinghunyibeineimuxueshenchudeheianchedixizoule，zhiliuxiayijubeiyushuichongshuadequqiao。

linwanzhanzaitashenpang，banbudejuli，quexiangshigezheyidaowufayuyuedebinglengshenyuan。

tatongyangchuanzheheisedequnzi，sujingdelianshangmeiyouzhifen，yushuishunzhetatongyangwuheidefasiliuxialai，

bingliangdechuganyizhimanyandaobojingshenchu。taweiweiceguotou，

shixianxiaoxinyiyidilveguoshenyanzhoubengjinde、xiantiaolengyingdexiahe，luozaitachuizaishencedeshoushang。

neishuangshouzhijieyonglidaofabai，sisidizuanzhe，zhijiashenshenqianjinzhangxin，liuxiajigeshenhongdeyueyayinhen。

taxinlibeiyizhiwuxingdeshouhenhenjiuleyixia，jianruideteng。taqiaoqiaoshenchushou，zhijiandaizheshitandeweizhan，

xiangqupengchutaneibinglengyoujiangyingdebeiwan，xiangchuandiyidiandianshuyuhuorendewenduguoqu。

zhijianganggangchupengdaotaxizhuangbinglengdemianliao，shenyanzhoudeshentiquemengdiyizhen，xiangbeishenmebujiededongxitangdao，

jianbangjiqixiweiqueyichangjuejuedixianghoubikailebanfen。neizhixuanzaibankongdeshou，

zhijiandeliangyishunjiandongjielexueye。linwandeshoujiangzaineili，tingzhuleduanzanyoumanzhangdeyishun，

caimanmandi、wushengdichuiluoxialai，jintiezaizijibingliangdequnce。neidianweiruodenuanyi，zhongjiumeinengsongchuqu，

zhizaibinglengdekongqililiuxiayidiantulaodelianyi。zhouweideailedichenwuyan，hunzheyayidechuoqisheng，

xiangdundaozigezherendeshenjing。shenyanzhoucongtoudaowei，meiyoukanguotayiyan。tadeshijieli，

cikezhiyoumubeishangneigeyonghengdinggedeweixiao。linwanchuixiayanjie，kanzhezijiheisegaogenxiejianshangjianshangdenidian，

xinlineidiankusedetiliangyoufuleshanglai：tazhishitaitongle，tongdeshiquleganzhiwaijiedenengli。wanqing，

bijingshitadechulian，shitaxinliyidaoyongyuanwufayuhedeshangkou。renqunkaishihuanmandirudong，

xiangyitiaochenmodeheiseheliu，xiangzhemuyuanchukoutangqu。heisedeyusanciqibifudichengkai，

huichengyipianyidongde、shiluludewuyun。linwanchengkaizijidesan，sangufachuqingweide“kada”sheng，

zaisijidekongqilixiandegewaiqingxi。tamomodijiangsanmianchaoshenyanzhouneibianqingxieguoqu，

shituweitadangzhuxiebinglengdeyushui。tayijiuwensibudong，muguangsisisuozaimubeishang。

yushuihenkuaidashilelinwanlingyicedejianbang，hanyitouguobobodeyiliao，zhiwanggutoufenglizuan。“yanzhou，

”tazhongyurenbuzhu，shengyinqingdexiangpajingraolemuxuezhongdeanmian，“gaizoule。

”shenyanzhouxiangshibeizheishenghuhuancongyaoyuandedifangzhuailehuilai，shentijibukechadihuangleyixia。

tajiqihuanmandi、jiqijiannandi，jiangshixiancongneifangxiaoxiaodezhaopianshangsikai，

muguangsaoguolinwanbeiyushuidashidejianbang，yanshenliquemeiyourenhebolan，

zhiyouyipianshenbujiandide、beijudaaishangtunshihoudehuangwu。tameiyoushuohua，shenzhimeiyoudiantoushiyi，

zhishijiaobuchenzhongdi、youxieliangqiangdi，zhuanshenchaozhechukoudefangxiangzouqu。neibeiyingtingzhi，

quetouzheyigubeichedichoukongleliqidejiangyinghecuiruo。linwanmomogenshang，yushuibinglengditiezhetadepifu，

meiyibudouxiangcaizaijielebingdezhenzhanshang。yushuimohuleshixian，qianfangneigechenmoqianxingdeheisebeiying，

zaihuiandetiandijian，xiandeneimejin，youneimeyaobukeji。3rijijiezhenxiangsantianhoudewuhou，

yangguangzhongyujiannandisipolelianrideyinyun，linsedisaxiajilvcandandeguangxian。bieshuliqueyijiukongkuanglengqing，

mimanzheyizhongchenailuodinghoudesiji。suwanqingdeyiwubuduo，

doubeishenyanzhoudezhuliyongyigebudadezhixiangzhuangzhe，songdaolejiali。zhixiangjiufangzaishufangguangjiedehongmudibanshang，

xiangyigetuwuchuangrude、zhuangzheguowangdepanduolamohe。linwanzhanzaishufangmenkou，youyulehenjiu。

zhijianjicipengdaobingliangdehuangtongmenbashou，yousuolehuilai。shenyanzhouyidazaojiuchulemen，

shuoshigongsiyoujinjishiwu。tazhidao，tashizaitaobi，

taobizheigefangjianlijijiangbeifankaide、shuyulingyigenvrendeyiqie。zuizhong，tahaishituikailemen。

yangguangtouguojudadeluodichuang，zaishensededibanshangqiegechumingliangdejihetuxing。

neizhixianganjingditangzaiguangyingjiaojiechu，chenmodisanfazheyizhongwuxingdeyali。linwanshenxileyikouqi，zouguoqu，

dunxiashen。zhixiangmeiyoufengkou，limiandiefangzhejijianzhidirouruandenvshiyiwu，yansesuya。

yibenyingqiaodesuxiebenyazaiyiwushangmian，bianjiaoyouxiemosun。zuixiamian，

luchuyigeshenlansebumianbijibendeyijiao。tadexintiaomomingdikuailejifen，zhijianyouxiefaliang。

taxiannaqineibensuxieben。fankai，qianbidexiantiaoliuchangerchongmanshengmingli，daduoshifengjing，yeyoujizhangrenxiang。

qizhongyizhang，shishenyanzhounianqingshideceying，xiantiaorouhe，yanshenzhuanzhu，

daizheyizhonglinwancongweizaitayanzhongjianguode、jinhuchuncuidemingliangguangcai。

tazhijianqingqingfuguoneihuazhongrennianqingdelianpang，xintoufanqiyisisuansedelianyi。taheshangsuxieben，

muguangzhongxinluohuineigeshenlansedebijibenshang。takanqilaigengjiu，yegengsimi。

zhijianchupengdaoneilvexiancucaodebumian，xinzangxiangshibeishenmedongxiqingqingnieleyixia。

tahuanhuandijiangbijibenchoulechulai。shenlansedefengmianyijingyouxietunsefanbai，bianjiaobeimodeqilemaobian，

touchuyizhongbeisuiyuehewushucidefanyuefanfudamodewenrungan。fengmianshangmeiyourenheziji，

zhiyouyipianchenmodelan。linwanzaishuzhuoqiandeyizishangzuoxia，wuhoudeyangguangxiexiedichuanguochuangboli，

zaizhuomianshangtouxiayikuaimingliangquehaowuwendudeguangban，zhenghaoluozaineibenshenlansedebijibenshang。tafankaifeiye，

muguanglveguo，meiyoutingliu。zhijiannianqiyiye，zhizhangfachuqingweide、ganzaodecuixiang。ranhou，

tadedongzuotingzhule。yixingshuxideziji，xiangbinglengdegangzhen，cubujifangdicirutadeyanlian。

neishishenyanzhoudezi，tarende，gangjingyouli，daizhetateyoudeliluozhuanzhe。“2008nian，

11yue17ri。yin。”“jintianzaiyiyuanzoulang，zhuangjianyigenvhai。tadunzaineiliku，jianbangyichouyichoude，

xiangzhibeiyulintoudexiaomao。hushizaihantademingzijiaofei，‘linwan，linwanjiashu！

’……tataiqitoucayanleideshunjian，wolengzhule。neishuangyanjing……taixiangle。shilulude，yanweiweiweixiachui，

neizhongmangranyouwuzhudeyangzi……jianzhihewanqingdangnian，yimoyiyang。”linwandehuximengdiyizhi，

fangfobeirenezhulehoulong。tarendeneigeriqi！neishitarenshengzhongzuiheianderizizhiyi。

tadunzaibinglengcaozadeyiyuanzoulangli，yinweimuqinganggangquezhendehuaixiaoxierbengkuidaku，

wuzhudexiangnishuidehaizi。yuanlai，zaineipianjuewangdeshenyuanli，cengyouguozheiyangyishuangyanjingzaizhushizheta？

bushiyinweilianmin，ershiyinwei……xianglingyigeren？zhijiankaishibushoukongzhidizhandou，

jihuyaonabuwenneibobodezhiye。taqiangpozijiwangxiakan，muguangsisidingzaineixingxingdemojishang，

meiyigezidouxiangcuiledudebingzhui，henhenzaojintadeyandi。“wanqingjintianqingkuanghenbuhao，

yishengdehua……xiangdaozi。talazhewodeshou，henxuruo，danshuodehenqingchu。tashuo，‘yanzhou，dayingwo，

bieyigeren……niyaohaohaode，

yaoxingfu……buranwozouyezoubuanxin……’”“xingfu……”linwanwushengdijujiaozhezheilianggezi，

weiliyizhenfanjiangdaohaidebingliang。tazhandoudifanguoyiye，zhizhangfachucierde**。“2009nian，

3yue5ri。qing，danfenghenda。”“you‘ouyu’lelinwanjici。zaikafeiguan，tasihuchangquneilikanshu。

zaijiejiaodehuadian，tatiaohuadeyangzihenzhuanzhu。tashenshangyouzhonganjingderenxing，hewanqingguzilidewenroubutong，

dan……neishuangyanjing，meicikandao，douxiangbeishenmedongxihenhenzhuangyixiaxinzang。yishengshuo，

wanqingdeshijian……kenengjiuzaizheijigeyuele。tazuihoudeyuanwang……shikanwoxingfu。

”linwandexintiaoshengzaisijideshufanglileigubanfangda，zhendeermowengwengzuoxiang。takandaoxiamianneixingzi，

meiyigebihuadoudaizheyizhongbinglengde、chenailuodingdecanku：“yexu，zheijiushimingyunjiwodedaan。

linwan……wan……jiranwanqingyaowoxingfu，ertayouyouzhewanqingdeyanjing……neijiuzheiyangba。wojuedingquta。

zhishao，kanzheneishuangyanjingdeshihou，tongkuhuishaoyidian？huoxu，wanqingyenenganxinxie……”“weng”deyisheng，

linwanzhijuedenaoziliyoushenmedongxichedizhakaile，suichengyipianpianjianruidebingzha，

fengkuangdiqiegezhemeiyigenshenjing。yanqianyizhenfahei，neishuxidezijizaizhiyeshangniuqu、xuanzhuan。

tamengdiyongshouchengzhuchenzhongdeetou，zhijianbingliang，shenshenqiajintaiyangxuedepirouli，

shituyongzheijianruidetengtonghuanhuiyisiqingming。bushiai！conglaidoubushi！

neichanglingtapengranxindong、zuizhongjuedingjiaofuyishengdechuyu，neichangzaimeishuguanguangyingmilidezoulangli，

tazhuzuzaitahuazuoqian，yanshenzhuanzhuershensuide“ouyu”……yuanlaizhishiyichangjingxincehuadepianju！

yigenanrenweilewanchenglingyigenvrenlinzhongzhutuo，duizhetaneishuangkusiwangrendeyanjing，touxiadebinglengyouer！

xinzangbeiyizhiwuxingdeshouzuanjin、rounie，tengdetajihuquansuoqilai。houlonglixiangshiduleyikuaishaohongdeluotie，

youganyoutong，fabuchuyidianshengyin。yuanlaizijizheiqiniandehunyin，

zheiqiniandefuchu、qidai、xiaoxinyiyidehuanxihehuandehuanshideweiqu，jingshizheiyangyichangchetoucheweidexiaohua！

tazhishiyigehuozhede、yonglaishengfanglingyigenvrenyingziderongqi！

yigebeineishuangyanjingmaihuilaide、yonglaiweijietawufaxiaojiedetongkudetidaipin！

judadebeifenhehuangmiuganrutonghaixiaobanxijuanerlai，jihuyaojiangtanibi。tasisiyaozhexiachun，

zhidaochangdaoyisitiexiubandexingtian。muguangsisididingzairijibenshang，xiangbinsideyeshoudingzhelierendedaofeng。

zhandoudezhijianjihuyaojiangneicuiruodezhizhangsilie，tadaizheyizhongjinhuzinvedejuejue，mengdifanguoyiyeyouyiye。

neixiewenzi，neixiejiluzhetaziyiweipingdanxingfurichangdewenzi，cikedouhuazuolecuidudebishou，

yidaodaolingchizhetadexin。“2010nian，6yue12ri。yu。”“linwanpaolepuer。tazongpaobuhao，

weidaobushitaidanjiushitaise。wanqingpaodecha，yongyuanwenrunchunhou，daizheqiadaohaochudehuigan。jintianzheibei，

youqinanhe。kanzhetaqidaideyanshen，wozhinengmianqianghexiaqu。weilihenbushufu。tadagaiyongyuanbuhuimingbai，

youxiedongxi，bushinulijiunengmofangde。”linwandezhijianhenhenkoujinlezhangxin，liuxiashenshendeyueyahen。

tajideneigexiayudewuhou！tateyiqumailezuihaodepuer，zhaozhewangshangdejiaocheng，xiaoxinyiyi，

shengpashuiwenbudui，shengpashijianbugou。tamanxinhuanxididuanjita，tadangshizhishidandandi“ng”leyisheng，

chenmodiheledabanbei。yuanlaineichenmodebeihou，shirucidexianqihebijiao！yuanlaitameiyicibenzhuodechangshi，

zaitayanlidouzhishiduiwanqingzhuolieyoukexiaodemofang！yigubinglengdechirugancongjiaodizhichongtouding。

tafengkuangdiwanghoufan，zhizhanghuahuazuoxiang，xiangjicuertongkudechuanxi。“2012nian，9yue3ri。menre。

”“tahuaiyunle。bengaigaoxingde。keweishenme……weishenmewonaozilihuizhibuqude，

quanshiwanqingdangnianshiquneigehaizishi，cangbairuzhidelian，hekongdongjuewangdeyanshen？neigehaizi，ruguoshengxialai，

gaiduodale……kanzhelinwanxiaoxinyiyimozheduzi，manlianchuweirenmudexiyue，

woxinlizhiyouyipianhuangwudemamu。haoxiangyoushenmehenzhongyaodedongxi，zaihenjiuyiqianjiuyijingchedisidiaole，

zaiduode‘xin’，yetianbumanneigedong。”linwandeshoumengdiwuzhuxiaofu，

neilicengjingyunyuguoyigeduanzandeshengming。neigehaizi，zaitahaowufangbeidexiyuezhongdaolai，

youzaiyiciyiwaishuaidaohouwuqingliqu。dangshitatangzaibinglengdebingchuangshang，shentihexindouxiangbeitaokongle，

tongbuyusheng。shenyanzhoushouzaitachuangbian，chenmodiwozhetadeshou，tayiweineishiwuyandeanwei，

shifuqigongdandetongchu。yuanlaibushi！yuanlaitadangshidechenmoheyandishenbujiandidebeiliang，bingfeiweita，

ershiweilelingyigenvren，weilelingyigecongweichushidehaizi！tashiqudegurou，zaitaxinli，

jingzhishiyouyicicankuditixingzhetahewanqingneiweijindeyihan！tadetongku，tadejuewang，

zaitajudade、shuyulingyigenvrendebeishangmianqian，miaoxiaodeshenzhibuzhiyiti！leishuizhongyujuedi，

dakedakedizaluozaifanhuangdezhiyeshang，xunsuyinkaishensede、chouloudeleihen。tashikongdigengyanchusheng，

shentiyinweijidudebeitongerjuliedizhandou，quansuozaikuandadeyizili，xiangyigebeiquanshijieyiqidepojiuwanou。

xinbeitaokongle，zhishengxiayigejudade、guanzhebinglenghanfengdeheidong，huhuzuoxiang，tunshizheyiqiecancundewendu。

tabuzhidaozijikuleduojiu，zhidaohoulongganyafatong，yanjingzhongdejihuzhengbukai。

shufangliguangxianyijinganchenxialai，chuangwaishichengshihuanghunmohudelunkuo。neibenrijihaitankaizaizhuoshang，

xiangyigewushengdechaofeng。tataiqichenzhongde、bumanleihendelian，

shixianzaiciluohuineibenshenlansede、fangfoxibaoletasuoyouyanleidebijibenshang。yigugengshendehanyijuezhuleta。

rijihaimeiwan，houmianhaiyoukongbaiye！neixiekongbaiye，xiangchenmodeshenyuan，yinyouzheta，yekonghezheta。

yizhongjinhuzihuidechongdongqushizheta。tashenchuzhandoudebuchengyangzideshou，zhijianbinglengjiangying，

jiannandibokaineixiebeileishuijintou、biandechenzhongerzhanliandezhizhang。yiye，youyiye。

neixiejiluzhetatidaipinshengyadequruwenzizhongyufanguoqule，luchulehoumiankongbaidezhiye。

tadexintidaolesangziyan，daizheyizhongbinlinzhixidekongjuhejuewangdeyugan。zhijianhuaguocucaodezhimian，zhongyu，

zaijiejinzuihoudedifang，tadedongzuotingzhule。moji！shixindemoji！

butongyuqianmianneixiehuoshenhuoqian、daizhesuiyuehenjideziji，zheiyiyedezi，mosenonghei，

bihuashenzhidaizheyidiandianweiwanquangantoudenianliangan，xianranshixinxiebujiude。tadetongkongzhouransuojin，

sisididingzhuneijixingzi。meiyigezidouxiangshaohongdetieqian，henhentangluozaitadeshiwangmoshang，

liuxiajiaoheide、yongbumomiedeyinji：“2023nian，10yue19ri。wanqinglikai，diqinian。

”“qinianle。shijianzhenkuai，youzhenman。linwanjiushuizaigebifangjian。zheigejia，youtadalidehenji，

youtadeqixi。keweishenme……weishenmemeiciwuyemenghui，jingxingwode，yongyuanzhiyouwanqingzuihouneibingliangdeshou，

heneiju‘yaoxingfu’？xinkouneigedifang，haoxiangcongtabishangyanjingneiyikeqi，jiuchedikongle，dongzhule，

zaiyewubure。”“qinianle，linwan……tahenhao。nulidibanyanzhe‘shentaitai’，nulidixiangkaojinwo。

keneishuangyanjing，yuekanyueqingchu，zhongjiubushiwanqing。tapaodecha，zuodecai，tashuohuadeyuqi，

shenzhitaxiaoqilaideyangzi……doubushi。zaixiang，yezhishiyanpin。shijianyuezhang，

zhei‘xiang’fanerchenglezuishendezhemo。shishikekezaitixingwo，zhendeneige，yongyuanhuibulaile。

”“qinianle……”linwankandaozheili，huxiyijingwanquantingzhi，xiongtangjulieqifu，quexibujinyisikongqi。

takandaozuihouyixingzi，neimojisihubiqitadifanggengzhong，gengyongli，litouzhibei，

daizheyizhongguzhuyizhide、juewangdexuangao：“wanqing，qinianle，wohaishizhiaini。zhiaini。congweigaibian。

”“hong——！”fangfoyidaowushengdejingleizaitalinghunshenchuzhakai！

zuihouneidiancancunde、yaoyaoyuzhuide、mingwei“huoxutaduiwoyeyouneimeyidiandianzhenxin”dehuanxiang，

beizheizuihouyixingzichedi、ganjing、canrendijidefensui！“zhiaini。congweigaibian。”qigezi，

xiangqibashaohongdebishou，jingzhunwubiditongchuanletazaoyiqianchuangbaikongdexinzang，ranhouhenhenjiaodong！

yuanlaiqiniandechaoxixiangchu，qiniandetongchuanggongzhen，qiniandexuhanwennuan（napazhishitadanfangmiande），

zaitaxinli，jingranmeiyouliuxiayisiyihaodehenji！tasuoyoudenuli，suoyoudefuchu，suoyoudecunzai，

douzhishiyigekebeidebeijingban，yigeyonglaichentuotaduiwanqingnei“yonghengbubian”shenqingdedaoju！

judadejuewangxiangbinglengdechaoshui，shunjianmiedingerlai，jiangtachediyanmei。zhixiganezhulehoulong，

yanqiandeshijiekaishixuanzhuan、fahei、bengta。weilifanjiangdaohai，yigunongliedeexinganzhichonghoutou。

tamengdiyongshouwuzhuzui，shentijuliedijingluanleyixia，queshenmeyetubuchulai，

zhiyoubinglengdesuanshuizhuoshaozheshidao。taxianggemuouban，jiangyingdi、huanmandicongyizishanghualuoxialai，