我妈是个大嘴巴火火-著

小说简介

zheibenshuwomashigedazuibazhengtijiegoushejidebucuo，bazhurengongqianqianqiqikehuadelinlijinzhi。xiaoshuojingcaijiexuan「nimenjiuzhangzhewoshigefurenhaoqifu，nizheimeyouzhong，zheimexihuandabaobuping，zenmebuqumatatongshimatalingdaoqu，zheishiernandaoquanshiwoyigerendecuoma……

精彩章节

1

womashigedazuiba，wopingshidoufangzheta。

danqianfangwanfang，haishibeiwomazhidaolingdaodandujiwozhanggongzideshier。

getian，gongsijiuchuanyanwogenlingdaoyouyitui。

lingdaolaopofawei，bawotichuletuandui。

womakaishizhuangsha：「womeigenrenshuoguoa。」

wobaqidebahuapingzale：「meigenrenshuo？fuxinghaosududoumeinizuikuai！」

......

womashichulemingdedazuiba，jialidedashixiaoshi，tadounengyijianbuluodidouluochuqu。

jiulianwoba**shangzhangzhichuangzheishier，tadounengchuandequanxiaoqudouzhidao。

weici，jialirenmeishaogenwomachaojia。

womenrangtashaogenwairenjiangjialideshier，danwomajuede，tajiushixianliaotianer，suikouyishuoeryi，renweishiwomentaixiaotidazuo。

wojibenshangshenmeshierdoubugentajiang，shengpatayouxuejibierenting。

danqianfangwanfang，yenanbaoyoushiwudeshihou。

neitian，wodaojiatuowaitaodeshihou，gongzitiaocongdoulihuachulaile，womayanjianshoukuai，xunsucongdishangjianqilai。

kandaowodegongzishi，tajingyadihanchusheng。

「qianqian，nizhanggongzile？！」

woyibajianggongzitiaocongwomashoulihaohuilai，zhiqingqingdi「ng」leyisheng，jiuganjinliuzoule。

wozaiguoqishangban，youyugongzuonenglituchu，lingdaotoutoujiwozhangxin，rangwogentongshibaomi。

kemeiguojitian，wojiutingdaogongsiyourenzaibeihouyilunwo，shuowogenlingdaoyouyitui，lingdaosidixiahaijiwokaixiaozao。

dangshiwodediyifanyingjiushi，kendingshiwomagenbierenshuolesha。

huidaojiahou，wolimazhiwenwoma，shibushibawozhanggongzideshiershuochuqule，dantajianjuefouren。

「woxiandemeishiertiantiandingzhenineidiangongziganshenme？biechuleshenmeshier，douwangwoshenshangkoushipenzi。」

我根本不信她的。

「ma，xianzaizheigejingjixingshizheimecha，suoyourendouzaijiangxin，jiuwozhangxin，zheiyaoshiranggongsiderenzhidaole，kendinghuiyoubushaorenchuowojilianggu，zheimehaodegongsi，wojiponaodaicaijijinqu，nikeqianwanbiejiwotianluanle。」

xiangdangchu，weilenengjinzheijiagongsi，wobazaizheiergongzuodexuezhangxuejieqiulegebian，caidedaoyixieneibuziliao，youaolehaojigetongxiaokanshushuati，zuizhongtongguolebishi，dedaolemengmeiyiqiudegongzuojihui。

suoyiwofeichangzhenxizheifengongzuo，shenzhihuizhudongyaoqiujiaban，jiushiweilezaizhongduoyouxiubiyeshenglituoyingerchu。

wonulizheimejiudelaidejihui，zhendebuxiangyinweizheixiexianyansuiyubaifeile。

yinci，wozaisankenqiuwoma，qianwanqianwanbieluanchuanwodeshier。

danwomayitingwozheimeshuo，zhijieyuandibaozha。

「niyoushenmezhengjushuoshiwowangwaichuande，zheishiernibanididouzhidao，nizenmebuquwentamen！yitiantiandeshashierdoulaiwo，wofanshenmezuile，nimendouzheimeduiwo！」

「nimengongsideren，woyigedouburenshi，shangnaerchuanqu！zhidingshinizijishuolouzuile，laiwozheiersaqi。zhengzheimeduoqianmeijianxiaoshunwojige，tiantianzangzheyezhede，baiyanlangyige！nimenningjiayesaer，meiyigehaowanyier！」

womayueshuoyuejidong，houdesangzidoupile。

wobatingdongjingbudui，ganjincongshufangchulaikankanshenmeqingkuang。

jianwomaweiqudezhimoyanlei，woyehuaiyizijishibushicuoguaitale，bijinggongsiguanxibenlaijiuhenfuza，yourenguyizaoyaoyebushibukeneng。

yushi，zaiwobadediaojiexia，wogenwomadaoleqian。

takanwotaiduchengken，qingxujianjianpingfuxialaile。

「nibaozheng，yihoubuhuizaiwuyuanwugudihuaiyiwole。」

我乖乖照做。

「wobaozheng！jueduibuzaihaowugenjudihuaiyini，tianjiushitaxialai，yebunengdongyaowoduimuqindarendexinren！」

「真的？」

woyanshenjiandingdixiangyaorudang，juzhequantouxinshidandandao：

「tiandikejian，riyueweizheng！ruyouqipian，jiurangwoshangcesuoyongyuanwangdaizhi！」

womapuchiyishengxiaochulai。

「chouyatou，zhidaocuolejiuhao。」

tacaquyanjiaodelei，meitouyeshuzhankai。

danguolebanshang，tayouzuochuyifumanbujingxindeyangzilaishitanwo。

「bujiushizhanggongzima，bierenzhidaoleyounengzenmeyang，hainengchilenia。」

woyaoyaotou，yuzhongxinzhangdao：

「manibuzhidao，dagongsizhichangruzhanchang，sheixinlidouyoudianxiaojiujiu，wozheigegangweiyanhongderenhenduo，yigebuxiaoxinjiuhuibeirenlaxiama。」

womaruoyousuosididiandiantou。

「这样啊……」

neijitiangongsiyaoyanmantianfei，yuechuanyuelipu，tongshikanwodeyanshendoubianle。

benyiweiwozhiyaotatashishizuoshi，buqulicai，yaoyanjiuhuimanmanpingxi，kemeixiangdaozuizhonghaishibaoleile。

moutian，lingdaodelaopolaigongsitanwang，haireqingdiqingsuoyouyuangonghekafei，keweidumeiyouwode。

kanzhedajiayigegeshoupengzhekafei，youshuoyouxiaode，wozhijuedeganga。

taluguowogongweishi，haiyouyiwuyidipielewoyiyan，xiangdaorendeyanshenzangdouzangbuzhu，zhenggebangongshiderendouzaikanwoxiaohua。

wodangshijiujuedehenweiqu。

zuoweiyigebagongsidangjiadegongzuokuang，qinqinkenkengongzuolesannian，queyinweijijumoxuyoudeyaoyanjiubeigulizhendui，xinlihenbushiziweier。

dangtianxiawu，lingdaobawojiaoqubangongshi，shuaijiwoyifenwenjian。

kandaowenjianmingdeyichanei，wochadianmeibengzhu，shangmianxiezhe「diaogangtongzhishu」wugedazi。

yishunjian，woxintiaodouloulebanpai。

「xiaoninga，nizaizheierganlesannian，duigongsidegongxianwodoukanzaiyanli，suoyibanidiaoquhouqinbuzuojingli。」

hehe，houqinbu……sheidouzhidaojinlehouqinbujiuxiangdangyubeidarulenggong，gongzicongyiwanjiangdaosiqianbushuo，yidancaiyuanhouqinbuyidingshoudangqichong，suishidoukenengjuanpugaizouren。

zhenggeqianziguochengwodoumimihuhude，lianlingdaohoumianshuoleshenmedoumeitingqing。

zhijidewozouchubangongshishi，lingdaoyinyangguaiqidilaileju：

「yihoushuohuaguoguonaozi，daonalidoudeguanzhuzui，dazuibaderenzaizhichangshangdoumeihaoxiachang。」

zheihuabuguangwotingdaole，zaichangdetongshiyetingdaole。

wozhidao，lingdaoguyishuoneimedasheng，jiushiweilegenwopieqingguanxi，bingqiezheizhongshiyidinghenkuaijiuhuizaiquanbumenchuankai。

woshenzhinengxiangxiangdao，bierenhuizaisidixiabawoxiangdeyouduomebukan。

wodizhetouhuidaogongweishoushidongxi，suoyourendoutingxiashouzhongdegongzuo，jiangmuguangjinjindizhazaiwoshenshang。

woyijingbujideneitianxiawuwoshizenmeguode，yebujidewoshizenmehuidaodejia。

yijinjiamen，wojiuchedibengbuzhule，yanleichuanzhusidebadabadawangxiadiao。

cishi，womazhenggenrendadianhualiaowomeimeideshi。

jiantayouzaigenbierenbagua，wofafengle。

「niyouzaishuoyouzaishuo，shenmeshiqingdouwangwaishuo！wogenwomeichizaohuibeinizheizhangzuibahaisi！！」

womaniutoukanzhewo，yiliandechunzhenwugu。

「meicishuoninijiushizheifubiaoqing，haoxiangshenmeshidougenniwuguanyiyang！jialidedashixiaoshinidouwangwaiche，xianzaihaole，wobeidiaoligangweile，wosannianlaisuoyoudenuliquandouchengpaomole，nimanyileba！」

「niweishenmejiuguanbuzhuzuia，shaoshuodianxianhuahennanma！」

wokudebunengziyi，yigunaojiangfenmenquandouqingxiechulai。

womabeiwozheiyangheleyitiao，ganjinguaduanledianhua。

cishidewoyijingqidetounaofazhang，chadianyundao。

wobalaiketingjianwozheiyang，ganjinbawofudaoshafashang，xintengdibaozhewowen：

「baobeiguinva，fashengshale，genbashuo，bajinizuozhu！bukule。」

tapaizhewodehoubei，wenroudianfuzhe，guolehaobantian，wocaihuanguojingerlai，yiwuyishidigenwobashuolezheishier。

wobatingwan，qidelianzhangdetonghong。

「niyoubaguinvzheishierjidouchuqule？！」

womazaiyipangbugankaojin，zhiyigejingerdiyaotoufouren。

「meiyoua，tatongshiwolianrenshidouburenshi，wonenggensheishuoa。」

「nimeishuo，neiguishuode？guinvzheishierzhiyouzanzijiarenzhidao，wozheijitianlianjiamendoumeichuguo，yemeigenwairendaguodianhua，qiqihaizaiwaidishangxue，jiuzhiyounitiantianzaiwaimianbitaotao，bushinishuodehainengshishei！」

wobayanzhuzidouzaiwangwaimaohuo，yibianzhiwenwoma，yibianrouzhewodenaodaianweiwo。

womasuozaiyibianshikoufouren，danmingxiandiqibuzu。

jianwomahaishisibuchengren，wobayichongdong，congshafashangtiaoqilaibabeizishuaisuile。

「guinvdouzheiyangle，nihaizaineilituixiezeren，nidaodiyoumeiyoudianliangzhi！wanglijuannishuohuaa！！！」

wobaqishixiongxiongdibawo**daoqiangjiao，nuhenhendidengzheta。

womazhaojiabuzhu，zuihouchengrenle。

「haoba……shiwo，shiwoshuodexingleba……nizheimedengzhe**ma？wojiusuikouyishuo，sheizhidaohuichuzheidangzishier。」

「nizenmegenwairenshuode？」

「wo……wojiushuowoguinvyoubenshi，renjialingdaoqizhongta，teyijitajiaqian……」

wotingbuxiaqule，zhijiedaduanleta。

「nishizheimeshuodema？nizhidaowotongshizaibeihoudouzenmejiangdema？shuowoshige**，gouyinshangsi，kaojirenjiadangqingfumouli！niyaozhishishuowozhanggongzile，renjiahuichuandezheimelipuma！」

我妈心虚地反驳我。

「nijiuyigeerbende，danweizheimeduomingxiaoshengdoumeizhanggongzi，jiujinizhangle，renkendingjuedexiqiaoa，jiuzheimeshuonilebei，nengguaiwoma？」

wobeitaduidexiaochushenglai。

「hahahahawoerbende……woerbendezhanggongzijiushibeiqianguizehahahahaha……wodenuliheyejizaixuelimianqianyiwenbuzhi，wojiuhuogaibeima**，huogaizuolengbandeng，quandoushiwozuiyouyingde！hahahahahaha……」

woxiaodefadian，lianweidouzaichouchou。

我爸眼眶都红了。

「guinv，zheibushinidecuo，doushibadecuo，shibameikanhaonima，wodehaoguinv。」

tashuozhe，xintengdibaozhewoku。

wushunankandejiyizaiwonaohaizhongshanxian，xiangdaocongxiaodaodajiuyinweiwomazheizhangdazuiba，haidequanjiadoumeihaoriziguo，wodeweijiuyizhenzhenjiaotong。

xiaoxuedeshihou，wobakaiguoyijiamianguan，shengyixiangdanghuobao，womadaochugenrenxianbaiwobayoudumenmifang，jieguomeiguoduojiu，wojiafujinjiuduolehaojigemianguan，weidaodouyimoyiyang，yingshengshengbawobadediangaokuale。

woshangchuzhongneihuierrenyuantehao，pengyouhenduo，qizhongbufayounansheng。womajiugenrenshuowozaolian，haihuanguohaojigenanpengyou。

daxuedeshihou，woyaoqinganliandexuezhanglaiwojiachifan，jieguowomabawocongxiaodaodadeqiushishuolegebian，haishuowocongxiaojiuxihuanhuannanpengyou，congcixuezhangzaiyemeizhaowoliaoguotian。

beiqinmabeicideshiqingtaiduotaiduo，woshenzhiyiduxianggentaduanjueguanxi，dannianjitashengwoyangwo，bianyizhirenzhe。

danwowulunyexiangbudao，youyitianwodeqiantuhuibeitaduansongdiao！

cikewozhendehenta，qiansuoweiyoudehen！

yixiangdaowozhengqudaodeyiqiedemeihao，douhuibeitaqinshouzhanduan，wobiangandaojuewang，zhenggerentanzaishafashangyidongbudong，liankudoujuedefeili。

womajianwoxiangsileyiyangtangzaineier，youxiepale，zoudaowoshenbian，dishengxiyudigenwodaoqian。

「duibuqiqianqian，mamazhidaocuole，nibiehewo，mamayihoubushuonideshile，nizhanqilaizouzou，biehewoa！」

「woyebuzhidaoshiqinghuifazhanchengzheigeyangzi，nishiwonver，wozuoshenmedoushiweilenihaoa。」

「wojiushigenrenxianliaotian，sheizhidaohuichuandaonigongsili，nimenlingdaoyezhenshide，yinweijijuxianhuajiubanidiaozoule，yetaibadaoleba。」

tayueshuoyuelizhiqizhuang，youbazerentuidaolingdaohetongshitoushang。

「yaowoshuo，guigenjiedihaishinitongshidewenti，sidixiadexianhuazenmehaixuejilingdaotingni？lingdaoyeshigesixinyan，tingtingjiudelebei，haidanghuishierle，zheimedadegongsixianhuakendingbushao，tajingranweilejijuhuajiaoshangjingle！」

woyijingbuxiangzaitingtataotao，tayongyuandoubuhuirenweizijidexingweiduomeelie，yebujuedetajiwodeshenghuodailaiduodadedaji。

meiyourennengjiaoxingyigezhuangshuideren。

wotuozhepibeideshenzihuilefangjian，bazijimengzaibeizili，shenmedoubuxiangshuo，yeshenmedoubuyuanxiang。

gezhemen，wotingdaowobaxiongwoma，haibashenmedongxizale。

「nikanbudaoguinvbeinibichengshenmeyanglema？haizaineilijiaobian！feiyaobatabisicaixingshiba！」

「weilezuohaozheigegongzuo，tatiantianqizaotanheide，tafendoulezheimejiu，jiuyinweinizheizhanglanzuiquanbaifeile，guinvdeqiantuquanbeinihuile！」

「yiqianhaiwojiusuanle，xianzaihaidaohaizitoushang，nitaniangdejiushigehairenjing，zhenggejiadouyaobeinituokuale，nihaizaineierbuzhihaodaidishuoshuoshuo！」

womayeyishengbiyishenghoudeda。

「nimenshenmeshierdoulaiwo，wojiubuxin，liangjuhuahainengbarenyansi！fashengzheigeshier，woshiyouzeren，neiwobudaoqianlema！」

「nimenjiuzhangzhewoshigefurenhaoqifu，nizheimeyouzhong，zheimexihuandabaobuping，zenmebuqumatatongshimatalingdaoqu，zheishiernandaoquanshiwoyigerendecuoma！」

wobameiyouzaishuohua，menwaichenmolehaojiu。

woxiang，tayechedijuewangleba。

meicifashengzheizhongshi，womadoushibutongbuyangdidaogeqian，ranhouyijiuwoxingwosu。

zaitayanli，jiarendeyinsishitazuidadetanzi，zhiyoujiangzheixiedeshihou，tacainengdedaogengduodeguanzhu。

henduoshihouwodoujuede，tabushibudongdezunzhongyinsi，tashizhendebingle。

genyigeyoudumuqinbangzaiyiqi，riziyongyuandoubuhuiyoushengji。

jingguobeilingdaoyinyangneijianshi，wozaigongsidemingshengyechoule。

xinbumendelingdaoyeshinande，jianwojiugenjiandaowenshenyiyang，shengpagenwocheshangyidianguanxi。

xintongshiyigegekanzheheheqiqide，beidilimeishaoyilunwo。

youshihoutamensanwugerenjuzaiyiqiliaotian，yijianwolailejiuganjinjiazhuangmangshiqing，haihuxiangshiyansetouxiao，

bumenjucandoumeirenjiaowo，jiulianzhiweibiwodide，douhuishihuanwoliangxia，haoxiangzhetengwoshitamendelequyiyang。

judadexinliluochahetongshideguli，rangwoyuelaiyueyayi，shouzheyifenhaowuqiantudegangweiyijingmeiyourenheyiyile，yushizuizhongbudeyicizhi。

zaijiadezheiduanshijian，shenghuoyebingbutaiping。

womazhidaozheicishiqingnaodale，huoxushichuyukuijiu，tameitiangenwoshuohuadouhenxiaoxinyiyi，haihuibianzhefaerdizuoxiehaochide。

jitianxialai，woduitadeqixiaoleyixie，yiweizheicijinglirangtayexiqulejiaoxun，yihouzuibakeyiguandeyandianer，jieguowoyouzailoudaolitingtagenmoshengrenbaguameimei，wocaishenkedimingbai，tashibuhuigaide。

wulunwomazaizenmetaohaowo，wodoubuxiangzaigentalache。

zhongyu，womayebengbuzhule。

neitianwobazijiguanzaiwoshili，womaqiaomenjiwosongchide，danwoxinqinghencha，shenmeyechibuxia。

wojujuerangwomajinmen，jieliansicihou，tazhijienayaochikaisuo，bamenchuaikaile。