zhujiaoshiluoyiheliyunmudexiaoshuojiao《zhongshengjiaoniangyeyousa》，shizuozhezijinqingxinchuangzuodeyibengudaiyanqingfenggedexiaoshuo，qingjieyinrenrusheng，feichangtuijian。zhuyaojiangdeshi：chuanyuechengemingzhaozhudeluoxiaoniangzi，luoyihelaibujiyumen，jiudekaishiweizijidexiaomingfendou。xibai？neishibukenengde。luoyihepoguanziposhuaiyilugaogemengjin，nvedaoyidizhazha。nvpeishiduobailianhua，meiguanxi，chuanyuedeliuge，yaobuyaolejieyixia？nvpeishizhongshengde。meiguanxi，liandanluyaobuyaolejieyixia？junqiaodelangjuntaidushe，luoyihezazazui，yongwanraozhezouba。liyunmu：“……”zaixiangyu，bushitajiansibujiu，ershixiangtazheibanshengminglangjie、zuoeduoduanderen，jiubupeihuozhe。dengdeng，zhiyoutacainengjietazhongdedu？liyunmuxingxing，zheijiugangale。...
“jixiale，jixiale。”erpangmoleyibaetoudelenghan。
shangyicitajililangjunzuotangbing，yishijidongduofanglebangenxiaocong，jieguo，lilangjunkanleyiyan，tangbingbuchile。
“啧！”
shensitingdeshizhizeshe，“nijialangjunzheishihesheitaodeshipu？taoshipuzuoshenme？zhijiejiangchuzitaoguolaia！taneimeduoshi，bushipingbaizhetengerpangma？”
“wojialangjunzheishijinshen。”zhengzhibuyunxurenherendihuitajialangjun，shensiyebuxing。
“jinshen？wokanshimafan。”
shensibuxiepiezui，mouguangyizhuankanxiangjilongzilidewuji，zalezazui，zhishuozhangxiang，zheizhiwuji，zhangdezhenbulai。
taqingkeyisheng，jianluoyihekanxiangta，chongjilongziyangleyangxiaba，zheizhikeyima？
luoyiheweiweidiantou，fanzhengshikaizhi，jisheikaibushikai。
shensichongsuixindiulegeyanse，suixinheiheixiaozhecoujinerpang，“wokankanshenmewuji？”
shuozhe，tayibaqiangguoerpangshouzhongdelongzi，feisuduodaoshensishenhou。
“沈郎君！”
zhengzhiduishensinumuershi。
“zheizhijiwokanshangle，duoshaoqian？suixin，jiqian！shuangbei！”
沈肆下巴微扬。
“shenlangjun，zheibushijigeqiandeshiqing，zheishiwojialangjunyaodeji。”zhengzhijulilizheng。
“suoyi，wochushuangbeia，huangeren，chi，nijuedewohuijiqian？”shensiyiliandelisuodangran。
jiuzhidaoyushensijiangbutongdaoli，zhengzhizhijiewangtashenhouraoqu，zhunbeijiangzijialangjundejiqianghuilai。zhishitayidong，shensiyedong，tazhuanlebanquan，yijiushizhimianshensi。
“shenlangjun！ninyaoshixiangyaozheizhiji，ninzijiquyuwojialangjunshuo。”
“haoa，jiwoxiannashang，yihuiwojiuhenijialangjunshuoqu。”shensichongsuixinyuluoyihediulegeyanse，sanrendaizhejilongziyiliuyandepaole，zhishengzhengzhizaishenhoutiaojiao。
huidaozuoyeluoyihezhudedingxiangxiaoyuan，shensicaizixidalianglongzilidewuji，bieshuo，liyunmusuishuoshiledian，danyanguanghaizhenbucuo，qiaoqiaozheiji，maosexuebaipengsong，zhangdedequehao，yihoudaichuqu，beiyoumianzi。
zhishi，tamosuolemosuoxiaba，zheitiaodoujiyibandouxuanmaoduanerxide，zheiyangkeyijianshaobeiduifangyaozhudejihui，zheizhiji，maorongrongde，zenmexiazuidoushiyizuimao。
“这只真行？”
tabuquedingdekanxiangluoyihe。
luoyihehunbuzaiyi，kaizhima，xiaoguozhikanwuzhong，bukanqita，zhiyaoshiji，kaichulaiyinggaidouchabuduo。
“fangxinba，shenlangjun。”
shensidianlediantou，shiyisuixinjiangjilongzijiaojiluoyihe，“jinahaole，haohaolian！lianhaolewobuhuikuidainide。keruoshiniganhunongwo，wojiurangniqupeiheiluocha、hongxiezi。”
这是要弄死她啊！
xiaoyahuanguoranhenrongyijiubeirenansi。
luoyihecheqichunjiao，“shenlangjunfangxin，jueduibuhuirangnishiwangde。”
“好好干。”
shensizhuanshenyuzou，quetingluoyihezeixixidehuanta，“langjun，ruoshiwozheidoujiliandehao，yihoukebukeyizhuanmenjilangjunxunliandouji？”
“不可以！”
shensihaimeiyoushuohua，yigefurenfennudeshengyinyiranxiangqi。
zhangmamayizhenfengsidechongdaoluoyihemianqian，ehenhendedengzheta，“nigesiyatouxiangbuxiangshangtian？shuohaolebangshenlangjunyiri，neijiushiyiri，duoyikeyebuxing。”
这死丫头命还真硬！
cuiyudouyijingjiangjialegouwendeyujisanhuanjita，tajingranhaimeishi。
zhangmamahenhenzhuantoukanxiangshensi，yihuanleyifumiankong，manlianduixiao。
“shenlangjunjianliang，zuoyeninyuwojiaxiaoniangzishuohaodeshijiedongmeiyiri，shiergeshichen，kebunengshuohuabusuanshu。buranmengtaifuzhidaolehuizefalangjunde。”
“你威胁我？”
shensidelianheile。zheipozijiuzhangzheyizhangqianzoudelian。ruozheibushimengfu，tazaojiurangsuixinzoutale。
“langjunshuoxiaole，laonuzenmeganweixielangjun？laonuzheishishanyidetixing。”
zhangmamashuozheyoukanxiangluoyihe，mouguangyinsen，ruotuntuzheshexindedushe，“dongmeia，nihaohaogan，aniangnayebuqu，jiuzaizheishouzheni。”
shensitiaoletiaomeikanxiangluoyihe，yongbuyongwojiangrenganzou？
luoyiheyaotou，“shenlangjun，manzou。”
tazhuanshenjinleyuanzi，“pa”deyishengguanshangyuanmen。
“niyaoshigandaoluan，wojiubanidangdouji。”shensijinggaowanzhangmama，shuaishouerqu。
zhidaoshensideshenyingxiaoshizaishixianzhizhong，zhangmamacaizhuanshenqutuidingxiangxiaoyuandeyuanmen，menbeiconglimianchashangle，meituikai。
“kaimen！nigesiyatou！”
“zhangmama！”yingshengdeshicuiyu，“dongmeiyaoxunliandouji，nibiechao。buranwoqugaosushenlangjun。”
zhangmamaliansebianlebian，peixiaodao，“haohao，wobuchao，cuiyua，nikanwozheinianjiyedale，tuijiaoyebuhao，qianduanrizihaishouleshang，hunshenteng，ninengbunengrangwojinqu？wobaozhengbuchao，yidianshengdoubuchu。”
menlidecuiyuchenmole，ruoshimeiyouduyujisandeshi，tayidinghuifangzhangmamajinlai，kexianzai……
“zhangmamahaishihuiqudengba。dengdongmeimangwanle，worangrentong……”
“哎哟，哎呦呦！”
cuiyudehuaweishuowan，biantingdaomenwaidezhangmamayilianchuandetonghu，taganjinbokaimenshuan，yuanmencailakaiyitiaofeng，zhangmamacuzhuangdeshenziruyimianqiangsideyijingjilejinlai。
“ni……nizenmenengzheiyang？”
cuiyuzhanghonglelian，lianyanquandoubeizhangmamadewuchijudongjiqihongle。
“heiheihei，”zhangmamashanxiaozhe，sixiachoulechoubujianluoyihe，zheicaiyoupeixiaodao，“nifangxin，wobuchusheng，baozhunyidianshengbuchu。”
bujicuiyujujuedejihui，zhangmamayipiguzaiqingzhuanpudeluyanshangzuolexialai。
“neiniqianwanbiechusheng，yebieluanzoudong。”
翠羽妥协。
“放心放心。”
shijianyidiandianliushi，cuiyujianzhangmamadequeyidongbudongzuozaineilimeiyoudaoluandeyisi，bianyequmangzijideshiqingle。
zhangmamadongledongpigu，jianmeirenlita，zhanqilai，chuichuitui，shenshengebo，jianyijiumeirenlita，tuishangjiuxiangzhuanglefenghuolunsoudecuandaoleluoyihechuangxia，couzhechuangfengxianglizhangwang。
limianyebujianluoyihedeshenying。
“人呢？”
zhangmamahuyizhezuochouyouchou，zuizhongfaxianmeirentashangyougerenying，haoxiangzai……zaihuhudashui。
“he！gougaibulechishi。”
tahaiyiweiluoyihezhendeyaoluyishou，meixiangdaobuguoshihunongshensi，douzheigeshihoule，jingranhainengshuidezhe，guoranshilannifubushangqiang。
我捅了疯批男主三刀，他却问我手疼不疼
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全家参加双十一答题大赛后，我被踢出购物车
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