2
woxinlidenuhuochadianbaofa。
她这不是搞笑吗?
xuexiaolidechaoshibenjiuyinggaiwumeijialian,suiranyouxiedaxueshengqueshiyouqian,danneixietiaojianyibanshenzhibuhaodexueshengjiubushenghuoma?
tadaohao,baxueshengdangjiucaile。
erqiexuexiaozheikuaidibenlaibenlaijiushiwojiade,dangchuwoxiangkaichaoshi,danwolaogongkaihuoyuangongsibangbuguolai,wocaibudebuzujitongweixiaoxuetongxuedeta。
tahuoxuwangledangnianshizenmebeiweiqiuwolaogongzujitadele。
dangnianweilezheijiapuzi,tagesanchawujiwomensongli,youdazhelaotongxuedeqihaogaoshanqing,wolaogongzuihounianzhedajiazhigenzhidicaizujita。
hetongyiqianjiushiwunian,erqiexuexiaozujingui,wolaogongtiliangtayoulianggehaizishangxue,meiyuehaibianyileyiqian。
zheimeduonianmeikuidaiguota,meixiangdaowobaigetanquejiangtadebenxingjinshouyandi。
tayueshibujiangli,woyueshigentagangshang。
xiawu,wozhaoyangzaixiaomenkoumaipingguo,kesheizhihoumianpaiduidequanshidayedama,haiyoubushaoranzhehuangmaomianxiangxionghendeshehuiren。
damajilewowukuaiqian,zaiwotanzigenqiantiaolaitiaoqu,yibianmamalielie,yibianyongliyouxianqibapingguodiuzaiyibian,pingguoxiangzhuanggunzaidishang,shunjianzachulelianggedakeng。
我耐心告诉她:
「dama,wozheixiepingguogetouhetiandudoushichabudoude,nizaibalaxiaqu,wozheihaizenmemaia?」
zheidamaxiangshibeidianrande**tong,jianzhesangzikaishirumaqilai:
「chengsebumanyiwohaibunengtiaole?yaoshiwomaidaohuaipingguochihuaileduzi,nifuzema?
「nianjixiaoxiaoxinxiongzheimexiaai,wokannideshengyiyezuobuzhang!」
我赶紧解释:
「bushizheiyangde,zheixiepingguodoushiwoqinzitiaoxuande,getouchadebuduo,jueduimeiyouchongyanhehuaipingguo,nijiufangxinba!」
tayueshuoyueqijing,zhijiezuodishangsapo:
「tianshade,youmeiyourenpingpinglia!wojiutiaolegepingguojiuqifuqiwozheilaotaipole!haiyoumeiyouwangfaa!」
我被这一幕弄懵了。
zhouweirenyilunfenfen,wobuxiangzaijiuchanxiaqu,yudaozheizhongchengxinzhanbianyidedamazhinengjitadianhaochu,wozirendaomeidejitazhuanglewuliugepingguo:
「dama,niganjinqilaiba,dishangleng。zheixiepingguojiudangwoshuocuohuajinipeizui。」
tahenhenyibala,daizibeisihuai,pingguogunluozaidi,shuaidexisui。
我也怒了:
「pingguojinile,qianwoyebuyao,nidaodiyaoganshenme?」
她一直哭喊:
「qifulaorenle,haiyoumeiyouwangfaa!」
tazheimeyinao,houmianpaiduiderenxiangshishoudaolexinhao,qizhongyigedahanlvxianjiwotanziyijiao,shiquzhichengdetanweishunjiandaole,pingguogunleyidi。
他指着我的脸:
「niyaobuyaolian?damatiaogepingguodoubuleyi,wokanjiushinitanziyoumaoni,zuozeixinxu!」
youtadongshou,shenhouderenfenfendongshoubawotanzizale,woyouqiyounu,danduifangqishibiren,wobeihemengle,yishimeixiangqibaojingdeshi。
zhidaowodetanzibeizalan,pingguodoushuaihuailetamencaimanyidelikai。
laotaipozhijiebuzhuangle,taqilaipaipaishenshangdehuichen,fanhuangdesanjiaoyanliquanshieyi:
「niyaoshizaidanwuwoerxifudeshengyi,nibaiyiciwolainaoyici,nibiexianganwendezhuanqian!」